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New journey - hopefully happy ending

14 REPLIES 14
mandy-me
Member

Re: New journey - hopefully happy ending

Thank you so much Mandy for your concern, yes its bad. I am trying hard to be strong dont think its working, its not knowing and waiting….. and always thinking the worse.

Hope you hear soon about your chemo and like you said… we will get though this… whatever it takes eh?...... trying to be strong.

Mandy x

Mandy11
Member

Re: New journey - hopefully happy ending

Thinking of you, had my op two weeks ago all went well waiting to hear when I start chemo. Stay positive and you will get through this. Get in touch if you fancy a chat or an incite on what to expect. Stay strong! X
mandy-me
Member

Re: New journey - hopefully happy ending

Hi Mrs Mogg, bet it was nice to have a few days away and hopefully think of much nicer things.

 

There is me thinking I would try going healthy ready for the op, even dug out my old juicer and bought the organic carrots….. that lasted all of 2 days, took me ages what with washing, chopping and juicing let alone all the mess to clear up after…. took me ages to work out how it all went back together the next day! Read your idea about the wine, needless to say the juicer is back in its box! Cheers to that....well grapes are one of your 5 a-day eh?

 

My house is totally upside down, we had just started decorating when this bombshell hit, which had to be left for appointments etc. The idea was to have it all ready for changing boiler, finish plastering, and putting flooring down when the two wanderers returned….. hmmm so much for plans!

 

We are going through this at much the same time and like you said, its going to come round really quick but we are both going to do this (have no choice, lol) and come out the other side with better things to think about…. Well apart from the results, oh and the treatments…… scratch better things lets say different 🙂 

 

Mandy x

 

Tried but could not get the pm thing to work

MrsMogg
Member

Re: New journey - hopefully happy ending

Mandy, I'm due to have my operation on the 2nd October.....seems ages away, but it will be here sickeningly quick. I would have done the same about the operation  ( stuck to the same hospital) plus the added worry about your husband is something you can do without, and it would be nice to have a weekend with him before you go into hospital so you can do something special.

 

No tears today -  I came home from a few days away and I have found a delicious wine in Lidl  which I had a glass of whilst watching the GBBO..  House is a ruddy mess tho!..ah well......theres another 5 glasses in the bottle......

 

Back to work tomorrow...

 

 

Mrs Mogg

mandy-me
Member

Re: New journey - hopefully happy ending

Had a phone call about my surgery today, they wanted me to have it on the 25th with a different surgeon and at a different hospital. My husband is due back on the evening of the 24th and it would be a bit of a risk of him being delayed etc and not only that I would not like to change surgeons or hospitals. After a lot of talking between the caller and another person, I could hear my Doctors name mentioned so I said I wanted my original Doctor and my chosen hospital. I have now got the 1st October with the Doctor and hospital as planned but I have to go to the other hospital first thing of that morning to have the radioactive dye and the trace wire then travel to my chosen hospital for my surgery in the afternoon….. so not to plan.... this dont bode well............feeling very unsettled now!

mandy-me
Member

Re: New journey - hopefully happy ending

Hi Mrs Mogg

 

Awww…. I hope you have had a successful day and haven’t needed to have a cry x

 

I am new here too. Sounds like we are both roughly at the same stage. Yes you are right about not knowing. I am also finding odd aches and pains harder to shrug off as being unimportant which is sometimes scary. Just have to take it one stage at a time. I try not to think past the surgery at the moment because it sends my brain cell into overload with what ifs.

 

I received my appointment letter this morning to go for my pre-op assessment, which reminded me it wasn’t a dream (nightmare) I go next Thursday.

 

Oh my… you are so organised about the bra, this has never been mentioned to me and the thought of having to have one must have been in my head somewhere….. dunno where though…… as you can tell my head is not into this! Will have to have a think of what I will need….. and make a list (can’t trust my head!!)

 

Will have a look for the PM thingy 

 

Best wishes and hugs

Mandy x

mandy-me
Member

Re: New journey - hopefully happy ending

Thank you for your reply Nel

 

Yes I have read a few threads on these forums in the few weeks leading up to my biopsy results and hospital appointment and I can see all the care and support everyone is giving and getting. This is what made me join and write in. I think the support is so comforting especially as it is from ladies, like yourself currently going through it.

 

I particularly liked the part of your reply…… ‘but you know what you will beat this’  which I read again and again… I will and you will…. whatever it takes eh?

 

Wishing you all the very best as you go on your journey xx

MrsMogg
Member

Re: New journey - hopefully happy ending

Hello Mandy,

I am new here, and waiting for my surgery. I think the worst thing is not knowing what is going to happen next.  I have taken a few days out just for me, just to get my head together, but the phantom of what might be round the corner does rear its head every now and again.  A measure of success is if I haven't  cried that day!  Came close yesterday looking at breastfeeding bras to wear after the operation.  Gawd, I never thought I'd be looking at those again ( though it has to be said, they are a lot nicer than the ones I had to wear twenty odd years ago)

I am a very positive person - so if you would like to PM me, please feel free to ( I haven't been PM'd before....all new!)

