Holiday
Holiday Did not know where to post this , so i put it here . i would like to take Nicky away for a holiday but how long should i wait after Rads are finished , would like to book it now so we got something positve to look forward to , also will there be a problem with travel insurence etc.
Thanks in advance
Tim
Aaahhhhhhhhh holidays …this is a difficult one Tim. I think it is less about when one feels physically able to go on holiday and more about when one feels emotionally able to be away from home and the sense of security it provides, and step into, or back into a social forum.
She may need time at home to feel safe again, before embarking on something new and different albeit as pleasureable as a holiday.
On the whole this may be something you should decide together after treatment or it may become a pressure in itself.
You can still get good deals at the last minute, and it would be awful to book something when it may not be the right time.
I know I didn’t want to go away initially and became a bit reclusive for a while - which was ok, and slowly I did become more sociable again, but we are all different. Perhaps you need to discuss with Nicky after rads have finished. You may also find she may not wish to go somewhere hot after rads for a while, as it is wise to stay covered up.
In my case Travel Insurance came free with my credit card (if I booked the holiday with it), they did ask me a series of questions i.e. had I been given a terminal diagnosis, was I going abroad to seek medical treatment etc., and I did take with me a letter from my consultant saying I was fit to travel, I had no problem with this - I believe there has been another thread somewhere recently specifically about travel insurance.
I hope this helps
Take care
Celeste
Holidays Hi Tim
We went away two weeks after my rads finished and this was the best thing I could have done (holiday was booked before diagnosis). The idea of an “escape” from medical care kept me going through all of my treatment (but this will not be everyones view).
We didn’t go far (northern france) so I had the “security blanket” of being able to get back to the UK easily if i needed to.
The subject of travel insurance is often raised here so hopefully the search facility of the site will help with this (It isn’t a problem I had as our private medical insurance also provides our travel insurance - only needed 3 different consultants to sign that I was fit to travel!)
— Hi Tim,
I was told that RT effects continue for about 3 weeks after treatment finishes. I got a bad skin reaction. The broken skin healed just in before i went away 3 weeks after treatment. If it hadn’t i wouldn’t have been able to swim.
Hope you both have a great time, you 'll deserve it.
Best wishes
Kelley
Holidays Hi Tim, I finished rads on 31 Jan and went ski-ing 10 days later, it was great to get away from thinking about hospitals etc. but I found that it was very tireing and didn’t do as much ski-ing as I used to and the burns really were horrid so it meant the spa hotel was not a good choice as I couldn’t go swimming or use the spa facilities. But all in all, great to get away and relax.
So hope you both have a good time.
Karen x
Liz Hi Liz
I hope you don’t mind, but I have moved your post from this topic and started a new topic with it. The new topic is in this forum and is called ‘Removing general surgeon’. Hopefully this will mean that your post will be more available for other people to read and respond to.
Kind regards
BCC Moderator
— Hi Tim — How are the ideas on the holiday going?
I couldn’t afford to get away from it all plus I had responsiblity for my aged parents and a couple of elderly neighbours, but I know that some of the friends I made during treatment all were taken away for short holidays and they REALLY benefited from it.
As Celeste says it is the emotional part which is probably going to determine whether and when and where. A self-catering holiday will give you freedom as to when you eat or sleep and yet to be waited on would be sooooooooo lovely.
Please let us know what happens.
Joy x
— Thanks all for your replies , decided that we will wait until her rads are over then we will see how she feels , may be the lake district if she is not up to flying , we still have to get the date for her ovaries removal so that will have a bearing , hopefully we can get away between the end of her rads and the op . She has decided to work part time now as she is getting pretty tired and tearfull . I wanted to surprise her with a holiday, but i think its better to discuss it , dont want to make her feel she has to go when she would rather wait a bit longer .
One last thing ,in your experiences , is there anything that i should be doing to support her more , i am constantly telling her i love her and leaving notes and stuff lots of hugs and cuddles , ive started doing the shopping and more stuff around the house , all stuff that i should have done before but never seemed to have the time , i dont want to keep saying everything is going to be OK because she must be sick of that , i have tried to learn as much as i can about BC and try to understand everything that is going on , not easy for a builder
Tim
Hi Tim, Lake District, Interesting Choice As my hubby wanted to treat me to a holiday after I had finished my rads.
