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I miss my breast/CBT

14 REPLIES 14
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Re: I miss my breast/CBT

Ah brilliant Tracy! I know we can do this, It's going to be a much improved year, I just know it!
BC may have changed by body, but it won't take my spirit and soul!

HERE WE GO!! Xxx

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Re: I miss my breast/CBT

Yes you can do it Naz !!. Tell us your progress and we will support you all the way. I am going to try and lose at least a stone in weight this year so I too am determined to change. For too long now I have blamed the Tamoxifen but I need to take control now and not eat too many crisps and chocolate. I always used to cook from scratch but got a bit lazy after the BC so it is fresh veg, fruit and salads for the New Year. I have had to have the next size uniform at work so I am desperate to get back down to a size 12 , as all my clothes feel tight and uncomfortable. I will not let the BC change me this much. I want to be my old self and weight again !!

So a New year and a fresh start. I will let you know Naz how things progress. Love Tracy  xxxx

 

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Re: I miss my breast/CBT

Ah thanks Tracy, you have inspired me to make those all important steps!

Time to rebuild life after being shipwrecked !

xxx

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Re: I miss my breast/CBT

Yes it makes perfect sense Naz and I am sending you lots of love and healing thoughts to help you move on. I am confident that you will have the strength to cope this year. You will do all that you want to and much more because deep down you know you can do it !!! Go for it girl 2014 is the year of change xxx Love and light Tracy xxx
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Re: I miss my breast/CBT

Thanks again everyone for your helpful replies.

 

Poems, i get what you are saying. I have considered requesting a de construction of the reconstruction and having the healthy one removed. Made this suggestion to OH and he nearly fell of his chair in shock! So, the recon stays and the healthy one also gets to stay. Which leaves me getting used to a numb and scarred chest - tough that is..

 

I think CBT might be a good thing for me to try at least.. I need to get head/brain in tune with moving forward and dumping the negative thoughts .

 

So, where am i now? (Just thinking out aloud at the moment) Tired, the 4 year nightmare has come to and end, tired of my job (need a new challenge but clueles what to do) kind of feel shipwrecked on an island, needing to find myself again - does anyone connect with that feeling (it could just be me!).

Have done grieving, sad and anger, now just feel plain tired from it all. Tired from ops, thinking, putting negligence cases together, from missing my breast and from being happy and cheerful for others - does that make sense anyone??

 

It is now time to shift forwards and reintegrate with the rest of society and life . not sure where to start, but here goes..

 

Happy New Year all.

Naz xxxx

 

 

 

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Re: I miss my breast/CBT

Evening Naz.

 

Just to add another possible option for accessing CBT.  Changes within the NHS in recent years, GP's becoming financially independent etc... has meant that CBT is often available in Primary Care with a referral from GP.  There are a number of online CBT courses and books that often have a successful outcome but as with anything it will take a lot of work from yourself. MIND can also offer Counselling / Group CBT / CBT but again what is available varies from area to area but is usually well presented / helpful.

 

I was / am looking to access Mindfulness to help me move forward but.......... It is not available in my area in Primary Care..........MIND in my area covers three logistical towns (one of which i live in) but i have a Manchester post code so can't get funding and paying them is not an option they offer.  It is available in Secondary Care Mental Health Services but i don't meet the criteria for referral (thank goodness.)  So am currently trying to practice independently.... On a good day i can laugh at the the above process but i suspect i will end up paying to access privately......

 

Hope you manage to access CBT Naz and find it helpful. Take Care Gilly x

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Re: I miss my breast/CBT

Dear Naz,

 

I am so sorry that your Body issues are still troubling you. I do think professional counselling will help and the first thing tomorrow I would visit your GP for a referral as there will be a waiting list. You need to chat it through with an expert because they can help you grieve for the breast you have lost .

In the meantime remember to practice the art of Mindfulness and have techniques in place to avert any negative thoughts into your job, your children and family and friends. 

