How's everyone doing.?

[Silverlady]

Scotty - I've been looking at Amazon - the scarves are quite cheap and my sleeping hat is about £7.00, I intend to wear this under my scarf as added protection.  This means, hopefully, that it doesn't matter what material the scarf is, because to top it all off I get eczema and suffer from psoriasis on my head.

Honestly, I was not top of the list when they were making the perfect human being. 😂😀😀😀

[Silverlady]

Hahaha - it's normally when I'm making the car drift round corners - I wish 😂😂😂

[Scotty66]

Charl - the nearest one to me is at a Maggies centre miles away so you'll have to give group tutorials!!

Also live in jeans. You could set up a group Skype lessom on how to tie a scarf! I think the Youtube hits will be rocketing soon. I've been looking at anna bandana as they seem quite cheap - any other good sites out there?

[Emily T]

In my defense, susan started it, she said she did too lol!

[Strudel]

Emily, I swear only you could make yourself car sick as the driver!

Helena - just a hug x

[Charlotheraphy]

If it's available ladies you all should ask to be referred to 'Look Good Feel Better'. I'm not sure if it's national but I've been told it's lovely and you get loads of free expensive makeup! Got to be some perks right? Xx

[Silverlady]

Scotty - I am the least girlie female on this planet- I don't even own a dress or a skirt, but I do have waist length black curly hair which I tie up in a big bun. So I am looking how to tie a scarf with a bit of height and a bit down my neck. I've had to watch videos on line 😂😂

[Silverlady]

And sick on the train and also on planes. 

The one place I don't get sick on is the boat or in sea - how weird is that!

I'm just going to ask them for all the anti sickness pills there are 😂😂

I've already ordered a black sleeping cap in cotton and a purple and a black head scarf.  😀😀

[Scotty66]

In readiness for me becoming as bald as my lovely OH, I have started to look at scarves etc. As the least girly girl known to man these look bloody complicated. I can just about manage to put my hair up in a towel! I might need lesson and tips from the fashionistas among you - or just stick to a beanie until May!!

[Emily T]

I love a Susan post 😄

OMG you are like me, I'm sick for everything! I have to take travel pills to fly! I get car sick within half a mile!...and I have actually made myself car sick driving too!.. No wonder I also had op sickness lol!...I think Chemo might also do that too me, my track record isn;t very good.....I'd also go scarves, couldn't do a wig and I certainly couldn't cold cap, I read about it and was like oooo nooooo wayyyyyy!

[Silverlady]

Aaaagh - I posted before I was finished.

Alex, that's great news that you don't have to go back to work yet. Enjoy your Rose.

Zena - take all the help you can get, in fact, play on it 😂😂😂😂 have a lovely evening.

[Silverlady]

AnnCann - big hugs, I've got to have chemo, but have cheered myself up looking online for all the beautiful scarves and hats I'm going to buy.

Charl - hahaha, love your wig adventure, I can see why you and Strudel get on, she's nuts as well 😂😂

Scotty, that's how I want to be before my chemo.  I'm not worried about my hair, eyebrows etc, just about being sick.  I'm a wuss when I'm sick. I hope it all goes well for you.

Jane - I was told that I would have to have chemo from my first meeting, then as my results turned out to be a lot better, I was worried that the weren't going to give it to me.  But, they were always going to give it to me as my cancer was aggressive.  Now, I'm jealous of the ladies that have the onco testing and you, who don't have to have it.  While I was there the surgeon told me I was cancer free and then in the next breath told me that if it comes back they will just cut it out again (not sure if I felt that was reassuring or not - still absorbing that one) I have moved over and there's plenty of room in my kryptonite pants for you. Sending you huge big hugs. 

Emily - that's what I'm a bit worried about on Monday when I go back to work - how tired I will be.  But I am looking forward to returning as I love my job.  I will try and upload a picture of Lincoln.  As usual, your stories are brill, that one brought a big smile to my face 😂😂 Don't you worry about chemo, I get travel sick, coach sick, vertigo, car sick (sometimes when I'm driving myself) I was sick whilst pregnant, I got sick from the anesthetic and the morphine, so we will manage together - I also want to be able to swap scarf tips 😂

Helena - it sounds like you are getting sore.  I hope the Hello Vera works and that you have a good nights rest.    A big huggle for you tonight my lovely friend. ❤️

Jo - have a lovely night with your daughter.

