I'm stopping active treatment

I have had four and a half cycles of vinorelbine and my CT scan last week showed still not progression to major organs but slight worsening of tumours in my neck and chest wall (slight worsening is on top of significant progression on last scan in December). I had a long talk with my oncologist on the phone on Thursday and will see her on Tuesday. Both she and I agree that the vinorelbine probably worked for the first three cycles but is now failing (the thing with tumours you can see and feel and which cause lymphoedema is that you can easily monitor them clinically).

So I have used all the standard treatments for triple negative breast cancer (AC, taxotere, xeloda, vinorelbine, carboplatin, gemcitibine, taxol and vinorelbine a second time.) The drugs which are available on trial or in other countries which could be used include avastin, sutent, abraxane, ixempra…none of which have good trial results particularly in heavily treated cancers. I could try pegylated doxuribycin, a version of the C in AC which failed spectacularly at primary stage for me. I could go seeking a PARP trial at the Marsden but have decided its not for me (Phase 1 trials are about testing dosage and side effects and have tiny statistical chance of significant success…if I were younger or had children I might go for one.)

Instead I have decided that I want to take well time as far as I can now. If I continue on chemotherapy, continuing to experience severe fatigue half the time, then when I get further spread I will be too ill to enjoy the time I have left. So I see the coming time as a ‘window of opportunity’ to take some holidays, get on with my ‘to do’ list.

The spread of my cancer has been unusual…an aggressive cancer has turned out to be ‘indolent’ and bought me more time than I dared to hope for 5 and a half years ago. I know that fairly soon my lymphoedema arm will get heavier, that eventually I may lose use of it, that the deferred pain I get in my back and the twinges from tumours will get worse, so then I’ll go for the ‘management’ route. I hope my half strength voice, damaged by tumours, won’t get any worse…as has been promised…

I am in many ways wary of posting all this because when I started to explore it on another thread recently I felt I was criticised. Hope is so often equated only with the search for more treatments, but I think sometimes hope has to be reframed and looked for in different ways…which is what I am doing…hoping for management of my symptoms, hope that my major organs stay free of cancer for as long as possible, hope that the regional tumours don’t fungate yet, hope they don’t yet squash my lungs, hope I can have a good summer, so many hopes. I don’t play ‘guess the time I have left’ game with my oncologist…she doesn’t know and neither do I. Always it could be within six months or more or less…for each of us with mets. I believe for myself that the decision I am taking gives me the chance of the best quality time I can get.

My partner is with me on this and we both feel relieved. Sadly I didn’t get scan results until after my chemo on Thursday (they had got lost between radiologist and oncologist) so I am having one (last) exhausted chemo weekend. If in future I get bone mets or brain mets I will take treatments for them, but I think my chemo days are over…

Jane

Hi Jane, I’m so sorry that the treatments haven’t been of more help to you. I think that any decision that you come up with has to be the right one, for you. I can understand you feeling relieved, more confirmation that it’s right for you. My situation is different - dx Oct 2.5cm Grade 3 10/18 nodes involved. I had WLE and node clearance, now having 3xFEC and 3XTax - last one on 2nd April then 15 Rads then Tamoxifen. I don’t know your history but I do know what a god-awful disease this is and the devastating effects it has on everyone. All I can say is that I wish you, and your partner all the best. I think you’re right about hope, since my diagnosis my version of what hope means has been ever-changing. I’m hopeful that my situation has a positive outcome, none of us know what the future holds, we can only take it as it comes and deal with it in our own, individual way. I hope you enjoy many, many great holidays and I’m sure there are good times ahead. love and hugs Pat x

I think what you are going to do sounds very sane and sensible, Jane, and I hope you have many happy holidays and times ahead of you. There obviously comes a point when the treatments have to be assessed against all the side effects and long term efficacy of them. I suppose some people want to continue chemo even when it’s not really working because they would feel scared to be having nothing - perhaps years of treatment gives its own dependency. My very best wishes to you, I always like to read your posts - so keep them coming!

Jane, I think that’s probably me you are referring to when you felt criticised. That was i think a different context, and i can see no reason for criticism or disagreement here. I am sorry that the chemo has ceased to work for you, and it certainly sounds like you have tried a hell of a range here, and been through an awful lot.

I think the holidays and ticking off the to do list sounds great, and i hope you’ve got some really great destinations to go to.

I’ve always found a holiday revitalises me, and I almost feel normal, so i hope that you’ll feel better on hols too.

As i’ve said before Jane, we cannot afford to miss out for too long on your posts so make sure it’s short breaks or there is wifi!

Take care - i’m off to Tunisia in the morning, would you like me to check it out?

