Starting chemo in April 2012

[Guest user]

hi bunnies
the water tablets seem to be working and my legs have gone down a bit. I'm four days into tamoxifen and nothing to report on that front yet! Rads also fine and seem very straightforward in comparisson.
i too am considering my work options. I'm not going back to work til the new January term and I had a really good meeting with my head teacher last week who advised me not to come back too early as I will only set myself back and have to go off again. my job is very physical so fatigue will be a problem, thats why I'm giving myself so much time to get back to fitness. I would also like to consider going part time next year as my OH is retiring in the summer and it would be great to spend some proper time together doi g the stuff we want to do.
im going to try to do some constructive exercise in the form of dog walking today. hope this will help the fat ankles issue.
take care bunnies
vanns x

[southpool]

Morning Bunnies

Christine, like you I am never working full time again and have vowed that I will not work Fridays. So I am having a lovely line in with the radio & I pad. This time last week I couldn't drag myself out of bed after a hard week in work, today I am much better despite a very long week. We really do get better everyday & that has really cheered me this morning. So despite the Tamoxifen grumpiness I am full of beans & positive energy this morning.

Tamoxifen update: I am 9 days in & aches have subsided slightly, hot sweats are better than on chemo & night sweats not too bad, which is all good. The downside is the PMT feeling that washes over me occasionally, OH is singularly unimpressed at having his head bitten off for no apparent reason and it stresses me. But it is early days & I'm sure it will all be ok, I just keep thinking of all the good it is doing as my lump was 6/8 ER+.

Wendy I am glad the dodgy stomach is sorting itself out, boiled rice & rehydration sachets really are the magic combination aren't they. Looks like the weather will be good this weekend for Bestival so at least your daughter won't come home covered in mud. We are off to Festival Number 6 at Portmerion next weekend. We are staying in a hotel on site so I can nip back for a disco nap during the day, which I'm going to need if I'm going to be raving until 3am!

Pixie your portacath just sounds horrible & stressful. Hope you have complained about the shoddy way it was inserted. I know it doesn't make it better but it at least records the impact. Fingers crossed the physio helps.

Amba your cruise sounds lovely, particularly the on board hot tubs.

Still hair obsessed, mine is growing, it is White & sandy blonde, all different lengths & as random as my old hair, double crown, cow licks & low hairline all seem to remain. I am a way off my Annie Lennox look, but am inspired by Pixie. Susie is getting burnt the day before I go on my hols & I am commando from then on. I have a large birthmark & an extra brain on the back of my head hence my reluctance to go commando up until now. I haven't actually seen the back of my head as I don't want to shatter any illusions that I have a nice shaped head but OH & best friend assure me it is not a good look & I trust them.

Right hopping off to ring the garage as when I got to the station after work yesterday afternoon my car battery was dead probably because for the last 6 moths it's only been to the shops & hospital both of which are about 10 minutes away. Jump started it last night with OH, the combination of us both being clueless about cars & my tamoxifen rage was challenging to say the least! But the lovely station staff sorted it for us eventually.

Will spend the rest if the day in the hammock, listening to the waves with the sun on my face. Bliss.

Love & virtual hugs
S x

[Guest user]

Hi everyone,
Haven't posted for about a week I think. Serves me right for having to wade through 61 new posts. Life has been very busy between one thing or another.
Went to my niece's wedding last Thursday. I didn't wear the hat or the wig but went commando with a pair of dangly bright pink earrings! I haven't worn anything on my head since. My hair didn't fall out on Taxotere but thinned quite a bit. It's about 3/8 of an inch long but there is no sign of bald areas growing any hair 7 weeks after chemo. Only things I do have are muscle pain in my thighs and arms and the skin is peeling off my fingers. My lymphoedema has got worse and I am now having to wear a combined compression sleeve and glove. Bit of a nuisance.
I'm going back to work 4 weeks today on a phased return but to be honest I don't know if I'll manage to work full time again. Just now I'm considering dropping dpwn to 3 days a week after Xmas. sara - you've inspired me to carry on with this idea by telling us about your career changes! I would like more time with my grandsons. I've managed through my illness without the money so I know I can manage on a part time wage now.
My mum got her new kitchen in so that involved me carrying everything back into the kitchen for her so that she could put things away herself while I set about getting the house back to its usual and battering round the house with the hoover. Then her washing machine broke down and I had to take her for a new one and then she wanted some shopping. I didn't get home till 8 p.m. Could hardly walk by that time! And I've had to do her washing as well as mine all week! She says she doesn't know what they'll all do when I go back to work.
My younger grandson was 1 year old on Sunday and I ended up with all the family at my house as SIL wasn't well and none of us wanted to catch the lurgy. And so it has continued all week! I'm going back to work for a rest!
sara - glad you're home now after your surgery. Here's to a good recovery. I didn't have any swelling in my limbs after surgery but did have a seratoma in my wound area both after Mx and recon and had to have them drained.
Gadget Gal - hope your results don't take too long and that they are good. Waiting for things like that drive you nuts psychologically.
Campo - congrats on finishing your treatment. I'm finding it's taking me ages to get over chemo with rotten SEs continuing.
sarabee - I've got hooked on GBBO. I love it! I've been going commando for a while now. Lost my nerve for a few weeks after my daughter told me I had a bald patch on top and went back to my wig and scarves but am OK with my scraggy look now.
pepihorse - I did my injections by myself and didn't find them too much hassle. I felt it would have been more hassle to have to wait for DN coming in to do them cos once I take it into my head to go out somewhere, I'm off!
vanns - sorry you're having such problems with fluid retention. It must be difficult when you're used to being active to be unable to do so. Mind you if they get you on the right dose of water tablets you'll be taking up running again!
pixie - glad to hear aboput Bertie and that you're keeping him. He sounds lovely. I've enjoyed my Golden Retriever so much while I've been off sick. I'd get another one but OH isn't being talked into it - yet! Hope your mum's leg is OK. It doesn't sound good. Could be an ulcer but whatever it is her dressing isn't going to do it much good!
Regards to everyone. Enjoying the spa. Every time I have my reflexology I'm on that hammock!
Christine xxx