Strudel - huge big hugs for you, I'm bored at home as well. I hope you feel better once you've chatted to your BCN.

EM 67 aka Emma, are you o.k, we haven't heard from you for a couple of days? 

Hugs go and love to everyone.

Susan

[zena75]

Jo - what if he has go fangs and stuff then youll be sorry ..

ARM around you .. HOW COMFORTING !!!

men have no idea do they, bless him..

I have been told to def expect chemo so I know how you feel , but how we trick ourselves into little safe places sometimes in our minds and act all confident on the outside !! still a shock, every new thing is, takes time to compute every tiny (BIG) thing.

when bcn told me MRI better before op which was what id been told on friday last) as may be small enough for lumpectomy I was thrilled and then she ended with and dr wants to see if its in the other breast !!

Just got distracted then by my friend texting for the 3rd time today "do I need her to take my kids to school ?"

she first text at 8 am this morning .... everyone trying to take my life off me 'HELP',  makes me feel loved and slightly angry as Im still here!!!!!!!! 

 Ladies love the funny stories .... wigs, badgers ,consultants,veins, husbands, friends and us xxxxx

[Emily T]

Ooo Alex...cheers, I'm on the rose! Couldn;t help myself tonight

I think most employers are very sympathetic and I have to say, although I have said I will work through radiotherapy I am now considering not! It might just be less stressfull as I have a 40 minute journey each way!

[Alex1967]

Well plucked up the courage to ring work as my sick note runs out on 6th and was due back for a shift on 8th (don't see the consultant until the 10th for diagnosis confirmation!) so thought what's the point in going back for 2 shifts then potentially off again - they were SO lovely and totally understand and already have my shifts covered for the next 6 weeks! I do plan on going back depending on treatment plan in between but another worry ticked off ✅ Now where's that glass of rose? 👍🏻

[Jo C]

Scotty, definitely anxiety twins. Good luck tomorrow and please let us know how it goes. xx

Strudel, sorry you are feeling anxious. I get what you mean about going back to work. I've driven myself mad at home.

Charl, giggling at your wig moment 😂 and also your Minerva coil...wasn't she a character in Harry Potter.

EmilyT, well done in your day at work. I contacted my boss today to see whether I should do a bit of work during treatment and she told me to stay off and treat it like a 'mid-career Subaru all!' Made me feel a bit better about the work/not work anxiety.

Helena, hope you have a restful evening and a good night's sleep.

I'm doing a little bit of gin teasing with my 18 yo daughter as a treat. xx

[Scotty66]

ladybowler - get a good nights kip x

Jo - I think we are the anxiety twins!

Strudel - thanks!

Hopefully I'll post tomorrow with the first one out of the way and be badgering you all for advice !

[Emily T]

Don't you think that the small things that would never have normally bothered you become major issues for no apparant reason?

[zena75]

Aw H we will be waiting hun, till tomorow z.xxx

[Strudel]

Charl that's hilarious - you poor sod!

Sorry Helena - that just tickled me!

Hi AnnCann, I remember you well. Waiting's the pits. I'm ok thanks.

Em, well done for surviving work. I return next week.

Jane, totally get it. Having moaned at Charl earlier I phoned my BCN and am going to see her tomorrow for a chat. She's totally fabulous. I just feel anxious about all sorts of things. It will do me good to get back to work I think. I'm also getting seriously bored now.

Scotty - good luck for tomorrow!

[Jo C]

Jane and Ann, big hugs. I feel like I am THE most anxious person in the world. My lovely consultant sat on the bed with his arm round me all the time he was talking to me today. Made me feel so much better! He has a wicked sense of humour though. I asked if the oncologist was nice (terrible fear of putting trust in new people) and he told me he was horrible with fangs and claws and everything. I though my humour was dark!!

I was told initially that I might not need chemo and I asked if I could have it anyway just to make sure. I was told,"No!" Then I found out I needed chemo and was upset. I sometimes think that I would worry no matter what and if I had no reason to worry I would make it up!

[Emily T]

Cross posted Jane....and I am anxious because I don;t know if I should be worried about having chemo or not!!!

Take care hun xxx

[AnnCann]

Haha... in my post it should read it DOESN'T matter what we are told.....

[Emily T]

Oh Ive missed everything being at work, I almost sat and took notes so I could respond to everyone 

But I have thoroughly enjoyed reading through the thread, its made my day. lol! 

