These feelings are completely normal, so please don't feel ashamed about crying.
Do give the Helpline a call if you feel it will help to talk, they're on 0808 800 6000 and are open until 5pm today and 9-2 tomorrow.
Hope your all ok, its rather cold at the moment.
Seems its one of those weeks, I can't stop crying, got my appointment on Tuesday 14th with Oncologist, its making me feel really anxious I am so scared of all this. Everyone on here seems so brave I feel ashamed of myself, I should be like everyone else and just getting on with it but I am finding it really difficult.
Hope you all have a great weekend.
Hugs Deb xxx
Well the results were good my tumour was large 77mm x 25mm but only the one lump,grade 2, margins clear.I had 10 lymph nodes removed and cancer cells in only 1.
Isaw the oncologist and start 6 sessions of fec starting 5-6 weeks after my mx so in 3-4 weeks.I already knew that i had to have chemo so it wasn't a shock , but still not looking forward to it.
Peanutt1955 we will have to start a chemo in march thread won't we.
I spoke to the oncologist about the cold cap and they are arranging this for me.Apparently it adds 2 hours to the chemo but am willing to try.
After chemo comes rads not sure when or how much but that will be next.
I have to go and have an ECG as i have high blood pressure(can't think why) and yet more blood taken.
I had my seroma drained again yesterday by the consultant, he laughed saying i would't need reconstruction as it looked as if i had grown a new boob it was that big.Hope that is the last time but i doubt it.
It is my grandsons 1sr birthday today so going out to lunch with my daughter and grandson really looking forward to it.
Hope everyone is as well as they can be hugs debbie x
Well got my results today good and not so good news! Margins are clear so no need for further surgery thank goodness, however 14 nodes removed of which 3 have cancer cells in so despite the fact tumour in breast was relatively small, 23 mms - Grade 2 - I will need chemo so will now have to wait for that appt, BCN says could be about 3/4 weeks so could be March start then radiotherapy to follow. The only thing is I choose to go out of my area for surgery to a hospital which has a good reputation for Breast Care but now they are telling me I will have to stay local for chemo, something I would prefer not to do!! At first I refused but have now agreed to meet with the local onconologist for a chat and to look at the unit, if I am still not happy the original hospital will take me back, to do with funding!! What about patient choice! I think we deserve the best!
Di nice to hear you back at work, I go back next week, was going to go this week but have had horrid cold.
Alanaa, I think we nearly all get the same treatment but the process is carried out differently in each area.
good luck to everyone starting treatments or waiting for results.
Thinking of you all
Mary P xxx
Well, I intended to only go to work today for a couple of hours but ended up staying all afternoon! Doing salary claims, and teachers are hopeless with Excel spreadsheets, despite the times I’ve showed them how to do it!!! It felt good though – it was if I’d never been away. One of the visiting psychs came in though that has shingles so I kept well away! Can’t afford to get any infections because I want this chemo over and done with. Only thing about going to work today was I missed Home under the Hammer – I’m with you there Lydia and Carolyn!
Cancer unit rang with what I thought would be my first date (now there’s a blast from the past – first date!) but it was the nurse in charge of the Denosumab trial I’ve signed up to. Got to have a CT scan next Tuesday. No date yet for chemo, she said it’s usually 8 weeks from surgery so I may be joining a March Chemo thread!
Welcome to the new ladies on this thread, sorry that you’ve had to join but you get some good support and some laughs, I hope!
Lelly: I do feel for you, what a dreadful time, but look after Dennis, he won’t be with you long hopefully.
Hi Fran: It’s the pits when your employer is pants – you need some good advice, I think I’d posted before of the DirectGov website re statutory sick pay. Also the BCC have a good booklet on what employers have to do. They can’t discriminate against us.
By the way, I hope you’ve all applied for your prescription exception certificate.
I also thought that the rogue cancer cells were racing around my body like a steam train, but the surgeon said that they don’t and the chemo will eradicate any trace of them.
As others have said, there are rather a lot of us to mention by name now, but hey(!) to those who have got good results and to those with results you didn’t wish for.
Hugs and xxxx (and meows to Fat Cat from my cats, Scamp and Meggy)
Sorry to jump in on your thread but I am trying to get a message to poppyD - I did try to send a private message but I don't know whether it actually went as I can't see anything in my sent box. If you have got it you don't have to respond to it but if you didn't receive it please let me know and I will try and send another one. Take care everyone. Love xxx
Good evening to you all
I am wondering why some of us see their Onco after their first biopsy (I am one of them) and others not until or after their surgery. Again wonder if that is a regional variety or if I am just selective stupid this evening.
