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Chances of secondaries

7 REPLIES 7

Re: Chances of secondaries

Hi lovely Emma, 

 

sounds as if you are in a really good position for it not to return... and as everyone has said...just go and live each day with the info the doctors have told you!  

 

If it helps I was told 16 years ago, it would be back within two years as I wasnt in your position! However, it was around 11, so I did waste  a bit of time worrying.  Now, I travel hopefully myself! Even with mets. 

 

Try and forget us...but if you cant, come back again for a chat.( or another kick in the pants!) xx

 

very best wishes for your continuing good health🍷

 

Moijanxx

Re: Chances of secondaries

I just wanted to add something from the view of someone who hasn't had the cancer but worried like this about my mum.
My mum had primary breast cancer, prognosis wasn't the best at first as it was big, but then as it was only in two nodes, they said she was in good position.
Now I am a worrier with a capital W! But I (and my mum) had to hope for the best. We somehow learnt to accept it wasn't coming back, unless told otherwise. It was always on the back of our minds though, but we convinced ourselves it may be ok.
Mums cancer retuned and she passed within 6 weeks (this is rare - mums had become triple negative and v aggressive)It was much more complicated than two nodes though (they removed wrong nodes etc).

However what I want to say is - trusting that she would be ok was the best thing we did. We could've worried non stop, or we could enjoy life and do more things 'just in case'. We did the latter and I am so pleased we did that and didn't let it rule our life.
Again I am a mega worrier but I learnt not to let it rule me, until I had to.

I truly hope you never have to cope with the return. I also wish all the rest of you the best with your treatment.
Xx

Re: Chances of secondaries

Emma, just want to echo what everyone else has said. The main thing is you are aware of the possibility but shouldnt have been through stumbling across a forum..it should be done by medical teams and this is what needs to change. to be totally honest it will always be at the back of your mind.....but for now and hopefully for good, leave it there and enjoy your life. Good luck. x

Re: Chances of secondaries

I agree with all the advice that's already been given. I'd also add the following:

 

  • more people don't develop secondaries than do
  • the science has moved on considerably since a lot of us were first diagnosed (my primary dx was 2003)
  • I only took tamoxifen for five years - it is now recognised there is less chance of developing secondaries by staying on it longer
  • don't let what might or might not happen in the future spoil today - take this as a wake up call to make the most of every minute, spend as much time as possible with loved ones and let them know how much they mean to you

 

nicky08
Community Champion

Re: Chances of secondaries

Great advice ladies! My advice to friends who have had primary BC is get on with things, don't think about the what ifs. It may not happen (percentage wise that is true) and if it does we are living proof that life doesn't end there. The only annoying thing about this is that primary ladies are still not being told the facts about breast cancer, whereas if they were, there might not be this shock that Emma has had when she read that it can come back. 

Nicky x

Re: Chances of secondaries

Emma, I agree with Carolyn! Get out if here!!! You are smart to realize it can come back, just like any other cancer! We will welcome  you if it does!!!! For now you need to move forward and not scare yourself! I will nit lie to you, you never know when I  could. Some lady's find out with their first diagnosis that it has already spread. There is woman that it has taken 30 years to spread. Mine came back after 10 years and set up camp in my lungs! I've been here for 11 years since it was found in my lungs, so if yours would please realize that you could live many years with it. Stay smart, go for check-ups and report and investigate anything you are concerned with. Best of luck!!! Hope you never need us! FF 

Re: Chances of secondaries

Oh Emma

Try not to worry about secondaries as you are having the very best treatment at the moment with herceptin etc. The survival rates are so much better now with better scans and treatments.

We are very pleased to say hello but in your best interest ... stay away from these boards as you will panic yourself over something that may never happen !!!!

 

Now go off and enjoy your Xmas and forget all about us here !!!

 

Hugs Carolyn xxx 

Chances of secondaries

I've just had chemo and op for a primary (ER+ and Her2+) and will have radiotherapy soon. I am having herceptin injections til next year and will start tamoxifen with radiotherapy. .... I've been told I'll be on it for 10 years. I've been told my prognosis is very good. I felt good about this .....THEN I stumbled on this 'living with secondary breast cancer' forum by accident! I just assumed once treatment was completed and they said I had great prognosis I was out the woods ...
Now I keep thinking it's going to spread! What are the chances and how soon is it likely!? I'm mortified I wasn't told anything at hospital about secondary cancer and chances of it happening. WILL it happen to me ....and is it game over when it happens?