Please let us know how things progress as we are willing you to get better, but our minds are very very powerful which is why we sometimes need the help from a professional counsellor. Get the help you need and deserve Naz. The approaching New Year is your time to help yourself and get well again.

Sending you lots of love and healing thoughts. Tracy  xxx

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Re: I miss my breast/CBT

Hello Naz,

I havnt tried CBT so cant speak from experience, but it seems to have a good track record in managing your feelings and is used by the NHS. Its not about hours of therapy going into your feelings.

You've as good a chance of getting a good therapist via the NHS as privately, I hope you can get a referral.

NHS Mood Juice self help website has some good stuff http://www.moodjuice.scot.nhs.uk/

 

I'm waiting for double mx, and dont know how I'm going to cope. I really liked mine (until the left one was numbed by WLE and rads), agonising over recon or not - is it better to have none or two with no feeling?

I know I could not be bothered with prosthesis, and I know if it had been one not both, I would not have accepted being 'unbalanced'.

The best thing for my mental health in general is getting out walking/cycling/whatever, and a good yoga class. 

 

 

 

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Re: I miss my breast/CBT

NAZ, if I was a selfish person I wouldn't hesitate. But I'm a married lady with a loving, caring husband who looks after me and takes me into consideration when making decisions. I think it only fair that I do the same and he would rather I kept the one boob unless it becomes necessary to have it removed. I know I had a good moan about it, but all things considered it is a small price to pay for marital harmony. Good luck and wishing you the best for 2014.

 

poemsgalore xx

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Re: I miss my breast/CBT

Thanks everyone for your helpful replies.
I will definitely investigate what is available to me in the New Year. I did not want to use any more time and energy on body issues in 2014, I wanted to be able to accept and ' move on', but these negative thoughts are in the way at the moment, even after all this time. I just seem to find it SO hard to accept this is my new body now, so need to address, before I do anything else!

Poems, is having your remaining breast removed, an option for you ? I get your dilemma and probable frustrations. It seems this disease affects us all in different ways when comes to our bodies.

Naz xxx

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Re: I miss my breast/CBT

Hi Naz
Along with the support you have here our helpline re-opens tomorrow 9-5 if you feel it would help to talk things over, our team are on 0808 800 6000
Take care
Lucy BCC

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Re: I miss my breast/CBT

Hi Naz

 

I am so sorry you are feeling like this.

 

I just wanted to say that I had cbt a few years back for something completely different and found it to be a very effective technique and so I would say it is definitely worth a try. As for finding someone, perhaps your GP could refer you?

 

Take care.

 

Mary

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Re: I miss my breast/CBT

I do so feel for you NAZ, I can't begin to imagine what it must be like for you, so I do hope you manage to arrange CBT sessions to help you with it. I have the opposite problem. I also had MX but rather than missing the lost breast, I wish I could get rid of the remaining one. I too have negative thoughts about it and as I don't wear a bra (can't stand my prosthesis either) it dangles there like a huge ganglion on my chest. It spoils the way my clothes look and I can't help imagining myself with no boobs at all. I've only been like this for one year, so dread to think how I will feel after 4!!

 

poemsgalore xx

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Re: I miss my breast/CBT

Hope you find something soon. I have accessed help through the Hospital not CBT but mindfulness and just talking. Speak to your Breast care nurse or Gp they will know what's available in your locality. I am thinking of you and hoping you get some help big hug sent your way()
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I miss my breast/CBT

As the title says, I miss my breast, I really do.
I haven't had a left breast for 4 years, I have had nothing, reconstruction, nothing and reconstruction again.
I miss having feeling on one side, and I detest the ugly scars.
I have been grieving intensely for a year now and I am tired. I want to do some CBT to help me take control of my negative thoughts and anger better. Has anyone had CBT or even doing it now? Does it help? How do you find a good CBT therapist?

Thanks
NAZ xx