Mollie hope you got good news today. Have been thinking of you and all the other ones who are awaiting results/surgery/treatment.
Rather foogy here this evening so glad I am home and tucked up on the sofa with my feline companion.
Feeling a bit down tonight as my son has got a horrid, horrid cold so won't be coming home for the weekend as planned.
Back to Hospital on Monday for check up and on Tuesday for a LGFB pampering session.
Hugs to all of you from
Alanaa and Coco xx
what a busy day so much going on> been lotta crying ive been crying with you as i am awaiting oncology appt ? plan prob chemo. its a terrible time to be waiting with uncertainties hopefully we will be like all the brave people before us who are undergoing surgery chemo radsetc and as Gloria gaynor says i will survive
lets share the journey
best wishes and hugs to all of you who are feeling low
lots of love poppy x
Good afternoon to you all
I feel like a prized idiot - put my name on the woman behind the cancer site and hey presto instead of my face I posted a photo of my littel white cat who sadly passed away last year. Just clicked on the wrong slide - what a numpty.
Have been a bit under the weather over the last couple of days. Looks like my wound will take quite some time to heal so in for the long haul. Going to get cosy on the sofa with Fat Cat and shut out the world for a day or two.
Hugs to all of you from
Alanaa and Cat xx
Got my date for my first rads session (22 Feb)which I assume will be the orienteering thing - where they map you out and tattoo you. Its in a different clinic - one that is only 55 minutes away rather than 1 hour 45.
Got another appt with surgeon on the 20th where i will get results from bone scan and lung X ray and hopefully she will tell me that my incisions have healed so I can start the rads.
So I shall be 'appearing 'on the Feb Rads thread as well as the November diagnosis thread ...
Keeping my fingers crossed for you Lydia that you will NOT need chemo.
Hugs to everyone
Hey good to know your name Lydia and that youre more upbeat today.
Fran I'm talking from a veteran coldsore martyr here but the bloody things will go after a few days. I usually plaster lips with Carmex or the doctor can prescribe some magic cream that my sister in law swears by it's called Fenistil. I always know when things are getting to me because I break out I. The wretched things!
I'm being a bid sad here today sitting watching my phone I rand BC nurse yesterday to get her to chase oncology and waiting for reply. I just want a date to get to and to know if I have to gave chemotherapy as consultant thinks I will because of size at 2.9cm, my age' grade 2 but borderline 3.
In my control freak mind I'd mapped out my weeks without considering chemotherapy. I was going to have my radio for 6 weeks at the end of the month then second op to balance up my lopsidedness then back to my lovely teaching job at the beginning of May, All without any waiting of course:)
Have a good day ladies look forward to more chats later xxxx
i get sore all the time best thing i put on mine is aftershave ive tried all coresold creams and they feed it it very sore and make you feel horrible im trying to stay positive i just need to know my treatment plan its all the waiting week today i should know
lots of love tracy xx
Oh Fran, you sound really low at the minute. I know chemo is terrifying and will be horrible, but it will kill all of those nasty cancer cells, it will have a positive outcome. I'm the last one to preach as I spend most my of my days blubbering, but now is the time to get your armour on, this b*****d will not beat you. I know how hard it is to be positive for your children, it's nigh on impossible, if you're managing to do that you're doing better than me. In respect of your money, aren't you entitled to any benefits? Is it worth contacting Macmillan (not sure if it's them but I know some charities do this) to see if they can look at your entitlements?
Love Lydia x
how are you all doing.
I would do personals but there are so many of us I dont think I'll remember.
I went for my pre chemo assessment yesterday and was told about the dos and donts and when I asked why do i need to keep checking my temp whats the significance of it and she told me well i burst into tears. I had actually realised why i needed to do it. I think I had buried my head in the sand and thats why i havent looked into it.ANyway i know now..
Just a mention, to chascat I had 4 nodes removed and only 1 infected but then becuase of this they did an ANC and removed a further 14 and none of those infected but I still have to have chemo because tumour was grade 3. Also because i'm 39 and they want to through everything at it so it doesnt come back. I'm petrified and keep crying, Even had my hair cut short in inticipation of bald head but also I'm staying positive for the children. Its a scary time I've also got the added problem of lack of money cos my work of crap with sick pay even though i've been there 9 years.
