Hi Nikster, sorry to hear of your diagnosis and welcome to our exclusive club. Your feelings are very normal, I felt exactly the same about the cancer spreading everywhere and I think it's because suddenly you feel totally out of control so your mind spirals out of control as a result. My curiosity took me into the depths of Google many times (and still does - but don't tell anyone I said that). I think understanding more can help but can also increase anxiety as you create more scenarios for yourself and then your mind does this wonderful job of picking the worst one for you. Thankfully, it does get easier once your treatment gets started and you feel as if control is being taken back. I'm 48 and was diagnosed with stage 2 invasive, locally advanced BC including local nodes. I have just started round 1 of 8 chemo treatments to clean the diffuse margins, shrink the tumour and clear the lymph nodes before surgery. It has been much easier than I thought. Take care and try and focus on getting yourself nice and healthy ready for treatment. I read a lot on nutrition which was a good distraction and coming on here helps with mental isolation. Xx
Hello welcome, although it is not a place any of us would want to be.
There is a lot that you are having to take in at the moment so there is going to be a lot of fear which your rational head is processing but then the anxiety takes over and that goes out of the window.
I would suggest take a deep breath and move forward with small milestones for now the first being your mastectomy.
This is a new thing for all of us but you will get through it. At the moment it is fear of the unknown and it is quite natural to worry that it has spread but conversely there is nothing to say that it has.
Sending you a hug