Great to hear you've finally finished Chemo yeayyy what a struggle you've been through, bet you feel very relieved.
I'm on Day 3 after my Mastectomy, and doing fine, feel sore in the side of my ribs, and some bruising has appeared, but not too painful and no need for painkillers, I can move my arm ok, but taking things easy. Going to see my nurse at the GP surgery in Wednesday for removal of the dressing.
I am finding it hard to come to terms with just having one breast, it looks very weird, and I feel a great sense of loss and only half a woman. When I look down I can see my stomach, which was covered by my boob before, very odd to have roll of fat instead of breast.
I have been wearing my sponge boob round pad in my tshirt vest just so I don't look lopsided and uneven. I still have some cleavage which is probably just fat lol, but hopefully will look ok when I wear a bra again, which will probably be in 2-3 weeks as I'm too sore at the moment.
I'm looking forward to a nice sunny weekend hopefully, and seeing my girl friends, I have receive some lovely bouquets of flowers and nice cards which has cheered me up, felt very fed and and emotional this week.
Hope everyone is doing well and getting through whatever treatment stages you are at, I have completely lost track, a quick update would be good!
KTF thanks for the update on the seroma, it seriously filled up on the way home. I have no bcn til next tuesday so hopefully i will be able to manage til then :-). I will certainly ask about the steroid as i cant carry on with the drain every other day and its pretty painful !
Hope everyone is having a good day.
morning, well its not raining here today!! yay...might go out and do something, make the most of it as forecast not looking good for all of next week
Audrey - really hope your skin has improved since your post, that sounds nasty
Lisa - woo hoo, last one done and dusted! BCC arranged a talk on reconstruction in my area which i attended, it was really helpful, keep an eye out on the main website, all the courses/talks are on there, I'm seeing my consultant on May 16th to discuss/ be referred for reconstruction, i know it won't happen until at least 12months after surgery, but BCN advised get the ball in motion as these things take time
Kym - I thought that about the gown, i could have just passed it on to the next Nov lady
Gail - good new about the lymph nodes, but what a nightmare about the lesion, and you're bound to worry, hope you get the MRI scan appoint quickly and have your mind put to rest
Lizzy -i'll be building my hours up over a couple of months, so by July should be back to my usual hours, I'm a bit concerned about my concentration, i find when i'm reading, i'll have read a paragraph then realise that it just hasn't gone in, so i'll have read it again, the book i've just finished kept jumping from different people perspective I found it so confusing.
Evening Primrose well these have definately helped with the flushes, I still get them but they're not so severe, i don't get as hot as i was, and i'm not waking up at night like i was either. i am still being disturbed a bit, but nothing like before, in fact i seem to feel cold a lot more, whether thats anything to do with them or its just that the weather has gone colder again i don't know
Right off to do something now, I need to book somewhere for a soon to be 7 year old birthday party, hope everyone has a lovely Easter weekend, and i hope Lisa and Kym don't suffer too much
Sorry have to be brief. Just got to bed! Linda ask ur bfn about steroid injection to help seroma. It worked for me. Kennalog I think it was called, my BS gave it to me.
Lisa yay on finishing chemo. Will talk to u about mx tomorrow.
Night all xx
Lisa thats fantastic, last chemo woop woop. You may have 3 weeks of SE's but hey - thats it no more 🙂 Well done for finishing your treatment and I know you have had some of the worst side effects any of us have so I hope this last time it all goes alot easier on your skin and taste buds.
Gail, Its good that you have got a date for your rads to start. I am just like you though and always want everything to start as soon as possible but I know they always seem to wait at least 3 - 4 weeks after each treatment we have. I hope everything goes okay with your MRI scan.
Kym, Im glad chemo 7 went well today and the cold cap is working for you. I too seem to have lost my eyelashes, I still have some remaining on the top but the bottom ones seem to have disappeared. I hope your SEs are minimal.
Audrey, Its nice to hear from you. Sorry to hear about your skin after rads. Good luck with seeing your boss etc with reference working. You are right about listening to your body, I keep thinking I am superwoman in my mind but my body certainly puts me right.. Have a great easter at your sons.
Paula, I hope you are recovering well after your surgery, make sure you take it easy.
Lizzy, thats great that you are back to work, I dont think I am going to be going back til late May and then on a phased return.
Its been 2 weeks now since my surgery and Ive been back twice in the last 3 days to have my seroma drained. To be honest I can feel it filling up already... Has anyone else had to have this done more than a couple of times.. I just dont know what to do to stop it happening. The BCN have said that this just happens and it will eventually stop but its so painful and hinders me doing the exercises.
Apart from this I am doing okay 🙂 , hope everyone else doing well.
I am posting a couple of links to a BCC information event and a publication about reconstruction which you may find helpful:
Just read back where Paula and Teresa both stated they cried on the way to theatre....Ive just cried my eyes out just reading that, its like I felt both of your pain for a moment.
I cried when I sat down to have my first chemo....so I know losing my breast is going to bring about an emotional day.
Hugs to everyone
How are we?
I can finally announce I HAVE FINISHED CHEMMMMMMMMMOOOOOOOOOOO.
Last dose today, now just 3 weeks of backache, knee pain, breathlessness, peeling hands, peeling feet, a bit more weight gain, no taste, minging mouth and lethargy beyond belief to deal with. All in a days work eh!
Does anyone have any good links to reconstruction and the different options that I can read?
