Thanks guys. Clear margins reported today, which is a relief, but I am not sure it is completely straightforward, and I am going in tomorrow to see the doctor for the rest of the histology report and further treatment plan if required.
Hi Tigony, glad all went ok and you are recovering well at home. That's the first bit done, one step closer to being rid of it! Michelle xx
Great to hear that you are through surgery, at home and doing well. Make sure you get plenty of rest though. Onwards and upwards.
Through surgery and recovering at home. It was a bit full on, but fine and I am much happier today. I have written a full account on the surgery thread in case it is useful to anyone else. The lack of pain is a great bonus although I was plagued with a dehydration headache due to delays. Very very grateful to all at the hospital. What wonderful people.
Good luck fir Tuesday, Tigony. You are having an awful lot to deal with at the moment. I'll be thinking if you. X
I was put in touch with a lady for a chat on the phone who had something very similar 2 years ago. Very helpful, as are all of you. The sooner this thing is out of my body the better. So am just trying to be calm and productive, although I do feel tired. Again withdrawal from HRT I think. Thanks again to all of you.
Thank you lovely Helena. I think I am probably suffering some depression symptoms due to rapid withdrawal from HRT. It feels very real though when they take possession of one's head. I have learned to let feelings pass through me, and write them out of me as much as possible. Thank you for your lovely words. On we go...
You are not and will never be a failure, just look at the beautiful children you have brought up, they are so obviously a credit and that is because of you.
Good luck for Tuesday, let us know how you get on, we will all be thinking of you and virtually holding your hand.
Last night I gave a birthday dinner for my adult daughter and her friends, plus my two sons. The two older kids know what I am going through, and just trust me and are normal and cheerful thank goodness. I have not told my 16 year old youngest, but last night he came into my bedroom and said such adorable things to me (mostly concerning what he thought of my ex for how much he hurt me, and how strong I am, and apologising for being horrible sometimes etc) that I struggled not to cry. I am hoping that a good result on Tuesday will mean I can tell him and it will be reassuring rather than scary. I have been feeling such a failure recently (mood swings probably caused by coming abruptly off HRT) and so miserable, but youngest's kind words really bucked me up. I looked at my boy, who I brought up largely by myself (with very unhelpful interventions from ex) and am so proud of him. I can't be a failure really if I am loved by such fine young people. Lumpectomy on Tuesday. It feels like a horizon. Things to do before then though like make sure I have a clean house to come back to!
There is an extraordinary sense of relief this morning. While I was worrying about what I would say to a new employer about having to take time off (I am a contractor and lost my last contract just before Christmas without warning, which was very stressful on top of breast worries) I had an underlying feeling of panic. When people kept saying, 'You must look after yourself,' it just felt like another onerous task. My mind was scattered as I tried to cope with several different areas of panic at once (divorcing my nightmare ex, youngest's GCSEs, running out of money, new job challenges, letting everyone down, never mind my health...). I felt my short term memory getting dicky, and actually got lost in the hospital as I couldn't remember the way out. This loan from my aunt has relieved all that. I am no longer scared of everything, and am thinking of nice things to do to distract myself, instead of thinking of applying for jobs. There are two possible jobs in the offing, and I will respond to those, but being more relaxed I am more likely to get one. Honestly I have had a lot of interviews recently, and it has been such an effort concentrating. I must have come across very poorly I think, even if I did put on what my other lovely aunt called, 'Dr Greasepaint'. Anyway, thank you all of you as ever for commenting. x
You do have one amazing aunt there, and as the others have said you can now totally concentrate on you getting over your op and getting better
That must be such a relief for you, now you can concentrate on your health and getting through your treatment without the additional stress of worrying about money, what a lovely aunty you have!! Michelle xx
Today i went for my pre op tests, and I am so healthy for my age thank goodness. Also very grateful today because my aunt, who is 90 and had cancer 30 years ago, has loaned me some money to tide me over so I am not job hunting while I go through surgery etc. I am so grateful and relieved as I was worried sick about letting my youngest down, who is wholly supported by me, and how I was going to pay the lawyer for divorce. Now that anxiety is relieved and I can concentrate on myself for a change. It has been a huge worry, the idea of breaking down and not being able to do my usual juggling act, and youngest suffering as a result. Phew! What a darling aunt I have.
