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Diagnosed with breast cancer four days after getting married

20 REPLIES 20
steffers
Member

Re: Diagnosed with breast cancer four days after getting married

Hi everyone, thanks very much for all your positive posts...v much appreciated!! I intend to do lots of hoping and lots of praying...Hoping to be the success story you are Val!! Thanks xx
janis59
Member

Re: Diagnosed with breast cancer four days after getting married

Betty
Thank you for replying to my post. I went for a routine mammogram (my very first) and was called back with an unclear result, just thinking it was ofcourse an unclear xray. That was on 19.12.12, it has taken me 2 weeks to even look at any of the information that I was given, I feel really anxious at the moment, but now I have started to read the books and look at this website I feel I may have been given a wee bit of control back.

I have to get a Lumptescopy around 15.01.12, I suppose I will not know until after that what type etc. I have to receive radiotherapy on a daily basis for around 10 minutes, Monday-Friday for approximately 4-6 weeks. Thats all I really know right now.
mandyp
Member

Re: Diagnosed with breast cancer four days after getting married

Val - thank you for your post.....it has made me feel a lot better......you are amazing.
x
scottishlass
Member

Re: Diagnosed with breast cancer four days after getting married

I had BC at 39 and had to have chemotherapy before mastectomy because the tumour was described as large....5.5cm.
My kids were 6 and 13 and I was scared and there were no laptops in those days to share experiences.
Just to say that was almost 24 years ago and I am still around and my "kids" are now 30 and 37.
It has been an up and down ride but I am still here and enjoying life although I am back on a new chemo regime right now and my hair is falling out all over again.
Wishing all you newbies all the best and hope your treatments work as well for you as they did for me. Hugs, Val

Lucy_BCC
Member

Re: Diagnosed with breast cancer four days after getting married

Hi Janis

Welcome to you too, our helplines are on hand weekdays 9-5 and Sat 10-2 on 0808 800 6000 so please feel free to call to share your fears and concerns with someone who can help and offer you lots of support and information

The following link will take you to the BCC 'Just diagnosed' web page where you will find further support ideas and information which I hope you will find helpful;

http://www.breastcancercare.org.uk/diagnosis?utm_source=Homepage&%3Butm_medium=help_you&%3Butm_campaign=diagnosis

Best wishes

Lucy BCC

Bettie
Member

Re: Diagnosed with breast cancer four days after getting married

Janis59- I was diagnosed lasy year, had an op, chemo, rads & now Tamoxifen. This forum has been amazing. You will never feel alone and the support you get is brilliant. I have met in touch with my 'ladies' and we have met up once and planning another meet up in March.
I wish you all the best with your treatment. It is perfectly natural to feel scared but you will do it.
Sue x

Lucy_BCC
Member

Re: Diagnosed with breast cancer four days after getting married

Hi Steffers

Welcome to the BCC forums where I am sure you will find lots of support and information, here's the link to the Facebook thread you were after:

http://www.breastcancercare.org.uk/community/forums/younger-women/facebook-network-younger-women-diagnosed-breast-cancer

BCC can also offer you further support and I am posting a link to the 'Younger women's' information page where you will find information tailored to the needs of younger women ;

http://www.breastcancercare.org.uk/younger-women?utm_source=Homepage&%3Butm_medium=help_you&%3Butm_campaign=younger_women

Best wishes

Lucy BCC

Cheryl17
Member

Re: Diagnosed with breast cancer four days after getting married

Hi Steffens, can,t answer the young women'sFacebook question, but thought I would respond to bump your posting back to the top. Good luck and big hugs to you. Xxxxxx
janis59
Member

Re: Diagnosed with breast cancer four days after getting married

Hi, I have just been told I have cancer. I am very scared. I have looked at the posts and feel better already. I will be following this formum.

Thanks Janis x x
steffers
Member

Re: Diagnosed with breast cancer four days after getting married

hi, i was diagnosed with bc 17th dec...I am only 38..and have 7 year old twins...was wanting to join the young womens group on facebook, just wondering if anyone knew how to join it? Waiting on masectomy....the joys!!
mandymid
Member

Re: Diagnosed with breast cancer four days after getting married

Interesting that they said that Mandyj as I never explored why they didn't like the cold cap at my hospital, I just never asked. When my chemo is done I can't wait to speed out of that hospital and get home, not sure why! I don't like sitting about in there one min more than necessary!
Xxx
JenkiJ01
Member

