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How do I cope?

17 REPLIES 17
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Re: How do I cope?

Hi Lisa
My head has been like soup for the last week just like you. Talk talk talk to anyone you will listen, The girls on here are great their knowledge fantastic and their wisdom brilliant. I have spoken to braest care nurse and GP too. They both say the mixed emoitions are normal, but when yo'uve been the one to organise everyone round you its hard not to be in control.
Chin up and big smiles and laugh as of ten as you can.
Bridie xx

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Re: How do I cope?

Hi prettywoman....

Sorry about your dx, it's very hard in the early days but it does get better.

Try not to be frightened of the chemo, my breast care nurse said If you feel like crap then imagine what the chemo is doing to any stray cells.It is hard but doable as many others on here will tell you.

I go to a support group that my hospital recommended/run and it has helped so much. I have met so many other women all different ages and at very different stages of treatment.

Keep us posted and good luck....

P xxxx

PS. this discussion is a thread.....you will see many threads relating to many subjucts under each catergory on the left hand side of screen.

Guest user
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Re: How do I cope?

Hi All

Sorry it's take me a few days to reply, but my heads been all over the place and I wouldn't have made sense anyway. I was overwhelmed when I saw all the comments, I never expected such support and kind words. My chemo starts next week and I am so frightened, but the sooner it starts the better. It's true, you are all wonderful and I am so grateful for all your comments, it has helped immensely.

The hospital said there is a support group there so I am going to join that, by the way Magsi whats a thread?

Lis

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Re: How do I cope?

hi lisa, sorry you have had to come here.
it is very scary but you will manage, it will be a rocky road for a while but you will come out the other side.
i had my op in 2005 and am currently fine.

Guest user
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Re: How do I cope?

Hi Lucy,

I'm 28 and I can hand on heart tell you that you WILL get through this...I've had some bad days over the last few months but I've also had some of the happiest days too. You'll find strength that you didn't know you had. My Aunty commited suicide in 2000 and it was the most painful time of my life...If you can get through the bad times you've been through you can get through this.

I had a mastectomy and reconstruction in March and I have the most fantastic boob - honestly it's like a boob job! Please remain positive and strong, laugh as much as you can and think about this time next year when this unexpected journey will all be over.

Lots of love
Kate
xxxxx

Re: How do I cope?

Hi Lucy

Like others have said you have been through so much it isn't fair. You have had yet another knock back in life. At the moment, your whole world has turned in on you, but you will find the energy to carry on. It seems somehow that some people get all the dreadful things happening to them and others escape from any form of tragedy. There is no answer to why, but you have been through the worst possible situations before, so you know you are able to get through this. Don't try to be a super hero. You need lots of time and support to get through this

Cathy
xxx

Guest user
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Re: How do I cope?

Hi Lucy

Sorry you have had to join us here on the forums. A BC dx sort of slaps you into an immediate state of shock - and of course we all think the worst case scenario. It's a lot to cope with and the next few weeks will be a roller coater of emotion for you & your family. As for coping - you just do, I don't know how but you just get on with it. Of course that's not to say it's easy - it's bl***y hard at times and you will get upset, annoyed, tearful etc. You will scream and shout and stamp your feet and that's fine, if that's how you get through then that's how you do it.

Whatever happens you can be assured of some fantastic support on this site. Whatever your question - and there is NO stupid questions - someone will have an answer. Apart from anything else this site is a great place to come and let of steam.

Good luck and let us know how you are getting on.

Love and hugs

Guest user
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Re: How do I cope?

HI Lucy

Almost just started on this road myself, what you are feeling is perfectly natural, you think you will never be able to think of anything else or even laugh again, but you will, you little girl will just have stronger mum bringing her up.
Just had a mastectomy not that bad really and waiting to hear whats next. You are going to be fine

Best Wishes

Debs x

Re: How do I cope?

Hi Lucy

I am so sorry to hear of your diagnosis, but you will get through this and enjoy your little baby girl too. At the moment it seems like a massive hill that you can not climb - but you can do it. We will all be here to support you. Break each bit down and it will become doable.
You will receive lots of advice and support from here. I was diagnosed July 2007 and have just finished rads - I have a 3 and 5 year old. Beleive me it is doable.
Please take care,love

Anne x

Guest user
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Re: How do I cope?

Hi Lisa
I know it will feel like the end of the world - but its not.
Use this forum and its many ears, to help you - let out your frustrations, fears - and share experiences.
I remember the day I found out - I cried like a baby.

You will find an amazing strength.
I am 42 on Tuesday, and I have a mastectomy on Monday - I found out a few weeks ago.

What you need to stay focused on is that it has been found - and now treatable.
Please keep talking to us....
Lisa X

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Re: How do I cope?

