I'm just beyond worried now. I'm 44 and have two small children (8 and 5).
I discovered a lump in my right breast a year ago (yes, I know). I didn't go to the Doctors as I was a) worried and b) about to start a new contract (I run my own company; my husband is a stay-at-home Dad). However, as the year went on, the lump appeared to get smaller. I went to see the Doctor a week ago as I'm on Prozac and needed some more. I mentioned the lump at the same time. She examined me and said that whilst she was sure it was nothing, she was going to refer me to the breast clinic to be sure.
I got an appointment through a couple of days later - which is for Friday 3 May. I was cheered by the fact that it wasn't instant, feeling that I was sure if she was sure it was cancer it would be sooner. Now, as the day approaches, I'm getting more and more panicky.
Firstly, I'm the only wage earner. If it is cancer, I can't see how on earth I'm going to carry on supporting my family. I can 'not work' for 6 months - but after that, I have no idea. And I can't stop worrying about it. Secondly, my kids are SO young. I can't even think about what might happen ... and thirdly I cannot help but think that if it was cancer the lump would surely have got bigger (or stayed the same) and not got smaller? But perhaps that's all wishful thinking.
My mother had DCIS about 4 years ago and had a lumpectomy and radiotherapy. Apparently this doesn't affect my chances of it being cancer.
I'm being idotic. Mum keeps telling me not to worry about it until I need to. However, I just can't stop thinking about it. I feel so stupid for leaving it for a year. Serves me right i guess if it is bad news.