I had primary BC in 2006, and last mth got my mets diagnosis, in lung and hip bone. We have had a rocky marriage for most of our 37 yrs. Mostly due to his mood swings and depression which has at last been diagnosed, but isn’t being handled too well. Since my diagnosis, not only has he been unsupportive, he’s been positively nasty. Enoughs enough. I’ve got to think of me now. He causes my biggest upsets, along with financial worries. We’ve agreed to separate. But I feel annoyed at the thought of struggling to sort finances, etc, instead of living my life. He is useless and hasn’t done any of the things he said he would to support me. This gives me angry feelings. Is there support for people like me to move on when facing a terminal illness alone.
Oh imac
so sorry to hear about your new diagnosis firstly x
we always hear about great supporters but I think you are not in the minority. Behind closed doors women are struggling to get from one day to the next.
do you have a macmillan nurse or a Maggie’s centre near you?
I know that macmillan helpline isexexcellent as well if you need financial or benefits advice
wishing you all the best xx
sheena xx
Bless you, what a nightmare! I left my partner of 37 years last year oddly enough. Similar reasons to you! I hve to say I was glad he was out the way when I was diagnosed in April. couldn’t have done with him. lol We are still friends… ish but he drove me mad and i should have done it years ago. No wonder you are angry though. Is he willing/able to support you a bit financially? if not I am sure there are benefits you can claim. Dont imagine you’re in the mood to hunt any of this info but the admins in here will probably send you really helpful links. I hope you get some good treatment. There seems to be a lot of mets survivors in here… sending love and cyber support! Lorna x
Thanks ladies. Lorna, how bizarre! Yes, should have left mine yrs ago. Always forgave him because of the depression. But the penny has dropped. Who will look after me? Def not him! Sadly no financial support from him either, he’s retired on ill health grounds. He is on benefits and I will be soon when pay finishes. Got a Macmillan benefits advisor, and my physio is also a counsellor. The split can’t happen soon enough for me.
It’s been over a mth since my post on this. Been trying to work through my issues with husband. He’s being unsupportive and very difficult to live with. I need serious help with this. Will call the help line tomorrow, but any ideas were I can get practical help with housing etc would be useful. Thanks
Where do you live iMac? You need to try get sorted. I can’t even imagine what you’re going through on top of the BC. I left just in time! You need peace and positivity around you. I hope you have called the helpline for advice? Love Lorna x
I have tried to friend you. Not sure if done correctly though!
I will try to friend you …not sure how either! Ha x
Oops, didn’t see Ethals post sorry. Have you been given any advice yet? Hope you get sorted x