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Feeling Anxious

19 REPLIES 19
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Re: Feeling Anxious

I dont get many colds but I would rather than this

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Re: Feeling Anxious

Oh yes I get lots of "should u be doing that" but in fairness it has been doing things like having a Halloween party for kids etc. I tell them I'm not going through this to deprive myself of the things I enjoy. I say you tell em where to go. If I'm cheeky with anyone I just say "I'm allowed to say that. I've got cancer". That usually shuts them up.

I'm fed up with people telling me how well I !look. Just so u know....u haven't seen me when I feel ill! Mind u if have looked well even when hovering over the toilet after chemo.
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Re: Feeling Anxious

Enjoying reading this thread, especially about comments.... I was told to really think if I should be knitting, and may be ask my surgeon. I am having my 6th operation tomorrow, long story, and getting a lot of people telling me to rest, and "are you sure" when mentioning doing any type of excercise.People mean well, and it is a state of mind, as we, probably, can be a sensitive lot here

One weeknd I did ignore the phone, did not open e-mails as thought if any one tells me to rest I shall scream!!!Dont I soundungrateful ??I am not, just feeling emotional I suspect. Love to you all on here!

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Re: Feeling Anxious

gk and all you other lovely positive ladies.

 

As you say gk most people in the Chemo clinic looked like they were popping in for a quick fix of something.  I am, like many other ladies, an avid fan of research.  Sometimes this is a bad thing but i can't help myself.

 

I had Neo adjuvant Chemo, treatment day was Thursday and i always went out for lunch after somewhere nice.  People do say odd things but i like you ladies am so grateful for the support.  If i ever wondered in the last 30 years if i had married the right man the last twelve months has told me i definitely did.

 

Thinking of you all as you go through treatment.  Take Care    Gilly x

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Re: Feeling Anxious

Jaine I'm a triple neg and avid researcher too! I had chemo before surgery. It ain't a walk in the park but it also wasn't as bad as I imagined.my husband said how odd it was in the unit. We expected everyone to look like Belsen residents but he said it looked like people had just popped in from work for a quick fix! I still managed some work and school runs on my good weeks until half way through. Organised lots of friends coming over for tea and gentle outings for just before next chemo when I was at my best. Chemo is your friend cos its gonna blast that so and so. Good luck
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Re: Feeling Anxious

Hi jaine and abbey

Thank god for the lovely ladies on here who support each other in more ways than our family and friends know. I do think others that haven't experienced cancer do not know how we feel. I think once you have had the operations they think OK move on everything back to normal again, I wish.lol. My best friend said something to me at the beginning of this journey "the problem with breast cancer is, it is unpredictable, for the rest of your life it will not be far from your thoughts. Basically it is a b-----d" sorry for swearing her words not mine.

I to wish I wasn't in this this club but I have met some very strong women on this site.

I also appreciate the support from family and friends, but the ladies on this site are amazing, I don't know how we keep sane.

Thanks for your replies

big hugs for you all

love  Janet. xxxx

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Re: Feeling Anxious

I see I am not the only one who has to deal with unhelpful comments.   I guess our nearest and dearest don't want to deal with the reality of this business.  Come to think of it I don't want to either.  Having said that I do appreciate the support I have had from family and friends

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Re: Feeling Anxious

I was diagnosed in September and had mastectomy and snb 2 days later. I am now on hormone therapy for 5 years. I should feel elated, but I think it is hitting me more now. My family are very supportive, but can make some hurtful comments similar to the posts here. I'm trying to carry on as normal and keep my wobbles to myself! I find reading through this forum helps keep me sane.
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Re: Feeling Anxious

Hi again
My husband sounds awful. he is my rock and I love him to bits just wish he would think before he says stuff,
well wish you all well
good night and god bless
janet
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Re: Feeling Anxious

Hi everyone

Just thought I would share a couple of my OH comments with you all, Last week I had my second surgery to remove some dcis that was found in the margin of the IDC surgery.  I was explaining to him that I had asked the surgeon what would happen if more cancer was found, would I have another WLE or mastectomy. My husband commented that my glass was always half empty. I suggested he let me know how he would feel if he was dx with cancer.  Then the other night I couldn't sleep yet again, I was using his tablet, he asked what I was looking at, I said I was on this site, he answered couldn't I have a day off from breast cancer. That was Saturday. We are only just speaking again.

