I feel so shallow to be struggling with my issues having read some of the stories here but I can’t stop crying so here we go …
Felt a small lump which I tried to ignore for a few weeks assuming it was hormonal. Didn’t change so saw GP who didn’t reckon it was a “nasty lump” but referred me to breast clinic to be on the safe side. Initial consultation suspected fat necrosis but mammogram lead to ultrasound to core biopsies and then a week later confirmed invasive carcinoma. ER8 and PR8, nothing seen in lymph nodes so I should be happy, right?
So I know my prognosis is good - plan is for wide local excision, radiotherapy and tamoxifen and I’ll live happily ever after. So why can I not get my head around the body image issues? I’m hardly the body beautiful anyway, have a lovely supportive husband and couldn’t have been more than a couple of years away from the menopause anyway so why am I not reassured by being told that my deformed breast will have “a bit of a dip”, my scar will be “a wrinkle” and I can manage the tamoxifen side effects with lubricant and dieting!
I’m so, so sorry for those of you in life limiting situations but does anyone else in my situation feel like this?
Hi Kittkatt
Welcome to the forums, I hope you find them to be a great source of information and support. Whilst you are waiting for the other users to reply with their experiences you might find it helpful to talk things through with a member of staff on the BCC helpline. Here you can share your fears and concerns with some one who will offer you a listening ear as well as emotional support and practical information. The number to call is
0808 800 6000 and lines are open today 10 to 2pm and weekdays 9 to 5pm.
Best wishes Sam, BCC Facilitator
Thanks Shar - I appreciate the support . X
Hi kitkat, don’t feel silly at all I’m currently awaiting my surgery for grade 3 idc tn. Which means chemo for me then radio as there are no other courses of action. I’m 31. My surgeon has said in a lot of cases the Breast doesn’t end up looking to dissimilar so I guess we just wait and see. At the mo I’m thinking more about how to have my very long hair cut! I know that sounds trivial but I’d much rather donate it to a good cause than the bin and I’m getting uptight about the fact that short hair won’t suit me!! So who knows what I’ll be like if/when it starts coming out x x
Aw sharbansh! Some days are rotten. Don’t think ahead to if you’ll enjoy christmas. Take one day at a time and then reflect on the day, I’ve started writing a diary. You will find something positive from every day and believe me I’ve had my fair few rough days ESP with my 2 kids & husband being really poorly. I’ve been the healthiest one in the house hold lol. If you worry about not enjoying it you won’t be able to. Cancer doesn’t deserve worry or fear. Some one said to me there are a few things cancer cells can’t invade, your courage, your faith & your soul. I hope you start feeling more positive soon x x
Oh woodview it can be completely overwhelming at times but believe me when I say b4 my diagnosis I was beside myself with worry and fear. I truly hope they have good news for you but if it isn’t you’ll be surprised at just how strong you are and have to be. When I got my dx everything came into perspective after the fog of awaiting results. Try not to worry so that you can go into your appointment with a clear head. Take someone with you who you know will keep it together for you so they can listen to what’s being said. Thinking of you & fingers crossed x x
Hi Kittkatt
I had a high grade DCIS unfortunately it was behind my nipple so my WLE included removal of the nipple and aerola. I cant tell you how upset I was at first, I felt like I was going to look like a circus freak and did nothing but worry and cry, but you know what, now that its over with it really doesnt bother me at all!! All in all I have probably lost about a cup size in bra but I do think its a small price to pay to be cancer free. I wasnt so lucky but the vast majorty of women dont lose as much as me and from all the photos I have seen post op the most you will see is a small dip about the size of a 50p and a very small scar about an inch which will fade over time. Please try not to be upset over it I’m sure it wont be as bad as you might think. xx