[Guest user]

Pixie - I am so sorry to hear about your portacath problems. What a nightmare. I am thinking of you

I am gradually getting better. My throat is still sore - it's been weeks now. I have not been to the doctor again beacuse the only thing they can give is anti-biotics which do not help. I took a course of penicillin a couple of weeks ago but it had no effect. I think it's just going to be time that heals it. Unfortunately I am in a choir and the new term starts on Monday. I think it will be a while before I can sing!

As well as the sore throat my reconstructed breast aches all the time which is a drag. I have an MRI scan next Friday on both breasts to find out what is wrong with the once that was not lopped off, so maybe that will show why it still aches, 6 months after surgery.

Not much sign of hair yet (just a bit of pure white fluff!!) and no sign at all of eyelashes and eyebrows returning. I draw the eyebrows with a pencil but it's a bit of a challenge making both sides look the same! Anyone else have that problem?

We'll all get a bit better every day, especially with the help of Campo's spa.

Mary

[pepihorse]

Morning Bunnies, up early as daughter woke me, was actually having a lovely sleep, instead of sitting on the loo ! never mind, she was just saying goodbye as shes off to Bestival in the Isle of White till Monday, all these festivals they go to these days, makes me feel quite old....... all that energy !! Whats energy, these days??? Im sure she will be back next week and will sleep for her country, she usually does after a festival ! and gets so grumpy, oops that sounds more like me these days!!!
Well, stomach problems havent woken me up all night, so am hoping thats the end of them, Campos healing paws are working so far, with all the Immodium and the boiled rice extravaganza, with that mixture, heres hoping........
Im just aching all over so far, but thats normal with the Tax for me (and the hot sore feet/hands of course). I can just about put up with the aches and the tottering old lady gait. So maybe Im on the way back up again? Only 2 x more Filgrastin injections to go this week, and started the Cimco anti-biotics today (our hospital gives these out each chemo for 7 days as a norm, usually instead of the injections ( this time I got the injections as well because of the infection last time) Our hospital isnt very generous with these £200 injections, as Ive probably mentioned before, but got em this time !!!! yippee!! Budget cuts apparently, we are left to suffer first, injections after an infection!)
Does anyone else on here go to Norfolk University Hospital? and if so were you affected in anyway by their budget cuts?? its something to do with being a new hospital, and they are still paying for it highly, and are in trouble as it is costing so much, or so I was told. Hence the budget cuts in place.
Well, have a good day Bunnies, I am thinking, more bolied rice in a moment...... yummy..... as I think Im hungry again, weighed myself and have lost 8lb, so thats fortunate, I suppose, mind you I think I would have rather kept the 8lb and dieted later on than feel like I have !!
When has the weight piled on for you (who it has) through chemo, I now weigh actually less than at the beginning, but only because of the 8lb, otherwise I would be the same. Does it pile on afterwards??? if so I had better watch it as Im already a size 16 (I am 5'7") so hide it well usually, bit of a floppy belly these days due to lack of excercise, normally do about an hours dog walking each day, but lately been getting daughter/friend to do it, as no energy (and sore feet!) so am looking forward to the day when I feel right enough to re-start ! (not yet me thinks!)
Good luck with those having Rads, not sure if Im going to my assessment / scan tomorrow, will depend on rest of today, so I will see how the loo trips fare out first !!
Have a good day Bunnies,
Its so nice chatting to you all on here, I even feel like coming to this Bunnyfest !! it would be lovely to actually meet in the flesh ! but suppose I left it too late to join you all.
Wendy xxx