Hi Lucy
Hearing the news is never easy .I found out the day before my wedding last Oct and thought exactly like you how the hell do I get through this,and the only way for me was to cross one hurdle at a time,It has been tough at times but with good support from family and the lovely ladies here I am now seeing light.
Keep strong and ask questions, cry when you feel the need to and rest when your body tells you too and plenty of cuddles

Mary
xx

Guest user
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Re: How do I cope?

Hi Lucy,

I am so sorry to hear of your diagnosis, my heart goes out to you, life has a habit of throwing pretty awful things at you, my father died 5 days after I gave birth to his first grand child from cancer, the nurses said he waited until i had had my son to go, then six years ago my husband committed suicide, i was then diagnosed when i was pregnant with son no 6 when i was 32, that was 3 years ago, i had mastectomy and underwent chemo while pregnant and then radiotherapy after i had my son, sadly i had a recurrence only 8 months after finishing treatment.
I can imagine at the moment that your head and emotions are all over the place, the treatment is doable and the site has been a god send, the ladies on this site are amazing, u will never be alone and you will learn to live with your diagnoses, there will be good days aswell of bad, please keep in touch and if there is anything i can do for you just say

Wishing you all the best and loads of cyber hugs (((((((((( ))))))))))

Tina

Re: How do I cope?

Lisa - I had similar news yesterday .. Im 38, single with a little girl and it just hits you like a punch in the face - but i have psent time reading some of the posts on here - it really does help. Good luck with everything and stay strong for your little one xx

Re: How do I cope?

Hi Lisa
Big big hugs Lisa.
First of all your life isn't about to end although it probably feels like that at the moment.
When you are first diagnosed your emotions and thoughts are all over the place and with a new baby and the experiences that you've told us about you have done so well to come this far.
At the moment it has to one step at a time. Keep talking to people who will listen to you - friends family and on here where you will gets loads of support.
Everyone on here has at some time been given the news that you have been given and so they understand some of the feelings that are going through your head.
Where abouts do you live? they may be people in the area you can chat with - perhaps a support group or even people on here. There is a thread about - where do you come from - which might be helpful.
Keep chatting to us Lisa - I'm sure that there will be other young mums on the site who will pick up this thread.

Lots of love

Magsi x

Re: How do I cope?

Hi Lucy

Sorry that you have had to join us here but you will find that there is always someone to pick you up dust you down and help you on your way. What you are feeling at the moment is normal and it is very hard to see anything positive. It is very hard to take everything in at first but try to break it down into smaller pieces and not look at the big picture one step at a time is all you need at the minute. Any questions you wish to ask you shout out and someone will be on here to help you. You have already had a rough deal and it seems most unfair that you should have this to deal with as well. You will cope non of us think we will but we do mainly thanks to the wonderful people on this site. Take it easy.

Sending you love and hugs

Karen

Guest user
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Re: How do I cope?

Hi Lisa

Just logged on and wanted just to say hello. Diagnosis is a horrible horrible shock and what you are feeling right now is really normal...

We all find different ways of coping...for most people getting a treatment plan and finding out more about the kind of breast cancer they have can help. I am much older than you...sadly there are loads of young women who use this site, including women diagnosed with very young babies such as yourself. I am sure some of the will reply to your post soon.

You will be in shock for a while..go gently on yourself.

very best wishes

Jane

Re: How do I cope?

Hi Lisa

Welcome to the forums, I am sorry to read that you are going through such a difficult time, I am sure your fellow forum members will be along shortly with valuable support and advice.

Breast Cancer Care have published a Resource Pack, it has been designed for anyone newly diagnosed with information to help you better understand your diagnosis, test results and various treatments, it is available via the following link or by contacting the helpline:

http://www.breastcancercare.org.uk//content.php?page_id=7514

We also have information publications and services specifically for younger women which you may find helpful, you can read more via this link:

http://www.breastcancercare.org.uk/content.php?page_id=5256

You may find our helpline useful to call to talk through how you are feeling at the moment, they can talk to you about our other support services too and also offer support, information and a 'listening ear'. The number to call is 0808 800 6000 Monday - Friday, 9am - 5pm, Saturday, 9am - 2pm. I hope you find this helpful Lisa.

Best wishes
Lucy

How do I cope?

I have posted this on behalf of new user Lisa
Kind regards

Lucy

I'm not sure if I am in the right area for my comments, I've never been in a chat room before so sorry if I'm doing this wrong!!

I was diagnosed yesterday with breast cancer, I'm 32, married for 2 years and have a 9 week old baby girl called Lillie. I feel like my life has already ended and I'm not sure I'm going to be able to cope. I lost my Dad to suicide when I was 17 and my brother died in a car accident the day after I got back from my honeymoon, I've been pretty strong through all of that, but am a mess at the moment, and that's not like me. I love my life and I dont want it to end. How the hell do you cope with this?