Firstly welcome to the Breast Cancer Care discussion forums, I hope you will find them to be a great source of support and information.
I’m sorry to read that you are having a such a tough time at the moment. I’m sure some of the other users of this site will be along to offer you their support soon.
In the meantime maybe it would help to talk things through with a member of our helpline staff who are there to offer emotional support as well as practical information. The free phone number is 0808 800 6000 and the lines are open Monday to Friday 9.00 to 5.00 and Saturday 10.00 to 2.00.
Best wishes Sam, BCC Facilitator