SOrry that was a bit of a rant.
Also yesterday woken up with a huge coldsore and I've never had one before so thats nice, not. I've bought some cream but it looks awful so hope it goes before next week. Only 5 more sleeps.
Love to everyone.
Mary, hope you're resting up today, sounds like yesterday was quite an ordeal.
Poppy, were all of your lymph nodes removed or was this just from the sentinal node biopsy? I know someone who had a few rogue cells in one node at the biopsy and they didn't remove the remaining cells, just treated the area with radiotherapy, but my surgeon told me it was standard procedure to take them all out, even if only 1 tiny spec was found, it's just so confusing.
Teabelly, bless you, that was me yesterday, nobody can understand what it's like unless you've been there, keep your chin up my friend.
Twinky, hope you're feeling a bit better.
Sassy, thinking of you
Everyone else i've missed, hoping you're all having a good day.
Positive thoughts and hugs to all x
im having a bad day today dont know why i just feel like crying well its only 9am and already burst into tears 5 times
poppy hope your ok after your results
Mary m sorry you had a bad day hope your feeling better today its sounded horrible all them test hope your radio isnt delayed
sassy hope your op gone well
mollie hope you get good news today good luck
twinky hope your feeling better think ive got a cold coming feel really cold and keep blowing my nose
Mary p good luck with your resuls x
good luck to everyone else getting results or starting treatment
lots of love
I hope you are ok
I got similar result last night micro cell in node. Bit confused really
being referred to onco and prob chemo then rads, surgeon said we need to discuss benefits of further surgery at some point but as he pointed out its all about probabilitie. I guess all you can do is take advice and make decision. I know it is hard as when micro cells we are encouraged tobe part of the decision and this can be quite difficult
when is your next appt for plan
thinking of you xxxx poppy
just caught up on the threads and can see that you haver calmed down a little during the course of the day! Breathe deeply.
Had a horrid day - felt like i was on a conveyor belt...liver scan is clear but have to wait for results of lung x ray and bone scan. No idea when i'll get them as waiting for my next appt.Ended up with a splitting headache which i am assuming is from dehydration- once you have the radioactive injection they give you an enormous bottle of mineral water and tell you to drink it all.
Fine now I'm home!
Still leaking lymph so i'm guessing radiotherapy will be delayed whilst i heal completely...
Hope everyone is OK, warm, dry and not too anxious.
love to you all especially all waiting for results/having new treatments tomorrow.
Thank you everyone for your words of wisdom.
Alanaa and cat, my surgeon said he'd removed 4 nodes and 1 showed only 1 tiny cell, however, he said he didn't know which node it was in which confused me a bit, I assumed it would be the one closest to the tumour. I know 1 tiny cell is very favourable in the grand scheme of things but i'm worrying that it wasn't in the node closest to the cancer but in the one furthest away and therefore could have spread to the others 😞
Mollie, fingers crossed for tomorrow, it's just so unbearable waiting and wondering isn't it.
Twinky, sorry you're feeling pants, bed is the best place for you.
Carolyn, just going to do a bit of housework then settling down for Bargain Hunt!
Teabelly, hope you enjoy your drive, can't beat a bit of independence.
Love and hugs to all xxx
When I had my mx they removed a few nodes and found a few rogue cells in just one of them. My Prof said it was a good sign that it was only in the first one as the other nodes are doing their job in blocking unwanted cells from spreading. Hope this will help to ease your mind a bit.
Hug from Alanaa and Cat xx
Chascat i am feeling the same as you today, results tomorrow, i know that i have to have chemo and rads but don't know about my nodes they have all been taken out so wil find out for sue tomorrow.
Twinky hope you feel better soon i have a cough but no teperature just this blasted seroma, feels like a football under my arm.
Carolyn just going to make some tea and watch homes under the hammer with you both.
vitual hugs to everyone debbie xx
sorry your feeling ill hope you feel better soon i had a cough for nearly 2 weeks before my op
Chascat that's what we are all here for those meltdown moments. Everyone tries to be supportive but it's us who are going through it who know how you feel. I'm sure all of us have good days and sometimes that big grey cloud appears,
All things crossed for you Tracy for results, remember we are all here.
Oh dear Twinky you'll have to blitz out that cold in readiness for treatment.