Jane I hope your quality of life improves now…and you get some time to enjoy life, the summer. I used to think I would try anything to sqeeze more time here but I’m now older and perhaps a (little) wiser and feel my quality of life is now the most important priority.
I went to a family funeral this week, my Uncle had leukemia and lived well for some time with his illness but he didn’t want his quality of life to decline so made some decisions on just when to stop all active treatment. The end was swift and peaceful. He was an inspiration to me and I feel I’ve learnt much from meeting him so often during his illness…we always seemed to book the same hospital days!
I think I can almost feel the sense of relief from your posting.
Take Care! Belinda…xx

Hi Jane,
It sounds like you’ve made a very clearly thought-out decision to me and obviously tried so many chemo options.I’ve always believed that quality of life not length of life is the most important.
I hope you enjoy planning and going on holidays and ticking off your “to do” list. Do keep the posts coming.
I’m on a chemo break at the mo and feel so much better for it but know it may beckon again but there may well come a point when I’ve had enough. Thankyou for being so honest and open about it all.
Anne

Take care Jane and thank you for your helpful comments to me

Other Jane x

Jane you are doing what is right for you so no-one has the right to stand in any sort of judgement on you.

For my part I wish you every ounce of enjoyment you can get out of life, and I’ll look forward to hearing all your ‘to do’s’ as they get done…go girl!!

Take care, big hugs, Di xxx

Hello Jane
I don’t ususally post very often on your posts because you have such a way with words that I always feel you have said everything that needs to be said. (I only wish I could be the same) I am much better speaking to people face to face.
You have always posted when I have had problems which is why I just wanted to say that I am sure you have not made this decision lightly and I should imagine that In some ways there will be a sense of relief.
Make sure that you book up something nice to to do and enjoy your time without the chemo effects
love CAroline

Jane

They are forecasting a really good summer this time round and let’s hope that for once they are right and you get your time in the sun free from treatment side effects.
It was good to see you on Friday. Look after yourself
x
Barbara

Jane

Good luck and I hope you and your partner have a wonderful summer. I was on tax last summer and I can’t bear the thought of being on chemo this summer. I am waiting for the results of bone scans/xrays to see how my mets are doing.

Celeste- I really fancy Tunisa (love desert scenary)let me know about your hol and have a great time.

Sue

Hi Jane,

I am really not surprised to read your post and I too wish you a fantastic summer and lots of ‘ticks’ on your to do list.

I am one of the more ‘cherleader’ type forum members that is alway possitive and wants a good news story HOWEVER I have always been of the mind quality over quantity.

I do have a young family and have just celebrated my 40th but chemo always made me so ill that I could never understand what was so brilliant about living a few more months if you sleep through it and I don’t want my children to remember me always ill and grumpy.

It has been really refreshing for me to read your post…yeh… there you go Jane… you have just become a huge inspiration to me.

Do you feel as though a very heavy weight has been lifted from your shoulders?..

Anyway I shall end my post now before I start on the ‘well done you, how courageous…’

Tongue in cheek

Bikinggirl.X

Jane
I understand completely where you are coming from. Quality of life versus extra time with loved ones. Ian and I have had several chats in the past few weeks about this. Well I will be honest, I have chatted he has listened with tears in his eyes.
Taxol and avastin have bought me an extra 12 months so far, but the tiredness, loss of freedom, inability to walk further than bed and bathroom all has to weighed up. I jumped the scan queue and high jacked onc on Friday and I am having a chemo break. If my recovery from chemo is not evident in the next 6 weeks I will know it is down to the aggression of the cancer. Then I may or may not go back on chemo.
Enjoy your chemo break and have lots of wonderful memory making time with your loved one. It is the one thing we can leave to them that will stay with them when we can’t
Love Debsxxx

Hello Jane,

Just sending love. Hope you are enjoying the sunshine.

Sharon x

Jane

As always you give everything much thought so we all know this is not a rushed or rash decision. Enjoy the sunshine and get on with the ‘to-do’ list as soon as possible, last chemo permitting!

Nicky x

Dear Jane
A hard decision to make but I guess priorities change. Here’s hoping you have a wonderful summer
big hug

No-one can criticise you for doing what is right for you - we all have to choose our own path through this. I hope the sun is shining on you (literally and metaphorically). I am sure many people on this forum have always welcomed your no-nonsense approach.

Love,
Jane
x

I’m now you wont have tushed inot this decision lightly - glad you are confident enough in your own mind and have the support of a strong partner - good for you - get on an enjoy some chemo free time.

Gerry

Hi Jane,
I for one would never criticise you for making what is a very sensible decision for you and your partner, it is a very hard road you and others including myself are going down, and i hope when my time comes to make that decision i will make the right one and remember that quality of life sometimes has to come before quantity.
Younger women with children might prefer quite naturally that they want to have the most time possible but when your children are grown or you don’t have children then it is different.
I have to say that with you making this decision and dippy kate ill in hospital, it makes me feel so sad because although i don’t know any of you personally you get attached to certain people reading their posts, you get the feeling you know them. Anyway Jane i hope you will still be posting for a long time to come.
Love Reneexx

Jane

Wishing you a lovely summer with some fab trips away. As mentioned in earlier posting…dont go away for too long as I find your advice on here brilliant!!!

Best wishes Judy x