Hi, I am 34 with a 17month old girl, I have been reading some of your posts and decided to register on this site.
I was told yesterday that I have a grade 3 cancer which has already been removed (lumpectomy) with clear margins, 3 nodes removed for testing and one node had a micro deposit in am also HER positive.
Am due for a full clearance of all nodes next Thursday 13th.
I am just so worried that some of the other nodes will have cancer in? Have been told that I will be having chemo, radiotherapy and Herceptin. Not sure how I feel at the moment my head seems to be all over the place?
I lost both my Mum and Dad to cancer (brain tumour) when I was a little girl and that is always at the front of mind since being diagnosed.
Bunny3, so sorry that you have had to join us. You will feel lost until you have a treatment plan - but you will be able to get through it. The only advice I can give is the same that was given to me… dont ‘google’, keep busy (with a 17 month old that wont be difficult!).
Wishing you lots of best wishes, and as much as it feels impossible at the moment, you will get through this.
Marguerite
Hi, sorry to hear you are going through this hell to. My little girl was 19 months old when I was diagnosed in March 2009. In some ways I think the age is better as they don’t understand. My little girl is 3 and she remembers nothing of my chemo days and me being in hospital. I had micro mets in 3 lymph nodes and then they cleared them after my chemo, no cancer in the rest. I only joined here recently but wished I had when I was diagnosed as everyone is so supportive. I won’t lie and say the chemo is easy, but it doesn’t last forever and you will get through it. You say you have lost your Mum and Dad, do you have any other family who can help? My Dad lived with us while I was having chemo and helped out with my little girl. I hope you have someone close to help too. It makes a bad situation more bearable. Thoughts and best wishes, Boo
Hi
I was dx last march, with grade 2 IDC 1 node and her2 pos. I have finished chemo, and rads and am now on herceptin. I was 38 when dx with a2year old and 4year old. My advice is take everything a step at a time. Don’t google and like Maguerite says keep busy. Please keep reading and posting, it really helps to get things off your chest with people who understand. Good luck with your node clearance, I know how scary it is wondering if it is in more, but there is nothing you can do to change the results, so try to give yourself the best chance of recovering from the op well, so you can get on with killing any stray cells with chemo.
Best wishes
Debx
Hi,
Thankyou so much for your very kind words and supportive comments, very much appreciated x
Boo - I have a very supportive and loving fiance who has been wonderful, and I have my brother and sister and there family and my fiances family and some really wonderful friends who are so so supportive couldnt wish for anymore support!
Being HER positive does that make the cancer more difficult to treat? I am a little confused?
Thanks again to you all, and best wishes to you all xx
hi i am also the same age as you and very sim diagnosis and treatment plans . I was dx on the 18th Nov and will be having a full mx chemo radio and hormone the same as you. My children are slightly older 11 and 13 but still no easier to break the news and i expect its harder when you have very young children. i feel much better now i know what they gonna be doing with my tic tac tit sorry but thats what i have nick named strange sense of humour and all that. Which was even stranger when the surgeon said they gonna have to draw on me before surgery my response was dont mnid you playing oxo mid operation but i draw the line at hangman. I will say through all the humour i still feel crappy about the whole situation.But laughing does make it easier. I lost my dad 5 years ago to lymphatic cancer he was dx in the july and passed away in the september. So i can understand your worries. If you want to pm me feel free to do so anything even questions you may think are stupid i have asked some really irrational questions to be honest but you are allowed to be. Hope all goes wellxx my operation is on the 17th jan where are you going for your lymph node clearance xxx oh and yes i agree with deb googling drove me mad.
Penny
Hi alleycat, Thankyou for your response and I am so sorry that you are also going through this and so sorry of the loss of your Dad xx
I must say when reading your entry it did make me laugh about the drawing etc… thankyou!
I had lumpectomy on 23rd Dec and SND and got my results yesterday, no more surgery required for my breast as had clear margins but am to have full node clearance on 13th Jan at WHH in Ashford, Kent, then treatment to follow. I am a little confused about the HER positive as I believe that makes it a more aggressive cancer, am I right?
Best wishes to you xx
Hi Bunny3 and welcome to the BCC forums
In addition to the support you have already received here, BCC offer services specifically aimed at younger women which you may find of interest and you can read more about those here:
breastcancercare.org.uk/about-us/our-services/support-for-younger-women/younger-womens-forums/
You may also find the resource pack published for anyone newly diagnosed useful along with the BCC publication about Herceptin and you can order copies via these links:
Our helpliners are here to offer you further support and information on 0808 800 6000, the line is open weekdays 9-5 and Sat 9-2.
Take care
Lucy
sorry your having to come here but like everyone says keep positive and everything chemo etc is do able. The time passes quickly and i am already half way through chemo.