Paula - I'm so pleased you're Mx went so well. Take it easy.
Kym - Good you have another one down. not long to go.
Well had my post chemo clinic review yesterday. Chemo appears to have shrunk the cancer but not enough to operate on yet, so I'm having rads first in the hope that this will do the trick.
My planning session is on 10 April and will start 4 weeks of treatment on 24 April. Seems a long way off just now but expect it will come round fast. Won't see the surgeon again till 4 weeks after that so doubt if I'll have Mx before July now.
Asked the surgeon what would happen if rads didn't work and he was a bit 'we'll cross that bridge when we come to it', but must have read my notes again while I was changing behind the curtain and remembered I'm ER+. So looks like I'm also likely to have monthly Zoladex injections and Tamoxifen, which might also shrink it. Onc wasn't about yesterday so waiting to find out if I'll have this at the same time or after rads.
CT scan to check the internal mammary lymph nodes turned out to be OK for this but has shown up a lesion on the liver. Surgeon thinks it's probably benign but have to have MRI to check it out now. Always seems to be something new to worry about whenever I see surgeon or onc, but trying not to think about it too much just now.
Audreytoo and Lizzy, so good to hear from you both, it's been very quiet on here! Audrey! Your skin sounds very sore and painful?! Ouch! I'm very fair skinned and burn easy - everyone always laughs at me on holiday when I'm wearing my factor 30 plus. So the rads will be fun. Not. I hope your skin heals soon. Hope your scan went well today.
Lizzy, It's great your now well enough to go back to work full time, altho I should imagine its pretty hard. Everyone always tells me that it takes a full year for your energy levels to return to normal.
Gill, I'm well impressed that you are already feeling the benefits of taking Evening Primrose!! Please keep us up to date! I'm gonna ask my Onc next time I see her if I can take it too. Anything to relieve these horrid hot flushes! I asked about the beds in chemo today, and apparently they are for the people who feel very sick whilst having chemo.
Paula, brilliant that you were in and out as a day patient and even better that you didn't have to have any drains either!!! Also great that it doesn't seem too painful and you've not had to take any painkillers. It's so good to hear all these positive stories as re having mxs. It helps take the fear of it all away (I'm so scared of operations and having anaesthetic). Think I will also be tearful on the day too, its hardly surprising. Keep doing those exercises because I'm sure they must help towards regaining a full recovery. Go easy on yourself for the next few days, you deserve it! You said you're having radiotherapy, but I'm sure you said a while back that you didn't have to have it? And how have you been managing with your diabetes? I hope you don't mind me asking x
Gill and Paula, also very reassuring to hear that stamina does eventually return a few weeks after last chemo. I huff and puff just walking the dog at a sedate pace these days. Feel ancient!! Hmm, as re rads, wonder what I'll end up wearing, lol. Wish you'd kept your nice purple gown, I could have borrowed it!
KTF, reflexology on your feet sounds lovely!! I have a massage every few weeks at the hospital. It's lovely, but not very relaxing as the lady who does it never stops talking, lol.
Chemo no 7 went really well today. And the cold cap was only uncomfortable for 5 minutes. All the nurses were lovely, and the chemo room was full to bursting, I've never seen it like that before! Our chemo unit is one big room with 2 beds along the top wall, the nurses desk along the side wall, all the chairs at the other end opposite the beds, and the nurse stations along the other wall. Apparently, the unit is being moved to next to the rads dept soon. At the mo, they are at opposite ends of the hospital to each other - miles away!
I've noticed this last couple of weeks how short and stubby my top row of eyelashes are, but there are still about 4 long lashes on either side. Bottom row is mega sparse. I showed my chemo nurse today, and she said the short stubby ones are new lashes and are unlikely to fall out now! But I never had no eyelashes on the top row, so it seems really odd! Not that I'm complaining!
Eyebrows are well on their way out tho!
Oh well, another 3 days or so, and those nasty SEs will be kicking in! Just in time for Easter weekend. I feel bad for the kids because it also hit last Xmas too. I keep trying to be positive and think its mind over matter, but unfortunately it really isn't! Those SEs are for real!!!
Gill, full time work was hard at first and I used to be shattered by about 4pm but it's slowly getting better as my energey levels are returning. I do find it hard to concentrate at times and my brain wanders a lot...must be chemo brain. I hope your return to work goes well and you have a good Easter break.
Audrey, I hope you have a good Easter and you get your energy levels back soon.
Take care ladies
Ihaven't posted for a while. Hope everyone is doing ok. I haven't had time to read all your posts, so I will just bring you up to date with where I am at. Will try and read all your posts soon.
I finished rads two weeks ago tomorrow. My skin is really suffering though. I have been given silicon dressings to put under my breast to keep the skin from touching. My skin under the breast is now peeling and looks red raw, it is also weeping. I was told by the BCN to lie on the bed and get some air to it for an hour during the day. I have been doing this. I also rang the radiotherapy nurse and I was told it is all normal to expect this. But if it is still sore and weeping next week to give them a ring. I have also had to take paracetemol at times for the itching and twinges that I have been having. I was told to use E45 cream every where else on my breast but not where the breast is covered by the dressing.
Going to the hospital today for a bone density scan and have had to fill in an osteoporosis questionnaire to take with me.
Tomorrow my boss, HR andmy union rep are coming to see me re the restructure that is going on in work and which job I will be assigned to when I go back.
