Hi Linds13
Sorry you have to find yourself to this part of the forum - congratulations and commiserations in one fell swoop hey! I don't know too much about IVF but understand it is pretty tough going so there you are pregnant with a longed for baby and then you are hit towards the end with a bc diagnosis. It sounds like you couldn't script it but sadly it does happen and numbers are increasing.
It probably hasn't sunk in yet because you have been going through so much all at the same time. In answer to your question as to do you just cope well, from my own experience and reading on the forums, yes, you will be amazed at how you will cope BUT and this is a BIG BUT, we all do it in very different ways.
It will certainly help if you have an immediate support network of family and friends around you for sure. After that, there is support out there but it depends whether you want it ie post-natal groups to meet fellow new mums - it can be pretty isolating as a new mum at the best of times but even more so with a bc dx. This not only gets you out meeting other new mums, some of whom hopefully will become friends, but it also gets you away from bc for a short time as this time with your baby is precious and although it will be hard at times you will want to treasure this time you have with him and make sure this horrible disease does not take this from you. It will also be worthwhile speaking to your Health Visitor as they should be able to help with any other services or support that is available.
There is another forum, which is on a private facebook page, that is aimed at younger women and there are lots of ladies on there I believe who have been pregnant when dx, some having to have chemo whilst pregnant. I can't remember the exact name of the site so will find out and post it for you as you may want to check it out. I think you may get more support on the facebook site than this one to be honest as people tend to come here first and then migrate over. Try and look over previous posts on this forum too.
You say you have your first chemo on Wednesday - not obviously something you are looking forward to especially with your newborn but although chemo isn't nice, most people do get through it, some have few side effects, some have a much harder time on it. You will take strength from your baby to get through this but I think the best advice I can give and it is rather a cliche but its to try and take it 'one day at a time', break that down into bitesize chunks of just getting through a morning or even just the next hour and try just focusing on your little boy. I used to get frustrated with the hospital not answering my questions, their answer was always 'its complicated' but it is only now looking back that I realise maybe they were right in some respects by just dealing with me on a 'need to know that day' basis - does that make sense? As each chemo session went by, they would be more forthcoming in dealing with my questions. I think what I am trying to say is that your mind is working overtime and you can become overwhelmed and they want you to concentrate on getting through your chemo as best you can and in your case enjoy as much as you can being a new mum and snatch those precious moments away from the nasty jaws of cancer. Again, we are all different, some people want to be armed and informed with as much information as they possibly can but some just don't so each to their own.
I hope all goes as well as it can do with your treatment on Wednesday and hope you can keep us posted with how you and your little boy are getting on. With best wishes. Love xxx