Pam OMG hugely pleased for you xxxxxxxxxxxx

I'm cheating, going to open 2 windows so I can reply to everyone lol!

Ann, lovely to see you. I also struggle with anxiety and I feel for you. I'm on the better side of results so its easier, I think you will find after the 12th you will be able to relax a bit more.

Patricia, I think rotting kind of works for cancer...sorry, too dark?? 

Susan, hows your doggy? Can you put a pic up, I want to love him from afar, I miss having a dog, I know I have naggys but its not the same......I do have a Chinchilla called Yoda though...hes quite a dude.

Zena, I sooooooo know what you mean about being cared for......I just love this site and you guys

Alex, not too long now then xx

Jo..fanbloodytastic, such a lovely feeling isn;t it xxx Onwards and upwards

Sarah lovely to see you. Not sure if I have just missed you post but it feels like ages since I spoke to you.

OMG now I'm lost, although the 2nd open page worked a treat

Stru, my day was fraught and tiring but ok....I got fed up with being asked how I was and doing the whole "I'm fine! Better than I was thanks...la .la .la" I bored myself!.....it was a bit stressy with some stuff going on too and trying to catch up a bit was hard so I am shattered, but all in all not terrible and its nice to do something.

Ok my turn for a funny story. When discussing my radiotherapy with someone they told me their husband had had to have it because he had testicular cancer!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Made me go cross eyed lol!

[AnnCann]

Big hug coming your way Jane... I am feeling anxious this week too... I am
Anxious cause I need to have chemo! It does matter what we are told the anxiety continues but I take courage from some of the ladies on this site who are further along and tell us that it gets better.... 😊Xx

[EJM60]

Susan - that's a brilliant list of where we all are. Glad Lincolns responding to treatment now. 

Great news from you Pam.

Hope your day has been ok Em.

Good news from your scan Jo - hope your anxiety has lessened a bit today. 

Helena - been told to get E45 and Hello Vera too!!

Ive had my ct scans in preparation for radiotherapy starting on 16th January for 4 weeks.  I'm proud of my first tattoos at 56 years old!! Although the one inbetween my breasts looks like an inflamed blackhead at the moment!

I dont know why but I'm struggling with anxiety big time this week, part of me thinks I should be really happy that I didn't need chemotherapy, but I'm now worrying about the whats if something has been missed.  Especially when everyone seems to be oncotype tested and my oncologist said it wasn't needed, even though my insurance company were happy to pay for it.  I'm back to wanting to curl up in a ball in bed.  Will one of you come and give me a shake and tell me to pull myself together. There's no way I could do my job at the moment - can't deal with my own emotional needs let alone deal with the needs of others. 

Jane x

[Scotty66]

Silver

9:00 for me. Good to get going early I reckon. Feeling surprisingly calm at the mo x

[Charlotheraphy]

I would never avoid the thread! I'm not sure I could keep up if I missed a few days. I too was told I had cancer after mammogram and Scan. I cried in the poor radiographer for at least an hour whilst cross examining her on what would happen to me!! If it wasn't so tragic I think it would have made a funny sketch on a comedy show.

I was also told to take out my Minerva Coil after they found out I was ER+. Had my first period in 8 years last week but due to chemo it only lasted a day so not so bad.

Anyways I have a tale to make you all laugh. The other day I was having an enjoyable morning with my youngest whilst my eldest was out at a party and hubby at work. I completely forgot that we had made an appointment to have a small piece of carpet replaced. Carpet man rings the doorbell and I'm frantically running around the house looking for the front door keys whilst shouting for him not to leave. I couldn't find said keys so grabbed my wig and had to let him in through the garage as they were nowhere to be seen. Anyway after apologising profusely for being in my pjamas still and having to let him in via the garage I went back downstairs to make carpet man a cuppa. At which point my youngest came in saying 'Mommy what have you done to your hair?' I thought she was just asking why I was wearing the wig but when i eventually made it to the bathroom I realised I had put the wig on completely the wrong way round 😂😂😂😂🤣. Needless to say Carpetman finished the job in world class speed!!!

Cancer is crap but it can't break out sense of humour!!

[AnnCann]

Hello all you lovely ladies,

I have been out of it for a while but following the messages and laughing at some of your posts. I am still struggling with anxiety. I have my second appointment with oncologist on 12th Jan the one I saw on 29th Dec is leaving the Trust 😀, so appointment with another oncologist has been made. Waiting for results of CT and bone scans... will get results on 12th Jan.

