Hi,
My name is Claire, I’m 30 years old and I was diagnosed with invasive ductal BC on Monday, yesterday I was told that it has also spread into my lymph nodes and I am now awaiting a ct and bone scan for sometime between christmas and new year. There is no family history of BC. I have three children 12, 9 and 5 - we have decided (for obvious reasons) to wait until after christmas to tell them, I’m sooo worried about them. My middle child was diagnosed with autism in June and I have no idea how to approach the situation…
I am generally a very positive person and I had taken this diagnosis on the chin and been very up beat about it but since yesterdays lymph biopsy results I have been convinced that the cancer has spread further into my body, every ache and pain has me racked with worry, I can’t talk about it with hubby as I don’t want to worry him any more than he already is and generally just dont want to spoil everyone’s christmas…
Claire x
Hi Claire
This must seem such horrible news on top of christmas for you and your family…i was diagnosed with the same as you on 25th October… no lymph nodes affected…please try if you can to talk to your hubby as he is probably beside himself with worry… also call the helpline on here… they are a godsend to reassure your fears…i never thought I would call them as Im a positive person also but when something like this happens it just floors you… this forum has some amazing women and men on here and I know they will be along to support and give some great advice… they kept me going … the waiting is the worst part… as my breast nurse said to me… " you are number one now"… time to take care of yourself… everyone else can wait on the sidelines …christmas is going to be an emotional time for you but I see you have 3 little ones… and I know you will make sure its just perfect for them… but please take some time out for yourself to process the news… sending you huge hugs hun as it still seems only like yesterday I was in the same place as you xx
Hi Claire
You are in the very worse place now, the waiting room is the pits. Have you had surgery yet? Do you know what your treatment plan is? I was diagnosed in January and finished treatment in September, I have a 5 year old daughter and we did our best to keep things as normal as possible for her at every opportunity, we only told her the basics - mummy has a poorly booby and has to have an operation, mummy has to have some medicine that will make her feel poorly but will make her better in the end, but it will make her hair fall out etc etc. In terms of you worrying about every ache and pain, that’s perfectly natural, every single one of us does that, it’s just horrible, and your mind races constantly.
Any questions please ask, you’ll get through and we’ll all help
Love Lydia x
Hi Claire, so sorry you find yourself here. I know exactly how you feel, waiting and not knowing is the hardest part. Me saying try not to worry probably won’t help but just wanted to let you know you’re not alone in this journey. This for is great and i’m sure others will be alonv soon. I noticed that your 30, I’m part of a younger breast cancer network on Facebook which currently has 170 ish members all of whom are fabulous at giving advice and making this crappy time that bit more bearable. It’s a completely secret group so no one can see what you post etc. I’m lianne by the way - 32, married with 2 boys 2 &7. I know I felt quite alone when I was diagnosed. I hope it’s not what you fear, try to enjoy Christmas as best you can. Big hugs xx
Hi claire. I lurk on this site alot but felt i had to reply to your post. I was diagnosed in January of this year aged 37 and mum to a 2 year old boy. I could not believe it. I was in shock for a week. COuldnt eat or talk. Just stunned. I was told initialy it hadnt affected my nodes ( i asked them right away). Only after the op- a mastectomy it was discovered it was in one node. That meant i needed chemo and the work- radiotherapy and now on tamoxifen. This year was grim- not doubt about that, but i wanted to let you know that things will get better. You wil be able to look at your kids without thinking you might not see them grow up. You wil be able to watch telly and do the shopping without thinking about breast cancer. I was terrified during the staging process. I was convinced it had spread everywhere. It had not. I am now back at work, back in the gym and I am taking part in a 5 k race in January the off to St Lucia for a holiday we always wanted to do. You do view life differently and appreciate things more. You will get through this. Remember, millions of women have been where you are now and millions are fine. Try and enjoy christmas as much as you can, but alow yourself to feel worried and upset. You need to get the tension out. there are loads of treatments and with the help of your medical team and connecting with others like us you will get through this. Thinking of you x x x
ps if that is you in the pic you are stunning. BTW I took diazepam to calm me down initially and help get through the scans x x
hi clare,
i was where you are in oct, invasive ductal cancer, and lympe nodes under arm and between lungs, haven’t had any surgery yet as they wanted to try chemo first, i’ve had 4 rounds now and was rescaned after 3rd one, and lumps have shrink down really well onc was so pleased with how it was responding to chemo, so hopefully you will have a good outcome.
big hugs xx
suzee
Hi Claire, welcome to the BCC forums
Along with the support you have here our helpliners are on hand 9-5 weekdays and 10-2 Saturday if you feel it would help to talk your feelings and concerns over, the number to call is 0808 800 6000
You may find the following link useful over the coming months, the page contains further support ideas and lots of information aimed at the needs of younger women:
Take care
Lucy
Hi Claire
Just wanted to send you big hugs sweetheart - I know where you’re at. I was also diagnosed with IDC (Grade 3) on Monday 17th December and am waiting for WLE/SNB which is scheduled for 9th Jan… although they did offer today … wish I’d taken them up on it now… as the waiting is the worst part…
There are lots of lovely ladies on here … they will be able to help and advise you… it is a rollercoaster of emotions… BUT we will get there… be kind to yourself…
Lozza x