I was diagnosed September 2009, had surgery and chemo.
I also had recon, but it has not worked, so i am going to have either ld flap or tram sometime this year.
Before diagnosis, i was job hunting, after being at home with my children, who are 3 and 6.
I am finding it hard to apply for jobs which interest me, let alone get an interview at the moment. But on my CV and application forms, i always state the gap in my employment history relates to raising children However, about a year of that time, has been taken with surgery and treatment and recovery etc, but potential employers won’t see that, just that i have been out of the workplace for best part of 4 yrs.
Anyway,do you think i should put job hunting on the back burner , until i complete all the recon? I am currently training to be a CAB assessor, to improve my cv and make it more current.
The other thing,is that i am not sleeping well at the mo, mainly due to the fact that i am having to have more surgery, which i was not expecting (another story!), and do wonder how i would cope with a job at the moment anyway, as for me, this year was meant to be closure on the whole trauma of the previous year. Now instead of closure, i have to face more surgery, recovery etc.
Have you thought of doing a bit of voluntary work? It is something to put on your CV and also you could try different areas and get a better idea of what you may want to do when you are able to look for a paid job? And it shouldn’t be a problem when you are off for appts/surgery etc.
Focus on u and your next op. 4 years away from paid employment is nothing when caring for small people and the fact that you have been unwell too, you don’t have to say anything about it unless you need/want to. If you are not sure what you would like to do voluntary work is ideal. I did lots of different unpaid work when bringing up my boys and eventually trained as a teacher, the latter I no longer do, semi-ritired, well artist… So focus on you, what you want neen, your family, work experience, maybe pt edu if appropriate. Do not overload yourself, don’t worry about others expectations, the rat race is there if you really want to step back on later… TAKE CARE AND ALL THE BEST Alicexx
I have really been feeling quite stressed with it all to be honest.
I guess, because most of the other mums at school are all working and seem to be able to juggle a million and one things…but not sure how many have a big op on the horizon though!
I will keep at my CAB work because that will improve the look of my CV, and then see what happens.
Bye the way, i am nearly 40, do you think that is too old to be starting afresh with jobs? I used to be a secondary school teacher, but decided that i don’t want to do that any longer.
Nearly 40, you are a baby Naze, hehe.
I was a CAB adviser before teaching in sec ed. yes good for cv and keeps you thinking/mind active, NO NOT TOO LATE TO CHANGE PROFESSIONS, my mum stated teaching in late 60s til her death and I never to teach again having taken early retirment on ill health grounds. As for what other parents do work or not is not you, you/ we are all different. NO GUILT you and children top of you list of concerns. Pace self, be kind to self, baby steps xx
I would just carry on with what you are doing and when and if the time is right for you to get paid job do it then. As for your age yes a baby still!!! I was made redundant at 45 and paniced I would not get another job but applied for 2 and got both of them so age is NOT a problem for you.
Be kind to yourself looking after 2 young ones is a full time job in itself without all your treatment on top!
No Naz, they cannot. You are protected by the DDA/Equality Act.
Also, when I interview for staff, I can no longer ask about their sickness record at interview. BUT if I offer them a job, then if their current state of health means that they are totally unsuitable for the post, then that’s a different matter. But past illness that has been recovered from does not count. If you are asked about it at interview, they are breaking the law.
Pay depends on your sickness policy. You may not get any sick pay.
In theory, if you are not at work then you are in breach of contract and after a reasonable period in which you are invited to ‘improve your attendance’, you could be sacked, BUT in your favour, cancer means that you are covered life-long by DDA/EA. This includes time off for reconstruction.
That is my understanding of this situation.
Please seek out the correct professional advice from a union / solicitor experienced in employment law / BCC employment helpline for confirmation.
Naz there is really no job more worth doing and doing well than raising children. Unless you are desparate for the money, then give yourself permission to be there for them… if the worst happened and you had a relapse/recurrence in ten years time, you will not regret having laid a great foundation for them now and spent that time when you were well. A generation ago most mums would not dream of working while their children were at primary school, never mind playgroup. All this equality is fine but do we see dads struggling like this, not many in my experience.
Why oh why do we women beat ourselves up so much? Superman even gets his underpants and trousers on wrong without us, and he doesn’t even have cancer OR kids.
Of course it depends what you want from work - cash of your own, adult company, a role, pension rights, keeping your CV looking good… Are you making the present intolerable just for the sake of a future you may never reach? Hate to be blunt, but someone showed me I was so worried about making up my years for full pension when actually for less than five years it was much better to try and quit early, stay healthy and enjoy the now. Before getting BC I had promised DD to help with the grandkids if and when, and I aim to be alive to keep that promise!
Would you consider something a bit off the main track, like childminding that would let you stay there for your own but also keep building the CV, remember there is some adult contact with the parents and you get on-going training from the council first-aid, child-protection etc as well as the (admittedly rather limited) financial incentives. Not all jobs need you to be totally rat-raced and chasing the 08:11 in high heels. Could you do saleable crafts from home, do out-of-school or adult tutoring work or translations? Have another look at your skills and talents and what you would actually like to be doing!
Wishing you luck, and keep an open mind about the possibilities.
Naz you do what you want to do for you and your family, and future career will happen when and how you want to mould it. Life is such a strange thing, guilt about what/where we should be is a waste of time. Hope that you have a wonderful day, time for you, for children and do finish CAB training if it suits you. Hugs Alice x
Showing my ignorance here, but what is CAB training?
I googled it but came up with black taxi cabs and fork lifts and I suspect that’s way off course.
The reason I looked at this thread is because I came from Sydney in Jan 2010 and my CV is going to show a wopping great gap in employment thanks to BC. Thinking of doing some voluntary work until I grow some hair.
I think voluntary work is a great way of filling any gaps on your cv, and learn some new skills, as long as you can afford to financially.
Still undecided here, but we will see what happens in the future. Really want this damm op out of way, but also realise that i have wasted enough time with BC already…grrrhhh
Thanks for all your replies, they have been really useful…
