More mature post menopausal women

[Mezzomamma]

Good luck, Stella.

Cheryl

[dancing_girl]

Thanks Cheryl and Mammie,

Just taken the double dose steroids in preparation for TAX tomorrow. I didn't seep on steroid days on half of this, so don't hold out much hope for sweet dreams tonight.
I'm also going to have a blood test. i went down to local hosp yesterday - they had said come any time. I arrived to find a notice apologising for sudden closing of afternoon session. checked with chemo unit - OK to have it done this am.
Also going to make insulated covers for the peas for my hands in the hope of helping to ward off neuropathy problems!

Stella xx

[Guest user]

Hi dancing girl
Good to hear that you are carrying on with treatment and good luck with the Tax. Not as bad as the FEC. Take care Pat xxx

[Mezzomamma]

I'm glad you don't have the complication of another operation, Stella. Going on with the tax is surely enough. Perhaps the gap will help in the long run. Good luck with it.

Cheryl

[Guest user]

Hi girls

Sorry val that you have had to join us, i was a bit resistant too, but have found this website and community invaluable. I agree the unknown is always frightening but its not as bad as i thought. Relief sets in at every stage. Good luck xx

[dancing_girl]

Hi Girls

Sorry you had to join us Val.

Just heard from my onc - I don't need an operation so I can restart chemo on Thursday - first TAX - now that's a scary thought. But I'm pleased to be getting on with it after this gap. It will be seven weeks after the last FEC.

Stella xx

[Guest user]

Hi Val

I had a bi lateral MX 2 years ago now and totally agree with all the comments made by the other golden girls.

You are in scary place right now but it will get better, ask absolutely anything you want even if the question seems trivial or daft. One of us will have had the same thoughts and worries.

Let us know how you got on at the hospital.

Be kind to yourself

Love and Hugs

Sndie

[ragamuffin]

Hi Val- just wanted to say sorry that you have joined us but if we can help we will. I asked alot of daft questions when I first posted but nobody laughed at me and I got answers to all my questions. So go ahead ask anything. I agree with Lavender Lassie and Pattymi, the thought is worse than the actuality- imagination can be a very fearsome thing. Let us know how the hospital visit went.
All the best Diana

[Lavenderlassie]

Hallo Val,
It is all a shock to the system, I spent most of the first week in denial. I had a mastectomy and axillary clearance end of July last year and found it not as bad as I expected, agree about doing the arm exercises. The breast care nurses were very helpful. Again a vote for front fastening PJs, so you can be checked out without total exposure.
Hope you find the forums helpful, I have.
Lavender Lassie

[Guest user]

Thankyou all so much for your comments. It's quite comforting to know I'm not alone. I'll be in touch tomorrow after my hospital visit Best wishes to all Val

[pattymi]

Hi Val, welcome to the bcc club, although I'm sure we would all rather no be here.
I had my mx in nov, found pyjamas a good thing as you can be examined without being totally naked, it can be hot in there so not too warm and fleecy.
I found that I didn't have much pain at first, a nasty couple of hours with some nerve pain but that was soon under control. Do do your exercises as arm can seize up quickly. To be honest I was pleasantly surprised, the experience was not as bad as I thought it would be.
Pat

[Mezzomamma]

Hi Val, I'm sorry you have to join us, although I'm sure we will enjoy getting to know you. Yes, it is a terrible shock. Many of us find that waiting for treatment is very stressful, but that it helps to talk to someone who knows what you are talking (or writing) about. Pre-assessments can take quite a while as you wait your turn for the tests, at least at our hospital, so I suggest taking something to read and at least a bottle of water. If you have someone who can go with you and chat to take your mind of things, that should help as well.

I tried to keep busy during the time before my surgery, so as not to get too anxious. I haven't had a mastectomy, but I'm sure someone else can give you tips about making life more comfortable while you recover. I think most people wear pajamas even if they normallly wear a nightie, for example, because it's easier to get in and out of pajamas. You should get information about what you should bring with you on the day of the operation, and about going home again.

Do you have a breast care nurse to contact? They are very good at answering questions or worries you may think of between appointments, and of course there is a help line here.

[Lucy_BCC]

Hi Val and welcome to the BCC forums

I am sure you will receive plenty of support here from your fellow users and in addition you may find it helpful to call our helpline where you can talk things through with one of our team in confidence. The line is open weekdays 9-5 and sat 9-2 on 0808 800 6000.