Strudel, how are you doing? I remember we had our oPs on the same day... thank you so much again to all you ladies who sent me encouraging messages of support recently. I will try to keep up with you ladies but with my jelly brain its difficult... hugs to all... xx

[Silverlady]

Very true Sarah 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

[Sallyann43]

Tough titty in our case Silver 😂😂😂😂😂😂

[Silverlady]

Scotty - what time is your chemo tomorrow? Good luck, I'll be thinking of you.

Hahaha - Alex it's so good to laugh. Although I tend to find the most inappropriate things funny and have a very dark humour- I think it's called graveside humour, I have to rein it in so that I don't upset anybody.  But since I've had BC I don't keep check of it anymore - tough titties if they don't like it 😂😂😂😀😀

Ali - I hope you're back soon and not stuck in the queue for too long.

[Alex1967]

LOL at Ali....... visions!

I wonder if "in limbo" would be acceptable to put on my sick note 😂

[Alex1967]

Now to get an extension of my sick note as really still can't face work - can't face it at the best of times never mind just at the moment  🙄

[ali1961]

Literally laughing out loud at you guys while in the CT queue. Nurse walked past and said "Someone's happy". I did feel a bit of an outlier as I think today is the bad pathology queue. I'll report back later

Ali x

[Alex1967]

Zena - sorry not sure how to even allow myself to get private messages! Thought I was quite tech savvy but can't even find where private messages are! I'll blame my fuzzy head at the moment lol

[Alex1967]

Thanks girls - just been out for lunch with my husband and his business partner who has prostrate cancer and we did have a laugh - he is on estrogen due to his prostrate cancer being driven by testosterone and said he now likes shopping for handbags with his wife 😂😂 Laughing does help! PS my dog went down a badger set today - had to pull her out but did laugh (again) after reading the badger incident earlier! Good job no one saw me chuckling to myself in woods ---->😜 Screening department rang me back and said 2.30pm on Tues 10th with consultant breast surgeon for follow up - I sensed she couldn't wait to get off the phone in case I asked for results!!! Oh well let's get this plan in place and let's rock and roll x

[Strudel]

Patricia, hmm, bit pants. Personally I would have it done to be sure as I don't ever want to wonder "what if" but these decisions are hard. Dreading the oncotype discussion as it involves a decision! Good luck with whatever you decide.

Silver, so glad you're back with us - I know you only disappeared for a few days but it felt longer!

Jo, doing a little happy dance for you 😊

Ali - how you feeling?

I know how Charl is cos I unloaded on her this morning - she may avoid this thread today to get a break from me 😄

Alex I meant to say that you'll be advised about the coil when you get your results.

Emily - if you have the energy come and tell us how you got on back at work.

[Silverlady]

Hahaha Patricia, I love predictive text, it so much more interesting.

Jo - I missed your comment as I was posting mine at the same time - excellent results, you must feel so relieved.

Sarah - I nearly missed you as well.  My stiffness is just under where my boob would have been, it's like I'm wearing a bra that is a bit too tight.  I know how you're feeling about the results, I just resigned myself that if it was in my lymph nodes, they would take them out. I always try to think of the worse possible senerio and then it could only get better. This worked up till the night before and then I would collapse in a heap of fear and doubt, imagining that they would find it all over my body and as you know, I would come on here and you and the others would comfort me. We will be there for you, ready to catch you. Big bear hugs are now presently coming down the motorway and will surround you with love and comfort. 

[Patriciamay]

Yes me and the spell checker I of course meant "rooting" for us.

[Silverlady]

Hello my lovely ladies,

I've just updated the list with all the new details.  We could do with it being pinned so we don't have to go looking for it.

Alex - I'm so sorry hun, I didn't mean to miss you off.  Big hugs to you. I wish I could give you and Zena a proper hug and take your fears away. I was also told by the radiologist at my biopsy that it was cancer and serious.  In a way, I'm glad she did now, as by the time I went for my results I had got use to the idea and could ask further questions. 

Helena - only 11 to go, it seems to be going down so quickly. Loved the Hello Vera 😂😂😂

Patricia -  You did make me giggle when you said you were rotting for us - I had am image of you standing out in the garden all wet & soggy.

