Can I join your group please?

[ThePianist]

Thank you for that; I'll worry about something else instead then. lol

[keepmumsane]

I havent had an mri, just ultrasound,  mammagram and a chest Xray as mine was a big 5cm lump. 

Everyone is differant,  cept when they're not 🙂

[JETS]

Hi pianist - I think it also depends on cancer type - I'm lobular and it's very sneaky - didn't show up on mammogram was there on ultrasound but found more with mri .... X but I honestly wouldn't worry about not having one if ur treatment plan is finished - I'm sure they will monitor and would have referred you if they had any concerns x

[13gerbera]

Hi Pianist, wot Rose said 

I only had one because I have very lumpy, dense boobs with more than one suspicious area so I hope that eases your concern.

[Rosemaryanne]

Hi! I had an MRI but only because they wanted to make sure my two lumps were separate with no cancer cells linking them which would have been invisible on ultrasound. If it had been the one distinct area, it wouldn't have been necessary.

Hope this might put your mind at rest? Good question to ask your BCN for certainty, though.

Rose xx

[ThePianist]

Am I the only person who hasn't had an MRI? My treatment plan has finished and I never had an MRI. Should I be worried?

[keepmumsane]

Fair comment I'd say.

In my case,with reference to single mastectomy half-in-half dairy lite...lol!

I thought I wouldnt hear from the oncology department till late january,  but the head nurse was kind enough to ring me early afternoon christmas eve to say I was in his referral pile and not forgotten.  Made me blub in surprise.  He said they are too busy to close,  gave me a mobile number incase I felt panicky. Amazing. 

My surgeon signed me off the week before and having grown to trust him found the loss a bit tough. He had said that I wouldnt hear from anyone till later, but ring my district nurse if I needed anything.

It really is the waiting and not knowing that does your head in...other than the obvious. 

I just love having these threads and you ladies to talk with,  got in a huge ridiculous arguement with my man over what to fill the freezer with for sick days. It wasnt till we'd yelled at each other , sulked, slept on it a bit sheepishly that I realised he wasnt on the same page, hadnt driven himself mad researching everything and was horrified at the thought I might be that fragile... unlike me who was preparing for a human equivalent of a nuclear winter ..lol

Much love, bring on the office hours xxx

Sandie

[13gerbera]

Thanks Sandie, I'm feeling a lot better now I've decided to apologise to her on Monday. My first priority though is to try to get some clear answers to what is happening to me, at the moment I feel like a piece of meat that has been thrown into the NHS machine and I don't know whether I'm going to come out the other end as a sausage or a burger or a veggie alternative!  I suspect it's just that the hospital is a bit out of synch because of the Christmas holidays.

Take care of yourself

x

Sharon

[keepmumsane]

O sharon, its bad enough that the diagnosis throws us out, you've really had a bumpy ride.

I hate how crazy this makes us. Im going to agree with the other ladies who say the radiologist cares and is not holding a grudge. You could post a card, but don't beat yourself up about it. They deal with it every day.

The lady doing my multiple biopsies said it becomes a normal procedure for them and sometimes they forget how stressful it can be for us,  after I pointed out how exposed you feel, with someone waving sharp objects around your armpit. 

Fear makes us all a bit fragile and bonkers, give yourself a bit of room , its not easy which is why we're all leaning on each other. 

As women we run our lives, our families and are the ones in control, this c $#@p disease takes that away,  incrediably hard and really frustrating. Be kind with yourself too. 

Xxx

[13gerbera]

Thanks ladies, I am just so disappointed in myself & I will apologise to her when she does the next biopsy on Monday as it's not her fault.  Just wish I felt a bit more in control, or at least managed to keep it together with the people who are trying to help me. 

Really appreciate your reassurances, thank you!

x

Sharon

[Rosemaryanne]

OK, deeeep breaths!

Firstly, you are going through probably the most terrifying experience of your life. You are also in a pretty fragile place from what you've said of your background.

Secondly, the radiologist will get over this, probably has heard a lot worse.

Thirdly, the incomplete information and sidelong mentions of possibilities of this and that potential problem is not fair on you and no wonder you are stressed beyond endurance.

So, forgive yourself. If I were you I think I probably would phone the radiologist, just because it'd make me feel better, or even just drop the department an email. You don't need to apologise, just explain why you became so upset.She was obviously concerned about you, as she instigated the call from the BCN?

This disease changes us all fundamentally. We go from feeling perfectly well to being informed we havea life-changing illness, with no clear plan of action, stumbling from one set of results to another, via various medical treatments to which we submit because we have to, in the hope that it will all be ok in the end. We feel out of control of our lives and our futures.

