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Diagnosed yesterday any help appreciated


Re: Diagnosed yesterday any help appreciated

I was diagnosed on 24th Feb, my 53rd wedding anniversary. I am still in shock and it really has not sunk in yet. Had my ct scan on Mon and bone scan due Friday. Keep positive my consultant said everything is treatable. We will all get there.

Re: Diagnosed yesterday any help appreciated

thanks Donna. My onc was supportive so I'll get mine sorted down the line too.
Getting rid of them will def give me some peace of mind x

Re: Diagnosed yesterday any help appreciated

Hi lablover,


I havent got to have chemo either as other nodes all clear and have recovered well from op rads and tablets only,. whivh i am pleased about.


Interested in the BRAC gene,  I dont have it,but 2 good friends of mine do.  One had her breasts removed at 25 as her ,mum and aunt both sadly died of breast cancer, her sister and cousin also have the gene to, her sister had breast cancer but 18 years later still very much alive, and her cousin had her breast removed too. She will have to have her ovaries removed very soon, sister and cousin already have,  The other friends 2 aunts, and 4 cousins all had breast and ovarian cancers, but her mum suposedly didnt so my friend was never checked.  Sadly the same week i was diagnosed with breast cancer she was diagnosed with ovarian cancer and spots on lung,  Shes had operation got through it fine but has long road ahead bless her. So id say have the ovaries removed,although i dont have the gene im glad mine went when had my hysterectomy. and feel somewhere else less cancer can go.  June

Re: Diagnosed yesterday any help appreciated

Hi herewego

I had mine removed after I finished my chemo and radiotherapy



Re: Diagnosed yesterday any help appreciated

Hi Donna, I'm about to asked onc today about having my ovaries removed and was curious when in the treatment timetable did you have your op ie was it after you've finished all other treatments or did they squeeze it between your treatments? Thanks xx

Re: Diagnosed yesterday any help appreciated

Hi Lablover

sorry to hear of your ongoing nightmare..... but just to reassure you I had my ovaries removed last October via keyhole surgery..... painless and only in for 4 hours.....3 little puncture wounds which you can barely see now.

Good luck

Donna xx

Re: Diagnosed yesterday any help appreciated

Hi there


i had my results opn Friday, they found 3 tumours 10 mm, 8 mm & 6 mm so the dbl mx was the order of the day, )apparently the larger of the tumours weas a hairs breath from the chest wall, so very lucky that a routine mammogram was performed at the time that it was)


Thankfully lobes clear so no chemo..... again totally surreal feeling of numbness, husband saod aren't you happy? of course i am happy, but still floating around in a land where all this has happened to someone else!


Downside is that as my cancer appears to be BRAC related (not sure whether 1 or 2) i now have to be screened and have my ovaries removed as the risk is quite high fo rm on ovarian cancer....does this ever stop?


Thanks to everyone out there for their support and to the providers of this forum, which has been a life saver!



Re: Diagnosed yesterday any help appreciated

Isn't laughter wonderful, and you will find that the black laughter as vital as the normal in your journey, we did, my husband and i. The lady in the bed next to me was having double mx with no recon. She was in her 40s, loved horse riding, was married with 2 daughters. She didn't want anything to stop her hobby which destresed her, provided laughter, exercise and whole family time. At the time i couldn't have done that, my dx came out of the blue... Very brave but right for her.

Re: Diagnosed yesterday any help appreciated

Hi Mel.

I work from home too but have managed to wangle my way in to the office! I get my results tomorrow too. I can't believe they discharged you after a double mx without any pain meds! Absolutely ridiculous, are they short of money!? You've had a much bigger op than me and I'm still in some pain just over 2 weeks down the line!, so you must be very stoic. I went to the hairdressers today and found leaning back to have my hair washed quite painful on my boob! Found that quite depressing for some reason. Anyway at least I don't have grey hairs any more! I can't take codeine or Tramadol as I'm allergic and I find paracetomol and ibuprofen taken together works quite well, especially at night. You must be very sore poor thing. Let's remember that only a few years ago you'd be kept in hospital for a week or so after a big op like that. I really do think that discharging women after a double mx the next day is too soon. I know there's the risk of infection etc and people do recover better at home but even so. Anyway, all the best for tomorrow, will be thinking of you x Francine

Re: Diagnosed yesterday any help appreciated

Hi Francine

- apologies for the delay in replying - I work form home, so have been banned from the computer (until today) as it is so easy to log onto  work!

