Hi I’m 43 and was diagnosed with breast cancer at beginning of July. Mastectomy and all lymph nodes removed.all contained cancer.found out last week that I have bone mets in spine, pelvis and hips.over the weekend ive been having sciatic pain in back.starting chemo next week. Bone scan the week after . can’t stop crying.so scared. I don’t want to die.please help
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Hello Annmarie43
Welcome to the forums, this must be a very difficult time for you.
As well as the support you will receive on the forums we also have a free helpline where you can talk things through with a member of staff who are there to offer emotional support as well as practical information. The free phone number is 0808 800 6000 and the lines are open Monday to Friday 9.00 to 5.00 and Saturday 10.00 to 2.00.
I’ve also attached a link to our thread on bone mets where I’m sure you will get lots of support from the users who post on there forum.breastcancercare.org.uk/t5/Living-with-secondary-breast/Bone-mets-please-join-in/m-p/873927#M53822
With best wishes
June, moderator
Hi AnneMarie…Im s sorry you have had to join us on this thread. …and I can just imagine the panic and fear you are feeling at the moment…but things do get alittle easier and you will be able to look beyond the panic when you have started a treatment plan…I was diagnosed with mets in my vertebrae a few years after my primary BC, about 31/2 years ago …and there are many ,many people who survive for long periods of time with secondaries (see Belindas post for example towards the top of the bone mets thread…11 years)…If you are having a lot of pain in your back/down your leg, and especially if it is associated with unsteadiness /numbness/ or difficulty having a wee then do something about it today…maybe ring the hospital if you have a contact number or think of out of hours service. Otherwise leave it till after the weekend but then discuss with the team looking after you…It could just be stress if you are olding your muscles tightly but best to get it checked out. Have a look at the bone mets thread …its a very chatty thread and you will find a lot of good advice there. Best wishes Pamx
Hi,annmarie, so sorry you are joining us. We all understand what a totally terrifiying time this is and it’s only natural to be scared and cry .You will get lots of support on here we are a very friendly bunch of supportive ladies. We hang out on the bone mets thread mainly so join in and ask us anything. We are there for advice,support,a rant,a laugh( it’s sounds strange but we do) and always plenty of hugs.
Massive hugs coming your way,Helen xxxxxxxxxxx
Hi annmarie, I was diagnosed with bone mets from the start too. It’s such a shock but you will find a way of moving forward, we all do. Be kind to yourself. And do join us on the bone mets thread, you will find much support there.
Hi Annmarie. Sorry youve had to join our group its very scary at first. I was dx in may but with lung mets but I hang out on here too. I’m a bone met troll hehe! You’ll soon find that a few of us are as mad as a box of frogs!
Anyway you will find things get better after youve had your treatment plan. I thought I would cry forever when I had my dx and I’d have no tears left but you’ll be fine especially when the Onc reassures you with the many options of treatment available.
Good luck on this journey ?
Love and hugz…bev ?
Hi Annmarie, so sorry you have had to join us, but you will be greeted with open arms, we all understand how you are feeling as we have been there.
I had primary in 2007 then was dx with bone mets in March and my world fell apart, but im now on my treatment plan and am feeling a lot stronger both mentally and physically, this forum has been a life line for me all the ladies on here are so warm and supportive.
I hope your treatment starts soon and you start to a bit a better.
Stay strong love Janette x x x
Hi annmarie. I have recently been diagnosed too and understand completely your fears and worries. Its still very new to me after a 10 year gap after my first diagnosis but i do know you will feel better once your treatment plan gets your pain under more control. I feel like im on a rollercoaster with all the ups and downs but my oncologist told me treatment has improved somuch in the last few years and that along with the posts on this site gas really helped me. I hope you soon feel the same.
Love carol x
Hi Annemarie, just wanted to say hi and we’re all here for you. What a shock you’ve had. You are in the most scariest place at the moment but things will get easier over time. Do you know what type of cancer you have - hormone or her2positive. When you feel able try to look through some of the threads which match up to the type of chemo you are going to be having. There are lots of helpful pointers about how to deal with any side effects etc which you may get - not everyone has the same so don’t think you’re going to get all of them - you might not get any but sometimes being prepared helps you when on chemo. We’re all here to help you and hold your hand throughout the treatment. Never be afraid to ask us a question, rant or rage on here. We all do it and feel a lot better afterwards. As the other ladies have said we all mainly hang out on the bone mets thread so please come and join us. You will be made most welcome.
I hope your pain is easing - however if it is still bad tomorrow please ring your breast care nurse at the hospital as she will be able to tell you what to do. Never put up with any pain or think you’re being difficult by asking someone for advice. That is what your breast care nurse is there to do.
Thinking of you and huge hugs xxxx
Hi Annmarie
Goodness I feel for you, I had breast cancer 12 years ago and now told I have secondary in my stomach lining I am 65 but still don’t want to die, but no one is ever going to tell you that you are not, that is the scary thing, I would, like you, like to know of someone who has fought secondary and gone on to lead a decent life. I am with you on the scary thing, I have not been able to cry but scared out of my wits, I am seeing the oncologist on Monday and hopefully will get some answers and start some treatment. I want this thing inside me zapped as soon as.
I am sorry I have no words of wisdom for you as I am in the same situation but I am thinking of you and your situation. I don’t have religion to fall back on so no prayers only positive thinking.
Take care, I have coped this last week by going out all the time.
Maggiemc