I HATE PINK!

[feistyflora]

Thanks. Still, it is all in the past and that particular emotional drainer has had her marching orders, which is probably why I feel a hundred times happier nowadays! Perhaps we could stage a counter-revolution and make ourselves some T-shirts saying "Cerise Pink Stinks" but then we might upset the kiddies who love Barbie. Calling those fliers "some crap about crying" - oh you did make me laugh - tee-hee-hee ! 

[kbmd]

Hey Feisty,

So sorry about the insensitive friend.  Can't imagine what she was thinking.  But to join this rant... I hate pink (always have), and I am also feeling overwhelmed by unwanted reminders everywhere.  Internet ads, magazines promoting the next best treatment center for cancer, television -- it's everywhere.  I know it helps to raise money but I have mixed feelings about this too... I read long ago (pre-BC for me) that many cancer organizations have more money than they can spend on research so it is invested.  I guess that's why I got this stupid envelope filled with "support group fliers" and a handkerchief with a pink ribbon embroidered with note saying some crap about crying.  Really?  Really?  Just made me feel like punching the idiot who decided on that campaign.  How about spending money on things that make a difference?  How about providing rides to treatments, how about reimbursement for costs not covered by insurance?  How about paying for complimentary care like nutrition classes, massage, counseling, reiki or yoga, acupuncture --- there are so many options and I get a hanky???? 

As for friends... I have learned to be very selfish about who is allowed in my "inner circle" and it sounds like you're learning the same.  Focus and treasure the real supporters and distance yourself from the emotional drainers.

[feistyflora]

Feeling rather cynical at the moment - "pink fluffy girls" certainly do have fun. That 'cancer' colour gets you lots of attention, a point not lost on a 'friend'  (but no longer) who chose that to wear the first time we went out together to a real ordinary quiet do, right after my op, and no, I don't believe she chose the colour to be 'supportive'. I felt so upset  - it was glaringly obvious that she had made a supreme effort to look extra, extra good. Why, on that particular day of all days??? The contrast between us couldn't have been greater. She looked fantastic. I looked like something the cat had dragged in, and felt it too. I was so depressed . Had she done it in innocence? Could anyone really be so insensitive? I didn't think so. Couldn't she have toned things down a bit in the circumstances? Men in particular told her how attractive she was looking. (They don't analyse things like we do so it probably didn't occur to them to think "oh that's a bit unkind when her friend has just had cancer and is not feeling too good" - although another woman might.) She positively basked in their compliments . I was totally ignored. I felt like the invisible woman ! Some friend huh?

[feistyflora]

I am a 'glass-half-full sort of person but I feel exactly like everyone else on this thread.  Sometimes, when I am out and about and enjoying myself, just for a few minutes I actually manage to forget that I have breast cancer and then I see logos or slogans on lorries passing on the motorway, lapel buttons in shops, adverts in supermarkets, etc, etc - they are everywhere. Although I know it is all for a 'good cause' it is a constant reminder of what I have been through!  I know it is illogical and then I feel a bit ungrateful and guilty for thinking like this . The young girls and 'pert boobs' bit doesn't bother me though - they may be giggly and laughing but they too have probably lost someone close and at least they are making an effort on our behalf.

[Helm]

It's just part of the goal of getting people to donate and be aware of BC - branding or having something identifiable is important - and it does work! I'm not personally a fan of the colour, but I do appreciate that it gets the message across.

However, I do think businesses could do more in terms of donations. I've been helping my Goddaughter start a new company (when I have the energy and don't feel crap from the meds I'm on which is pretty much most of the time) and we actually pledged to donate 20% of profit. Not trying to blow our own trumpet here, Just pointing out what I believe. Fair enough if their donations are spread out across a number of charities. But often if you look at the small print what they donate isn't much. Still, on the other hand every penny counts!

[jannie13]

I know we need fund raising and awareness but I would like a day when I'm not faced with it at every till bus stop ...and the back of a loo door saying their is no cure...that was hard to take after the lingerie department.

[venice25]

loved your reply Jomar really tickled me my sort of humour love Gill x

[NAZ]

No we are not knocking research funding, you are right there JETS. I quite liked pink too, but since BC and two reconstructive surgeries, which have left huge scarring and an essentially numb mound, I fail to see what is pink and fluffy about our suffering. Oh well, October is ages away thank goodness!! Xxxx

[JETS]

Ps - I know no one is knocking research funding here - rereading my post wouldn't want to give that impression x

[JETS]

Ahhh now you see my dilemma is I love pink! One of my favourite colours .... But since BC in nov I am also battling with pink brigade fatique on fb x I'm happy for every penny to research and happy to swallow the hypocrisy if it stops other ladies losing both breasts like me. However, I am 100% behind the stronger message - I think the pink fluffy "girls have fun" image can be unintentionally very damaging for those of us trying to recover and hiw we are viewed by others - I have had many inappropriate jokes and comments which in pretty sure wouldn't come my way if I had leukaemia or some other kind of cancer- also God knows how men cope with a diagnosis with all the gender stereotype that this causes x

[NAZ]

Very apt Jomar.. but this is the reality, whether people find it funny or not!