[pepihorse]

Thank you for your good wishes evryone, had more loo visits this afternoon and evening, this isn t funny! I am sure I have the impression of a loo seat firmly embedded on my bottom! Took another Immodium this evening, and has been ok for an hour so far! If it doent subside by tomorrow, I will ring the chemo unit, I just dont fancy the trip to hospital again to be honest, if they keep me in again I will go mad.
Im hoping Campos healing paws and medicines are going to work....... I have a pre-assessment scan for Rads on Friday early morning, probably have to cancel that yet again, unless I can get some adult sized Pampers!!! or if by remarkable healing paws, oh and yes I do have stomach cramps, twisting little buggers they are too !My temperatre isnt really very high, was 37 this morning, usually about 36.5 so up slightly, but not dangerously. Hoping I will feel better tomorrow!
Thanks Pixie, yes been having sort of Dyrolites, got the Boots rehydration powders, so same sort of thing, now gone through 2 x boxes of them already ! thats 10 sachets! lol! run out now!! got to get more!!!
I had small portion of plain boiled rice, with 2 small squares of boiled chicken a chopped mushroom and 2 squares of butternut squash for tea, very unappetizing, but thought it sounded like the right sort of thing to eat, as Im bl**dy starving! so far its still noisily gurgling around inside me, lets hope it stays there for a couple of days at least!
Sorry to hear about Portacath problems Pixie, sounds horrendous ! I had better shut up about my loo trips, as Im obvously not as bad off as some of you are,
Glad everyones holidays were good , lucky lot! I will have one one day !
Got signed off work for a month now, fed up with the struggle to get back after 2 weeks from the chemo, after infection from last chemo, I never got back and decided not to bother this time either, so SSP now for another month, Im now realising why I went to work ! Doesnt the money go quickly when its not popped into your account each month !! Im having to start using my savings!! (and that hurts!)
Goodnight Bunnies,
Have a lovely day tomorrow...
Wendy xxx

[ambarose]

Hi Bunnies,
I am back from my cruise and it was lovely, lovely, lovely. However, I have to say that I was surrounded by people much older than me(I'm 57) and OH was 60 on the cruise.(reason we went cos i booked this in january 2012 BC(before cancer) I loved it and had numerous interesting chats to people who are really up for enjoying the years they have left regardless of their disablities/illnesses so thats what we all have to do. I went to their spa-not a patch on Spa del campo- there were no punka wallahs and no hammocks, only beds and it was on deck 2 so no daylight either! However, there was an aromatherapy hamman which is just like a sauna but not too hot and that was nice and there was a really hot sauna which I could not cope with and a deep pool with hydro jets and shoulder massage jets so that was interesting. the best thing of all was outside hot tubs which I was determined to go in. Well the weather round the route-around the UK was awful for 4 days. Scotland was a blur of fog, rain, gales and wind and the hot tubs were forbidden incase one got washed overboard. Then once we got back down the Irish Sea to lands End the weather got hot and sunny and the tubs were open. I was in there like a rabbit up a drainpipe. I was the only one basking in the hot water, sunshine and bubbles. It was bliss! Small pleasures are the best are't they.
Well enough of me, I have read all the posts and send big hugs to all who are suffering and still waiting for chemo to end.
With love
Sarah

[pesteringpixie]

Evening bunnies

Had a day of hospitals. Firstly had my rads. Then went for ultrasound scan on jugular and portacath one site. Then saw head onc and then 25 mile drive to another hospital for Dexa bone scan....

Good news is i have bone density of woman half my age so thank you variety of dogs for making me walk miles every day for last 40 years, weight bearing works.

Bad news..... Yes bunnies we are back to portacath perils..... Wound where portacath one removed still oozes. Rope in my jugular is worse than ever and my shoulder and upper arm are very painful now and i have restricted movement. Today onc apologised and said he has never known anything as bad as this. Scar tissue in the jugular and wound site is now so bad it is causing furring. This means the scar tissue is spreading through ancilliary veins and causing muscles in shoulder and arm to contract and spasm. So.... Another lot of surgery is on the cards to remove blocked section of jugular and replace it a section of a less important vein from my leg. Onc had hoped that once i was clear of chemo, my body would make itself better. It hasn't. So, action plan is, he has made an emergency referral for me to have daily physiotherapy to see if that can halt the furring and sort the muscle spasms, and am also being referred to see a vascular surgeon.

So from Monday, not only do I have daily rads, I have daily physio...... And am now back to working much more and diary getting busy......