We have published a resource pack which contains lots of information you may find useful and you can order a copy of this here:

http://www.breastcancercare.org.uk/healthcare-professionals/publications/quick-order-list/*/changeTe...

Take care
Lucy

[Guest user]

Hi everyone Im a 76yr old widow. I had a nasty shock a couple of days before Christmas when I was diagnosed with breast cancer.^Things have moved pretty quickly since and I go to hospital to-morrow for my pre-assessment for a mastectomy on 21st January. This is all very new to me and I would be glad of your support and any helpful suggestions. Many Thanks
Val

[Mezzomamma]

I'm sure you don't need appendicitis or an abcess at the moment. Let's hope they can control it without having to interrupt the chemo, so you can get that over.

Cheryl

[dancing_girl]

So sorry to hear about your husband Andie - it must be hard for him - and you. I know my husband would be lost if he couldn't drive.

Cheryl you are so right - you think things will get easier as your children become adults, but there are so many things that can come along to make life difficult.

I saw the onc earlier - not much further forward. Unfortunately he had not spoken to the surgeon about the result of the scan. (He seemed a bit wrong footed when he realised).
He looked at the latest scan on the computer and told me that it had not been my appendix, but an inflamed mass/abscess on the caecum (part of bowel near appendix). However he did not know until he had spoken to the surgeon whether I needed an operation or not. They have promised to ring tomorrow or Thursday. booked for resumption of chemo on Thursday 20th if no operation required.

So I'm still waiting.

Stella xxx

[Mezzomamma]

My sympathies to your husband, not just for the epilepsy but for the loss of mobility. This has really hit some of my older relatives very hard, especially people who had spent their lives doing things for other people, including driving. (Worse are cases of people I know of who had terrible accidents before they quit driving.) I hope they are able to keep it under control for him.

Sometimes life is simply NOT FAIR.

[Guest user]

Hi
Cheryl I so agree with you, especially about spouses aging along side us. Late last year my husband who had been an absolute rock throughout my treatment suddenly developed late onset epilepsy. We were in a situation where I had finished active treatment and we should have been able to find a new normal to our lives. Instead he came home from work one evening and I found him on the floor having a full blown epileptic fit, which was followed 2 months later by a second.He immediately lost his driving license. As a man with 2 motor bikes and a car the lost of independence has been catastrophic. For the last year I have been a total nervous wreck waiting to see if it would happen again - at least I did stop worrying about myself, I just didn't have the time.

I really am not enjoying this getting older lark!

Andie

[Mezzomamma]

I'm sure having some dates and answers will help, but wouldn't it be nice if we didn't have so much else to cope with? Maybe not young kids, but grown kids with problems, aging parents or siblings, suddenly finding yourself the older generation with no one left above you in the family tree, spouses aging and having their own health problems. Later middle age and early older age aren't always a time to take things easy, are they?

[dancing_girl]

Thanks ladies,

I have an appointment with my oncologist this afternoon so hope to get some definite dates and answers. I'll let you know.

Best wishes to all with bc related problems or other things like thyroid problems.

Stella

[Guest user]

Hi dancing Girl, was a bit worried that you had not appeared on this thread after your 1st TAX was due, sorry to hear you had this added complication and the news of your son. Hope all works out in the long run. Keep us posted on your progress.
Yes to all of you that thyroid is a definite thing to keep an eye on and if you feel more than just tired after the rads etc get you levels checked.
Take care to all of you Pat xxx

[Guest user]

Yes, it is Cheryl. Strangely our oldest Son has an under active thyroid, and on tabs for life, whereas, if my prob settles, I may not be on tabs for too long.
Sorry, Stella, forgot to thank you for referral to other thread, now going to look at it.
x

[Mezzomamma]

At least thyroid is treatable, if need be. One of my sisters has low thyroid, just a side effect of getting older in her case.

[Guest user]

Stella- what rotten luck about your appendix, and having to wait for the Op before your treatment can continue ( I hope it all goes better for you and treatment can continue). It's very sad about your Son, I do feel for you, having 3 Sons of my own , and it was bad enough when middle one was under the Doc and Community Mmental Health nurse for depression 7 years ago... you feel helpless, and I'll never forget that period of time. Your problems make my worries seem more inconsequential,and I feel bad for grumbling about them.
Cheryl- I hadn't thought of that with the thyroid thing, either, I was surprised when the nurse said that, I wish I had got my Surgeon to confirm or dispute it when she came back in the room, but I wasn't on the ball enough! OH is just NOT a worrier, and I obviously am, guess we balance each other out?!
Hugs,
Heather.xx

[dancing_girl]

Sorry should say 'there's a link' not 'there's a like'

[dancing_girl]

Hello everyone,

half Scottish - There is a thread called "thought I would feel great" under 'After treatment has finished' It's common to feel depressed and there is a like to a talk given by a counsellor/psychologist on the subject.