I am still exhausted and can't do much or walk too far, but I try and do a bit more every day but I do have to listen to my body and have plenty of rest.
Tomorrow evening I am off to my son's for Easter so looking forward to that as they moved house last year and I haven't been to see them in their new home yet.
Hope you all have a Good Easter, and as I said before I will try and catch up on all the posts.
Paula - good to hear you came through surgery and are not feeling too bad, and heres another one who cried going under and when coming out of anaethetic (sp?)
Teresa - i'm taking my tam at night now, along with evening primrose caps, i'm only on day 3 of taking the ev prim caps, and really don't seem to be getting as many flushes.
Kym - i'll 2nd what was said amount stamina does improve as time goes by, i do still get really tired if i run up stairs but generally its a lot better than when i was on Chemo
The hospital i'm being treated at is Glan Clwyd, I think the cancer unit there is relativly new, maybe thats why they've got more beds, i think theres 3 bays all with 4 beds in them
Hope chemo goes ok today x
Amysmum - i was laughing at the thought of you being given an xl gown, i had a medium and that was big! I really think all units should have those gowns though, i would have hated to have had to lie there with a bit of tissue over one side, and the rooms were always cold. its just a bit of modesty, not much to ask.
Lizzy - how are you finding things back Full time? i start back 2 weeks today, this week is my last week of sick and next week is holiday, i'll only be p/t to begin with and build up my hours over a couple of months
well we have a grotty day here weather wise, its pouring with rain, so even if we get any snow it'll never stick
Paula. Just to say good to hear from you, glad you're doing well - I too cried before the op, once I was on my way to theatre. The anaesthetist was lovely, said he "gets a lot of that sort of thing on this list" so, obviously we're not the only ones!!
Great that you went straight home, too.
Lizzy I start tamox this week I think - have scrip, but not got it from chemist yet :S
Got to dash as reflexology lady here soon, must clean feet!
I had my Mastectomy yesterday morning, I was first in line for surgery at 8.30am and was on the ward at 11.00am, seen by doctor at 2.00pm, who said it had all gone very well and I was free to go home if I wanted to. I didn't to need to have any drains, it was a straightforward removal of right breast. I felt ok afterwards and had some lovely homestyle roasted vegetable hospital soup 🐵
The breast care nurse came to see me for a chat and gave me some sponge prothesis to put in my bra, although I doubt I will be wearing a bra for several days. My scar is horizontal from side to side with a large dressing strip over it, it feels tight and very flat, but think I've still got a slight cleavage.
Emotionally I feel a bit numb, don't think reality has kicked in yet, the pain isn't as bad as I thought it would be, and I haven't had to take any painkillers since the operation. My OH felt sick when he had dropped me off at the hospital and had to go to bed for a couple of hours, think he was worried for me and was relieved it all went ok.
When I was preparing for the operation my pulse went high, the doctor said it was anxiety and I cried a bit as well, the tears just came from nowhere, I needn't have worried though as the whole team were brilliant, they looked after me very well, and treated me like an individual. I've to return to see the surgeon in a couple of weeks for overview, although he was very pleased with how the operation had gone.
I can move my arm and shoulder ok - so far so good, feels a bit tender above where my breast was and a little stiff, and I will take care and do some mild exercises as per the little handbook. I think I will be able to shower ok.
Kym, sorry to hear about your chemo problems yesterday. Just to reassure you that the tiredness and weakness starts to go away after the last chemo, I can walk further than I could without feeling breathless and weak, nearly 5 weeks after last chemo and starting to feel less chemo'd.
Hi Herbi, don't worry too much about your operation next week, I know easier said than done, you will be fine, like the other ladies have said on here, it isn't as bad as you imagine.
My breast care nurse said in about 6 weeks times I will get an appointment to go for a prosthesis fitting, I have seen one, they feel like a real boob, kind of like an external implant to wear inside a bra pocket, not too bad at all, they come in their own box and cost about £150, althought we get them on the NHS. Talking of mastectomy bras, they are very expensive! I'm getting a couple with pockets fitted, costing £40 each! We can't get them on the NHS, can anybody recommend a pretty bra with pockets?
It's almost 4am and I'm not sure what I'm doing up at this ungodly hour, seem to be less tired these days!
I'm going to take things easy this week, the ironing mountain was all done at the weekend, and my pile of admin letters all done! Have some ready meals and going to use my new soup maker. My SSP runs out tomorrow, no income other than small private pension, going to see benefits adviser next week, hopefully will get ESA and mortgage paid until I return to work, which maybe beginning of July, after radiation therapy, unless I feel ok before then.
Think I'll go back to bed and get some more sleep.
Nite nite all
I'm finding that I am not coming on here very often now that I am back at work full time.
Paula, hope everything went well with the op today.
I am finding the Tamoxifen ok so far but keep having hot flushes and night sweats! My hair appears to be coming back but my eyebrows and eyelashes are still in hibernation!
take care ladies
Paula - Good to hear you're out of hibernation again, was starting to worry about you since you usually post so often. Hope everything went well for the op today.
Kym - Sorry you had your chemo postponed. It's so easy to forget all the tablets.
Trudi - I'm so impressed with your gym progress. It's so annoying the hair seems to grow more at the back/sides than on top just now. Hope you don't lose much more.
Teresa - Hope you get the cording sorted out soon.
Amysmum - Have a great trip to Las Vegas.