Bugger, bugger, bugger.

Rachel, my last chemo was 18th july. Nothing seemed to happen with my hair until about 2 weeks ago and then it just really started spurting and now my scalp is covered.... Very very short, but covered. Yours will come soon...

Wendy, sorry you are so poorly. Keep up your fluids, have you tried diloryte? It contains the essential salts and sugars lost with diarrhoea and will stop you dehydrating. Last one bunny, just keep telling yourself that.

7 rads down, 13 to go.......

Life is sweeter but am very weary of this portacath nightmare, it never seems to end.... Off to the spa for a cuddle and to curl up.

Much love to all

Pixie x

[Guest user]

Hello Bunnies

RachelP - Dont worry your hair will start to grow in again once you have finished your chemo - albeit will be like a baby's soft hair and then eventually the real stuff starts to grow through. Mine is slowly but surely getting there. I will be so happy the day I cannot see my scalp and I dont have to wear hats (although I enjoy wearing them) but there are days I want to be fee. Something to look forward to - my hair appears to be darker than it was and I saw another lady whose hair is growing in and hers is also slightly darker - so it is a bit of a surprise package.

Pepihorse - so sorry to hear you are so poorly with the trots. Is it not worth calling the bc nurse to see if they can suggest something to help you especially if you are eating and it is immediately going through your system. Do you have cramps? Rushing over with healing paws & Herbal solution.

Little Chick - Congratulations on your last chemo! Glasses of Champagne ready to celebrate in the Hammock whilst watching Mama Mia - Sing as loud as you can - as the rest of us will be too!

Southpool - So proud of you in letting go of the work stress and listening to your body. A very chilled Verve is waiting for you beside your hammock, where the butler is waiting with your Lobster. You will also be expected to sing at the top of your voice along with the Mama Mia cast.

Pixie - Salute your statement "rather be a plump Pixie than a dead one" and you are so right in saying that life is fragile - grab it by the ankles or whatever and go for it. Skpton and Thirsk definitely on our list, can't find Leybourne in Yorkshire but in Kent is this the right one, if not where in Yorkshire is it? Don't worry if the MacMillan3 appear I shall hide or will they mind if this strange bunny bounces up to them shouting it is YOU, the MACMILLAN3!!!!!!!! What poultice are you using today and have you set fire to anything recently?????

To all Bunnies not mentioned - sending big hugs & kisses to all. As Pixie said we are all getting there slowly but surely we are all reaching that last final step of chemo & rads.

Hugs & kisses

Hilary xxxxxxxxxx PS Pixie OH found Leyburn, as he is originally from Yorkshire area - he should!

[Guest user]

Wendy, sorry I cross posted. Sorry to hear about your troubles. Keep an eye on your temp and def ring the chemo unit, you shouldn't be suffering that badly. Big hug.

[Guest user]

Well am sitting in 2nd waiting room in chemo unit. Have seen onc and he's happy for me to go ahead with my last treatment. Wow, kind of scared and pleased at the same time!

Vanns, like you I HAD a healthy diet and lifestyle before dx and since then I've eaten rubbish and have gone up to size 14. Had to get some new trousers cos I couldn't get mine to do up! I was getting really frustrated with not being able to do anything but counselling has reassured me that I am normal to feel like this and have to try and accept it. Our bodies have taken quite a beating and we have to let them recover, so don't be too hard on yourself. My belly is swoburn and upper arms, but legs ok so far. Maybe because I have a footstool and always sit with feet up, don't know but worth a try if you're not doing this already.

Southpool, I will be starting tamoxifen in 3 weeks so will be interesting to compare notes. Have joint & muscle pains already so wonder how much is due to tamoxifen and how much to post chemo effects? Our oh's have a lot to put up with don't they lol, read your post out to mine to get him prepared 🙂

Margie, have a great holiday, you deserve it!

Hilary, can I book a hammock and a glass of champagne please? Mamma Mia sounds great, you'll all need your earplugs when I join in with the songs lol!

1j thanks for saying hello, everyone is welcome here 🙂 good luck with your rads

Pixie, I have hair envy! Lucky you 🙂

RachelP, lots mugs edges where we live ( in the middle of a bog lol!) but can't say I've been bitten much. I eat a bit of marmite on toast every morning with brekkie and that is supposed to make you smell bad to them, so worth a try if you're a "love it" person 🙂

Sorry I can't scroll back to answer previous posts and memory like a sieve, so hello to everyone else and hopeyou are perky and enjoying the facilities at the campo spa 🙂

Xx

[pepihorse]