Have you had your results yet? mine are tomorrow......

right now still incredibly sore and have difficultiy sleeping, other than that i am fine, how about you? Must admit was a bit naughty and removed all my dressings before i went back to see them, I wanted to see the area on my own... I had the double mx then came home the next day (bit of a shock not to be given any pain meds!!  just take paracetamol if needed!  IF NEEDED!!! could tell she had not had this done!) its not the actual scar, that is fine its the very large ' polo mint' area where my breasts had been! that hurts / aches / uncomfotable all the time.  Hasd to go back twice so far (and 3rd time tomorrow) to have fluid removed from each breast as they keep swelling with 'seroma'.  It was really weird as i had opted to go flat and not have reconstruction, then lo and behold they both keep filling up and i look like i have B cup boobs!

Please let me know how your results went



Re: Diagnosed yesterday any help appreciated

Hi Mel

I love Pink Floyd! Just wanted to send you hugs and good wishes. I also know exactly how you feel. I had lumpectomy and sentinel node removal on 10 Feb (my birthday!) and had been in the denial/feeling numb stage up to then. I just couldn't seem to get my head round the fact it was happening to me and had this bizarre feeling that it was all a mistake! Perhaps it was someone elses result they had?!! Now that I'm waiting for the results, i seem to have become a mad person or madder than usual anyway. I could cry for England sometimes (good job Ocado delvered some more tissues) and have meltdowns at the stupidest things. I call it my booby brain at the moment. I am usually a practical businesswoman, running my own business, I should say. Anyway, i've lrarned from the forum that not every woman feels the same way when they get a diagnosis so however you are feeling, it's ok.
Francine xx

Re: Diagnosed yesterday any help appreciated

Whoops hit post too soon.
Well done on finding this site so early, posting and taking the support. I was slower, but now am finding out so much, and gaining so much support from others in this club.
Thinking of you all, sending gentle hugs

Re: Diagnosed yesterday any help appreciated

Hi all,
I am 10 months down the line, a verified member of the 0300hrs club, and have found these two books really helpful -

Emotional support through breast cancer - the alternative handbook. Dr Cordelia Galgut
What can i do to help? 75 practical ideas for friends and family from cancers frontline. Deborah Hutton

I have had amazing support from some mates, and others who persist with foot in mouth comments & talking to my wonky boobs and the ongoing stories of x,y,z who did or didnt survive their particular cancer. I feel a paid up member of my own mrs grumpy club, but reading these books has helped me adapt my perspective... in addition i may try lowerimg my stance soon to meet the boob talkers.... or i may front up to the (no pun intended) & redirect their point of focus.


Joking aside one lady on my return to the workplace persisted in questioning quite intimately re surgery / treatments etc & I wasnt prepared for this interrogation, especially with a kindly gentleman situated just over my shoulder. i have learnt by that & now if it occurs again have an answer ready to put a hold on the curiousity in an inappropriate situation.


Best wishes all



Re: Diagnosed yesterday any help appreciated

Oh thank you Mel, I AM NOT ALONE......... i was beginning to think i was strange........

Re: Diagnosed yesterday any help appreciated

Hi Melanie
I can totally relate to the Pink Floyd feeling. I was diagnosed 2nd June last year at the age of 47. Had mastectomy and lymph clearance with LD Flap reconstruction on 7th July, and then chemo which finished on 9th December. Other than the odd wobble, I remained pretty much numb all the way through. I think when faced with something so enormous it's your mind can go into self preservation mode and almost shut down to what's going on. It's like it's all happening in a parallel universe. Whenever anyone asked how I was, my stock answer was 'yeh.. I'm doing ok thanks'.

I'm 2 months out of treatment now and it's starting to hit me. There's a Pandora's Box sitting up in my head that I know I have to deal with. When I feel ready to open it, I'll take some of the counselling that's offered.

It will probably hit you at some time... but it can be a different point for each person. I've had a couple of embarrassing meltdowns in inappropriate places but it's ok... people really do understand when it happens. After a recent one, at a close friend's 50th birthday party, my friends told me that it was a relief for them to see me have a meltdown because they were so concerned that I had been too strong all the way through and was bottling too much up.

I guess what I'm trying to say is... Yes, what you're feeling is completely normal. You'll probably have meltdowns on occasion too... and that's completely normal. Just go with the flow and be kind to yourself.