I didn't have a bed for chemo either, but was happy to have a chair anyway as I would just have been sitting up reading when I didn't have anyone to talk to. Only thing is the HSL adverts on daytime TV always remind me of the chemo chairs now.
Oh dear. It's been one of those days. Chemo no 7, and I was feeling very tearful. I don't know why, it's never bothered me before. It involved a lot of jiggling around, because OH needed to crack on and finish a job (plus, I'd rather he took a day off later on in the week and do something with son, whilst I'll prob be suffering side effects). MIL had offered to come with me yesterday, but I'd said no, I'd be ok on my own. But I changed my mind today, so she kindly cancelled arrangements she'd already made, so she could come with me. To cut a long story short, all was well and good, until the chemo nurse asked me if I'd taken my steroids . . . . . I'd completely forgotten all about those!! So, told me to take some as soon as I got home, and another lot at teatime. I have to go back again for chemo tomorrow instead. But as soon as I got home, I realised the nurse had forgotten to give me an extra strength Emend that she had said she was going to give me, as I had taken one today, but the other 2 you are given for days 2 and 3 are lower strength. So, off I went to hospital again! Jeesh. I'd foret my head if it was loose these days. 😞
Paula, i can understand you feeling the way you have been. I have a feeling you may not be the only one, as it has gone very quiet on here these days. I hope today went ok for you x
Trudi, I'm so envious that you are managing to get to the gym! Whilst I'm certainly no gym bunny, I get so out of breath and weary so easily these days, I can't imagine ever having the energy to do something like Zumba, or a good long walk ever again!
Amysmum, think I'll ask tomorrow about the beds, who they offer them too and if the cold cap machine could ever be wheeled over there, lol.
On the subject of luxury treatment...
I have got a velcro gown (although mine is a fetching beige and white stripe) for rads too. They gave it to me at the planning session (when they found the medium as the x-large they first found would have fallen off).
But my hospital only has 1 bed in the chemo day-unit and that is in a little side bay used for treatments (putting in PICC lines etc). Some of the chairs do recline, but the cold-cap chiller machines were never next to a reclining chair.
So I guess I am somewhere half-way up the pampered scale. It is amazing how the facilities/levels of care vary from hopsital to hospital.
My hospital are doing fund-raising to improve the chemo day room, so I wonder whether that will include a larger room and beds for all who want them.
Good to hear from you as well, glad you've almost finished chemo, seems a long time ago since we all started, what a roller coaster! I just needed some time out to recover from the last chemo, and the accumulation of all the others, felt completely knackered all the time, also needed to step back from everything about cancer, it was driving me nuts, the hair loss, the nails coming off, feeling weak and feeble like a very old lady, the constipation and trots (lol) think I got depressed as some days couldn't face getting out of bed for another boring day of watching day time TV and feeling so useless. At last, just as I'm starting to feel more like my old self, the surgeon beckons tomorrow morning, doubt I'll be needed any prune juice in the morning lol (sorry too much info) lol.
I haven't a clue where you're all up to with treatments etc, need to have a big catch up wilst recovering over the next few days.
Will sign off now, and go on auto pilot ready for the morning, will report back as soon as poss.
It literally doesn't take long to be zapped, only about 30 seconds! Setting up takes ab out 5 mins and travelling back and forwards takes hour and a half!
I might switch to taking the Tam in the evening, hopefully I can sleep through the grumpiness! lol
Gym going alright but legs still ache quite a bit, just nice to be doing something active again.
My hair is falling out in pacthes, not all over and its the longer stuff so I am assuming(hopefully) that this is hair that started to grow a few weeks back and has been hit by a couple of chemo's. I have quite a bit back and sides but look like a monk on top! Just want it to grow back now as was hoping to be hatless for my holiday in July but we will see.
Hey Paula! Great to see you back! I've been wondering where you were! A couple of times I had wondered whether or not to call you, but then thought you may have decided to walk away from the forum and wouldn't appreciate a blast from the almost past. I'm glad you're starting to feel better and a little more human now after your last chemo. It's no 7 for me tomorrow, do I'm hoping I will feel much more positive after that as my next will be my last, woohoo!!
Best wishes for tomorrow, I'll be thinking of you xx
Weme, best of luck with rads this week. I'd just check with someone tomorrow as re your weepy wound. Best to be sure! And Gill, yes, you're probably right and Lulu was zapped for 7 minutes at a time, not seconds. I did wonder! I'm very very fortunate that I'll have rads at the same hospital where I have chemo, and it's only about 10 minutes away. Some people have to do 100+ mile round trips!!
Linda, I don't know either as re your fluid retention. I'd also ring your BCN for advice. I notice too that you'll have a heck of a trek each day for rads. It's not just the time, but it's the fuel costs too!! and I wonder what would happen if there WAS an oil tanker strike?!
Oh great, so Tamoxifen can cause mood swings too, Trudi? Marvellous. Yet another dismal side effect 😞
Thank you Teresa, for being so kind about my pic. You're not close enough to see my wrinkles and double chin I seem to have acquired this last few weeks, lol. And no, my chemo chair doesn't recline either! Feeling quite hard done by, lol. Gill, which hospital are you being treated at? See, Teresa just got a piece of kitchen roll too!
Well, that seems to be the end of summer girls. Wrap up, snow's coming!
