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Feeling scared

12 REPLIES 12
Amalfi
Member

Re: Feeling scared

Please anyone who is feeling anxious, you could get something from your gp to help. I don't know why we are not advised of this when diagnosed. I don't think anyone not going through this knows how torturous the waiting is. I took something for a couple of days then spoke to a friend who had been through it and I felt much better.
JoolsW
Member

Re: Feeling scared

Hi Herewego

wow you ladies on this forum are so brave and inspiring.  I cannot imagine how hard it was for you to tell your young child, I found it hard enough telling my adult sons!  I haven't told everyone yet, only very close friends and immediate family as like you I want to know what treatment I will be having first, plus I keep crying when I tell people.  I also having bit of trouble sleeping (hence this post being so late ), but sleep is getting a bit better.   I hope you are recovering well and I'm  wishing you a speedy recovery from surgery.  Thank you for replying to my post.

 

JoolsW xx

JoolsW
Member

Re: Feeling scared

Hi gazzlyn

thank you for your hugs and kind helpful words I really appreciate them.  I really hope your doing good after your surgery.  Thank you .

 

JoolsW xx

Herewego
Member

Re: Feeling scared

Hi JoolsW - you are in good company here as these ladies are amazing. I was diagnosed on 6th Jan and am now in hospital recovering from lumpectomy and full node removal on right side as biopsies confirmed spreading.

I'm used to being in control but the word cancer really floored me and I became cry baby who couldn't sleep. I got great support here and learned a lot about the new normal. The waiting for the results and treatment plan was absolutely horrendous but once I got the plan I felt much more in control again and can actually plan forward now.

I didnt tell the rest of family and friends until I got the initial results and treatment plan as I was in no mood to answer questions for which I had no answers to. By far the worst thing was telling my 4yr old that mummy has a bad lump. Everyone else has been breeze compared to that and people has commented how calm I am. Guess I'm over the initial shock and now just want to fight this with everything xx

gazzlyn
Member

Re: Feeling scared

Hi joolsw Big hugs to you I know how scared you must be feeling. I think I have been through every emotion going. As difficult as it is try not to think too far ahead. Its tough waiting for results but have faith in the professionals that they will do everything in their power to help you. Even if the cancer is in your lymph nodes it doesnt mean it has spread. Try not to worry, ring your breast cancer nurse I am sure talking to her will reassure you xx I am currently resting after surgery and have that two week wait for results, it is not easy but we will do it Heart

Rosie_Rabbit
Member

Re: Feeling scared

Sodastream - Thanks ever so much for that, it's reassured me too.

Rosie xx
JoolsW
Member

Re: Feeling scared

Hi Sodastream/Sheryl

Thank you sooo much for your reply.  You are right I have been tempted to google things but I haven't.  I didn't even want to take the booklets the breast care nurses give you in hospital, but thankfully my husband took them and I read them the next day.  I guess that was a bit of deniel. You are very right every slight ache or pain in my body has me convinced it has spread there. I hope I become strong and positive like you. I don't like this weepy person I've become.  I keep thinking "what if its spread, what if its everywhere". My head keeps saying "its in your nodes!!!"   Thank you Sheryl for your good words of wisdom. I hope you are doing well ..... finishing treatment wow that sounds so good. 

 

I have a feeling I will be posting often looking for reassurance and hopefully one day I will be able to offer some help and reassurance to another newbie.

 

Julia Woman Sad

JoolsW
Member

Re: Feeling scared

Hi Chascat

thank you sooo much for your reply, even that made me cry with your kind words.  The waiting is awful, I just want to get on with treatment.  I gather the feeling sick bit is just nerves and anxiety?  I hope you are doing well now.  Thank you for your reassurance.

 

JoolsW xx

JoolsW
Member

Re: Feeling scared

Thank you Lucy.
Sodastream
Member

Re: Feeling scared

Hi Jools, firstly so sorry that you have found yourself on this forum having been diagnosed. It is natural to feel so scared in those first days, I shut myself in my room and cried for 2 days. Let me tell you it does get easier once you start treatment and are back in control. I was diagnosed in April and every cough had me thinking it had spread so much so when I had the results from my ct scan that my lungs were ok I didn't care about the fact it had spread to my lymph nodes. Due to mine being a particularly aggressive type I had chemo first, then mastectomy followed by radiotherapy. I'm pleased to say the chemo worked as in by the time of my surgery my lymph nodes were clear of cancer. I did the cold cap so didn't lose my hair and although I won't lie it is tough getting through treatment it also brings lots of positives to your life. I have met wonderful people on the chemo thread on this forum, I have realised how much my family and friends love me, I was surprised at how strong and positive I became. The best thing is now treatment has finished I have an amazing new attitude to life to live for the day, enjoy every single moment and not to let the little things bother me.
My advice to you at this stage is stop looking forward and live a day at a time as you can get through a day. Do not google for information as you'll scare yourself witless instead stick to this forum as we've been there and will give you honest answers. If you need to chat more feel free to PM me. Sheryl x
chascat
Member

Re: Feeling scared

Hi Joolsw

 

Welcome to the forum. I am so sorry you've had to join us but it's a good place and you'll get lots of support. When I was diagnosed 3 years ago my reaction was exactly the same as yours, I imagine it is for a lot of us. I cried constantly, my husband said it was like having a tap attached to my face! I couldn't eat or sleep and just lived in this bubble of terror. According to my ultrasound my nodes were clear but one was found to be cancerous after surgery, so i then had to go through another operation to remove my nodes and the terror intensified. The waiting is just vile, it's the worst part, my daughter was 4 when i was diagnosed and all i could think about was her growing up without me, it was a nightmare. It is normal for your breast to feel a bit odd after the biopsies so don't let that worry you, my whole breast turned black after mine and took weeks to return to normal. Once you have your treatment plan in place you will start to feel better, it's the not knowing that is unbearable. Might be worth ringing the BCC helpline, they are wonderful and I used them many times during the difficult early days, you will feel better after speaking to them I promise, please feel free to PM me if you need anything. Take care and keep us posted, CC x

Lucy_BCC
Member

Re: Feeling scared

Hi Jools and welcome to the BCC forums, I am sure you will find the support you are looking for here, in addition, our helpline is open today so please feel free to call and talk things through with someone in confidence. Lines are open 10-2 today and 9-5 during the week on 0808 800 6000

This link will take you to the just diagnosed area of this site where you will find further support and information to help you through this difficult time:

https://www.breastcancercare.org.uk/diagnosis

Take care
Lucy BCC

JoolsW
Member

Feeling scared

Hi,

I am new to all this but looking for help, reassurance and anything others can offer me.  I was diagnosed on 15th Jan this year with invasive grade 2 bc in left breast it is also in my nodes of left arm pit.  I had convinced myself and loved ones I only had cysts I am now just so, so scared.  I am waiting appts for MRI, CT and another mammogram then back for those results and treatment plan.  I feel sick all the time, I've convinced myself it has spread as its in my nodes.  I am crying all the time and cannot think of anything else. I am hoping i'll feel better once MRI, CT etc done so I know  exactly whats happening.  Is it normal for my breast to feel sore/tingle ( I had biopsies done nearly 2 wks ago). 

 

My husband is so supportive and kind and I feel I am letting everyone down by being so wet and crying.  Please help I am so scared its spread.

 

Woman Sad  thank you xx