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Miss you Mum. Love you Mum.

36 REPLIES 36
scottishlass
Member

Re: Miss you Mum. Love you Mum.

Thank you Revcat. I know you have had a busy time with work so know you cannot be everywhere all the timme>
I was clearing out my Mum's clothes on Friday and took them all to the local charity shop. This was not as harrowing as I thought it would be....until I came to the outfir she wore to my wedding in 1971....the fact that she had kept it all this time was very poignant. But Dad wanted me to move her clothes so it needed to be done. It is just over a month since Mum died yet I think of her everyday. I was licking the spoon after making a sponge and it took me back to my early years. I was later making lasagne and thought I woud take some to my Mum.....then I realised......I suppose this is just normal reaction. I am oky about Mum dying now, She was not the Mum that I remember as she was very confused and unhappy at her nursing home. Plus it has taken the strain off my Dad so that he can rest more although I do think that he is rather lonely now. Thanks for all you kind thoughts. Val

RevCat
Member

Re: Miss you Mum. Love you Mum.

Val I am so sorry I only just spotted this thread, so am posting very late on. I am sure a month on the grief is still raw and the ache of separation keen, but I also know that your Mum is now free from suffering and at rest.

Sending you a belated hug, and thinking of you and your family as you carry on living and loving as your Mum would wish you to. <<< HUG >>>
scottishlass
Member

Re: Miss you Mum. Love you Mum.

Thank you. Your words are very kind. VAL

Welsh_girl
Member

Re: Miss you Mum. Love you Mum.

We all want to offer our support because you are such a lovely person.
You give so much to others, so in turn it is good that we can support you too when it is needed.

Take good care. Being responsible for your parents is not an easy time.
I nursed my Mum with BC for five years and then my Dad for ten with dementia. I can understand your plight but not the fear that you may not outlive your Dad.
That must be very very hard to consider....

With tight hugs from Welsh girl xx

scottishlass
Member

Re: Miss you Mum. Love you Mum.

Now that I have time and the funeral is over and the paperwork done I woud just like to thank everyine for your messages to me. It is of comfort to me now that I can go back to these posts and actually take them in properly.
I think Mum had a good life but she had been in a nursing home for many years and she was unhappyy with her quality of life. She could no longer enjoy the things she loved to do. She could no longer read or follow a TV programme, not bake a cake or potter in the garden or spend time with her family. Dad has not been great since she died as every day he visited her at the Home unless she had other visitors to give him the afternoon off. He has great gaps in his day now that are not filled with visiting.
But we have completed al the paperwork we can now and there is not more to be done for the moment. His affairs have been dealt with and now his Solicitor is dealing with a few loose ends. But it has made Dad think too about puting his own affairs into order and allowing me to become a power of autorney should he be unable to cope with things in the future. It was difficut speaking to the solicitor because I had to point out that it was possibe that I could go before my dad without dad actually taking this in, perhaps the fact that he is partly deaf is a bonus here.
The letters of support and the kindness of you all has brought a tear or two but I just want to say just how much it means to me to know you all care. Thank you from the bottom of my heart, Val

scottishlass
Member

Re: Miss you Mum. Love you Mum.

Thank you all above for your kind thoughts. The funeral went well on Thursday and my dad is looking less stressed now.
I have my elder daughter home for a week from France which is the good part and I am sitting on the sofa with both daughters now. I think my fridge is being emptied as we speak but I do not mind as it is good to see them eating up all the extra food we have bought in....just like old times when they lived here at home. I am seeing my Consultant tomorrow and go to the ward for my usual treatment on Tuesday. Still have paperwork to complete and Mum's clothes to sort but that can be done in the weeks ahead when I am ready. i really appreciate your support. It helps. Love Val

hollymeg
Member

Re: Miss you Mum. Love you Mum.

sorry to hear this val, xxx

majelsty
Member

Re: Miss you Mum. Love you Mum.

Hi Val,
Thinking of you today.
Hugs
Maj xx

sarahlousie
Member

Re: Miss you Mum. Love you Mum.

Val so sorry to hear about your loss, and apologies for not realising sooner,
sending you lots of love and light at this difficult time.
sarahxxxx
dib
Member

Re: Miss you Mum. Love you Mum.

val,so sorry you have lost your mum,i lost my mum to this awful disease 22 yrs ago and still miss her,she was my best friend and she died at age 51,the same as i am now,but i often talk to her and feel she is still around.condolences to you and your dad,xx
thinking of you,Di

ragamuffin
Member

Re: Miss you Mum. Love you Mum.

Hi Val
Nothing like garden therapy is there?
Hope you are looking after yourself too- no matter at what age we lose our Mum it's always very sad.
Thinking of you lots.
Diana xx

scottishlass
Member

Re: Miss you Mum. Love you Mum.