My darling Strudel - you really brighten my day, you and Emily are so funny. I didn't pick up on the Hello Vera until you pointed it out. I love your googling 😂😂😂

I have also also found the true meaning of happiness and would recommend it to all you ladies - Abba's greatest hits blasting out and a few Abba dances on the way to the kettle. I am the ultimate Dancing Queen or was till my knees failed me 😂😂😂😂😂

[zena75]

Thank you girls, how fabulous is this site/feed...  I feel reasured, cared about and understood , its amazing so thank you xxxx

[Jo C]

Wow Susan, you really are the oracle. I have read where everyone is up to and forgotten again already! I have never been good with names at the best of times but can't keep up at all at the minute.

I got my results today. All clear apart from a benign looking lesion in my liver which will be confirmed with MR at some point but the consultant isn't worried about it and treatment will commence as planned. I feel weepy with relief as I had convinced myself of the worst. I used to be a CT radiographer and have seen so much pathology over the years that I couldn't believe that my scan would be normal. Talk about irrational. Oncology appointment next week and hopefully start chemo week after.

Big hugs to Sarah, Ann and Zena whilst you are still playing the waiting game.

Jane, hope your day in Radiology has been ok.

Fantastic that some of you are working. What a string brave lot we are really (although it doesn't always feel that way!).

Big hugs to Lincoln who is hopefully on the mend.

I know I haven't remembered everyone as I have brain fuzz but I think you are all wonderful ladies xxx

[Patriciamay]

Hi Strudle

i am having an MRI because they identified an additional lesion making me a "multi focal" BC.  This wasn't identified until the day of surgery.  A long story but basically the radiologist didn't bother to biopsy as he thought it was benign.  This means I should have an MRI, as it's part of the pathway, and should have had it prior to surgery.  I don't think they expect to find anything, but you know you can't be sure.  I just know it is already adding to my stress levels, and I am seriously thinking of refusing.  As I said I have had a 2d scan, a 3D scan, and an USS.  The radiologist isn't convinced it's needed.  I feel anxious just thinking about it.  I just want to get on with my Rads.  I can't start this until they have done the MRI.

[Sallyann43]

Hi guys x

Zena - I think I'm fairly close to you in diagnosis, grade 2 invasive lobular cancer .. I wouldn't worry too much about timescales as I was told I had bc on 28th oct and had my op on 22nd Dec .. I also had an MRI scan and it seems to be standard procedure for lobular c ...

Silver - I was only stiff after the op for about 4 days, since then I've been fine ... I haven't done any arm exercises cos there hasn't been any stiffness or limited movement. It's almost like it all didn't happen now (apart from I definitely know I only have one boob 😂) waiting for full results next Tuesday and scared to bloody death for those ... I know I'm er + and her2- I think it's the whole lymph node thing that's scaring me, I don't want to have more surgery 😢
Your list is amazing ... haha .. I love it when you come on here and announce where we are all up to ..
Waiting to hear from jo and Jane - hope all has gone well today xxx

[Strudel]

Silver, the true goddess of updates - thank you. So pleased to hear your dog's doing better.

Helena, is "hello Vera" a particularly friendly form of moisturiser or have you just fallen foul of predictive text? 😂

Pam - great news, congrats

Patricia, hello again. Sorry about the in laws, why do you have to have an MRI?

Alex, hello and welcome. One thing I've learnt is that all hospitals do things slightly differently. I had all of the initial tests done at my first appointment. They said at the end of that day that they were 99% sure it was BC and the biopsy results would confirm it which it did. My radiologist didn't tell me I had cancer but he asked me if I'd brought anyone with me and as I left him said "all the best then," so I pretty much knew. My hospital refuses point blank to tell you any results over the phone - good or bad. Have you got your follow up appt?

Well my onc appt came through today for next Tuesday. Shouldn't have googled the oncologist that's for sure. Whilst googling the surgeon showed a man a few steps off sainthood, the onc Google suggested a butcher. Hmmm. I try to derive comfort from the fact it was the Daily Mail.

[Emily T]

OMG Susan, I'm going to print that out! and add Alex 😄

Zena ER+ means that your cancer is fed by oestrogen, I am ER+ and will be going on Tamoxifen for 10 years.

I have a coil and have been told I should have it removed but no rush. If your cancer is hormone responsive then they don't want you putting more hormones into your body. Alex wait until you know.

[Alex1967]

* suppose I asked still