67.3K members
1.2M posts
cancel
Showing results forΒ 
Search instead forΒ 
Did you mean:Β 

Bit confused

Emmajane
Member

Re: Bit confused

I wish I could give I a real hug. I c them tomo so guessing I will be same time scale. Had my scan Friday like u desperate to know its contained... Take comfort in we r going through this together and we will get through it!!!!!!! πŸ’•πŸ‘ŠπŸ½πŸ‘­
Jomo
Member

Re: Bit confused

So seen oncologist, cried , pressed for scan to be bought toward, got it tomorrow, but then I have results sooner, and strangely more scared, as I suppose while you don't know, you don't have to deal with it? But desperately wanting to know it hasn't spread, I do know starting chemo two weeks today, hated going in hospital, having to ask where to go, oncology, could feel their pity!! Got took in bad news room, as was crying so much, left with loads of cancer **bleep**! Still I know what I have to do.

Emmajane
Member

Re: Bit confused

J we are going through it together keep hold of that xxxxxxx β€οΈπŸ‘­
Emmajane
Member

Re: Bit confused

J I have days like that. Was hi Friday then low sat... My 4 year old keeps me grounded. Today it's soft play hell πŸ™ˆOncologist tomo and consultant Thursday just wanna get this show on the road!!!!! Hugs back at you lady xxxxxx dare I say chin up πŸ™ˆπŸ˜‚that's a joke BB loves keeping her chin up πŸ˜³πŸ™„πŸ‘ŠπŸ½
Jomo
Member

Re: Bit confused

Well hospital for me today seeing oncologist, I have taken camp in my bed, its the only place I feel safe, good luck again bottyboo, and hug to Emma, we will soon be on other side, the waiting is just the worse, , Emma you and I are in same boat, chemo ,op, radio, jeez, and bottyboo, I want to run away, I just want to wake up, and say that was a site dream, just got to do lunch boxes, daughter needs prom dress, the works is still turning!! Have to say I have had some real self pitying moments! And that is something I despised in people, like yesterday I was looking at people, thinking will my life ever be happy again! Will I be carefree walking round supermarj , again, such a boring thing I took for granted, 

Emmajane
Member

Re: Bit confused

And just got Bottyboo lol Bettyboo!! Years ago I had a bob n my mates called me that!!!!! It's a sign... πŸ™ˆπŸ‘
Emmajane
Member

Re: Bit confused

Sending ooodles of courage, strength and love xxxxx B message when u can πŸ’•
Emmajane
Member

Re: Bit confused

Hehe...!! Xxxxxx poo I can smell it from here!!
Bottyboo
Member

Re: Bit confused

Thank you. It's amazing how even putting it in writing helps. At least the smell wouldn't affect me I'd be asleep lol. When I wake up and they're all looking green I'll know the Brussels worked their magic x
Emmajane
Member

Re: Bit confused

Hehe...!!! Fart all u want xxx What u must do now lady is put ur faith in those caring for u... It's out of ur hands! Let them work miracles and they will. This op is the first step in u becoming u again! XXXX I'm here for u message me xxxxx
Bottyboo
Member

Re: Bit confused

Em I want to run away!!!!! It really has hit home now I'm packing.
I just keep thinking this time tomorrow I'll be on the road to recovery but I've got to get to this time tomorrow. My hubby presented me with a roast chicken dinner but I daren't eat the stuffing and only had two Brussels cos I was scared of the after effects tomorrow πŸ˜„
Bottyboo
Member

Re: Bit confused

I'm 48 which I thought was old but my consultant considers young 😏
Emmajane
Member

Re: Bit confused

Awwwwww deffo xxxxxx how old r u!? Stinky Guinea pigs ooooooo πŸ‘πŸ˜‰
Bottyboo
Member

Re: Bit confused

I was diagnosed on the 19th so only a ten day wait for op. Then the two week torture period for results for next stage of treatment. Suddenly work on a Monday seems like the best thing in the world. Dropped the news to hubby aka eldest child cos he's worse than the three kids put together, that he's got to clean the guinea pigs out for the foreseeable πŸ˜‚ the look on his face was priceless.
Onwards and upwards though. Plenty of time to sit and plan our outings between treatment to terrorise our part of the world!! πŸ™†
Much love and hugs for the appointments this week, at least you'll have a plan of action πŸ‘xx
Emmajane
Member