Sending love to all xxx
Now Chascat we have an appointment to watch Homes under the Hammer:)
Oh heavens Chascat....have a big hug. The treatment will sort out any issues of the cancer trying to spread. It's all a very scary time. I have chemo on the cards although my nodes were clear and it's a big relief to know the chemo will kill any rogue cells loose in my body! I'm a bit worried though as I haven't started yet & am in bed with a temp & bad cough. Hope it doesn't delay the start of my chemo but I do feel pretty ill. Got another 11 days to get over it!
Try not to scare yourself. Your Oncologist will look after you & make sure you have the best outcome. Please do call the helpline. Just talking to someone can make you feel loads better!
hope all feeling ok im going to try and drive today feel excited about being free and go and pop and see people
Sassy Good luck today hope all goes well be thinking about you x
Chascat Hope you feel a bit better soon Im worried sick about my results next thu and cant get it off my mind Its not boring or irrational least you can tell us how you feel and we are all here for you big hugs xx
lots of love tracy x x
Apologies in advance, but i'm having a bit of a meltdown. Am utterly convinced that the 1 tiny spec that was found on one of my 4 lymph nodes means the cancer has spread, i'm beside myself with fear. I know i'm probably being irrational (boring too!) but I can't help it, it's all snowballed and i'm a bit of an emotional wreck at the minute. I know there's probably nothing any of you can do to help me at the minute and i'm sorry for being a nuisance x
Good luck Sassy with your further operation and Mollie with your results. BC really is the pits and is certainly the best diet i have ever had xxx
Just checking in before my op tomorrow for full node clearance and a bit more of boob taken!
Hopefully will do as well as you all have been and look forward to catching up on how your all doing in a couple of days!
Love and hugs Sassy xx
Good luck to all getting results this week. As others have said, getting difficult to mention everyone but this is an invaluable source of comfort for us all
dont know what is happening i keep posting it hasnt appeared im not good with computers
care n glad you got some good newsand your back at work
good luck poppy hope all goes well with your results tomorrrow sorry you have all that with your son aswell
debbie good luck with your results on thur hope you get good news
hi carolyn 1709 i found my lump in october to i have had lumpectomy on jan 18 still waiting for my results on feb 16th i might have to have chemo and radio its all the waiting that makes you worry will keep in touch
hope everyone is gettin on well good luck to all getting there results
lots of love tracyxx
Thanks care and chascat
I still remember how awful it was getting sons results, I thought i was going to pass out or run out screaming. Its such a rollercoast for us all but having support is great. Think I should take one of your Diazepams
Hi all am new to this sight and have been reading all posts regarding breast cancer,
It was confirmed on 2nd of this month that i have breast cancer,test from the lymph node confirmed cancer cells,but fortunately breast only showed a grade1 invasive ductal carcinoma so am more fortunate than some of you .
I go for my pre-op this friday and having a mastectomy and axillary node clearance on 22nd this month.
Thank You for reading
Thanks Chascat and Poppy, good luck for tomorrow, I'll have everything crossed for you. So sorry you're going through this and your son being ill too, that's really hard.
I can recommend going back to work - I won't be there for long as I do have to have chemo, and don't think I'll be able to work then, but it's so good to have something else to think about!
Care N, so pleased for you, the relief must have been enormous.
Poppy, I had my results on Monday, and have to be honest, did pop a Diazepam before I went, don't think my legs would have carried me in there otherwise, keeping everything crossed for you.
Hugs to all x
Have been reading this thread and would love to join you if that's OK. I was initially diagnosed in November - told small lump (16mm) and would need WLE and SNB followed by rads and tamoxifen. And then it all went pear-shaped. No clear margin and 2 nodes affected. So more surgery, cavity excision and axillary clearance. Must say I found the second surgery much harder. Then had a seroma which was drained twice. Looking good - then developed cellulitis in the breast and landed up in hospital on IV antibiotics for a week. The infection spread to the seroma under my arm and the wound re-opened, followed shortly by the wound in my breast. So, more than two months later and still not ready for the rest of the treatment.
Hi everyone, I returned to work yesterday after lumpectomy and node clearance on 11th. It was great to be back, but my arm was aching at the end of the day, and I was really worried as under my arm was swollen so phoned BCN this morning. Thank goodness I did - she made time to see me today and doesn't think its lymphodema, but while I was there she chased up my Onc appointment (they hadn't received the referral so she faxed through another copy), and also gave me results of the CT scan (which I had to have as 12 nodes infected) and the CT scan was clear!! What a relief - yes, I cried.