3 days of tax trots............ feel so week, staying in bed (and loo), had 2nd Filgrastin injection yesterday, doesnt seem to have made me feel any different, yet...... am I waiting for a nice surprise or not? want to feel better, so fed up with this............ taken 4 Immodiums since yesterday, eaten only 2 x banana sandwiches in 3 days, but still the trots as soon as I ate. This is ridiculous !
I know this was the last Tax, but I feel sure its the worst ! moan, groan, moan, groan......................
Wendy xxx

[Guest user]

Pixie,
Sorry to be a hair obsessive but I am so fed up with being bald. When did you have your last chemo? My hair was growing after numbers four and five but has fallen out after six. It feels like going backwards

[pesteringpixie]

Evening bunnies

Well, today i went to a business meeting without scarf or wig and after meeting one lady came to me and said your hair looks really great, just like a pixies, i would never be brave enough to go that short!

How about that....my hair looks as if it has been cut! About 1/4 inch all over, jet black and shiny! So hang in bunnies, it does come back.

Aw Vanns and Rachel, I have turned into the portliest pixie ever. Have gone from a size 10 to a 14. Completley skipped size 12. Now i know size 14 isn't huge but on my frame it is. Thing is, i have no interest in dieting at all. Am not eating junk but am eating really well... Tonight was a sausage casserole, lots of veggies and yorkshire pudding followed by raspberries and creme fraiche. I don't want skinny meals.... Nothing fits, not a pair of trousers i can fasten and letrozole piles on weight. But you know, i had rather be a plump pixie than a dead one. Life really is too blooming fragile to spend time fretting about getting back to a size 10. I am 53, a grandmother... And after all we have gone through, to launch into dieting now is just being mean to ourselves.

Southpool, good to hear you have started to be a bit gentler with yourself. I think the 'good enough' principle is a pretty healthy one.
Hilary, do check out Skipton, Leybourne and Thirsk. All traditionnal Dales small market towns that should tick your boxes. If you come across a whiff of Vicks and a purple Fiesta being driven at 20 miles an hour, hide, it's the McMillan 3!

Auntie Mary has now fastened a cushion onto seat of exercise bike as the saddle was making her sore in her fundamentals. She has found she can only cycle through Emmerdale up to the adverts as she gets puffed. Mother has fashioned herself a poultice holder from an elastic stocking and a length of cling film. She tells me she is using a poultice made of white bread soaked in almond oil, this gets put on her sore, covered with lint, wrapped with cling film and the elastic stocking over the top. Of course this means she is wearing trousers in this hot weather as 'her leg looks a bugger and she doesn't want folk staring.'

Sara, hope you doing okay bunny and feeling stronger every day. Hugs and waves to margie, mary, elaine, sameelee, sarabee, little chick, gaynor, teabelly, natalie and anyone i have missed. Life is getting sweeter for all of us.

Much love

Pixie xx

[Guest user]

Pixie, am glad to hear about Bertie, he sounds lovely.
Vanns, nice to see you back. Also nice not to be the only bunny that has put on too much weight and has swollen up.

I had a wle, 3cm tumour, no node involvement, and am having 23 rads to breast. Currently five down 18 to go, getting there....

I a definitely feeling the best I have done for months. More energy, more positive. I even did some real life yoga yesterday rather than Campo's yoga, and felt great for it.

Campo, I am still lying on the beach every day while the smiley face comes to visit. It really helps me relax.

Does anyone else have insects feeding on them more than usual? I am pretty sure they are regretting it, can'timagine my blood is doing them much good!! I have bites all over, even on my scalp!
Take care bunnies

[southpool]

Hi Bunnies

I am feeling very proud of myself today. The last couple of weeks I have been very busy in work doing the sort of stuff I love. In the past I would have burnt the candle at both ends to ensure that everything was spot on and wouldn't hand anything over until it was perfect. I tried that last week & crashed badly on Friday, so have learnt my lesson. Yesterday I worked a normal day, briefed my boss on what needed doing and handed over to her to worry about. She was delighted with my work even though it was nowhere near at the standard I would usually produce. This morning we tweaked it and I left the office at 2pm to have a rest this afternoon before we present to the exec tomorrow. It feels very good to have let go and not let it stress me, it is amazing what listening to your body can do!

Hilary do you think I could have a celebratory glass of Verve with my lobster & entertainment, that would hit the spot nicely.

Pixie well done on getting to keep Bertie he sounds like a real character. I hope your Mums leg is ok & it is nothing sinister that a poultice won't cure! Your post made me hanker for Blackpool illuminations I absolutely love them & haven't been for years, may have to have a day trip now!

Sara I love the fact that you moved from IT to running a shop, my best friend would love do the same thing and run a teashop. I will tell her about you. I found it very liberating leaving permanent corporate employment to become a consultant & our break travelling was just fabulous. I have never regretted blowing my redundancy money on a world tour. Hope you are still on the mend from surgery & your results are ok on Thursday.