Dear Maria, thank you so very much for sharing your experience. It is such a help. I have my hospital assessment on Weds and my op on 14 March. I am in the middle of getting new work, so worried about missing days when I could be earning, so this is enormously helpful. Best wishes
Tigony, good luck with it all. I am two years on from the same diagnosis. Surgery was fine; I had about 5 days off. Unfortunately didn't get clear margins so they had a second go. Radiotherapy was really positive. I worked all the way through and my hospital did 5 weeks for DCIS. THey sorted all my appointments for between 8:30 and 8:50 so no one at work, that I didn't choose to tell, noticed.
It's a weird time. DCIS is curable. It's positive that it's caught now. Even so, it feels like your body's turned gangster on you.
Everyone i I encountered in my treatment was great. Kind, doing their best, and I'm very grateful. I feel lucky today but it was scary back then. Big hugs x
It is annoying that this is coinciding with an unsettled work and life situation, but I will listen to your advice about two weeks recovery after surgery. I am also chivvying my lawyer to get my divorce finalised so I get paid back a proportion of the money I am owed which will give me more leaway. That is the tiresome stress in the background. I will block out two weeks post 14 March, and hope that it doesn't affect my ability to earn too much. Best wishes and many thanks to all of you for your kind and generous advice.
Hi Tigony, I agree with Jill, 2 weeks is a reasonable recovery time after surgery and this is what my surgeon advised. My second surgery was 15th March and I started rads on about the 11th May and had sessions Mon-Fri for 4 weeks. 1 year on I do feel really well but I will say that I think I am still healing from all the treatment. I can't stretch quite as much on my right side as it sort of pulls in my arm pit (I did have some nodes removed) and my chest area also feels tender on that side when I press it. The area where I had the surgery is still a little numb and I do still get twinges which I believe are the nerve endings still repairing. None of this has affected my day to day ability to do things and its not actually painful, just a little uncomfortable at times. I have been very lucky and managed to get through it all without any problems. Even managed a holiday in the sun 6 weeks after finishing rads (did cover my chest in factor 50 though just to be on the safe side!). Everyone recovers at a different pace so just listen to your body and take it easy to allow yourself to heal. I'm so glad you finally have a date for surgery, it makes a difference to finally get started with treatment doesn't it. Keep us all posted as to how things are going. Michelle xx
One of the most helpful things is knowing that there is a bit of a delay before the radio. I am assuming a week off will be enough for healing after surgery, as the vacuum biopsy only took about 5 days to heal? I have to get back to work as I am a contractor.
Hi Michelle, I was booked in today to surgery on 14 March, so just within the month since diagnosis, which I think is very quick. Treatment after that will depend on results of the first thing. I have had a few mood plunges, but I am mostly ok. Been focusing on getting a job really and planning my daughter's birthday party the weekend before the op. Thank you for all info, I really appreciate it. I do hope also you are feeling well now, a year later.
That is a lot of stuff to go through, and I wish you all the best, and your family with the move too. I have no wisdom yet as I am still waiting. x
What a positive pragmatic post. Your positivity will get you through all this and out the other end. I was diagnosed in Sept 16, op Oct 16, and I finished rads in Jan this year. Sometimes it feels like it was just a dream but I am certainly very grateful to my wonderful breast care team and the ladies on here who got me through this, I am now moving on and yes it does change you and your perspective on life, but for the better I believe.
Hi Tigony, I was diagnosed on 11th Feb and had my 1st surgery on 1st March (1 year ago today!) so you should expect to be getting your surgery date arranged quite soon I would think. Mine was arranged on the day I was diagnosed. My surgeon gave me my diagnosis and after telling me what they planned to do (surgery, rads, Tamoxifen, possibly chemo depening on any node involvement), she checked her calendar to see when she could fit me in. I guess each hospital has it's own procedures. When is your next appointment? Michelle xx
Hi everyone, I have just joined this site, having been diagnosed late January whilst living overseas. I found a lump, had my annual mammo and sure enough there it was. I was living in North Cyprus at the time so went to Istanbul for my lumpectomy and node removal (19) on 6 Feb. Thankfully, only one node, the Sentinel was cancerous so I returned to UK on 15 Feb whilst my family sort out the house, dogs etc to move back.