Thanks Teresa, I've to be at the hospital for 7.15am and they think I will be one of the first in theatre then back on ward, booked in as day procedure, but may have to stay a couple of days depending on how it goes.
Hi Trudi, yes would be nice to meet up for coffee when I'm recovered, hope you're doing well as well.
Counting the hours...
Linda the seroma draining doesn't hurt (due to the numbness round the scar area) so please don't be concerned about the needle. The amount of fluid build-up seems to be entirely un-related to activity levels. They tend to just drain it is it is very large and causing any discomfort, but as Gill said ring the BCN, they'll probably ask you to pop in and get it checked 🙂
Gill my sis-in-law takes them at night as she reckons less side-effects if you take them on a full stomach, and she eats her main meal at night. Don't know if that helps.
Glad Weme getting better - go you and good luck with rads on Tuesday. Not sure about wound - just check it isn't infected, maybe call BCNs and see what they think if you're not sure. I have now got my tatoos - the planning appt was amazing, I go there 3:45, there was no-one in the waiting room I went straight in, and was out before my husband even arrived to collect me! The ladies were lovely, but wasn't keen on the blue paper towel to cover me up! Our unit said use whatever cream I like as long as it is unperfumed! This is apparently the newest edict.
Thanks to those who asked after me! I am feeling OK (still tired) but the cording is terrible. More cords seem to be appearing in my arms every day. Not sure what else I can do other than my exercises, and go for manual lymphatic drainage (which I started last week).
Kym, you look truly lovely in your photo!
Paula big hugs, so glad to have you back on board and to know you are OK.Let us know how you get on with your Mx - it honestly isn't as bad as you think it's going to be, it's a relief too, but also a bit sad of course, but now I am getting used to it and have no immediate plans to rush into recon. I got very wrinkly on chemo too, esp the TAC. I think it is because it dries your skin out, I felt about 50 years older than I do now, even though I am missing a boob. I have a bit of rib pain too, I am at the GPs tomorrow so will mention it then. What time is your op Paula? Will say a little prayer for you.
Fancy having beds for chemo! Our chairs didn't even recline, did they Weme?
Lovely weekend, lush weather, girl friends came round yesterday for wine, nibbles, chat and we watched Bridesmaids! Laughed so much - it is definitely the best medicine
love to all
Trudi - I was told to take tam in the morning, but have decided to take at night, as i'd seen a few ladies were taking them then, only on day 3 and yesterday forgot until midday so as of today will take at night, I bought some primrose oil caps today, i looked in boots, thought they were a bit expensive so left them and then went to Asda, where they were cheaper @ £4 for 150 caps, or 3 for £10, I've bought 1 tub to see how I get on
Linda - sorry can't help with your fluid situation, i'd ring the bcn tomorrow for advise
I wanted to wish Paula good luck tomorrow with your mx, i'll be thinking of you.
Trudi, Ive started my Tam and decided to take mine when I go to bed at night, dont seem to be having mood swings at the moment, though if you ask my other half he will say Im always moody these days !
Gill, Im with the others , Ive had one chair to sit in when Ive had to have chemo and herceptin which has been up to 7 hours.. Bed, thats pure luxury 🙂
Weme, I hope your first Zapp goes well on tuesday.
Lulu, thats alot of travelling. I will be travelling about 80 miles each day for my daily zap once they start..
Amysmum, I hope you have a fantastic holiday. Las Vegas - fantastic.
I am about 11 days post surgery and anc .
One question - I seem to be getting quite a big build up of fluid around my scar under my armpit - Im assuming seroma ? Does this mean I am doing too much or not enough, and should I see the doctor or will it go of its own accord ? Really could do without another needle coming my way 😞
Hope everyone is doing okay on this sunday afternoon.
Paula - glad to see you are back on here, we were quite worried! Best of luck tomorrow for mx, I will be very happy to meet up if you would like for a chat once you recovered from op.
My onc advised evening primrose too and I hasve been taking it for a few weeks, I am certain it does reduce the effect of the hot flushes as they seem to be worse if I forget one. I gather it does take a couple of weeks to get into your system though.
Is it just me or has the Tam affected anyone with regards to mood swings. I take it in the morning and can be in a real grump by tea time. My OH is very bemused! lol
Thanks for the message Teresa,
I will try to go on auto pilot to get through it, mind over matter and all that!
How are you feeling after your operation, hope all is well?
Just a quickie to wish you good luck for tomorrow with the Mx, Paula. Please don't worry you will be OK. Go easy on yourself.
More replies tomorrow
Paula, good to hear from you, sorry you've had such a rubbish time, personally I can say surgery is not as bad as chemo, yes its emotional, but once you start feeling better you just continue to improve, unlike chemo you start to feel better then theres another dose of chemo, and start all over again. Good luck tomorrow, i'll be thinking of you, and yo've been missed on here xx
Kym and Weme - sorry to have been the cause of envy re the chemo bed lol... the pic of me in the cc i was on a bed, the machine was by the side of the bed, all the cc were next to beds.
Kym - the bag for the tubes (thats the word i was looking for lol) was too bulky to cover with clothes but it was only for a couple of days and its not like i went anywhere...
and i think what Lulu meant was that she'd travelled a total of 20 hours for all the rads, to be zapped for 7 mins each time?
Amysmum - i forgot to say, i was laughing about you doing that training session and thinking you were having a flush! I'm like that here, turn the heating off, open doors, take layers off and everyone else is shivering! haha
Peeping round the bedroom door and wondering what happened to the last month - a complete month since my very last Tax, and left me in the twilight zone.