Lets get real !

[Jomar]

It brings out the devil in me and my sick humour.  I wanted to pop out my chewed up fake boob and say 'there you go. I donated that to breast cancer'.  

Not many people find me funny and i didnt have time to get arrested : )

[NAZ]

Totally agree with you apple street! Surely BC awareness means just that, being  made AWARE! Think its time that some changes were made regarding BC month.. the scars, the mangled breasts, the pain (phyiscal and emotional) need to be exposed once and for all!

Naz xx

[bella60]

totally with you on that point

[bella60]

 Totally agree with what every one is saying. Obviously breast cancer is a very emotive subject, but it is  not pink and fluffy.By promoting it as such i think they are taking the p*@^^, which is not very nice.Maybe we are all so good at hiding the pain, the suffering, the fear and the loneliness,they think we do not mind, but I do!!

[applestreet]

Cancer isn,t pink and fluffy I think of it as a big ugly cactus all prickly and horrible but the pink thing raises money for research so I try to go with it everyone is different but if Ibsaw young lasses with perky boobs collecting I would be tempted to show my mw scar to let them see the reality! There should be pictures of mangled boobs and scarred chests on adverts for BC they put things on ciggie packs so why not show the reality of what we have to live with!

[Jomar]

I did find the gang of beautiful and bubbly young girls with their pert breasts in pik cowboy hats a little irritating and more suitable to advertising a hen weekend than collecting for breast cancer.  

But then I am a bit crabby sometimes 

[booksandwine]

Hi I did email them and asked them why had tried to email the local dept store got a press speak reply from corporate office "how good are we" kinda overlooked the point I cannot buy bras at the store

[whiskers2013]

Hi ladies, slightly different gripe with me. I know all my friends mean well but if I don't write it here I am likely to get into a massive fb rant like I did last year. I just really really don't get all these 'share this'blah blah post. whilst the whole selfie share did raise alot of money and my feed was full of lots of beautiful make up free ladies I choose to donate and share a breast check post. I chose not to share myself wigless and make up free cos the harsh reality is I couldn't as I looked and felt horrific. Anyway the latest one is 'set your Tata's free go braless for breast cancer awareness week' I mean is it me or does that one really take the p*ss. I only have one boob for Christ sake 😞 my bra holds my other one in place.

[Jenny065]

Hello Ladies,  I have just opened my weekly local paper, and guess what. PINK-  all the heading on front cover is in pink, then inside a section all about "Think Pink",  it is nice that they are supporting us, but they are donating just 2p from each paper sold, -costs£1. and  10%  from the procedes of all adverts -they hope to raise £2500.  OK every little helps,  but it comes across as look at us, look how much we are doing. feel like saying just donate the full amount or at least 50 % just for one week. or am I expecting too much.          Anyway I'm off for coffee tomorrow morning and taking my teddy bear -at least one of them  maybe more, as it is "Teds Big Day Out" tomorrow,- raising money for our nearest main hospital- the one that has helped me. 

Take Care,

Jenny.x

[Jenny065]

Hello Ladies,  have to agree with you about places like BHS,Debenhams etc, and the adverts in the colour supplement with the paper yesterday - ALL Pink-  and look what we  are donating ----"pence",  only about 5% or very little not the full amount, they will still make a big profit,  and at our wexpense.  Oops sorry i better get off my soapbox.  On a differeny note, I know where loads of money was raised last Weds-At the Breast Cancer Care Fashion Show in London,  I was very very lucky to be given a ticket - it was fantastic. 

Take Care everyone.

Huggles, jenny.

[NAZ]

Time to email them i think booksandwine and ask them why!!!

[booksandwine]

agree I am not a big fan either - but I really really find it !!$$%£ when large stores such as BHS and Debenhams here locally are promoting they are supporting BCC month but dont stock any Masectomy products!!!

[NAZ]

Exactly Lottie! x

[lottie63]

Hi Naz

            Hmmm only things pink about bc for me are..... 1/ my face with the constant hot flushes from tamoxifen and

2/ my poor booby from rads and subsequent lymphodema 

xx.....

[NAZ]

Damm pink is everywhere! Asda, the town and now even the organisation i work for, has decked the site out in PINK and PINK RIBBONS! YUK!

Sorry, but as i was looking at my poor scarred and numb breast last night and thinking my mammogram is due soon, i see nothing PINK about any aspect of BC!

NAZ