Newly diagnosed

Hi - I’ve been to breast clinic today and I’ve 2 abnormal areas in my breast and several suspicious nodes. I’ve had biopsies and another appointment booked for next week following the MDT. My consultant has informed me that the biopsies are just a formality and I’m looking a chemotherapy, mastectomy, more chemo and maybe some radiotherapy. It’s all a bit of shock and I’m just desperate to get started with treatment. We’ve got 2 girls - 5 and 7 and I’d a like to start to talk to them about it. I only noticed some changes to my breast shape last week and there was no obvious lump. I suppose I just wasn’t expecting it.
I’d welcome any thoughts from anyone in a similar situation.
Thanks x

Dear Tigger57

Welcome to the BCC forum. I am sure other members will soon be along to offer some support.

You could also give our helpline a call for practical information and emotional support. The opening times are 9-5 on weekdays and 10-2 on Saturdays. The number is 0808 800 6000.

You may also find our publication “Mummys lump” helpful when talking to young children. I have attached a link:

www2.breastcancercare.org.uk/publications/diagnosed-breast-cancer/mummys-lump-bcc164

Very best wishes

Janet

BCC Moderator

Hi Tigger77
I am now a year on since my diagnosis and have got through a therapeutic mammoplasty (lumpectomy with boob uplift), axillary node clearance, chemo and radio. Its hard but you will get through it. I am now 37and have a 4 year old boy and I told him from the start that I had a poorly boob and that the doctor had to chop the poorly out and then give me medicine that is soooo strong it will make my hair fall out. He took it all in his stride. Ask your BCN (breast care nurse) for a book called ‘Mummy’s Lump’. It is aimed at small children and I think I read it to him every night for two weeks, then he just stopped asking for it.
You will feel more in control once your treatment plan is sorted and the dark thoughts that I know you will be having will pass eventually. Just concentrate on yourself, look after you and your family as the rest of the world will still be there when your treatment has finished.
Good Luck
mandyj.xx

Hi Tiger77,
Sorry you have had to join us on this site, but everyone on her is a great support. I have had my surgery and am awaiting talk with onc for chemo. I have a step daughter that we have every other weekend, we have not told her yet, but i have heard the book mentioned in the previous post is very good for young children.
Think you will still be digesting what is happening at the moment, but once a more definate plan is in plan you can start on the road to getting better.
Take Care
Faye

Hi Tigger77,
I had my surgery on May 1st, my 3 daughters (aged 10, 8 and 5) already new that mummy had a ‘sore booby’ so we just told them that the doctors had to take the hurty bit away to make it feel better, I then explained to my older 2 that some of the cells in my breast had gone wrong so that was why they were being removed. They seemed happy enough with this explanation and we left it at that.
We have tonight told my older 2 that it is cancer, and after the tears and the question does that mean you are going die they were really good about it, lots of questions about what happens next, but we have reassured them that I am fine and will make a full recovery and explained about the radiotherapy, We have also told the girls schools what is happening in case they are upset or say anything aa school.
Good luck with whatever you do tell your children and also with your treatment. XX

I suppose it is a good idea to tell their teacher perhaps as well, in case they get upset at school or they hear something scary from one of their friends.

Bless you, and all the very best with your treatments. I applaud all of you younger mums who have all this to cope with and a young family as well to look after! xxx

Hi - thanks for all of your replies.
We told the girls. Our youngest was pretty unphased - more excited about the fact that someone had drawn on my boob! Our oldest was full of questions and was scared as she thought all people with cancer ‘die’
We have been really open with them and I’ve ordered the ‘Mummy’s lump’ booklet.
We have been into school and they are very supportive.
I feel a bit better today - I am not as sore and I’m working hard on telling myself that everyone ache and pain I am now noticing is not secondaries!
I can’t wait to get a treatment plan sorted and start getting on with something. The waiting is the worst.
Thanks again for the support.
xx

hi tigger, it’s difficult isn’t it. are you aware of a group on Facebook for younger women with BC where there are lots of ladies in a similar situation facing the same sort of issues. It’s a fab group and a great alternate source of info and experience - if you’re interested the link is facebook.com/ManchesterYoungerWomensBreastCancerNetwork?book

good luck with everything