Re: Bit confused

When were u diagnosed? U can and will beat it the op is the first step in you're journey of recovery!!!!!! I got mine last Monday... And want to get cracking it's the waiting that's killing me xxxxxx sending hundreds of hugs to my mischievous new partner in crime... We r gonna have some fun between treatment lady πŸ™ˆπŸ‘
Bottyboo
Member

Re: Bit confused

Holy crap!!! Just realised my op is tomorrow and all of a sudden it's hit me harder than ever. There's so many unanswered questions. I can't and won't accept that it will beat me. I have to show it who's boss. Even let the cat sleep on the bed tonight lol. It seems there's more going round in my head each minute that passes. Argh!!!!!
Emmajane
Member

Re: Bit confused

Oh I went thru the guilt live but this is about us now and beating this **bleep**!!!! Had a long convo tonite with a friend who's husband survived it and he was riddled! I'm meeting her tomo for coffee she's brill. She knew I was upset n rang n said if i didn't answer she was gonna come n bang my door down. I'm also time of month which has added to today's low. Let's meet up for sure in between our chemo... Ladies that lunch πŸ™ˆπŸ˜‚πŸ‘ŠπŸ½
Bottyboo
Member

Re: Bit confused

My parents are in Barwell, my mum and sister (who has never left home and thinks I'm mad to have my boob reduced) and my dad and wicked step mother live the other end of the village. My grandma who is95 lives in a home in Hinckley but only moved there last June and is giving them hell - go grandma!!! My auntie and uncle live in Desford.
We should definitely meet up I'm only down the A47. I am definitely mischievous lol is there any other way to be? Is your ex helpful? Lucky him having a skiing trip
Can't remember a time when I didn't have this even though it's only a month since I first found it. I'm loving the idea of telling c u Charlie I'm having r and r you've made me see sense cos I was feeling guilty. X
Emmajane
Member

Re: Bit confused

Lump originally they said 2 cm but they think 4-5 is more accurate 😱
Emmajane
Member

Re: Bit confused

Oh u never fail to make me giggle!! I'd love to meet u xxxxx I think we'd be good tonic for each other. I think u may be a bit mischievous like me...?? πŸ™ˆAs for chin up Charlie F her!!!!! Sod the meeting too u have finished now xxxxx r and r for u lady! Where r ur parents? I'm in Fleckney. Yes I think they worry a lot. I'm keen to get the appointments out of the way and then start treating this once n for all!!!!! I'm in a bath with candles. Daddy has returned from skiing so I asked him to take c today instead of tomo.
Bottyboo
Member

Re: Bit confused

Yes the oncologist will discuss the chemo and radiotherapy etc. How big is your lump? I think when you've been busy doing something and then stop like you getting home from some girly days it hits you extra hard. Have a good cry, it's important not to bottle things up. When your little one wakes up do some nice mum/daughter activities. I hate the way this has taken over our lives and minds. The physical side of things is nothing compared to the torment. Chin Up Charlie said to me could I message her any questions to do with the extraordinary governors meeting we have on Wednesday followed by cos I'm not expecting you to be there! (I'm a staff governor) How magnanimous of her!!! How the hell am I supposed to think of questions with all this going on? I can't even remember my name most of the time. And she never even came down at the end of the day to wish me well. So nice to be appreciated.
Are all your family still in Sheffield? Mine are still in Leicester. My mum and dad don't know what to say although I know deep down they're worried sick. My sister doesn't understand why I'm happy to have my boob reduced at the same time and my wicked step mother has become a leading expert. Don't know why I bother going to the hospital, Dr Stepmum will sort it 😠
Emmajane
Member

Re: Bit confused

My little one is sleeping xxxx hence I'm weeping!!
Emmajane
Member

Re: Bit confused

Yes... I have just got home from a couple of days with a friend and my girl and say in floods!!!! Been really upbeat n now right back down. I feel sick with tiredness. Have an appointment with oncology doc not sure what happens is it to discuss treatment and chemo? I have consultant Thursday xxx
Bottyboo
Member