I have always wanted to go to the Lake District and thought it would be really good to go somewhere beautiful and peaceful.
One word of advice though, my hubby wanted to go there so that we could hike up and down the fells all day, not quite what I had in mind, and he looked suitably surprised and abashed when I told him on a couple of occasions that I was too knackered still to do a 12 mile hike every day.
Bless him, I still love him to bits, he just does not always think things thru. maybe it is a man thing :))
Rgrds/Siggy
Tim forgot to mention If you do decide on the Lake District I can highly recommend the hotel we stayed at.
It was the Skelwith Bridge Hotel in Ambleside, they do have a web page, and it was nicely situated, fantastic surroundings, very comfortable and the food was to die for.
Not B & B prices but an occasionaly bit of luxury does not go amiss.
Rgrds/Siggy
The most important thing to do… …is to listen Tim. Not just to Nicky but also to yourself. This is tough. My husband went into overdrive of reassurance (who was he trying to reassure), and practical tasks. Don’t get me wrong I was and am very grateful to him, but actually we couldn’t really relax with each other until we had both spoken about our unspeakable fears. Interestingly once they are out in the open I think we were both less frightened. This is a long haul and in order to be any good to anyone you have to look after yourself, take time to do the things you enjoy - you are not a bottomless pit.
I’ve already mentioned my husbands volume of reassurance had an effect on me - the opposite of what he had intended - it made me realise how frightened he was. I am sure you are doing everything right Tim, but even if you are not I’m sure you have a good enough relationship for her to tell you. It might be a good idea to ask her what else she needs
Take care
Celeste
— Hi Tim — Second everything the others have said. Listening is so very important, and sometime your wife may come out with something that you feel like saying, ‘don’t talk silly - everything will be ok’… but you MUST let her talk… During our down moments we really need this, and that helps the moment to pass.
The only other thing I would add, after reading how romantic you are, is ------ do you have several clones please for the rest of us?
Joy
— I think we are going to go to centre parks , its not too far to drive and they have a spa so Nicky can have a few treatments if she feels up to it .
Celeste , i think you are right , i am trying to convince myself as much as her that everything is going to be ok , i am still very frightened .
As for romantic , well ive realised how much she means to me .
Thanks all
Tim
doing more By the sounds of it you are doing everything right.
my husband is doing his best and i know there are times when he is so scared of loosing me. he goes quite and withdrawn.
The thing we do have is that we talk and on occassions will both admit to being frightened.
I am generally a very strong person and if anyone in my family was to get cancer it would have to be me because i have the strength to fight it whereas my husband suffers with depression and finds life difficult at the best of times.
Anywhy, what he also does for me is to treat me as normal most of the time, unless i show sings of not coping.
It’s nice to talk of things not related to cancer and do normal things like go to see a movie or go out for a meal, making life “normal”
He does more around the house since i had cancer, i think he appreciates me more
you could do with a live chat forum for the husbands to talk and get support from because it is not just us going through it but the men as well,and just as painful
you sound like you are doing just fine.
Sharon
Hi Tim,
Which Centreparcs - have you been before. We’ve been to two (when the kids were smaller) - both different experiences. Which one were you thinking of.
We both had treatments in the spa when the kids were off doing other things - so do remember to look after yourself too.
Take care
Celeste
centreparks We are prob going to Elveden Forest , i think its on the way to Norwich , i have never been before so any info would be great .
Tim
Elveden…! …ah the one that burnt down! We went a few years ago after it had (almost) been re-built. I don’t think Centreparcs own that one anymore - I think there were issues with insurance as a result of that fire.
As I say we went after the fire when things were not quite rebuilt - actually in first 2 weeks of re-opening.
Are you fom East Anglia - I am originally from Suffolk.
Celeste
— The Elveden Forest one is still a centre parks , its still on there web page , i live in Surrey so its only a couple of hours drive for us . I just want to get her away from it all so we can try and forget everything for a few days , if thats possible
Tim
The Aqua Sauna’s…— …at Centreparcs are not to be beaten, very relaxing, and the treatments great. Take as much food as you can though as this is really expensive there. Have fun.
Celeste