One thing I will say is that im the sort of person that needs to know everything and face it head on if you are that sort of person do google if your not dont google. I found researching my own cancer helped me to be informed and even surprise the surgeon and oncologist by reminding them to do the things they had forgotten. You have to be strong to sort the crap from the good research. So like they say dont google unless you can handle it. Wishing you all the best.
Bunny3,
I am HER+++ too. Don’t google! Herceptin has only been used for newly diagnosed cancers like ours over the last few years, so a lot of stats you may read are not up to date. Yes, it is more aggressive, but with the herceptin treatment, that effectively raises your chances back up to the same as it would be without the HER+++. I am ER+ too, which is not unusual with younger women, so will have hormone therapy as well for 5 years. ‘another string to our bow,’ was how my onc put it!
Hope that helps. I’ve found it a hard topic to get help on in this forum for, but there are a few women who have posted about it if you trawl back through earlier posts. I had my first dose of herceptin yesterday. If you want to pm message me, am very happy if you think I can help,
Tracey
I am HER+ too. have had my first 2 Herceptin, the rest I will have at home. I am one of the older ones so no young children to worry about. have had MX, chemo and RADS. I didn’t ask about my prognosis but will ask my ONC on the 24thn Jan, I am one who needs to know.
Good luck with everything
Carol
Hi when we say don’t google, we don’t mean don’t ask questions. Talk to your onc about being her +++ and ask about the effectiveness of herceptin. I did google and it worried me more and I had to wait to talk to my onc about it clear things up. I could have done without that worry. The word aggressive is used to describe lots of different types of breast cancer, not just her 2 +++. Hope your onc can help you, but they can’t guarantee us anything. I know women who have tiny, node negative er+ tumours with excellent prognosis who are just as worried. Good luck with your treatment. I have my 3rd herceptin next week and so far no real side effects.
Debx
Hi, all thanks again for all your responses and words of support, very much appreciated x
Is it a standard practice that you are asked to have other scans such as MRI and CT scans etc…, as I vaguely remember my Consultant telling me that they will send me for these scans!
It is just so much to take in, I feel like im rambling now? xx
Absolutely normal to have a whole lot of scans; bone, MRI, CT, PET… you do feel as if you are on a rollercoaster and cabt get off, but time does pass very quickly.
Best wishes
Marguerite
yes i had all those scans done and cried at every one of them mainly because your still trying to come to terms with your breast cancer and the fact that you have it and also the other implications it has upon your life and your emotions. The day i got my dx is kind of a blur and nothing that anyone was saying to me was sinking in, it was only approx 4 weeks later that i started asking the questions that i should of been asking way before. Being told you have breast cancer is a shock to the system and evryone deals with it diffrently and there is no wrong way of dealing with it !!!. My spelling is awful by the way !!!. None of the scans hurt by the way its more the thought of them that sends you into a tizz !!!I hate needles but over the last few weeks ive got to grips with them. im not sure on the her positive making it more aggresive so i wont comment on it as i dont know alot about it as of yet. You will know more after surgery as they will do full tests on what they remove which normally takes 2-3 weeks to be done xx
Best wishesxx Penny
Hi Bunny3,
Hope you are doing ok? Aaargh, waiting! All the scans are given as standard, as we are all told, but it doesn’t help to reassure us does it? Hope you are not too worried. Good luck with the node clearance on the 13th - will get that in now, the Tax and herceptin this week seem to have addled my senses, taking over from where the FEC left off!
Tracey x
Hi Tracey, thanks am abit nervous for the node clearance as I hate having a GA also do you know if you have to stay in hosp after the clearance, I did when I had my lumpectomy and SND cause I had an allergic reation to the blue dye!! (trust me)only for 1 night tho!
I hope you are doing okay? Have you finished your chemo now?
Thanks Penny, yeah it is all abit confusing, I have okay days then days when I am just reduced to tears it is such an emoyional rollercoaster, but I must say chatting with you guys on here has really helped. How are you and hows everything going?
Best wishes to you both
Donna xxx
Hi Donna,
It does help, doesn’t it? I am having my chemo up front, so can’t give any advice on the surgery side. It’s a bit weird in some ways, to be doing it this way round, but good in others. I can see the lump has shrunk, and also the chemo is such a mountain, it will be good to feel that I have climbed that one.
Managed to disgrace myself over the holidays in the cinema…all that naff music before the film starts. ‘Wind beneath my wings’ came on. It was not pretty!! Luckily I had my 3D glasses on, so don’t think the kids noticed!
Tracey
hi all im doing fine just getting very nervous now about the operation. Im such a baby when it comes to anything like this im over my fear of needles now . Had a proper good night out with the girls and my brother so feeling a little hungover today xx
Take care all hope you are all doing ok xx
Penny
Good on you Penny!