Off to Campo's spa for some serious chilling.

Love & virtual hugs
S x

[Guest user]

Big M – How is your throat – did you go back to the Doctor?

Margietee – Hope you are having a wonderful holiday and if you are not reading this until you get back. Hope you had a wonderful holiday!!!!!!!!!

Libby12 – Hoping the rads treatment is not tiring you too much. I had a 3hr round trip most days but luckily for us there is a toll road which we use and it is very under used. (Road company is in financial trouble of course). The other route is either over the hills or windy country roads.

1J – Welcome to our Warren. Glad you have been enjoying our banter. Good luck with the rest of your treatment and keep those feathers and beak squeaky clean.

Vanns – Hang in there Bunny things will get better. I think you will be finding this harder as you are used to being so fit. Don’t be too hard on yourself either as once your treatment is over you will start to feel like you again and then you will be ready to sort things out. Just now your body is telling you what it wants to get you through this. Easy for me to say I know cause I know what it is like when things don’t fit but be kind to yourself.

Sara12 – Hoping that your swollen leg is not causing you too much discomfort. Sending you healing vibes that you will be more mobile soon.

Sameelee3 – Enjoy your time away from work and hope the midges did not bite too much around Loch Lomond. Have a lovely time as the scenery is beautiful.

Southpool - Hope the ses of Tamoxifen are getting less. Like you I have started to fix out my wardrobe – I am really looking forward to getting rid of the clothes that I have worn this summer. Don’t need the reminder!

Pixie – Glad to hear that Berti is staying. Hoping your Mum’s leg will be sorted soon. I have seen a number of older people with these sores and I know it is a case of keeping them clean and changing the dressings regularly.

Well the weather here at last has broken and we now have reasonable temperatures so now I can get out into the garden. So much work to do but slowly but surely. Even started to look into my wardrobe to see what needs cleaning etc. Time for a clear out and declutter. My underbuild (space under house) is an absolute nightmare – will need a skip to clear that out but that will be later in on the year because the mere thought of it makes me feel week.

Next week heading for the Yorkshire area to look at which town/village we would like to stay in. We have been searching the internet and looking at 100s of houses but first we need to decide which area we want to live in. Would be interested in your opinions as to where it is nice to live. I prefer somewhere where there are hills and of course plenty of walking areas for the dog. Nice restaurants/pubs and a nice shopping area/street.

Teabelly, Hyzenthlay, Narmar82, Kittqueen and Ambarose have not heard from you Bunnies for a while – hop up out of the warren and give us a wave please.

So back to the Spa. Hope you are all comfortable in your hammocks and sun loungers. Are the team looking after you? How was the lobster this afternoon and hope the vegetarian dish was a success. Wasn’t the ice cream desert devine? Anybody else need a massage? The dolphins are showing off again with their back flips and belly flops. If you need anything just let me know. Holding paws and stroking ears of all those bunnies feeling pants.
Later on today the librarian will be round later to see if any of you need to change your books/cds/games etc. In the early evening the London cast of the Mama Mia musical have agreed to perform for us at our outdoor theatre and after that dancing to Abba’s hits before dinner.
Enjoy Darling Bunnies.

Hugs & Kisses

Hilary xxxxxxxxxxxx

[Guest user]

Thank you! Looks as if I will have those rads as it seems many of you with similar syptoms are having them. I forgot to say I was triple neg. so I suppose take everything that is offered.
Pixie, hope mom is OK and the stories will keep coming.
To all of the bunnies suffering, best wishes from the June thread.
Lynn xx

[Guest user]

hi bunnikins
right, it seems I have turned into the incredible swollen woman. Iactually don't fit some of my clothes now although I'm not sure if its through all the rubbish I have been eating. unlike you healthy lot, I have eaten absolute c**p since starting chemo. I used to follow a super healthy diet and I ran a slimming group at school. now it's as much as I can do to hold myself backfrom a POT NOODLE !!!!!!! I know, worse than death I hear you saying. Anyway before my Rads today I went to chemo unit to be given more water tablets. let's see if the do the trick !
enjoys the sunshine outside the warren
vanns x

[pesteringpixie]

Hi Bunnies

Lots of posts to catch up on - 1J welcome, i am pleased you find our warren fun, we try to kep it upbeat and there are a few in here who are indeed very witty and bouncy - they know eho they are.