I'm a bit fed up as I had 3 x FEC and was due to have the first of three TAX on 23rd of December. However I managed to get appendicitis and spent 11 days in hosp on intravenous antibiotics and have just finished 10 days of oral antibiotics. I see the oncologist on Tuesday. Hopefully I will find out when the appendix will be removed - definitely no more treatment until it has gone. I hoped I would have had the op by now. Then I have to wait until I've recovered before any more chemo and if the gap is too long they may not continue it. All rather worrying and I envisage all those cancer cells taking advantage of the delay.

I'm lucky to have a very supportive OH. It must be hard, kathybro, when your OH finds that being an ostrich is his coping strategy. Glad he is coping better now and hope that you can both enjoy being by the coast.
My younger son had to be admitted to a mental ward with psychosis on the day I had my lumpectomy - we hadn't realised until then that he was in denial. He is now suffering from severe depression. OH has been very good at supporting us both.

Good luck everyone whatever stage you are at.

Stella xx

[Mezzomamma]

Hi Heather, I hadn't heard about the thyroid issue before, so it's good to know this is something to look out for if you are losing weight after treatment. Your OH probably just can't face the thought of you being ill again.

We're here to share.

Best wishes,

Cheryl

[Guest user]

Hi Andie and everyone,
can I join your golden girls group, as i was diagnosed last April, aged 63, and can relate so much to what you're saying! My active treatment finished before Christmas, and I should be over the moon (after having a bad time with my bloods during chemo), but I still worry that something is going to go wrong! I'm on Arimidex for 5 years, which is normal, but also on Carbimazole as I was diagnosed with an over active thyroid 6 weeks ago. I had thought I was losing weight rapidly, post chemo, because of my poor appetite, or WORSE, but now have regained nearly 8lbs! Relief! My Surgeon's Nurse actually said to me, when we were on our own, that chemo can sometimes trigger off a throid problem! Great! I sit, quietly worrying about what else will happen, and wish I didn't! I don't tell OH, because he wouldn't understand, to him the treatment is finished, and I'm OK. If only I could have his attitude! Good to be able to off load to you girls!
Hugs,
Heather.xx

[Guest user]

Hi Kathy

Welcome to our golden girls group. I was DX 2 years ago (63 now) and have found that the most stressful times for me have been when a course of treatment has finished. At the end of chemo I worried that the nasty little cells were just waiting to pounce agin. Then at the end of rads I felt the same. After a year of Herceptin I was so convinced that I still needed it that my husband I researched continuing it privately althought the onc assured me it was unnecesssary and I let that plan drop. Also we would have had to remortgage to do it!

Also it comes up a lot on the forums that while we are having active treatment we feel as if something is being done and when it as all over and we are on our own again depression often sets in. It certainly did for me and I asked for counselling which helped enormously.

Love and Hugs

Andie

[Mezzomamma]

I think it probably is normal to feel anxious with each new stage of treatment, never mind being in a new area. It's difficult when family members' coping strategies make things worse for you and denial and refusing to talk must be among the worse. I'm pretty sure I've seen posts from other women who are also stressed about treatments like tamoxifan and what comes after. Those might be helpful for you.

[Guest user]

I wish I had come onto this site earlier one in my diagnosis and treatment. I have two girls who have been very supportive via the telephone, a son who tried very hard and a hubby who became an ostrich. Having just moved to go then for a mamogram and get this news was devastating. Hubby could not cope. I attended every appointment on my own, which was not too bad but as he wouldn't talk about it when I got back this made me very angry and resentful. We finally got over this and he ok now. I am sixty, felt after the move to the coast I was embarking on a new life, just not this one. I have just finished radiotherapy and am on Tamoxifen. I actually feel more anxious now than at anytime since diagnosis, is this normal?

[Mezzomamma]

Thanks, Wendy.

Have you tried putting the cream in a warm place, or rubbing it between your hands to warm it a little? Even a nice cream may need to be warmed up a little in this weather, and then it spreads better as well. Or put in on actually in the bath, or in the shower while it's still steamy and let the heat and moisture help spread it thinly and evenly.