So we are entitled to snap every now and again, and people have to allow us to do that. And i think you would find that your radiologist feels utterly dreadful at having caused you to become upset. Maybe she should feel that way, maybe not, but that is not your concern. Your mission is to find out as much as you can about what is happening to you and to deal with that in the best way for you.

I hope some of this makes sense?

Rose xx

[Sue123]

Dear 13gerbera,I do not think you should be ashamed of yourself at all! these waits and poor communication are just intolerable and we just have to vent sometimes particularly given the radiologist's tactless awful comment!

I am sure things will seem better when you get your plan, and sod what they think, you are not over emotional, you have had a life changing diagnosis and I for one cried at almost every appointment.

I was diagnosed a year ago and doing ok now but I remember only too well those early days. Keep posting and all the better if you can get a good relationship going with your BCN which depends on whether you can click with her or not. I adore my BCN but know other women who do not get on with her so well, 

Take care

Suexx

[13gerbera]

Oh ladies, I'm so ashamed of myself! 

Got a call today from the Radiologist who said that following my MRI I needed to go back for a biopsy on another (third) lump in my left breast.  I asked her what the MRI had showed about my right breast and she said she didn't know anything about that and the clinical team should have spoken to me about it, all she was doing was trying to book an appointment for another left breast check.  I burst into tears and started shouting at her as I've tried to get someone to tell me what is going on with the right breast for over a week now but got out of office messages and no one seems to be available to speak to me (I asked about right breast at original checks and was told that it was clear, then a week later when the Consultant was giving me the formal pathology results he mentioned in passing that there was a lump that appeared benign but MRI would pick it up.  He was too rushed to talk to me so I had no idea where it is, what size it is etc)

A BCN called me back an hour or so later and when I explained that the right breast lump had been sprung on me with no details she fished out the MRI report and told me what it said.  I am thoroughly ashamed of having lost it with the Radiographer.  Half of me wants to call her and apologise, the other half wants to carry on sulking (she was the one who said on first examination 'oh well there is definitely something there, still, I bet you're glad as you haven't wasted your time or ours on nothing')

Given how badly I am reacting so far, I dread to think what my next appointment is going to be like.  Am I ever going to stop being an over-emotional baggage or should I just start wearing a big sign round my neck saying 'Danger, do not approach'?

[13gerbera]

Thanks so much for taking the time to respond Sarah, I had read your post about your Christmas Eve and really felt for you, that must have been hard.  I've sort of resigned myself to whatever the Consultant throws at me now in terms of surgery.  Any sort of surgery has got to be better than being told that no surgery will help so whatever it is, I'll cope with it as I'm sure will you and all the other lovely ladies who are having to face this. And I suppose I'd rather they took their time to get the right diagnosis than rushed it and had to go back and take more (although I know that it does sometimes happen that way irrespective of how many tests they do in advance of surgery).  Well, I say that but actually what I really want is for all the tests to be done tomorrow, with me under a general anaesthetic even for the blood tests as I'm so totally feeble about all things medical, with instant results and one-time-only surgery the next day but even I can see that is a bit unreasonable 

I can only wish you well for your surgery and hope that it relieves some of the anxiety you must be facing.  

x

[JETS]

Hi - oh the waiting we do all live this pain - as a pointless fact there is nhs guidance of op in 30 days of diagnosis of BC - but you may find, like me, that there are many tests before the diagnosis - long/short story short - found lump start of November and had first mammogram ( clear) then ultrasound ( not sure ) - biopsy - week later results showed cancer grade 2 but they needed mri to confirm not more hoping for lumpectomy at this point - week later mri - week later called back and masectomy for jan booked - then.... Phones and asked to come back as two radiologists disagreed over my other Breast - referral option to mri biopsy to be agreed but eventually declined and now having double (bi) masectomy on 12 jan .... So they have met the 30 day target with final decision made on xmas eve but it has felt like an eternity of tests - I started this journey pretty naive - even the ultrasound consultant said "we are going it for your peace of mind" - I've learnt to juggle a few "what ifs" as you may find the news you get isn't what h exoect at all etc x you are doing the right thing working out your options in your head! Best of luck love sarah

[13gerbera]

Thanks RosemaryAnne, that is hugely reassuring and I hope you are healing well now (totally get the not wanting to look bit, I had to wait a week before I felt able to look properly at my poor biopsied boob because I'm so squeamish!).  Will cross fingers, toes and all other bendy bits that your pathology results are good so you can move on to the radiotherapy quickly.

I had assumed that surgery would be about 4 weeks after seeing the Consultant for the MRI results but it seems as if it might be a lot sooner judging by your experience so I think I'd better get my skates on and start thinking about what I need to prepare for post-surgery: I'm meeting a friend to hit the sales today so I think I'll look out for one of those big comfy V shaped pillows and a post-surgery bra, any excuse to shop! 

