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Really had enough of the whole cancer rubbish!

21 REPLIES 21
powerjen
Member

Re: Really had enough of the whole cancer rubbish!

I can so relate to this having had so many friends and family affected by cancer, I hate the word, I nursed my dad last year until he died from lung cancer and I also lost my mother in law a few years before , I sometimes think I got bc because I was not eating well enough or that it was my punishment, stupid I know , I know rationally that it just happens even if there are no risk ffactors. To date I have had 9 friends / family affected

Ali_H
Member

Re: Really had enough of the whole cancer rubbish!

🙂 xx
Zuleika
Member

Re: Really had enough of the whole cancer rubbish!

And Ali H , actually your post, which I love. I started reading the posts backwards
Zuleika
Member

Re: Really had enough of the whole cancer rubbish!

Belinda, love your post and completely agree. Like you, I have no risk factors, but here we are. You should write a book, I just love your take on IT !!
all best wishes
Z
belinda
Member

Re: Really had enough of the whole cancer rubbish!

Thank you Ali_H. And well said!

cancer is just what it is, it doesn't target people, it doesn't come as a punishment, it isn't capable of planning or deviousness , it's not 'sent' and it isn't 'called', it's not karma or any of those daft other things. So true.

I've lost lots of friends after some of us built up a network of fellow stage 4 women. We used to meet after first finding each other here on the forums. I was diagnosed stage 4 from the beginning in my early 40's. Slim, non smoking, non drinking, I'd also been a breast feeding young Mum. I've been living with this for ten years. I have no secret, no special diet, my cancer cells don't know if I'm feeling 'positive' or 'fighting' them or even 'kicking ****' I've had some good responses to common treatments...and that's the only reason I'm still here.
spookymoo and others never apologise for a rant...if it's helpful anytime rant away. With Love..x
Guest user
Not applicable

Re: Really had enough of the whole cancer rubbish!

very well put Ali_H

cancer is just what it is, it doesn't target people, it doesn't come as a punishment, it isn't capable of planning or deviousness , it's not 'sent' and it isn't 'called', it's not karma or any of those daft other things


Hold that thought. Nobody deserves cancer, it just happens.
My story started with a diagnosis of a rare blood cancer and then caring for my father through several years of treatment for prostate cancer. The day after he died came the awful news for Mum -advanced ovarian cancer. Four months later it was me again with metastatic breast cancer. In a strange way we have got through all of this because we all had shared experiences of cancer, we could support one another in ways only someone who has been there themselves can.
spookymoo you will be the best support your mum in law could ask for because you will know exactly how it is for her. I wish you both well x
applestreet
Member

Re: Really had enough of the whole cancer rubbish!

Hi everyone..Ali..excellent post..echoes the conclusion I,ve come to exactley..I was of the opinion that it was something I had done to deserve BC but it,s just what it is..life..we get good things and we get cr*p..but we are still here and that,s the most important thing..

Ali_H
Member

Re: Really had enough of the whole cancer rubbish!

I don't know if this helps, but it helps me...I'm in a very similar situation with far too many close family dx with or lost to cancer, many far too young and too soon. I was dx last year, age 44, and have been through chemo, mx, rads... Anyway to get to the bit which helped! A close friend (with cancer) said that cancer is just what it is, it doesn't target people, it doesn't come as a punishment, it isn't capable of planning or deviousness , it's not 'sent' and it isn't 'called', it's not karma or any of those daft other things. It doesn't lessen the effects, the awfulness or the severity of having cancer and wasn't said with that in mind, but she did help me let go of some of the horror.
If I've upset anyone with that I'm sorry, it wasn't my intention xx
Cybele
Member

Re: Really had enough of the whole cancer rubbish!

BIG HUG, spookymoo, for you and your mum in law xxxx
This disease and its treatments are so horrible, and it must be particularly scary for her after watching you go through it, and now for you to be going through the whole thing again at one remove, when you're barely out of the woods yourself.
Makes you want to run outside and scream 'ENOUGH' at the heavens.
I'm in much the same frame of mind as you, after suffering horrible lung probs for the last six weeks after radiotherapy - CAT scan on Monday will hopefully show that it is the radiotherapy causing it, or maybe the chemo, and not the cancer coming back, but who knows?
Completely at the end of my tether with the whole thing. Thought I would have my life back by now.
This time last year Iwas swimming five miles a week, now I'm an emotionally traumatised physical wreck, amd it's not over yet.
Lols
Member

Re: Really had enough of the whole cancer rubbish!

Hi spooky moo, so very sorry, life is really shit sometimes. I imagine your mother in law will be scared after seeing you go through all the hard times you've had but she can at least take a positive that your getting there now I know that doesn't make it ok though.
i feel my boys are surrounded by ca as well, me and both grandfathers at mo. thinking of you all , you sound like a strong close family and I wish you all well sending loads positive vibes , and hugs. Xx
spookymoo
Member

Re: Really had enough of the whole cancer rubbish!