Hugs Mel (another Melanie) x

Re: Diagnosed yesterday any help appreciated

Yes Melanie,


Youdo feel like itshappening to someone else, I know im more at risk, being over 60, but ive never felt over 60, and have few other risks, apart frim b eing on HRT for a few years  and have always been so healthy apart from a hysterectomy 7 years ago for fibroids, Ive had lump  removed and lymth glands and i still feel fine, so it still seems unreal.  Waiting for next part now, somehow thats worse in some ways, happy to have it removed but i find myself thinking why will i need anything else done, when i feel so well.

Re: Diagnosed yesterday any help appreciated



It sounds very normal to me - I felt like it was happening to someone else - it was a surreal experience - went to all my appointments cheerfully asking questions but feeling not much at all.  Also found it difficult to  sleep and I also read absolutely everything I could get my hands on.  I too found the BCN to be next to useless though perfectly pleasant - and found myself being nice to them so that they felt they were helping me! 



Re: Diagnosed yesterday any help appreciated

Apologies for lack of posting, though i must admit i have ready everything on here and everywhere else on web, i know some people say not to, i have found it very helpful to read  anything and everything - otherwise this is such a lonely process!


I have had a date for a week today (9th Feb) have to be at the hospital for 7.30 am for surgery that morning for a double mastectomy and lobe thingy (can never remember the word for that)...and to coin medical advice so far ....we won't know any more until afer the op!


All been a rather surreal process - fed up with questions as to how am i feeling.....how do you answer i feel absolutely nothing? BCN was no help when she rang a week after diagnosis, oh you will be one of the ones that hits the wall when you go in for surgery.....not very helpful......! i just hope that if i do lose it, it will be when i get home, (and not in ASDA during weekend shop)at least i will be with those that care (something i have so far found lacking in welsh NHS - their total assistance so far has been to give me a leaflet - but at least that give me details of this site!)


any cyber help now would be really appreciated


anyone else feel this strange 'comfortable numb' feeling whilst going through this process, whether currently on this journey, or thankfully successfully finished it? Contrary to medical and family comments i am not in denial, i just feel nothing other than absolutley knackered from lack of sleep the 1am to 4am low points where you are wide awake with all sorts flying around your head.....


thanks for the site, would have been completely lost without it








Re: Diagnosed yesterday any help appreciated

Thank you all for your kind responses, it is all so much to take on board right now, i am still 'comfortable numb' almost had a wobble on Saturday, I had intended, after working all week to try and have a weekend to chill and take stock, however, Saturday morning i received my letter to go to the hospital this Friday for my pre-op checks (which usually mean surgery in 2 weeks) and this brought it all to the front on my thoughts and a little too close for comfort.

It is all so surreal through I find myself asking my other half all the time if he is ok and also quite concerned with my sons aged 22 & 24 that they are ok and answer any questions they may have (Incidentally my eldest strongly believes i should go for the reconstruction and even consider going up a size!, obviously he is a 'breast guy'..... i already am a 32 D cup so to be honest the loss of them does not really bother me too much, this may change, but right now i am concentrating on the loss of the breasts as not major as i have never believed they have 'defined me' as a person... I am more concerned on the results following the lobe thingy, as until then i really will not know what the future brings.


I won't let the family know that i may not be blue, as that is causing a few laughs right now, and they are greatly needed!


Again thank you all for the replies, it is so nice to know that you are not on your own  xx

Re: Diagnosed yesterday any help appreciated

Hi lablover.

I had single mastectomy a month ago, not having reconstruction till after all my chemo and radiation over..even then debating if I will. My surgeon said a surprisingly number of women decide not to reconstruct as they're just over it.

Its so shocking,  but surreal,  we all understand here. im a month past surgery and it still feels odd.

Much love



Re: Diagnosed yesterday any help appreciated

Hi Lablover

I'm 47 and had a bi lateral mastectomy and sentinel node biopsy without reconstruction on Dec 1st after I was diagnosed with invasive lobular cancer.

I'm recovering fine, I've had a couple of problems like some numbness and funny sensations while my nerves recovered from the tissue removal and some stiffness and tightness, but that's different for everyone.  The one important thing is to do the exercises they give you religiously.  I found them tough at first but I'm glad I did them.  I felt very stiff at first but gradually they got easier.  I found my left arm especially stiff since that was the side I had the sentinel node biopsy done.  I still feel stiff every morning but once I've done the stretches I do loosen up and its still early days.

