Thank you for your supportive words. Yes it is weird actully seeing it in black and white rather than it just being a spoken maybe. however it is a major relief finally making the decision. Having the money means that my husband - like Vals can consider early retirement and we can do things together while I am relatively fit.
It is great having time and energy to do things that bring me pleasure and spending time with people I care about.
Let's hope that we all confound our prognosis and have a long time being merry ladies who lunch.
The day I foud out my mets had spread was the last day I worked at all. My husband managed to get early retirement too because my prognosis was poor. 50% chance of surviving 2 years....My husband says he is going to complain as he thought he would have a much younger new wife bu now and not the old crock I have become! But both retiring early was the best thing we ever did. We both worked shifts back then and often did not see much of wach other and I used to have to phone him at work ( he was on nightshift as a charge nurse) to discuss anything regarding the kids and things that needed to be discussed and couldn't do in a note left on the table. It has allowed us to spend quality time together doing the things we thought we would probably do when we both retired in our 60s. I still enjoy life but it scares me a bit as time goes on and I worry that the options are running out. So really hoping that this new chemo will do its best for me. I had my first haircut (trim really) last night, the first in over a year. It looks spiky and I am just hoping that the chemo does not make it fall out all over again! I couldn't bare another bald Christmas...but if I have to...I have to... Hugs to all my pals. XX
As Liz has said, you have been talking about this for a while so I'm sure you've made the right decision for you and your family. It is very difficult though and don't be surprised if you feel a bit down after making it. I had to make a choice a few years back when a current job I had been doing finished. I started a new role very soon after but regretted it immediately so left (after 1 day!!! So unlike me). I really had to confront the whole secondary BC side of things then as the main thought was 'do I want to spend my days doing something I really didn't enjoy when time is so precious'. It really floored me having to face my immortality so to speak as, up to then, I hadn't had to make any decisions at all about work. After I got over this period, which did take a while, I stayed out of work, through choice, for about 18 months. Having started a new job a year ago I again had to give up due to the latest progression, so it's not easy!
Again, as Liz has said please get in touch if you want to meet up to chat or PM me before the Hants ladies Nov meet up.
Hi Jacqui, I am not on the site much but saw you post and just wanted to say that I am glad you put your worries down. I retired early, but years ago now. I know what you are feeling. I too feel as if things are galloping along too quickly for my liking. I have scull mets but am still able to drive but it did cross my mind that the day will come when I cannot. My Dad had to give up driving recently and it came as such a blow to him. That is when I started thinking about it. Are you on Facebook? A few people you know are there and you could join us if you are not there already. Let me know if you do and I will help. You will see me there with same photo as on here. I have mouth/lip/chip numbness that is due to being on Biphosphonates. Also a painful left arm that I had the doctor in Oncology look at but nothing is broken thank goodness. I started a new chemo on Friday so will be spending Xmas on chemo again 😞 This time it is Vinorelbine. Keep in touch. I will pop in here to see how you are. Hugs, Val
I have finally opted to stop working - my work as a podiatrist was just getting too physically and emotionally demanding for me (lung and bone mets). Today my GP signed a form to release a small private pension fund I have - this will ensre I have some finacial security. She had to state that I may die within a year (I suspect I will go on longer than that.) It is a huge relief to finally have this done with but also feels a bit weird and sad.
Just wanted to say this out loud to people who will understand.
Thanks for listening - Jacquix