Re: Diagnosed with breast cancer four days after getting married

Hi Girls, I was diagnosed on the 28 th Dec last year, I had a bilateral mx on feb 9th with saline implants straight away, my BC was eostragen receptive in both breast, I could have has a lumpectomy on my right breast as it was insitu and no lymph nodes affected, but decided to have them both off, on my left side it was invasive lobular with 3 lymph nodes affected out of 19, so had a clearance, I started chemo in April, I had TAC which was very strong but doable, like some of you I was petrified to have it bit it really was t that bad, radio therapy on left breast finished on September 17th, that was a walk in the park, just burnt my skin which healed in a couple of weeks. Now just taking tamoxifen, had a check up in october and they do t want to see me for a year. Hairs growing back, I have a fantastic wig !!. I feel GREAT !!!!, THERE IS AN END TO IT, hope this helps xxxxxx.
Love to you all
Jo x
mandyj
Member

Re: Diagnosed with breast cancer four days after getting married

Hi Karen
I did drive myself to my first 3 doses of chemo. Dragged my hubby along to the Taxotere ones as I was frightened of having a reaction to it. I didn't and would have been fine to drive after those too. As mandymid says, you will lose your hair before the second dose but it will return. You will get it shaved off as it becomes so sore. It was quite liberating. I got a barber to do it as I thought they have more experience of using the clippers than hairdressers!! They told me at my chemo chat that there is a small chance of getting brain mets if you use the cold cap. Not sure if anyone else was told this. I had already decided not to bother, its only hair. The cold cap means you have to spend more time at the chemo unit as it has to go on so long before your chemo and so long after, which makes it a long day. You also have to persevere with it for it to work.
Take care
mandyj.xx
mandymid
Member

Re: Diagnosed with breast cancer four days after getting married

Hi again Karen,
the hospital I'm being treated at doesn't favour the cold cap as they believe that it reduces the effectiveness of chemo??? I actually never asked about it as knew from a friend that they didn't offer it. I had thick longish blonde hair and as soon as it began to fall out, about a fortnight after my first chemo I chopped the pony tail off and donated my hair to a children's charity. This was v important to me. Then a day or so later I shaved it off. I couldn't stand watching it drop out. It was all over the place. Actually loosing my hair hasn't really affected me that badly. I think with so much else going on in your head you end up thinking its the least of your worries. I have a wig and a number of wraps, hats scarves etc. I wear a wig when I'm out as I didn't want to embarras s my children (anymore than I normally do) initially I felt like I had a label on my forehead saying "wig" but over time I realised that people didn't even know. at first I thought they were being kind but soon accepted that wasn't the case.
i don't drive to and from hospital as they told me not to drive home. I feel I poss could do and at worse feel a bit woozy. I don't feel that I need someone with me though as my chemo doesn't take long and there's always a nurse sat with you injecting the stuff in. I find the side effects are not that dissimilar to early pregnancy. Sadly without the amazingly lovely outcome!
your little boy will keep you going through the next few months as you have to mosey on for his sake
love
mandy x
KarenL2012
Member

Re: Diagnosed with breast cancer four days after getting married

Hi Mandy

Thank you. It really means a lot that people like you take the time to calm us newbies. I have to say the chemo is the one thing that terrifies me. Have you chosen to wear the cold cap? Do you drive yourself to and from the hospital or is that not possible.

I totally understand how the children are your driving force! Best of luck with the rest of your treatment and thanks again for the positive post.

Best wishes


Karen
mandymid
Member

Re: Diagnosed with breast cancer four days after getting married

Hi Karen, I was diagnosed this summer and experienced sheer terror like I couldn't believe.
i was 41. My sister has also had b.c and told me to just take each step as it comes. I'm just over half way through my chemo and had a bilateral mx. The thought of these was worse than reality.
i have 3 children, youngest of whom was 5 when I was diagnosed. We told our 3 children separately and have based our info on what we thought they could take. In the youngest ones case, not all that much really. My two teenagers were far more tricky. We've nbeen totally honest with all 3 of them.
my desire to see my children grow up has been my driving force. Lots of people say "aren't you brave" etc etc but I'm not and bravery doesn't come into it. The desire to be here for a good while yet is what has kept me going. I.e. you don't have a choice, well you do and it isn't a nice one.
You will experience highs and lows Karen and its important to allow yourself too, but you will be fine
good luck
mandy xxx
KarenL2012
Member

Re: Diagnosed with breast cancer four days after getting married

Hi Mandy
Thank you so much for your lovely message. It is so very helpful to know that there are others out there who have gone through the same process I am about to go through and if you don't mind I might come to you if I have any questions. We didn't know whether to use the Mummy's Lump book as we thought our 4 year old might be too young but its good to know someone with a child of a similar age has used it.
Good luck with the rest of your treatment.
Neadi, thank you for your post. I completely understand what you mean about the drugs but if it means we get to stay on this earth a good while longer it is our only option. I am terrified of the whole process but I desperately want to see my little boy grow up and I want to grow old and grey with my husband so I am prepared to do anything it takes even if I am a grumpy, chubby, bald, moody so and so for a few months!
Thank you girls, just reading your comments seems to have given me a boost.