I agree with others on here, if you have never had breast cancer ( I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy ) then you don't know how it feels.  I personally find the waiting for results and not sleeping the worst.

Well good night everyone

gentle hugs to you all

Janet xxxx

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Re: Feeling Anxious

Morning Jaine.

 

I don't want to exclude 'the general public' but i think only somebody with a diagnosis of, and going through treatment for Breast Cancer can understand how we feel.  I know lots of people have Cancer / surgery but because of the complex nature / different types of Breast Cancer, hormone positive / negative,  triple negative etc, the treatment is lengthy, different for everybody and can be ongoing for years with hormone therapy. 

 

People do say the strangest things.  When i was diagnosed one well meaning friend told me not to worry as Breast Cancer is just like the common cold now!!!.  I do know lots more ladies are being Diagnosed now but God i hope she never gets this cold!!!!

 

In terms of preparing yourself for Chemo, you can look at all the practical stuff and suggestions re. oral care, avoiding infection etc but everybody really is different in terms of side effects.  

 

Thinking of you as you prepare for the next step in your treatment and you are so right, You do it your way!!

 

Take Care.  Gilly x

 

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Re: Feeling Anxious

I am realising that I have a lot to learnt about Chemo, still I am going to have two or three weeks to prepare for next appointment.  My daughter asked today why I kept reading up on stuff, why didn't I wait till I was told what I needed to know.  In the next breath she told me I should have been 'mentally prepared' for what they said.  Yeah.... well - I am going to do it my way, step by step, bit by bit.  By the time I have my appointment I will know more about chemo and PICC lines etc, thanks to this forum.  It is good to read everyone's comments and stories, they help so much.

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Re: Feeling Anxious

Hi Jaine, so pleased all cancer is removed and I'm sure with all the support on this forum it will help you get through chemo x
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Well that was good news and bad. Surgery was good all cancer removed and not spread to lymph nodes. It is triple negative so I have to have chemo. Thank you for your kind words they really helped
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Re: Feeling Anxious

Yes, one day/one step at a time. So glad to read others who are also annoyed by those who mean well but are somehow psychic and tell you that you'll be fine. I am so glad the surgeons and BCNs don't way that, as if they did it would somehow negate our very real and justified fears. Breathe deep Jaine, we all know just how you feel, and I hope you can maybe find a little strength in knowing that you are not alone.

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Re: Feeling Anxious

I'm feeling exactly the same as you, surgery 19th Nov and results on the 12th Dec. I feel like I am in no man's land at the moment, trying to stay positive. Sending you a hug! x
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Re: Feeling Anxious

It's ok to have all those feelings. I just want to send a hug your way. I was in a similar place last November when I had my Surgery just try to breathe and take each day as it comes.
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Re: Feeling Anxious

Hi. I am with you in those feelings - and my surgery was August. I feel anxious when I have appointments too. Everyone says you'll be fine, you tell yourself you'll be fine, but the doubt and then the enormity of the situation just drags you right back down again.

I find reading these forums and reaching out to others here who know exactly how you feel, as you just have done really helps.

When I posted about my anxiety, I had a message from a lovely lady I would like to share with you - She said to take it one day at a time. At first I couldn't appreciate what that really meant, but as time has passed and I'm still here, it makes sense!

You will get your life back and you have every right to feel sorry for yourself!

<<<<<<group hug!>>>>>>

(gently) :)x

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Re: Feeling Anxious

Hi Jaine, of course you're feeling anxious - you'd be crazy if you weren't! Everyone telling you that you'll be fine "I know you will" actually gets a tad annoying after a while, doesn't it? Are they all psychic? Or even psychic oncologists?? Then I used to feel guilty that I'd even had that thought. And the next day and night will be long. There's nothing at all I can say that will make any difference to your anxiety, but we've all been this road on our own, so can now go along it again with you. Cyber hands to hold, and hugs. Do post and say how you get on. <<<<<<<Jaine>>>>>>> (cyber hugs!)

 

Jane x

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Feeling Anxious

I felt much better than I expected after the surgery but now I feel depressed and anxious about going for the follow up appointment on Tuesday.  I had a WLE and SNB and everyone says it's going to be fine but that is not the way I feel right now.  I just want my life back.  I am bored, tired and  feeling sorry for myself!  I know I should be pleased that it was discovered early etc etc but I am feeling trapped.