I haven't posted on here, mainly because I've just not felt well enough, many problems after chemo that I am sure you have all been through at some time during the last few months. I just wanted to hide away and not think about cancer and chemo and try to be normal, but I couldn't as I have been so damned exhausted all the time, I got very fed up with myself.
I feel like I've been hibernating and woken up and Spring has arrived and another brand new month 🐵 I am starting to feel a bit better, although very tired, sickly full feeling hasn't really gone away yet, my nails have turned pale yellow and feel like they are stuck on and becoming loose, think they will be falling off over the next few days. My scalp has started to itch, I think my hair might be returning, but as I think it might be grey its hard to see new shoots. My face seems to have more wrinkles and creases and the OH kindly pointed out that I look like bags have appeared under my eyes, great! Hopefully some cucumber will sort that out.
There have been many pages since I was last on here, I haven't caught up with everybody yet, and if I have missed any important messages I apologise, I will try and catch up during the next few days.
I hope everybody is as well as can be expected, I guess many of you have finished chemo now, or will be very soon.
I've got my Mastectomy tomorrow morning, absolutely bricking it, but surely it can't be worse than going through chemo? I haven't a clue how I will feel afterwards, probably devastated and elated. I think the old me might be returning as I'm starting to worry, I can feel a little pain under my boob in the rib area, worried sick the cancer is returning as chemo has finished, just hope that the surgeon removes all the bad bits and the rads pick up anything else. I guess worrying about aches and pains is going to normal for us now.
Best wishes to all of you
I had the bag that the fluid was in in a cotton bag that I just tied to jeans, I think mine would have been too bulky to put inside jeans but if you tied it round your body you may be able to tie it high enough to hide under your top. It all depends how much you drain in the 24 hours before you leave hospital on whether you need to take the drain home anyway. Some people have it taken out before going home. I was told that if I wasn't happy going home with the drain the would keep me in hospital, given the choice, I opted for home!
I also have bed envy as we just had chairs for our chemo, there wasn't a bed in sight, the haven't got room for beds in our unit, the same goes for the cold cap as well so wasn't offered that either!
Amysmum, I hope you have a good time in LA, I am hoping to go to states and Canada later this year but I haven't made firm plans yet.
I hope everyone is enjoying their weekend, my first zapping is on Tuesday hopefully, I will ring the BCN on Monday and see what they think about weeping wound, it's only a tiny bit at the end and I'm not sure they would notice but I guess it's better to be safe than sorry.
Sorry, bitty posts. Weme, when you tied your bag to the loop in your jeans, (and Gill), did you wear the bag under or outside your clothes? Is it too bulky to wear underneath?
Amysmum and Weme, thanks for the seroma explanations. They don't sound so scary now.
Weme, I think too, that I'd mention your weeping wound to someone in the unit before your appointment. I don't know that its something to worry about, but it can't be good to zap an open wound.
Amysmum, have a fab time in Las Vegas! I've never been, but know its supposed to be fab!
Gill, thanks for putting my mind at rest as re the dangly tubey bits that you acquire after a mx! I hope I get some sort of bag too, but then, you seem to get the star treatment at your hospital! A purple gown for rads when most just get given a piece of kitchen roll lol! AND you got a BED when you had chemo? Blimey! I remember at chemo no. 5, when I felt so awful and just wanted to sleep, I spent 5 hours trying to get comfy in my chair and was staring at the beds wishing I could crawl into one! (would have been difficult wearing my cold cap tho! How could you sit in bed wearing your cold cap? In your pic, you were in a chair. Did you get both? Now I've got bed envy, lol).
You'll have to let us know how you get on with Evening Primrose for the hot flushes. Before I was diagnosed with BC, I used sage drops, and they were fantastic! But my Onc told me to stop taking them because she said they had plant oestrogen in them, which would feed my cancer. I keep thinking there MUST be something else out there . . .
Gail - thank you so much for the sponsor, i really appreciate it
Linda, thats fab news, really pleased 🙂
Amysmum - hope you have a good time in Las Vegas, should be a great trip, not fair about the insurance, but at least you'll have piece of mind that you'll be covered
Kym - don't woory about being sent home with the drains in, its ok really, I had a cloth bag which was tied around my waist so no loose pipes (or whatever they're called) to catch on anything, i think if i'd known beforehand that i'd be going home with them in, i'd have worried too
Weme, I think its best to tell unit about your problem before hand, they will see it anyway as your arm is up for the rads, what day do you start? maybe give them a ring on monday?
I had my herceptin on thursday and took my 1st tam on friday morning and was feeling a bit queasey all day, not sure which if either it was, hot flushes are as they've been all alone, sitting here sweating at the moment!! oh joy!
for those suffering with flushes, my onc told me on thurs to try evening primrose or Balch cohosh (from boots) i think i'll try eve prim 1st, see how i get on with it.
Lulu - hows the skin doing, i was thinking of you when i was putting cream on earlier (i know, weird lol) you said your back was sore? i was wondering how come? My skin is getting more sore and red, as i was advised it would
Christine - you'll find herceptin only, strange, i used to get a bed when on chemo, i only get a chair now lol.. its great
back to BG more T now
Speak soon xx
Linda that is fabulous news..... Christie and kym thanks.... Glad iv been able to help.... It is fantastic kboibg I don't need to travel to hosp every day... I worked out I travelled 20 hours for 7 minutes of zapping... Wow!!!!