Okay big news.... Well big to me....Bertie is staying. How did i swing that one? Well today we had an early start as have been to the christening of 2 of my husbands grandchildren. Took the dogs with us and after the church, stopped at south weald country park to run the dogs and then back to the house for christening party. I mentioned to Jo, my step daughter and a big dog lover, we had a new rescue and she said oh bring the dogs into the garden. So we did. Bertie looks like a tatty mop, the scruffiest looking dog ever but he is also the friendliest dog ever. Everybody at rhe party adored Bertie as he gives you his PAw, sits to command, rolls over (all taught in rescue centre)..... Then I said to Jo that OH wants ro give him back as he thinks he is too big and too hairy.... OH immediately says, well, perhaps I can get used to him....... So Bertie is staying.

Vanns very interested in the studf your friends are doing.....and wished I had known you were in my back yard you could have met the menagerie! Once i get rads outa rhe way will start putting together business plan for the life coaching. I alfeady have a post grad in cognitive behavioutal therapy so am sure i can put that together with all the stuff I have learned in AA and set myself up. I have such a zest and excitement about life and can turn anything into something positive - even stinky cancer.

Margie have a wonderful holiday and time at the paralympics, i can't get my head around all this classification system and how rhey work out that having one leg is equal to having multiple sclerosis.... Then I wonder about the drug testing, how does that one work as many of the paralympic athletes must be on drugs because of their medical condition.... So i get preoccupied and the constant commercial breaks drive me loopy. If we are really inclusive, surely the BBC should have afforded the paralympics the same gravitas as the regular olympics?

Sara glad to hear you are well and taking it easy - you too Southpool.

Rads number 5 for me at 8.30 in the morning so lots of early starts. like you Elain, find the rads make me tired but find it quite a nice tired, nothing like the horrid dragging tiredness of chemo. Now i just have an hour on the sofa in the conservatory every afternoon.

Will get email to everyone this coming week about bunnyfeste but all now booked and confirmed, just one thing, our buffet lunch does not include drinks, so I asked about mineral water and they charge £5.50 for a litre bottle. alternatively we can have jugs of iced water for free. i went for the latter and then if anyone wants wine or anything, they can go to the bar and sort it themselves. Hope thats okay with everyone. Email taking me a bit of time.... You will see why when you get it!

Bit concerened about mother....... When she was down last she had a big plaster on her lower leg. She said she had a sore that wouldn't heal up. She showed it me and i am pretty sure it is a melanoma and asked her to go to doctor. Mother dismissed fhis and sqid she was putting ointment on it and it would 'be right'. You can't argue with her anyway, yesterday she fells me she went to doctor on Friday as sore on her leg keeps bleeding. Doctor has referred her to a dermatologist on 18 october. Mother not happy as she and auntie and Glenys and Madge are going to Blackpool on the 19th to see the illuminations and she doesn't want her leg all mukked up the day before. I ask if she would like to see the dermatologist sooner. Of course she would so I tell her she can ask the doctor for a private referral. I knew as soon as I said it...... Off she went about how life was before rhe NHS and if people pay ro go private that is pulling doctors out of the nhs and people should all get the same regardless of their bank balance...... It made me tingle. My family were real socialists, not lip service socialsists, my mother ran a soup kitchen during the miners strike in the 1980's, my grandfatehr was a Jarrow marcher....... So of course she won't go private..... Good for her. Do pray it isn't anything too sinsiter though, no doubt she has a poultice on it as I type.

George Gently tonight.... Love it!

Waves and smiles to anyone I haven't mentioned and 3 cheers for Hilary who has finished her Treatment 🙂

Much love

Pixie xx

[southpool]

Hi everyone

Lovely to see the warren very busy. Hope MarGie & Lee have lovely holidays, it is nice to have a break in between treatments. Vanns your break sounded good too, what a pity you couldn't catch up with Pixie when you were so near.

Sara& Vanns the swelling sounds horrible I hope it subsides soon and you can getting moving again. I know how fed up my swollen left leg makes me feel so it must be awful having it in whole legs.

This thread really does prove how different everyones diagnosis is and therefore how individualised our treatments are. It is really good to be able to share & compare notes.

I have had a very chilled weekend to compensate for my busy week. Mooched round town yesterday buying industrial strength suntan lotion for my hols and then met a friend for coffee. Also found a supplier of post mx swimwear so have bought a couple of lovely bikinis & swimsuit for hols (yet another shopping opportunity). Finished off with tea with OH at our favourite restaurant. Today I have sorted my wardrobe out & chucked out all the stuff that is no longer suitable for my post mx shape. Now my clothes aren't all squashed up & I have found some nice stuff I forgot about. Just need to pack it away for the charity shop.

Have now been taking tamoxifen for 4 days, my hips ache & I am very grumpy think OH is ready to kill me. But I can't decide if it just the chemo effects or the drugs so will be looking to compare notes as others start on them.

Pixie I hope you & OH are reconciled & Bertie is working out as planned.