Re: Bit confused

Glenfield is a fab hospital. Flipping men never know what side their bread is buttered! But he may surprise you even if just as a friend x
Emmajane
Member

Re: Bit confused

Glenfield!! Get results on Thursday which will determine treatment but she's said chemo then op. My consultant is very highly talked about which fills me with confidence! Xxx my hearts not in it he's not been there so far lol
Sarahkears73
Member

Re: Bit confused

Hi Emmajane good luck with results Thursday xx

Bottyboo
Member

Re: Bit confused

That's good, you never know, your heart may not be in it now but he may turn out to a fantastic support. I've done my last day with Chin Up Charlie. The rest of the staff that know were amazing. My key stage leader brought down a lovely pocket sized adult colouring book and packet of crayons. I feel strangely calm about it all, in a strange way I want Monday to come so I can start the process of eradicating this evil body lodger. Going to spend the weekend organising the freezer and writing a day to day menu for hubby aka my fourth child.
I've also had my hair cropped short! Our foster cat Bailey (his brother is called Bill -not as us lol) is going to his furever home today and, whilst I'll miss him, he came to us terrified and is now a happy confident mini bear who loves fuss and cuddles. No more fosters for a while πŸ˜• but have enough of our own for now.
Glad you're feeling in control and good luck for the results. Are you at Leicester Royal or Glenfield? Xx
Emmajane
Member

Re: Bit confused

I feel like I have reevaluated everything work used to stress me... Not anymore!!!!! I've also bought a lottery ticket!!!! Got chatting to a teacher in the shop and her job share won lol it's a sign!!!!! πŸ™πŸ»πŸΎ
Emmajane
Member

Re: Bit confused

Yesterday I had a good chat to the guy I've been seeing since July... My hearts not been in it a while we r so different. Oddly the cancer has given me the strength to deal with it. Like a weights been lifted. He says he's there through it all how ever I want him to be... Xx
Emmajane
Member

Re: Bit confused

Aw thanks! Yes it did results Thursday can't wait to get started now. Had my hair cropped short yest!!!!! Felt great!!!!! Xx how r u love?
Bottyboo
Member

Re: Bit confused

Hi Em hope all went well yesterday and will go well today. Thinking of you xx
Emmajane
Member

Re: Bit confused

I'm in Fleckney originally from Sheffield xxx
Bottyboo
Member

Re: Bit confused

Em which part of Leicestershire are you in? I'm originally from Barwell but now live in Peterborough although all my family are still in Barwell Hinckley or Desford. Xx
Sarahkears73
Member

Re: Bit confused

Caribbean sounds fab. We've had Florida booked ages, before all this so I'm so glad I can still go. I love teaching can't wait to get back to do a bit next week!! Will keep everything crossed for good results. It's so helpful to talk to others on here I find xx
Emmajane
Member

Re: Bit confused

Yes I teach year 1! I have another biopsy n bloods Thursday then scan Friday hoping results ASAP want to get attacking this thing that's trying to control my body... πŸ‘ŠπŸ½yes I think in a couple of weeks and like u 3 week intervals. Oooo Florida?! Me n mum going to carribean when I get the all clear πŸ‘πŸ‘­
Sarahkears73
Member

Re: Bit confused

I was told the chemo would be a safety too, at 42 I'm young as well (that bit I like!!) so they blast us with everything. Looks like we may be going through chemo at similar times mine will start April. 6 sessions, 3 weeks apart. Then radiation which I guess you will have after surgery too. Did you say you teach? I'm secondary school. Going back next week for 4 weeks part time, then Florida in Easter hols, then chemo it seems. When do you get results? Xx
Emmajane
Member

Re: Bit confused

Ps I'm totally a control freak!!!!! πŸ™ˆ
Emmajane
Member

Re: Bit confused

Sarah that's making sense my boobs are small b cup and lump 2-4 cm told two different sizes lol!! They said about shrinking it and also stopping it in its tracks as I'm 40 n relatively young for this... Fingers crossed!! Yes I will sleep better chatting to u guys has helped like u will never know! Mum n dad fab n had loads of friends pop in too but it's great to get first hand help and advice on here. Thanks xxxxxx
Sarahkears73
Member

