Ignored at work

[Steph J]

Hi Rebecca 

Well theres your answer your colleagues didnt know ... so thats why they didnt ask you and even if it had leaked through the grapevine they would still be cautious ..your work have just been professional . Your sickness is confidential . I understand you want your normality back and you want to be busy again .. Im sure you will be soon . I guess at the end of the day your job is important and needed to be continued in your absence . Hope you feeling better .x

My colleagues have been fab ..it was just in the begining a lot of them just didnt know what to say or how to approach me . And once I understood what was going on I started to take the lead and made it easier for them . At the end of the day as I said I wasnt close to everyone in the beginning so to start talking about a intimate subject isnt something that comes naturally . I understand the scenario its prob similar to when a member of my family is ill I cant deal with them with the same eyes as I can when I have a patient in front of me . Its odd isnt it ..human behaviour ! But I am glad to say Iv come across incredible kindness through my journey . I havent reached the time to return to work  but I have no concerns that I will be supported fully . 

It sounds as though things are picking up for you. Good luck and take care xxxx

[Rj7777]

Hi Steph. My experience was similar but to my colleagues credit they didn't tell many people why I was off I thought it would get out on the office grapevine anyway but it doesn't seem to have done. I would of thought nursing colleagues would be a bit more sympathetic. Things have been a bit better but there still isn't a lot for me to do as there is a thrid person who isn't needed and i hate not being busy. X

[Steph J]

Hi Rebecca 

Just read your post and wanted to say how sorry I am . I hope things have improved for you . I havent returned to work yet but I must admit when I was first diagnosed I was quite shocked at some peoples reactions . The main one being it was not mentioned . I found it odd because I am a nurse hence all my colleagues are too . 

The male ones where the worst and initially I was upset because I would have deemed some of the males to be my besties ... I have since discovered it was because they did not know how to approach me or what to say , and this was similar to some of the females . And the reality of the situation was that I did not share my private business with them all prior so I guess for them to start asking me about something so personal would have been quite uncomfortable . I changed the way I was thinking once I realised it was not a intended personal insult to me . Though Id share my experience with you Steph xxx

[Jill1998]

Going back to work is hard ,things change so quickly and after the experience of cancer you do feel more vulnerable and "different ",it takes time to feel anywhere near normal again.I didn't go back to work in between surgery and rads as my head was just not in the right place and I couldn't have concentrated .

[Rj7777]

Hi everybody

I have just returned to work after diagnosis and WLE. Have been fortunate clear margins and no lymph node involvement so just RT in new year.

I have gone back until the RT program starts but I wish I hadn't bothered no one seems to have missed me (although I haven't missed them I hate my job!) very few have asked how I am and there is someone on secondment covering for me and due to hr burocracy her secondment contract is for3 months until end jan and cannot go back before.

I feel like a spare part the person who is covering for me is the favourite anyway (she used to do my job before then left and came back to another job - long story) so if I got up and went home now no one would even notice I feel like saying i didn't choose to get breast cancer in fact I did everything to prevent it! Yet I am the one that is losing out. Just need to get this off my chest has anyone had similar experience? Rebecca x