 

sending you fuzzie hugs,

 

 

Mrs Mogg

Nel
Member

Re: New journey - hopefully happy ending

Mandy-me of course people care. We all care for each other on this forum. I am normally a very honest and forthright person. I have had my ups and downs recently. But you know what u will beat this and no one here will think poor you. As you go on your journey you will soon be able to support others too. I also had to deal with my son being unconsolable but I turned this into a positive by feeling that I as able to be there for him as he is having marital problems and he comes to his weemammy for support. Keep us updated we are all here for each other hugs xx
mandy-me
Member

Re: New journey - hopefully happy ending

Hi

 

Thank you so much for your replies and kind words.

 

Packed them both off early hours this morning. Timing for this bombshell could have been better but today has not been as bad as I thought it would be. I was so worried I would panic and get really upset but this bit of quiet time alone where I have not had to put on a ‘brave face’ for anyone has been a bit of a relief.

 

Apart from my good friend I really do not have anyone I feel comfortable with enough to tell, the thought of telling anyone makes me feel I am burdening or upsetting them.

 

While I know its evasive and my lymph nodes are enlarged I think it is still not knowing what course its going to take until after the surgery results…. so it is coming to terms with what has happened so far while I wait for my appointment.

 

I don’t know if it has sunk in or not, just feel a bit numb.

 

Wishing you all the very best

 

Mandy

mandy-me
Member

Re: New journey - hopefully happy ending

Hi Jo
Thank you for replying and thank you for the information
Kind regards…. Mandy
Kess
Member

Re: New journey - hopefully happy ending

Hi it sounds like you are trying to be the rock in this and you are doing amazingly well. However I do think you do need to allow yourself time to feel sadness and anger too. What you are going through is tough.

I suspect you will be surprised at how many people will care a lot. And some people who you may have not realised you could depend on will go the extra mile for you. I found this - some "casual" friends have become amongst my strongest supporters/
mary32
Member

Re: New journey - hopefully happy ending

Hi Mandy

 

I am sorry that you have got this diagnosis, specially at a time when you're nearest and dearest are about to go off for a break. Everyone here is great and will certainly offer you support and words of encouragement.

 

It is a difficult one, who to tell. I think initially I told lots of people and in hindsight there are a couple I wish I hadn't told and perhaps more details than were necessary.

 

It takes a while for it to sink in so perhaps this quiet time will help you come to terms with it a little.

 

Take care.

 

Mary

Jo_BCC
Member

Re: New journey - hopefully happy ending

Hi Mandy-me

 

Welcome to the BCC discussion forums. You've come to the right place for the support you are looking for, as the users of this website understand what you are going through and are a wonderful support to one another.  Plus our helpline team are only a free phone call away if you want to talk to someone in confidence for both practical and emotional support so please don't hesitate to ring them.  0808 800 6000 lines ope weekdays 9-5 and Saturdays 10-2.

 

Also available to you as well as the above is a session we run each Thursday evening between 8.30pm and 9.30pm is our General Live chat, here you can 'talk' to others in real time and at the same time a nurse is also there to answer any questions you may have and support you.  I will put you the link to Live Chat below for you to have a look at.  The only thing I would point out regading Live Chat is at the moment this can only be accessed via a laptop/desktop computer as the system we are currently using will not work with tablets/phones -but we are working on this!

 

http://www.breastcancercare.org.uk/community/chat

 

I have also put for you below the link to one of BCC's publications - your operation and recovery - which I hope you find helpful.

 

http://www2.breastcancercare.org.uk/publications/treatment-side-effects/your-operation-recovery-bcc1...

 

Take care,

Jo, Moderator

mandy-me
Member

New journey - hopefully happy ending

Just recently been diagnosed, I have to be so thankful to the Breast Screening for this and cannot praise them enough for their support and kindness

After core biopsy was told Ductal Cancer Grade 3 and referred to my chosen hospital.

Had my appointment yesterday and operation was explained and accepted, consent forms signed for lumpectomy and centennial node surgery, with other treaments before and after results.

All along my husband has been with me but I think I have supported him, he cried when we both told. I have 2 sons – 1 in New Zealand, he is going through very hard marital problems which involves 2 grand children and has depression – My other son has mental health problems, I am his carer and appointee and he relies on only me, he is just making improvements with the new medication.

The only person I have told is my best friend, thinking I will say only when I think its needed.

After tomorrow I will have lost my immediate and closest as he will be taking my son on annual holiday for 2 weeks (can’t tell you how he has been looking forward to this trusts nobody else) My husband did not want to go but I would rather have that than try to explain to my son. Also consultant said operation wouldn’t be in the next 2 weeks. As said feel I can’t tell other son in New Zealand.

To cap it all my best friend will be away for 10 days over the 2 weeks my husband is away.

Just thinking……. I have nobody else to tell (well nobody that would really care)….. Even though I let on I am strong and shrug it off for everyone else….perhaps I am not strong…. maybe I want to tell everyone because I (yes ME) I want support. Don’t want ‘poor you’ ..........just encouragement.