Good luck to you all waiting for test results.
Love and hugs
cor blimey lelly you've had a c**p time. As Mollie says too many to mention individually but hang on in there all of you. You are all inspirational and glad to have you for company
I will find out tomorrow eve what happens next I hope it will be radiotherapy with Mary however it will depend on margins node results etc I am calm at mo but terrified. Tomorrow gonna be a long day. My son is waiting for his 3rd neuro surgery and they can wait for me to finish radiotherapy before his op so i can go and stay with him> Dont know what will happen if I get different news so will be gutted. His last op was 12 hours and very risky so have to be there to help him even though he is an adult/
Thinking of you all hugs to you all thanks for sharing the journey good luck love poppy x
Hello ladies great to hear from you all. I definitely know what you mean about control freak maybe that's why the waiting is mind blowing.
Good luck all for biopsy results.
I'll compare soon when the dreaded appointment comes through.
Well another trip to have my seroma drained yesterday another 400mls and it is just as big agaain today, getting really fed up with it.
Mbcn nurse said to speak to the surgeon when i get my results on thursday and see what he says.Only two days now to wait getting scared.
Mary m what good news you must be pleased no chemo hurragh
welcome to our clan carolyn 1709
good luck mary p for thursday we will be able to compare notes
hello to all the other ladies on this topic getting to many to mention everyone
I was diagnosed on the 13th January and had the lump removed plus sentinal node biopsy on the 24th January. Just had my results from the op and unfortunately a micro spec of cancer was found in one of the 4 nodes removed which means further surgery for me with a full Axillary Node Clearance this Saturday. My lump was 19mm and is grade 2, Oestrogen positive so I will need tamoxifen, my margins are clear so they've got all of it out of the breast. I don't know if I'll need or if not will even elect to have chemo, I suppose it will depend on the result of my lymph node clearance. I haven't had an oncologist appointment yet either, that will scare me witless! I work from home so although am officially off sick, have dipped in and done a little bit each day, it's helped to keep my mind busy - obviously once I've watched Homes under the hammer and Bargain Hunt! xxx
Welcome Carolyn, I know exactly what you mean as I like to know exactly whats going to happen next, I am a bit of a control freak!I hate this waiting game but not a lot can be done about that. I am going back to work next week until I start chemo.
Mary M - Great news that you dont need chemo.
Lelly - What a traumatic time you had, I did what Alanaa suggests and slept with 3 pillows, 2 side by side and one across the top so you can snuggle in and feel supported.
Welcome to Hollygypsy and Care N.
Got a call from the BCN this morning to say my results are definitely back after last weeks debacle so will know results when I go thurs.
Hugs to everyone
Mary P xxxxxx
There must be someone here at the same stage...i'm waiting for rads others i think are waiting for chemo....
waiting waiting we all hate it.
Welcome to January Buddies
Best of luck
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Hello to all
New to this so here's a brief recap. Initially found lump in October last year and was seen by hospital the following week. There was then a change of consultant to this put things back a bit. Had mammogram then 2 weeks later biopsy and another 2 week wait for diagnosis. Like everyone that sentence that says yes I am afraid you have cancer still seems like it's happening to someone else. Follow on visit to consultant a week later ( by this time it's the end of November). Consultant then decides she wants an MRI which shows two further lumps one in each breast. Followed by CT scan which thankfully shows they are clear. Operation finally booked for 16th January and so far so good. Had a lumpectomy and at the same time a lift, which now means I'm in the lop sided boob club! The end of the line to have second breast reduced seems a life time away. All healing really well and now waiting for oncology appointment. At the moment its edging towards needing chemotherapy as lump was 2.9 cm. Don't know if others are like me but I hate waiting around and watching post daily to see if the appointment as finally been given I'm the kind of person who needs to know what's happening next. Strangest thing is at the mome t feel fi e and being off work is killing me, there's only so much daytime tv one person can watch. Be greatvto hear from anyone else in the same boat for advice xxx
Oh poor Lelly (my sister is a Lelly)
You have been through the mill....thinking of you...and a gentle hug ...a big one might be uncomfortable.
Good morning Lelly
glad you are back home now and feeling a bit better. I had the same problem re sleeping so popped 3 pillows behind me and slept half sitting up. Found that eased the problem with the fluid wobbling about and getting pressure from lying down.
Hope all of you are doing fine today
Hugs from Alanaa and Cat xx