Kym, seroma is the clear liquid that you get when you pop a blister. Your body produces it whenever it detects a wound to help you heal.
I came home with a drain and coped well (and I am pretty clumsy). I started with it draining into a big bottle. They gave me a shoulder bag to carry that around in. Then I got a little squeezy egg thing that had a clip like a visitor badge. The drain tube itself is held in place with a stitch, then it was coiled round on my ribs and stuck down with a huge bit s sticking plaster. There was no risk of me pulling it out.
For the ladies wondering about post-op bras, I would advise getting cheap non-wired ones in your usual size (or maybe one cup-size up) to start with. Then also get a couple of those extension things you can get for a bra that is too tight. I was a bit swollen under may arm-pit, so needed the extra inches round the back. Wearing the next size up didn't work, as the manufacturers seemed to think that my breasts had jumped a couple of inches apart (and they hadn't).
I have been on Tamoxifen for 3 weeks now. The hot flushes are cope-able with. I tend to get one about 10 minutes after getting into bed (whatever time that is) and I think that some others temd to follow slight exercise. The big downside of them is that I have no clue if a room is actually too hot - I was giving a training course in a very hot room, but it took me ages to twig that the trainees were suffering as much as me and to actually open the window.
I am struggling a bit with trying not to over-do things. I am feeling alot better, but my right breast/lymph nodes in arm-pit still seem to swell up if I do too much (and take a few days to subside). I suspect it is a bit of lymphodema, but as it doesn't affect my arm or hand, the physios don;t get very excited about it.
Well, off on hols on Tuesday. We are going to Las Vegas, where my Brother-in-law is getting married next Saturday. The travel insurance for me is pricey, of course (as I had to tick that I still had 2 lots of treatment going on - Tamoxifen and Rads when we get back), but I am looking forward to it. Amy is excited (and nearly paked) and my mother-in-law is worrying about taking walking sticks and eye-drops on the plane. Should all be good fun (with rads top look forward to on my return).
My rash has almost gone now and only gets itchy if it gets a bit warm or something rubs against it.
I have another different worry now, I'm meant to be starting my rads next week but last night the end of my wound appears to have bled or wept a bit in the night. Does anyone know if this is something I should worry about? I had my op 4 weeks ago and the rest of the wound is fine but the end under my armpit still had a bit of a scab on which fell off yesterday, I'm worried that they may delay my rads or should I just keep quiet about it?
Kim, seroma is where fluid builds up behind you wound if you don't have a drain in to take it away. It doesn't hurt or cause a problem unless it gets big then, if you have had your drain removed, they will draw it out with a syringe. I didn't have much problem with my drain, I put it in a bag and tied it to the loop in my jeans then it just came with me and left me hands free. I didn't have to worry about leaving it behind and getting it yanked out as it was always attached to me. I went to the shops and all with my drain in tow!
Linda, great news, hope your rads go well.
Best wishes to anyone I've missed.
Linda great news. I also so hope for a complete response, it really is the best outcome after chemo.
Weme, just a few SE's left, haven't passed the time of the "top up" yet, mean I'm still less than three weeks after last chemo. It's watery eyes, taste not right yet, legs sore when walking teeny bit up hill, but all OK really. I don't like the idea of drains either, I hope I don't rip them out LOL. A week wed is my MX, getting closer now.
The hot flushes are what I'm dreading on Tamoxifen! Mine are always much worse a few days after chemo, when I'm feeling at my worst, then they calm down a bit the last 10 days or so.
Linda, that is great news!!
Christine, best of luck re scan results on Tuesday. Are you starting to feel much better now, side effects wise, from your last chemo?
Weme, really pleased that your rash is starting to clear up. Is it still itchy?
Lisa, I hope your feet aren't toooo bad. I started getting a teeeny tiny bit of dry, peeling skin on one of my fingers, but its stopped now. I can't believe how your skin has reacted to the Tax!!
Lulu, well done on finishing all your treatment. And yes, I agree with Christine, you've been a Godsend on here with all your advice!
Can I ask - what exactly is a seroma? and I really don't like the idea of coming home from having my mx with drains hanging out. I'll be scared of catching them :-(((
Linda - that is terrific news, onwards and upwards!
I am nearly a week in on Tam, feeling ok, hot flushes got worse again but not as bad as the first two weeks after chemo. I have kinda accepted now that I might have to put up with them for the foreseable future.
A week down on rads too, going ok, stiff arm which I wasn't expecting as they told me that my arm wouldn't be affected! I wonder if it because my scar is still tight.
Good afternoon ladies,
Just an update , I saw my surgeon yesterday a week after my surgery and the good news is when he did my lumpectomy my tumour had completely regressed and there was nothing there but scar tissue, the 9 lymph nodes they removed were all clear. He said it was the best outcome we could have asked for so Im one happy lady.
I start my hercepin again on tuesday and apparently it will be 3-4 weeks before I start the rads.
Ill catch up again soon.
I hope everyone is well and if the sun is still out then enjoying the weather too.
Gill - Thanks for the PM. I've got it set up now.
Lulu - Congratulations on having your final zap. Thanks for the warning on the paper roll. I was so looking forward to my purple gown too.
Lulu/Gill - Hope your skin heals soon.