Re: Bit confused

Sounds very relaxing!! My friends sister had chemo before surgery, her lump was big compared to breast size so they shrunk it to avoid mastectomy. My lump only 18mm and I'm an F cup! So small in comparison. It's hard to accept what they say, I'm a bit of a control freak myself! But yes they know such a lot these days about what they are doing. I'm from selby originally live not too far away, pop to Meadowhall with my 13 year old regularly!! We are about 40 mins from there. I'm having a glass of wine with hubby then bed. Hope you sleep better tonight xx
Emmajane
Member

Re: Bit confused

I'm originally from Sheffield! I live in Leicestershire now. I wish they'd remove the lump now want it gone but I have to trust they know what's best xxx 😱 5 months seems an age away I keep worrying what if it spreads further... Why aren't they taking it now???? Is it already that big... πŸ˜”
Emmajane
Member

Re: Bit confused

Thanks so much xxxxx I'm now having a bath with lots of candles. Very relaxing. I feel so well and hard to believe this horrid thing is taking over my body. Well I won't let it!! 😑
Sarahkears73
Member

Re: Bit confused

Hi Em, you will be exhausted all the emotion and information is draining. I'm northern too, Yorkshire and hoping to cold cap. I had surgery first, mine was small, chemo to follow as a safeguard. Not looking forward to it. I've had some advice from the ladies Kim mentions, everyone on here is so helpful. Hope you sleep better tonight xx

Kim555pink
Member

Re: Bit confused

Hi Em! Have just posted in Newly Diagnosed... in reply to another lady who's found herself here. Check out that thread too πŸ™‚
I started chemotherapy in January and decided against cold capping (I'm a southerner - can't bare the cold although I'm living in Shropshire as north as I can cope with temperature wise πŸ˜‰ ) But if you go on the chemotherapy monthly threads (Going through treatment) you will find fellow cold cappers! I'm from the Jan 2016 thread and I know Claire is cold capping there and Tina and Vicky (I think) are cold capping in the Dec 2015 thread. They will be more than happy to give you tips and support - as will we all for anything g you want to know πŸ™‚
Lots of love Kim xxx
Emmajane
Member

Re: Bit confused

Have you heard about the cold cap?? I'm northern n hard so I'm gonna give it a go lol!!!! I live in Leicestershire now tho and having my treatment here xxx focus on the positives... Getting married etc. Me n mum gonna go to the carribean when I get the all clear!!!!!! πŸ‘­πŸ’•
Emmajane
Member

Re: Bit confused

I've been told I have to have 5 months chemo before the lump is removed to shrink it n eliminate any other of that awful stuff that could be growing! The diagnosis was last nite and it's all very new! Today I went in to work on my day off to tell my boss. I was very positive and strong, I've then had 3 lots of visitors my house is like a florists!! I do feel so loved but wiped out tonite n tbh weary of being positive. I didn't sleep much last nite! I'm gonna have a bath n then early nite just snuggles with girlie first. It's so great talking to ppl going through this thanks for replying xxxxxx we will get through this! We have to xxxxxx it's in my nodes too 😑
Sarahkears73
Member

Re: Bit confused

Hi Em, yes that's just how I feel. Was so happy to have the lump out, then worried about results. Devestated at 2 lymph nodes involved and needing more removed, euphoria when the next 21 were clear. Now starting with dread over chemo. I'm the same I absolutely have to be around to see my daughter grow up, get married, have children. It's a terrifying fear that you won't be, other days I feel sure I will. Lots of hugs xx
Emmajane
Member

Re: Bit confused

I read your comment xxxx stay strong lovely
Emmajane
Member

Re: Bit confused

R u feeling up n down??? One minute I feel I can fight the world then now as I'm tired I'm wiped out and feeling low... I gave supportive family n friends tho and a lovely little girl who I'm desperate to c grow up... 😳
Sarahkears73
Member

Re: Bit confused

27 and diagnosed with invasive.....

 

tried to to copy and paste but it won't work! I'm similar age and circumstances to you it seems xx

Emmajane
Member

Re: Bit confused

Which thread Sarah? Xx