Im sorry to say that my usual positive self seems to have got lost along the way.
I was diagnosed in Dec 14 with breast cancer and subsequently have had 3 operations, two on my breast and one to remove my ovaries and fallopian tubes (as I have now been diagnosed with the braca 2 gene).
I have been to work for onky 4 weeks since I was diagnosed and the rest of the time I have been recovering after all the operations and nestled in between some radiotherapy.
My confidence seemsvto have taken a battering, I feel “safe” at home but on the other hand im totally fed up with looking at my house everyday.
Anyway tomorrow I am starting back to work, eeeek im having a bad evening with a upset tummy due to my nerves.
Im anxious as everyone keeps telling me how well I look but inside I feel awful.
Has anyone else experienced similar?
Most days I just want to hide under my duvet, its horrible feeling so low.
Sorry if I have rambled, its just nice to sound it all out,
Hi Lynne , I understand what you mean by home feeling like a safe place , I could barely move from bed in the early days of my diagnosis ! You’ve been you an awful lot so it’s natural to feel anxious about getting back out in the real world again, I have to say I’ve found work a great distraction and although pre diagnosis I would dream of being able to give it up I now appreciate it and the support my colleagues have given me and the fact it gives me a routine again, you will soon feel like you’ve never been away, good luck xx
Dear Lynne, just came across your post, I’m not that far along the road as yourself but after diagnosis I continued to work right up till my op last Monday so I agree with Kim, work is a great distraction from all that you’ve been through.
I’m off for genetic test for brca2 tomorrow so reading all you’ve been through is a possibility for myself if I get a positive result. I wish you the very best of luck for your first day back and I’m sure your colleagues will welcome you with open arms but at the same time will be as nervous as you are.
Tomorrow evening treat yourself to something you fancy for getting through yetanother milestone, regards Suzie xx
I have also been struggling with a loss of confidence. I lost my job right before my first surgery was planned so things were delayed, then post-op I had to relocate due to no income and lost my support system. Once I was mostly healed physically, I still had trouble facing getting a job. I couldn’t even get through a practice interview without breaking down emotionally.
But here’s the good news… it does get better. I was encouraged to consider worker retraining and just finished my first week of school! My “school counselor” recommended a specific instructor for a business class who has really opened my eyes. It’s more like a life lessons class than a business class. It’s been a really good step for me to get back into the world and participate in life and people and has really helped with my confidence.
Can I also say thank you? While I hope and expect you’ll soon be back in the swing of your job with supportive co-workers, your post made me feel a little less alone in my own confidence challenges.