XX Karen
Neadi
Member

Re: Diagnosed with breast cancer four days after getting married

Hi there
Just to say I too Was sailing on the I've sorted my life out boat too- married 3 years, lost loads of weight, downloaded work commitments, trying for a family.........then ........BOOM!!!!! Life in tatters...... Sept 28th. Grade 2 IDC with 1 fully positive node, micromets in 2 more, 27 nodes removed in total 3 weeks ago with mastectomy. On the wishlist for 37??? No way!!

You are not alone, and keep posting here. We're heading up to meet the oncologist on Thursday and am TERRIFIED. I seemed to take surgery ok, but the thoughts of these yucky drugs and side effects is scary, so I can relate to what you are saying.
All I keep doing is looking at other threads and seeing how others got through, and so will we, it's just so c€&p that we have to...

Xx
mandyj
Member

Re: Diagnosed with breast cancer four days after getting married

Hi Karen
Your story sounds a bit like mine. Jusy when I had my life back on track again and felt as fit as a fiddle I found my lump. I was diagnosed with grade 2 IDC in May this year. I was 36, just turned 37 in Nov. I had positive lymph node biopsy too. I had a therapeutic mammoplasty ( a lumpectomy with a boob uplift) and full node clearance (5 removed, only 1 positive for cancer). I have just finished 6 cycles of FEC - T chemo and have radiotherapy soon plus Tamoxifen.
I also have a little boy who is 4 tomorrow. I read the mummys lump book to him a million times!! He knows whats been going on but I think he will probably forget it all before long. He knows mommy had a poorly boob and that I have no hair for the time being.
My advice is to take each step of the treatment at a time. Once you have a treatment plan and dates it sorts your mind out a bit. The surgery is not that bad and not painful. Chemo is an endurance, not at all pleasant but there is an end to it. Stay focussed and keep a positive attitude. By finding this lump and getting it treated you have helped to save your life. You could have so easily missed or ignored it. I know how much it consumes you from the start and you will visit some very dark places in your mind, but this will pass. Just remember you are in control. By finding it and seeing a doctor you are already dealing with it.
PM me if you have any questions and if you do have chemo join a thread for the month that you start and you will go through the journey with ladies in the same situation.
Good luck.
mandyj.xx
Lucy_BCC
Member

Re: Diagnosed with breast cancer four days after getting married

Hi Karen and welcome to the BCC forums where you will find lots of support and shared experiences

Our helpliners are also on hand Monday to Friday 9-5 and Saturday 10-2 to offer you further support, information and a listening ear on 0808 800 6000

The following links will take you to the BCC's 'Just diagnosed' and 'Treatments' pages which contain more support ideas and lots of information/publications, the last link is for the 'Mummy's lump' book which may help you to approach talking to your little boy about your diagnosis in a way he can understand:

http://www.breastcancercare.org.uk/diagnosis?utm_source=Homepage&%3Butm_medium=help_you&%3Butm_campaign=diagnosis

http://www.breastcancercare.org.uk/treatment?utm_source=Homepage&%3Butm_medium=help_you&%3Butm_campaign=treatment

http://www2.breastcancercare.org.uk/publications/diagnosed-breast-cancer/mummys-lump-bcc164

Take care

Lucy

KarenL2012
Member

Diagnosed with breast cancer four days after getting married

Hi
Not exactly the honeymoon we had hoped for and it also takes the 'in sickness and in health' vow to the limit.
I met the cancer nurse on Thursday for my results. I need to have a lump removed from my breast and all my lymph nodes removed, she thinks it is highly likely I will need chemo, followed by radiotherapy. I will also need to take Tamoxifen.
Can't work out what part scares me the most. I started reading the chemo section and looking at people's hints and tips but it was all too much to take in. I think one step at a time will work better for me.
I have had an amazing year, turned 40, lost weight, started feeling great about myself, had a proposal, got married and now this! Gutted.
Keep trying to stay positive but it is very difficult. Just hope I don't have to have the op until after Christmas. We have a four year old and we really do not know what to tell him!
I have found the posts on here really helpful.
Best wishes to all

Karen