Oh, Golightly, don't feel like you can't post here. Mostly because you are right, this should be the one safe place you can be you without worrying about someone not wanting to cope. But, as a side issue, please could you help those of us with primaries who WANT to learn from you, so all of the facts,
all of them not just the "fun" "positive" "cheerful" ones, can be brought to the table. Most of us hear your pain, and we are trying to understand.
I know that this is a secondaries thread, and I STILL blame the forum for the fact that all the threads are mingled on the "latest posts" page, so when you see one that catches your eye (Bernie Nolan!) you click on it without realising where in the forum heirarchy you are. Quite obviously I should be saying "I" here, except that I think it's how several of us 'primary ladies' got sucked into this discussion, almost by accident, as it were, and have stayed, despite the fact that we've all got a bit heated from time to time, because we DO care, we DO want to understand, and, here I am speaking entirely for me--I want to take the arguments out of the pink and fluffy realm. I am, slowly but surely, learning to look the facts in the eye, and, as I think LemonGrove said (here, somewhere else?) learning to live in the here and now. I like your last sentence, Lemongrove, "confronting the reality, learning about cancer, and gaining the confidence to deal with it".
Golightly, my father used to say "Don't let the turkeys get you down", meaning don't get swacked by silly people who don't know what they are talking about. I know that is easier said than done, especially if you feel like cr*p. But keep posting, your voice makes a difference. xxx