Unfortunately, cheaper and more basic skin products don't usually apply so well--they're more likely to be sticky or greasy on your skin. Of course lack of the better absorption factors may be partly why aqueous cream and E45 are approved for rads. I'm feeding my skin up with something nicer until I have to switch.

Cheryl

[Guest user]

Hi

Eileen when I had my rads I hated the aqueous cream it was so slimy and thick. I used E45 cream instead and it was fine

Andie

[Guest user]

Hi Everyone,
I hate aqueous cream too. It is so cold! I seem to have got away with skin problems but have chronic tiredness. I have to sleep for a couple of hours every afternoon so have been signed off work for another month. I remember when life used to be so simple, Eileen, wish I'd appreciated it at the time more!
Hope you're feeling ok, Cheryl,
Wendy x

[Mezzomamma]

I was trying to be calm and patient, but when you don't really know what to expect, it's very difficult. More so when everyone else seems to go in for treatment and you are still sitting there waiting.

Once long ago I was forgotten in a waiting room, with a small child with me no less. Someone had put the new folders on top of mine instead of under, so now I do go ask when it seems to be unreasonable. And another time, when my name was called on the other side of a big noisy waiting room, I wasn't sure so someone else stood up, I thought it wasn't me. SO I do go check, trying to be polite but assertive, when the wait seems unreasonable. I suspect it's more distressed, but I do my best.

[Guest user]

Hi Cheryl

Glad the day went OK. Unfortunately I always found one of the worst parts of the actual being at the hospital for chemo was the anxiety of the wait to get started. Now take it easy and be kind to yourself.

Love and hugs

Andie

[Mezzomamma]

First treatment over and no immediate problems aside from the 3 1/2 hour wait. More details on Anxious about starting FEC in Jan thread, if anyone is interested.

I'm just about off to bed.

[Guest user]

I preferred the early appts as when I had pm appts I didn't get home till seven whereas although I was picked up very early for am ones at least I got home by two. Still feeling very itchy can't wait to be able to to use my normal creams etc- I hate aqueous cream!!!
Feeling apprehensive about appt with Gynaecologist next Wed. I had some bleeding late Nov (five years since last period) happened to mention it to onc in Dec and she referred me to gyny. I am sure it was stress caused by dx but she said it needs investigating. I keep getting pelvic discomfort but I have so many aches and pains these days that I am not sure what causes what. Life used to be so simple.Glad you are nearing end of rads Wendy
Eileen xx

[Mezzomamma]

That sounds like a light at the end of a tunnel. I hope it's fireworks.

[Guest user]

Mine were all late last week (6pm) so asked for ones a bit earlier!!! I expect I had the times nobody wants as asked to be fitted in when they wanted me to start after Christmas. Only 6 more days and I finish 🙂

[Mezzomamma]

It would be nice to have a mild spell, wouldn't it? Can they change your time at all? Last time I started out with end of the day ones because I was still working, which meant terrible traffic, made worse by hospital construction traffic. When I took time off a little more than half way through they were able to find some earlier slots for me.

[Guest user]

Good luck with the FEC, Cheryl.
settled in nicely into 2011 but wish my rads appointments weren't all at 8.30 in the morning.
Fingers crossed it doesn't snow at the weekend,
Happy New Year,
Wendy

[Mezzomamma]

How is everyone? Settled into 2011 yet?

I start FEC tomorrow, so I'm a bit nervous and trying to fill up the time in between.

Best wishes to all,

Cheryl

[scottishlass]

Happy New Year Val....and everyone else on here too of course. I am heading for year 22 from original diagnosis....12 from bone mets.....and have no plans on going soon if I can manage it. Love Val

[horace]

A very Happy New Year from me too.
If all goes well then 2011 will see me 5yrs on from dx [in October] but it seems a very long way away.
Stay Well ladies
Vxx

[Guest user]

HI Golden Girls
Happy New Year to everyone and good luck to those nearing the end of their journey and those (like me) who still have a long way to go
Love
Janet

[swallowtail]

Happy New Year everyone, and hoping that 2011 is a better year for us all,
Celia.x

[Guest user]

Happy New Year everyone I have had a lovely Christmas at my son's am going home on Sunday. Here's hoping that 2011 is a better year for everyone. xxxx

[Eliza]

A happy and healthy New Year to all the Golden Girls!

Eliza xx

[ragamuffin]

Hi Golden Girls
Just want to wish everyone a Happy and Healthy New Year! By this time in 2011 all this will be behind us.
Love Diana