[Rosemaryanne]

Hi! Sorry you're stuck in that awful limbo of waiting. It's so hard to deal with, isn't it?

I'll run my timeframe by you just for info. When I summarise the dates it doesn't seem that bad, but at the time it felt like an eternity.

I had my routine mammogram on 10th Oct, and recall for follow up was on 29th Oct when they did biopsies. First meeting with my consultant was on 18th Nov, confirmed 2 cancerous areas. MRI on 26th Nov, and saw the consultant again on 9th Dec. Pre-op assessment was 11th Dec and had surgery to remove both lumps plus Sentinel Node biopsy and therapeutic mammoplasty on 22nd Dec. Another 4 weeks wait for Pathology, then radiotherapy and 5 years hormone treatment to come, providing lymph nodes and margins are clear. I have to say I feel remarkably well, no pain, just occasional discomfort managed with paracetamol.(Daren't look at the "damage"though, I'll wait till they remove the dressing).

Once I had been given a date for surgery I was almost euphoric, at last a plan was in place and that seems to be pretty general amongst most people I've talked to, which isn't much help to you right now, I know!

Take care of yourself and rest up as much as you can. Sleep isn't easy, but just get your feet up when you can.

Rose x

[13gerbera]

Thanks Boa - it's just me being impatient & a worry-wart again so I'll try harder to be patient

[Boa]

Gerbera, there doesn't seem to be a 'normal' in relation to the format tests and results and treatment plans take. It is frustrating at times but I waited about two weeks before getting the results after an MRI. Hope all goes well for you. Boa

[13gerbera]

Thanks Matty2, if that's the case I guess I'll just wait until they call me back.  Absolutely hating the waiting bit though, more so because I have three friends/colleagues who have had breast cancer and all were given their diagnosis and surgery dates at their first testing sessions so I suppose that seems normal to me.  I'm quickly learning that there isn't really a normal....

Anyway, at least it means I can try to stop thinking about it for another few weeks and just enjoy Christmas & New Year.  Hope you can do the same.

x

[Matty2]

Hi Gerbera

We are all newly diagnosed - November/December

It does seem slow doesn't it. 

Each visit is another test, each test is another week.#

I look on it as a step upon the way to getting rid of it, I have phoned up BCN a couple of times and found I get some sense of why the delay. Sometimes it's just that they have to wait for the test labs to do their jobs first

[Lucy_BCC]

Hi 13gerbera and welcome to the BCC forums

Along with the support you will find on here, our helpliners are back on Monday 29th Dec 9-5 so please feel free to give them a call to talk any concerns or queries through on 0808 800 6000

Here's a link to the BCC 'Just diagnosed' information and further support ideas which I hope you will find helpful:

https://www.breastcancercare.org.uk/diagnosis

Take care
Lucy BCC

[13gerbera]

Evening all, d'you mind if I join you please? 

I've just turned 50 and am single, living alone. I left work a year ago as my Mum died and my Dad needed a bit of support so I decided to take the year off to help him settle and to give myself a bit of a break too (had a hard few years).  I was planning on finding a new job after Christmas as my savings are running out soon. Best laid plans and all that...

I found a lump on 23rd November, had mammogram, ultrasound & biopsies on 4th December and was told it was almost certainly cancer and invasive ductal cancer was confirmed by pathology reports on 11th December.  Although it looks as if it is just one lump that is the problem at the moment (axillary and one other lump showed no malignant cells) my consultant asked for an MRI scan too as he said my breasts were complex and the cancerous lump is hidden behind a much larger non-cancerous lump.  In fact it seems my boobs look a lot like lumpy porridge so it's hard to see exactly what is going on 

The bit that is worrying me at the moment is the delay in getting the diagnosis sorted out.  The Consultant said that I should have the MRI within a week to 10 days of diagnosis but the appointment I was originally given was more than six weeks away so I had to jump up and down to get it brought forward and really hated feeling like I was being a nuisance.  My BCN said she would arrange for me to see the Consultant again once the MRI results were through but I emailed her today (MRI was done on Friday in the end) and got an out-of-office saying she wouldn't be back until 5 January and as my Consultant's clinic seems to be Thursdays only and Christmas Day and New Year day knock out the next two, it seems I'll have to wait another fortnight before I get the results.  I understand that if any of the other lumps look troublesome from the MRI I might have to have more biopsies.  So, at this rate it will be two months post-diagnosis before I can get a treatment plan even if I don't need more biopsies, which seems inordinately long to me.  Is this usual in your experience or should I be pushing to speed things up? The last thing I want to do is to antagonise my medical team and I do appreciate that they are entitled to Christmas/New Year holidays too but I don't want to just sit back and do nothing if I should be chasing it up.  

Thanks for any and all help

13Gerbera