I avoided lifting anything heavy and rested the first few days because I tired easily and the drains made moving about a bit awkward.  In the hospital I was given a lovely bag with long handles to carry them in that former breast cancer patients had made and it came in very handy for short trips to the loo etc.  I found it easiest to sleep on my back with the drains either side of me (my poor OH slept on the sofa in case he rolled onto them in the night).  I can't tell you how good it felt the first night I was able to sleep on my side 😄

I have the option to have reconstruction but before I consider that I have some chemo and rads to do and they'll affect the decision as well.  I was given softies to wear in my bra after the op (if I wanted to) until I have my silicone falsies in a couple more weeks but I only used them once to give me some shape on Christmas day.  I felt more natural without all the fake padding in front of me but everyone is different.  It might be that its because my natural breasts were an A cup and quite firm so I rarely wore a bra anyway and wearing one now feels strange.  At the moment I don't want reconstruction but that may change...

It is a very surreal time, I've gone from laughing hysterically to blubbing my head off to being comfortably numb (LOVE Gilmour's solo at the end of that song) but somehow still dealing with everyday life.  Sending you hugs

If there's anything you'd like to ask me, fire away.

Love L x

PS My radioactive jab never did turn me blue, I was quite disappointed ;D xxx

Re: Diagnosed yesterday any help appreciated

Hi, I was diagnosed with DCIS in right breast after routine screening September 4th and had mastectomy with immediate implant reconstruction and reduction to left breast on December 4th. I too went along for results convinced there would be nothing wrong. I was in shock and denial for several weeks. Probably still am! Laughter is good, my partner and I have laughed uncontrollably at times and cried at others. Many choose not to have reconstruction and are content. You must do what is right for you. It is a strange period whilst you wait for dates and treatment plans. The good thing about DCIS is that in the majority of cases after mastectomy no further treatment is required. I wish you well and the forum is a great place to find out information and support from people who appreciate your fears and concerns x

Re: Diagnosed yesterday any help appreciated

Hi there - was diagnosed with DCIS at beginning of Feb 14 - following first mamo - had ultrasound biopsy and then core biopsy with 20 plus samples taken and then told that had to have mx - so far sounds like yours though I only needed a single not double. And I went for immediate reconstruction with strattice and implant.  And have also since had fat transfer from thighs (painful!) to recon and an uplift to good boob (no prob).  There are plenty of ladies on here that do not go for recon and I am sure that they will be in touch with their advice soon.  Good luck!

Re: Diagnosed yesterday any help appreciated

Hello Lablover


Welcome to the forums.  I'm sorry to hear of your diagnosis, the first few weeks are always difficult when coming to terms with your diagnosis and treatment.
As well as the support you will receive on the forums you might find it helpful to order the BCC resources pack. It has been specifically designed for those newly diagnosed and contains information to help you understand your diagnosis, test results and the various treatments available. If you would like to order a copy just follow the link bellow:-


We also have our ‘Someone Like Me’ service which is not face to face but telephone or email based support with a volunteer who has had a diagnosis of breast cancer.  Here is a link for further information on this, http://www.breastcancercare.org.uk/breast-cancer-services/someone-talk/one-one-support


You may also like to talk things through with one of the helpline staff, they are there to offer emotional support as well as provide information. The free phone number is 0808 800 6000 and lines are open 9-5 Monday to Friday and 10-2 Saturday.


Best wishes

June, moderator


Diagnosed yesterday any help appreciated

Hi there I am 51, pretty healthy, not overwieght or anything, following a routing screening in November  I was recalled and informed abnormalities etc had to have a biopsy, waited a week for results, saw Doctor who informed me that there was a large area of concern and she needed a further biopsy.  Went for that on 31st Dec in 'vice' from 8:45 until 11.10...... and as anyone who has had a mammogram will understand, that was really uncomfortable! They ended up taking 20 samples from 3 sites and i went yesterday totally happy and confident that all was ok only to be be told I had to have a double masectomy and armpit thingy done, in about 4 weeks time, she mentioned the radioactive dye etc and warned my husband that i would appear 'blue' that set us off laughing (probably a bit too  much!) that i would look like a Smurf.... there we are getting horrendous news and laughing about him bringing a white hat a taking photos of me looking like a Smurf...


Back to being sensible, I have opted for the double masectomy without reconstruction - anyone else out there in forum land done this?  I do not want reconstruction under any circumstances.  Has anyone else done this? how long was the recovery?   hundreds of questions, feel weird only way i can describe how i feel at this moment is in the words of Pink Floyd in that I am 'Comfortably Numb'  but am not daft...appreciate that this will hit home pretty soon and I will be a jibbering wreck, but right now trying to get as much info on board


Thanks to anyone who can help or can just let me know that there are others out there in the same situation right now