Cancer & Tamoxifen

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Diagnosed with cancer for second time (first time 10 yrs ago: lumpectomy) and only discharged from clinic last November as clear.  This time the breast cancer was a lot bigger and much more serious and fast growing.  At first it was suggested that I could be treated with Letrozole but after the surgery it was decided I needed chemo.  I am terrified if losing my hair amongst all the other side effects and yes, I know that sounds very vain but I do really dread it.  After seeing the oncologist she gave me Tamoxifen until I gave her my decision about chemo.  I only took it for three days in total but within hours of the first tablet I had the most awful side effects so by the third day I was told by the breast clinic to stop it immediately and then contact the oncologist. I did as advised and am now awaiting an appointment for chemo to begin.

 

I knew for three weeks that I had a recurrence before I told my husband/family and managed to keep it all ‘under my hat’ so to speak but after seeing the breast surgeon and her detailed verdict on the operation results my whole world fell apart.  I couldn’t believe it, as with the first cancer I maintained a very high standard of self control.  I am still finding it difficult to keep in contact with people other than my husband as I tend to fold up into floods of tears and cannot even hold a conversation.  Heaven only knows how I will cope with the chemo side effects.   I am 74 so I suppose I have had a reasonable innings as you miight say.

 

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Dear forus5

Welcome to the BCC Forum where I hope you will find lots of support from fellow members.

It might also help to phone our Helpline to talk things over.  They will be able to offer you information and support.  The opening times are 9-5 on weekdays and 10-2 on Saturdays.  The number is 0808 800 6000

Very best wishes

Janet

BCC Moderator

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First of all, you will cope with the chemo side effects, its really not as bad as everyone says it is (those people who say that usually haven’t had it in my experience), and secondly I think personally it is immaterial whether you are 74 or 44.  Who’s to say we all won’t be still kicking when we are 94!!  I certainly intend to be and I was only 42 when I was diagnosed 4 years ago.

 

I can understand you may not want to tell the world - I really didn’t care who knew I had cancer, the problem I couldn’t be bothered dealing with was how “everyone else” felt, everyone seemed to have an opinion as to how it was affecting them.  As I ranted to them I didn’t care how they felt, I was the one with cancer, not them.

 

You need to lean on your husband though as he is going through it with you, mind was absolutely fab, he looked after me single handed and still managed to go to work most of the time.

 

As to the side effects, my onc told me that the only thing she couldn’t control was hair loss and tiredness, everything else she had a remedy for.  And she was right, I had enough anti-sickness so  that I never felt sick, and anything else that came along she dealt with.

 

The hair loss never bothered me one jot, I didn’t bother with cold cap (this is an option to try if you really can’t face losing your hair), I didn’t bother with a wig and so I became a dab hand with scarf tying.

I didn’t find this forum until I had finished active treatment, but you will find support if you join one of the monthly chemo threads as it is a good way to touch base, so to speak, with others that are going through the same as you at the same time.

 

I would also say that don’t worry about keeping in contact with other people, I was quite selfish I admit it, if I didn’t want to come to the phone my husband would say I was sleeping or even that I didn’t want to talk to anyone.  If they are true friends they won’t mind and if they do mind, do you know what, they aren’t worth keeping in touch with.

 

The only people you need to talk to and take notice of are your medical team and your husband and with their help you will come out of the other side.  In the whole scheme of things it is such a short period of time.

 

Take care