Weme - Glad your rash is clearing up now. Hope the headache clears up too. Can't believe you feel up to doing work yet.
Kym/Christine - The CT scan is to check for an enlarged internal mammary lymph node that was spotted when I had a scan pre-chemo. The radiologist had a look for it when I had the ultrasound yesterday, but couldn't find anything, although she did say it doesn't always show up.
Christine - Hope you get good news on the MRI. Is this for your lesion?
Kym - Loved the new pic. Can't believe you're nearly 50. I'd be fed up too missing a trip to New York then. My birthday's in May too but I don't think I'll be doing much celebrating either.
Lisa - Sorry you're still suffering so much. Hope it's a bit easier for your last dose.
I've also just started to think about post-mx bras. Picked up a couple of cheap sports bras just now as can't quite bring myself to have a proper fitting yet.
Just a quick note as I'm meant to be working. I had a drain in for 5 days after mx and they had to drain me once a few days later when they took the plaster off. I did have a bit of a seroma after that but it has all gone now.
My arm is much better today, rash is still very visible but it isn't hot and not quite so itchy today. still feeling very tired and got a headache which is one of the listed se of the ab - why is it that to cure one thing you've got to suffer with another?
Must go do some work. I hope you all have a good day and weekend, the weather has cooled here today and the sun has disappeared.
Kym loving your avater 🙂
Gail I had lots of fluid in my breast when DX back in Nov. When I saw the surgeon one week before last Tax (beginning of this month) he said he could still feel some, but when I had mammo and US after last Tax aa couple of weeks later they didn't say anything re fluids but said breast looks normal now. I have my MX on 11 April. What CT are you having? I had an MRI spine this week and am aslo back on Tue for results.
Lisa, good the read your skin seems better now.
Weme, no seromas anymore? I wonder how often they will have to drain me after MX, surgeon warned me a couple of times a week, but for how long? You're soon at the end of active treatment 🙂
KTF, how are you doing?
Lulu, last zapping today? Well done, you made it trough it all 🙂 and managed to stay so positive to all of us too.
Gill I'm having Herceptin too till Feb next year all being well. Next week I have the first time Herceptin without chemo and it'll be nice to just get this done quickly and i don't expect any SE's either to be honest.
Love to you all,
Christine xx (Dec Darling)
Hands peeling slightly again, no where near as bad as last time, feet still peeling from last episode - they haven't quite finished their stuff yet! loool
I just spent an hour writing a post, only for it to just disappear off my screen, ggrrr!! Can't remember what I said now, and it was all flowing so well.
Weme, great to hear your rash is starting to get better (heck, those ABs HAVE worked fast!) I can't believe you've only spent 2 afternoons in bed since dx - I spend about 3 days after every chemo in bed nearly all day, which I hate. Think I'm missing out on something exciting! I keep thinking, 'mind over matter, it's not gonna hit me this time', but it does, it floors me each time.
Filosofie, Gail and Lisa, I'm so glad you'll all still be having treatment (well, I'm not, but you know what I mean). Its reassuring knowing that I won't quite be on my own. I'm seeing my surgeon on May 8th to discuss the mx and auxilliary node clearance. I asked my Onc yesterday, and she said that its normally 4-6 weeks after last chemo that they do surgery. Then I'll be having 3 weeks of radiotherapy, so I reckon it'll be July-ish before I'm done.
And its great to know that others will still be sticking around too (Trudi, Gill, sorry, can't scroll back any further), so it won't be so lonely on here. Where's everyone else gone???
Gill, well done on finishing your rads!! Now you can try and get back to some sort of normality. Filosofie, over halfway there!
Lisa, that was a good question as re mx bras. I've made an appt with my BCN to discuss it. I know ladies have talked about it all on here before, giving plenty of advice, just wish I'd made notes of it all - it'd take days to trawl thru all these pages! I think I thought, oh, I'll cross that bridge when I get there - but more like, I was sticking my head in the sand. (Just can't get my head around softies and all the different sorts of prosthesis you can get). But the reality of it is getting ever closer now. I do remember you mentioning those bras from Peacocks before Gill. I didn't think we had one here in Preston, but apparently we did. Did being the operative word. Apparently it shut down about a month ago. Drat.
Trudi, well done for getting back to work, albeit part-time. I actually managed 2 days this week too, the first time since I started chemo, which is suprising, considering I felt so dreadful only a week ago! But I have a wall to design for a trade show in New York in May. I won't be able to go, but my sister and my friend, who is sharing the stand with me, are both going. There's lots to do before they go and it's only this week that I felt creative enough to start sorting something out, so need to get my skates on as have 2 chemos before then and all the s**t that that brings with it. They'll be flying out there on my 50th birthday. I'm fed up I can't go, and had briefly considered it as its between my last chemo and (hopefully) before my mx, but they are such long days and its hard work, so best not to.
Lulu, only one more rad to go!! and I'm so pleased that your mums mammogram was clear. Your family must be thoroughly sick of all this BC stuff. Like I said before, I hope none of you ever have to see inside another BC unit ever again!! (and the same goes for all of us ladies too!)
Good luck with your CT scan tomorrow Gail. Whats it for?
Lisa, I hope you start to feel better soon. Have your hands been any better or do they still peel?
I'm sorry if I've missed anybody out, I can only scroll so far back.
Nighty nighty, I'm off to bed.
Kym xxx (hope you noticed I've got rid of the llama, lol!)