Where I am at the moment. I have seen the General Surgeon who is happy with the surgery site and my range of movement. I did have an infection in the drain site and was on 2000mg of antibiotics for 7 days but that is all sorted now.
I see the breast care cancer nurse this afternoon so she can advise me on what to expect. I am also hoping she has the date for my CT scan. I have been told I can expect to see the Oncologist 1-2 weeks and start chemo then radiotherapy 2-4 weeks. I sit waiting to be told where to go and when but I am totally positive about it. Life will get worse before it gets better but that's just the way it is. God willing, I will come out the other end a better person for my experience (could have done without it but there you go). To everyone going through cancer.....stay positive..........together we can beat it. Thanks
Dear Michelle, it is very helpful to hear your timing as I have no idea and still have not been given a treatment plan. Thank you!
She sounds worse than the doc, he was just gloomy and ridiculous instead of being upbeat and informational, which is what we need. I am so pleased to hear from you, thank you for taking the time. I have another appointment on Wednesday next week, and I don't know what this one is for, so am trying to get through on the phone to find out. Will report back.
Hi Tigony-What you wroteabout the delivery of your diagnosis certainly resonated with me but I'm glad to see you've received so much reassurance from the ladies here. After a very gruelling day at the hosp where they kept re-calling me for more tests, I saw a Nurse Practitioner, who gave the impression she enjoyed telling me the news. I got such a shock, no family history whatsoever etc. Even I knew it couldn't be a conclusive diagnosis until the biopsy results were back but all my references to a definitive diagnosis were met with complete coldness even when I burst into tears, protesting that no way would I have an mx! I was very unfamiliar with BC treatments. Interestingly enough, when she wrote to the GP (copy to me) she wrote how I had another hosp app where my 'definitive diagnosis' would be revealed when biopsy results were in. I actually complained about her later.
I had a terrible weekend, didn't want to tell relatives or friends until the biopsy results and even found myself at one point even thinking about planning my funeral LOL. Sounds hilarious now but at the time it was awful. You made me laught when you wrote about behaving in a reckless manner! That's how I felt. In the end I gave in and told my SIL who didn't bat an eyelid! Told me about all the ladies she knew who were doing very well in the face of BC. It helped a lot. It was an entirely different matter when I went back to see the Surgeon and my own assigned BCN who was much more positive.
As others said, once you've been given a treatment plan and things are clearer, you'll feel so much better. I know I did. Keep posting and let us know how you're doing.
Dear Mini, I too have only just arrived here and I really feel for you. You are very welcome and I wish you all the best. No wisdom to offer yet, but the other ladies are amazing.
Good morning everyone,
new to this forum. Yesterday i was told my breast lump was cancerous.. Just sat there in disbelief.
back for another biopsy next monday to test another part of my left breast.
surgeon week after who will then have newest results n tell me if its gonna be a wide cut incision or mastectomy.... Hasnt all sunk in yet....
So, a week after the doctor's utter gloom, I was finally rung by the breast nurse who was upbeat and encouraging and made me feel so much better that I was able to tell my two older children. They were fine with it, and I am glad I did. No date yet for surgery, but I found I could just get on with my life without thinking about it too much.
No date for surgery yet, but an immensely cheering chat with the breast nurse, who reassured me and made me feel much better. The doctor really gave me a very poor experience, and he should have known better. Looking gloomy and saying sorry over and over again was not going to help at all!