A big thank you to everyone for all your lovely comments, good wishes and positive vibes. We really seem to be getting all the good luck (not!!!!!!) in our house. Mum-in-law diagnosed Monday with IDC grade 2. Will be having a WLE and SNB within the next 3 weeks and they will confirm stage and receptor status then. She is absolutely terrified. She has seen what the treatment has done to me over the last year. I have had the stuffing well and truly knocked out of me and I was reasonably fight and healthy before I started. She is 69, overweight with heart condition, arthritis and borderline diabetes. I don't know how she is going to cope. Hubby is in pieces. Just thought we were out of the woods with me one year on and now this. Talk about lightning never striking in the same place twice and things coming in three's. This makes 4 cancer diagnosises in the last 10 years in our families. With our luck we really should do the lottery or something! Sometimes things really do suck!
Trisha_51
Member

Re: Really had enough of the whole cancer rubbish!

You have every reason to have a mega rant Emma, life really is rubbish for you and your family at the moment. Sending you all massive hugs, Pat xxx
Guest user
Not applicable

Re: Really had enough of the whole cancer rubbish!

Sending you a BIG HUG as I don't have the right words for you. Hang in there kido.
Andie xx
Melrose15
Member

Re: Really had enough of the whole cancer rubbish!

Big Hugs Emma. Rant away no one deserves to go through what you are. xxxx
orangecat
Member

Re: Really had enough of the whole cancer rubbish!

Sending you and your family a big hug xxxxxxxxxxxx

Guest user
Not applicable

Re: Really had enough of the whole cancer rubbish!

Big hugs to you too, Cancer seems to have taken over my life the past couple of years, lost my lovely Mum to it 2 years ago now i'm fighting it, it all seems so unfair, but we can kick it's butt! Hugs to your MIL too 🙂 xx
Amber_D
Member

Re: Really had enough of the whole cancer rubbish!

Sending you a massive hug xxx
Lols
Member

Re: Really had enough of the whole cancer rubbish!

Big hugs spooky moo, bit surrounded by cancer too. Life's b....dy crap sometimes, rant away youve earned it xx get some sunshine, hugs again x hope yr feeling bit better today x
cath4512
Member

Re: Really had enough of the whole cancer rubbish!

Aw Em, Im so sorry for you. Life bl**dy sucks sometimes. I also wonder what the hell I have done to deserve things that have happened in my life. Its hard not to think like that when you just get one thing after another thrown at you.

I know I cant say anything to make you feel better, but am here if you need a rant/chat anytime.

Sending big hugs
Cath xx
lottie63
Member

Re: Really had enough of the whole cancer rubbish!

Hi Spookymoo
Im so sorry you are having to go through all this pain, Its rubbish isnt it , I myself am 17 months from dx and now my sister in law has just been dx , so my poor daughter is all of a quiver just been to dr to see if she needs braca test waiting further instructions, every time i open the paper, put on the tv or go online its there CANCER , and its so depressing and scary , not a day passes where I dont have the thoughts in my head , BUT we are here and we are here to help each other along this dreadful journey, I have always been a half full kind of gal but I too have had many moments of dispair , My outlook on life is very different now I want to live for today and Kahren is right I try to focus on the good times and not let the bad take over but it is as said easier said than done at times,
I wish you and your family well I so hope all turns out well for you mil ! I often look up to the sky and say come on enough now give me a break please.... people must think im a loony as I normally do it when im out walking the dog enjoying life and wanting it to go on and on xx

Guest user
Not applicable

Re: Really had enough of the whole cancer rubbish!

Hi Spookymoo
Just had to send a hug. It seems to all come at once sometimes doesn't it? The other half must be worn out - worry is exhausting.
Hang on in there - you have so much to offer your mother-in-law right now.
Silver linings helped me through to this point so why not try looking for them? For me it improved some relationships, put work into perspective, I lost weight and started to look at the future differently - hadn't given it much thought until it became threatened.
This was a bad day - focus on the good ones - try to identify the likely lows and distract yourself (easier said than done).
All the best
Kahren
spookymoo
Member

Really had enough of the whole cancer rubbish!

I have had to watch my sister battle ovarian cancer at age 27 and watch my sister-in-law lose her battle with breast cancer at 42. I was diagnosed almost a year ago myself with IDC stage 2b Grade 3 (Frriday 13th) and after x 6 rounds of chemo and x6 operations am now finished "active treatment " although will be on hormone therapy for probably ever (I have just turned 44). And have found out today mum-in-law has had mammogram, Ultrasound and core biopsy today and been told to prepare herself for bad news (having been in similar position a year ago I know first hand that it is definitely not going to be good news) I have really had enough of all the cancer crap now. My hubbie has had enough too. Sometimes I wonder what the hell.did we do to deserve all this? How much crap do you want to throw at us? Sorry rant over. Just been a really bad day.