At the start of December my partner found a lump in my breast. I can’t fault my GP who having advised me to return to her in a fortnight if it hadn’t gone referred mt to the breast clinic immediately. I had the ultrasound and mammogram just before Christmas and on the day was told that it was normal beat tissue and that as I’m in my early forties, my breasts are starting to change (heading southwards :-(). They gave me a FNA as a matter of course and to confirm that all is well , but this has come back with atypical cells - rated a ‘4’ - which I know is better than a ‘5’ but nevertheless has scared me.
I had my core biopsy on New Years eve (and addittional mammogram) and get my results tomorrow and to be quite frank I’m really scared about what they are going to say. My partner is a scientist and does cancer research so he is a wreck - he’s trying to be supportive but I feel like I am wasting energy worrying about him when I should be concentrating on myself - I know that sounds selfish, but I’m really scared and don’t want the extra stress of worrying about him as well as me. I seem to veer between panic and calm and i’m trying to keep up the facade of normality at work when in reality I look around at all the other women going about their daily routine without a care in the world and yet here I am, my life could change for ever tomorrow.
has anyone got a similar story that make me feel a bit better about tomorrow?
Welcome to the Breast Cancer Care discussion forums, you’ve come to the right place for some good, honest support from the many informed users of this site.
While you are waiting for replies could I suggest that you give our helpline team a call and have a chat with them about your concerns. Calls to the helpline are free, 0808 800 6000 lines open Mon-Fri 9-5 and Sat 10-2
It’s horrible, the waiting part… Trust me, you’re at the hardest stage right now; waiting for the results. I cannot say what your likely outcome is, but I’m pretty certain that once you know what you’re dealing with, you will feel better about it, even if it’s not good news.
Waiting makes you feel as though you’re not in control of your own situation. Once you have the knowledge go what is going on, you regain some control.
As for your partner, it’s a real shame that he can’t support you as you need him to at the moment. Perhaps because he works for Cancer Research, he’s aware of all kinds of cancers and outcomes.
One thing to note for your own peace of mind is that, whatever your results show, breast cancer is nearly always very treatable with a good prognosis.
In my case, I went through a complete whirlwind! I won’t go into all the details here, as I could be here all day! But, trust me… Once you know and understand what you are dealing with, along with any treatment plan that’s proposed, you will feel a whole lot better.
I have everything crossed for you. Hope all goes well. If you want to discuss any further, or need a shoulder, please feel free to message me.
We have been on a similar path over the xmas break and I completely understand how you feel.
I didn’t tell my husband as we had separated but when I did, he colapsed too, offered all the support in the world and then went funny on me by withdrawing agian. I wound up with severe depression and he has now moved back in and is being very supportive. It just took him some time to get to where I was but you are right you have to look after yourself and your own feelings first.
I went through everything you have described, ups and downs etc. also had lumps that were FNAd and came back fine but they found something else which I am waiting on the results for and have been since two days before Christmas. In the meantime, I have also had a brain and cervix MRI for which I have yet more waiting (the lump was supposed to be a minor inconvenience compared to what else they think is wrong with me).
Waiting is so hard. So hard and when you are also having to deal with others emotions too it is just not healthy for us. Give your partner time to do whatever he needs to and focus on yourself.
This website is brilliant for emotional support. There are some amazing people who will no doubt be along with invaluable advice for you. I have been told time and time again that most findings are benign and I have had to keep reminding myself of this until I know otherwise.
many thanks for your kind words, it’s reassuring to know that there is this great support network. I hope that we all receive the news we are hoping for. My partner is being as supportive as he can, but we all have different coping strategies; I know that I am very lucky to have him in my life.
Had my results yesterday - not the news I was hoping for but not as bad as it could have been (apparently) - grade 2 infiltrating duct carcinoma / oetrogen and progesterone positive - the Her2 result will follow. Surrounding tisue is also showing signs of being pre-cancerous
Can’t fault Worcester Hospital, consultant was very good and my partner was fantastic; taking control of the situation as I was a bit shell-shocked to be honest. He asked about clinical trials / statistics / prognosis etc and referred to various publications - it was reassuring that he has read upon the subject.
Anyhoo, pre-op on Monday, in on Wednesday for some radioactive stuff (technical term!) to be injected and the operation on Thursday - i will have a wire inserted in the morning (to help find the lump?) and the operation in the afternoon to remove the lump and appropriate lymph node. Radiotherapy to follow and 5+ years of tamoxifen - no doubt similiar/familiar to many on here. I had to laugh at the blue dye that gives you a temporay smurf-look. The consultant has said that there a number of trials ongoing regarding the radiotherapy but I expect it will depend on what they remove next week
I’m really sorry it’s not good news… You are in good company on here and will get support as and when you need it. It sounds like your partner really stepped up to the mark in your hour of need!! He really contributed positively for you.
It’s horrible to get bad news, but at least you know what you’re dealing with now, which somehow gives us all the strength to get on with it.
Just to note; with the radio-active injection, you don’t always need the blue dye as well. It depends on whether the injection works well enough on its own to locate the sentinel lymph node(s). A tip; when you get the injection, massage the area well for about five minutes every twenty minutes or so until you go back in for the x-Ray. This helps to spread the stuff around and latch onto the lymph node(s). I didn’t need the blue dye after doing this.
Apparently, the dye can make your breast and nipple blue for quite some time, and you have a grey tinge to your skin overall for a day or two, so don’t be alarmed if that happens.
The wire is to help locate the lump and a good clear margin around it. I didn’t end up with one, as my MRI showed four tumours in the end, so I went from a lumpectomy to a mastectomy in one felled swoop! That was a big shock for me, so I have a good idea of how you’re feeling.
It will get easier… Once everything gets underway, you’ll find yourself going with the flow. Make sure you take time out to relax when you can etc. I got my hair done the day before my surgery to give myself a little treat! Silly, but it helped me!
Best of luck to you. I hope all goes well. As I said, keep posting whenever you need that bit of extra support. You’ll definitely find it here. Everything is crossed for you. Mel. xxx
Im going for my first hospital appointment on wednesday and they will be doing a core biopsy as they did 4 years ago when I was diagnosed with a fibroadenoma. But this lump doesnt move around and no obvious ‘edge’ to it. This is what worries me to be honest. If its not that and not a cyst then what else can it be? I hope your results turn out to be nothing to worry about and I understand what u mean by stressing about others. I havent told my parents or my husband yet. As I really dont want to stress them unless it is cancer.My hubbys abroad and parents are elderly. Fingers crossed our results our fine!