The waiting for this result or that result was really hard, I had every worse case scenario running through my head and, like a lot of the ladies in the early stages of diagnosis, I was sure it had spread. I just tried to keep positive and had up days along with lots of down days. But it was all treated fairly quickly - from the biopsy on 4th Feb, to the last radiotherapy session on 9th June (the dates of all the different parts of my cancer journey are etched in my memory) so 4 months in all. Lucky for me though, I wasn't going through a divorce at the same time.... Hope you have some good friends around you to give you lots of support. Michelle xx
I keep coming back to your message as it is such a help. Waiting for something to happen is annoying, but I am trying to distract myself and keep cheerful. And chivvy my blooming ultra slow lawyer to get me divorced so I stop worrying about money so much.
Thank you so much. It means a great deal. Just spoke to my aunt who is 90, and had colon cancer many years ago, and she was a great comfort too. My siblings are just a bit odd! I am not going to burden them with unwanted information about me. You ladies on here are my current source of pops of hope. x
I wrote a post a little while ago but made some changes to spellings and it does not appear to have posted at all so I will try again.
My cancer was foind as a result of a routine mammogram, I did feel a lump or anything. I have had my op, took 6 weeks off because my boss made me, then went back to work on reduced hours, I worked throughout my rads and last week went back on my normal hours.
I remember when I was told, it initially felt as if my world had fallen apart, then I thought right this is treatable they have told me that and that the outlook is good so I need to get on with it, I set myself milestones, small ones, along my journey. Yes, I had many wobbly moments along the way and without the support of the lovely ladies and here and my very special friends I would not have got through this.
Perhaps your sibilings are struggling with their investigations and what they may be told, with you going through what you are they do not want to burden you with more.
You will very soon be able to give support and help to those ladies who are coming on here after you. That is one thing I was adament about that I wanted to give back at least some of the support, help and love that I have received on this forum since I joined in November last year.
Sending you a special Helena huggle xxxx
I have read your post and just wanted to aid my support to you at this time.
Perhaps your siblings are struggling to cope with what they are going through and the potential outcome of their investigations that they are scared to talk about it with you because they are do not want to burden you with what you are going through already. Everybody reacts differently in these situations.
My cancer was found as a result of a routine 3 yearly mammogram, I had not idea. It was a massive shock and whilst I immediately thought Iam going to beat this, I had many very uncertain moments and have had along the way and if it wasnt for the ladies on here and some very speciai friends I would not have got this far.
This is the worst time waiting for your results and treatment plan. Once you have these everything will feel that much better, I was "right this is doable lets get on with it". I had 6 weeks off after my op only because my bosses made me, I then went back to work on reduced hours, worked through my rads and started back to my normal working hours last week. Everyone is different but to me these were very important milestones, small ones, that I set myself along the way, to enable me to get back to "normal", although that is a different normal now.
One thing I will say and promise you it will happen, you will be able to support the ladies coming on here after you along their journey, that is something I have prided myself in being able to do because I am giving something back to a wonderful forum and people who have been there since I joined in November,
Sending you special Helena huggles xxx
Oh Tigony, we have all been exactly where you are so we understand totally how you feel. A year ago I had just received my diagnosis and my world just fell apart, it was such a shock. I only told those closest to me and had to tell my closest co-workers too, one of whom is a "hugger" so I had to tell her that I didn't need hugs, just everyone to carry on as normal. I bumped into a friend whilst out shopping who had heard I was ill (the good old grapevine was buzzing!) and when she asked how I was doing I just burst into tears, And I did that a lot! But as things started moving and I had my surgery to remove the lump, then a re-excision (due to unclear margins because of an area of dcis), then 20 radiotherapy sessions and finally Tamoxifen for the next however many years, I am now at the end of that particular journey and my life is "normal" again. 2 weeks ago I had my first annual check which was all ok. You will get there and be dishing out advice based on your own experience to others with questions in no time at all, I promise!
Incidentally, your comment about siblings not being in touch struck a chord with me as one of my closest friends only contacted me twice during all my treatment which at the time felt a little hurtful especially as friends of friends were sending lots of messages, I guess people just don't know what to do or say when faced with something as serious as cancer.
There will be light at the end of the tunnel before you know it, you just can't see it yet!
Take care. Michelle xx