Thanks Lucinda and Lesley. It is good of you both to post. I am doing okay but am not my usual self I know. Cannot do much now that the plans are in place for the funeral. Doing stuff to keep my mind busy so that thoughts do not keep creeping in. But I am not uspet. I thought I would be. I am sad. But she was so unhappy with life that I feel she is at peace now. I feel more concerned about my Dad right now. But he wants to be in his own house and has even done his usual Saturday shopping which was part of his routine. He is going into the garden to do some light weeding this afternoon which is the place he most likes to be. Life goes on. Love Val

lucinda
Member

Re: Miss you Mum. Love you Mum.

Dear Val
So sorry to hear your sad news.My thoughts are with you and all your family.

Lucinda xx

LesleyLP
Member

Re: Miss you Mum. Love you Mum.

So sorry to hear this Val. I am pleased your mum was peaceful at the end and that you and your dad were with her. Thinking of you and your family.
Lesley xx

scottishlass
Member

Re: Miss you Mum. Love you Mum.

How thoughtful everyone has been. Thank you all for all your kind words. It helps. Love Val

esbee
Member

Re: Miss you Mum. Love you Mum.

Dear Val,
So very sorry to hear of your loss.
Sending you love and strength.
Esbee x

alanaa
Member

Re: Miss you Mum. Love you Mum.

Val, so very sorry to hear about your mum. My sincere condolences to you and your family at this sad and difficult time. Will be thinking of you
Alanaa and Fat Cat xx

katytc
Member

Re: Miss you Mum. Love you Mum.

Val, so sorry to hear your news, thinking of you all at this sad time xx

Tolliebelle
Member

Re: Miss you Mum. Love you Mum.

Val
So sorry to hear about your mum sending deepest condolences to you and your family.
Jill x x x
catlovingwoman
Member

Re: Miss you Mum. Love you Mum.

Please accept my sincere condolances to you and your family at this sad time. I lost my mum 2years,ago and my brother last year. I am still grieving. I try to think of,them waiting just across a bridge in another dimension in time. God grant you courage and strength. Love, and kindest regards. Pauline. xxx

silverjill6666
Member

Re: Miss you Mum. Love you Mum.

So sorry to hear your sad news. Love silver x

scottishlass
Member

Re: Miss you Mum. Love you Mum.

So many lovely messages. Thank you all. I am feeling fine. All arrangements made. Now for a little time to myself. Love Val

NannieSpiky
Member

Re: Miss you Mum. Love you Mum.

Val
So sorry to read your sad news.
Condolences to you and your family and look after yourself Val.
Love Liz x

rachy7
Member

Re: Miss you Mum. Love you Mum.

So sorry to hear this, Val. My thoughts are with you and your family.

Love Rachy

Lizdeb
Member

Re: Miss you Mum. Love you Mum.

There is very little worse than this - so sorry for your loss Val.
Big hugs.
Best wishes
Liz x
ChoccieMuffin
Member

Re: Miss you Mum. Love you Mum.

Deep condolences, Val. However young or old, it's always really hard to lose your mum.

CM
x

Libralady
Member

Re: Miss you Mum. Love you Mum.

My condolances Val. glad to know she passed peacefully.

Bethy
Member

Re: Miss you Mum. Love you Mum.

Val ,so sorry to see your news...treasure the memories and good times...Bethy xx

izmark
Member

Re: Miss you Mum. Love you Mum.

Val,
So sorry to hear of your loss. My thoughts are with you and your family.
Isobel

truffle_shuff
Member

Re: Miss you Mum. Love you Mum.

So sorry for your loss, I was 16 when my beautiful mum died of this shitty disease, (40 years ago ) her passing was anything but peaceful, my only wish now is that when it s my turn to die of this leviathan that my daughter finds it a peaceful episode. xx please God a cure soon
gods speed x

tillycat
Member

Re: Miss you Mum. Love you Mum.

I am so sad to hear your news
Glad you were able to be with her
Much love
Melissa

belinda
Member

Re: Miss you Mum. Love you Mum.

Thank you for the email Val. I'm so sorry to hear this sad news but I'm glad all was peaceful and calm and your Mum had yourself and your Dad by her side. Take Care Val, Love Belinda..xxxx
mfb
Member

Re: Miss you Mum. Love you Mum.

It is coming up to 24 years since my Mum died; she was 53 but age doesn't matter when it is your Mum. I was thankful to be with her at the end and to know that she was peaceful. You spoke of this Val and it might not seem like it immediately whilst emotions are still raw but I hope that it will help in time.
Keeping you in my thoughts scottishlass,
Sxx

suzan
Member

Re: Miss you Mum. Love you Mum.

Hi val. thinking of you at this very sad time. Take care love Suzanne.

Midge
Member

Re: Miss you Mum. Love you Mum.

Really sorry to hear this Val. take care of yourself.

Debx

maltomlin
Member

Re: Miss you Mum. Love you Mum.

I'm so sorry. I know how hard this is.
Just take care of yourself.

scottishlass
Member

Miss you Mum. Love you Mum.

My Mum passed away yesterday and I have been busy making funeral arrangements. Dad and I were with her and she was calm and peaceful. Miss you Mum. LOve Val