Off now for my chicken roast dinner and to get ready for work tomorrow.
Love & virtual hugs
S x

[Sameelee3]

Other way round- HER negative ER positive 8/8
Whoops.

[Sameelee3]

`hi Everyone, just did a long post then scolled back to previous page and lost it all! This one will be shorter, so you can all breathe sighs of relief!
In terms of diagnosis etc- I was ER negative but HER positive 8/8. Had 4 nodes removed in SN biopsy and only one had tiny metastasis, so they didnt do a node clearance. Had an MX though, with expander fitted at same time, then an Oncotype DX test. The stats confirmed the oncs view that Chemo would indeed be a good idea for me. She also said originally that I would have rads as well ( belt and braces being her favourite phrase) but because I have very restricted movement in my BC side shoulder already, she thought that the Rads might cause too much damage to the soft tissue and restrict my shoulder even more. My surgeon seemed unconvinced about the need for rads, given the fact that I had a MX. As am post -menopausal, will have 5 years on Anastrazole.
That's me in summary. Not sure how useful it is to anyone, ( 1J ?) but it is interesting to see how different we all are, and how treatment varies.
Chilling today with papers and coffee, using up food in the fridge. Pretending I am in a TV show and have to create something delicious out of a couple of organic carrots, a turkey breast, some spring onions, a tub of raspberries and half a jar of pesto. No roast lunch today!
Elaine- try not to project too much about your girls leaving home- they will be texting, messaging, Facebooking, phoning, all the time! And you will have some precious "ME" time to be completely selfish.
Sorry to hear about the nasty swelling Vanns- must be really unpleasant and frustrating for you. Pixie, hope you and OH have made up. What is the verdict for Bertie? Good luck for your busy couple of weeks Margie. Enjoy the rest in France.
Am very glad not to be going back to work tomorrow- it's the first time for about 20 years that I have missed the first day of a new school term. And I can honestly say that I am not going to miss all the exam results analyis! They always say that the results are brilliant etc, then spend the next few days devising strategies for improving on them! It's never quite good enough.
We are off to spend a night in the Lake District then off to Loch Lomond area. Looking forward to long walks and stunning scenery.
Hope all the chemo/ RADs SE's lessen for everyone.. have decided not to take the hormone tablets till i get back from our trip....so am SE free for a few days. Hair growing slowly, strange mix of colours: fuzzy halo now.
Love to all, Lee xxx

[sara12]

Welcome 1J - glad you find the thread both amusing and helpful - we do too!

I'm assuming I'll have rads unless the surgeon changes her mind when I get my results on Thursday, which I doubt. Like pepihorse I'm triple negative and grade 3 so letrazole, herceptin, tamoxifen won't work for us. As there's a relatively high chance of recurrence in the first two years for TN (30-40%) I'll take anything that's going at the moment to prevent that.

Vanns, my lower legs and just above the knee joint are still really swollen so they are uncomfortable and it restricts full mobility of my knees. Also the muscles in the front of my thighs seem very weak at the moment. When I was in hospital and they were checking out whether the swelling was due to clots or heart failure before my op, one of the surgical registrars said that she had come across a couple of other people who had really swollen legs as a reaction to the chemo - so perhaps we're just the unlucky ones to get this se? My arms aren't swollen though - did get swelling in hand on op side but that's gone down now.

Over the past few weeks I've been interested to read that so many of you are considering life changes such as change of career etc. For those of you who are older, fyi the stats show that there are very many women of 50 + who have chosen to go self-employed and have made a success of it. At 52 I was made redundant from a corporate IT company and could have chosen to continue in that line of work but I'd had enough of the stress and didn't like the corporate politics so I had a complete change of career.

I bought a shop selling art materials and gifts and although it was a steep learning curve and hard work (and a lot lower income), I enjoyed it and never regretted stepping off the treadmill. I improved the turnover and sold it at a profit four years later and then trained to do weight management counselling which I did for a further five years and that was very rewarding - there are a lot of psychological reasons why some people find it so hard to lose weight and keep it off. I learned to live on a fraction of the income I had from IT and in any case I'm not really materialistic and can find plenty of things to do that don't involve money. I found that the hardest decision was taking the plunge to leave the 'security' of employment but once I had done, I wished I'd done it a lot earlier.... I had suffered a lot of stress in my last five years in the corporate world, which I'm sure didn't help my health. So I really hope that some of you will be able to make the changes you are considering if you are unhappy with your current situations.

Margie, hope you have a great two weeks and manage to pace yourself so that you can enjoy it all.

Well, my friend has gone home so I'm 'confined to quarters' for the time being, being unable to drive, or to walk very far, so that's the ideal excuse for vegetating on the sofa with the papers! Hope you all have a good day.

Sara x

[Guest user]

hi bunnies,
I had WLE and SNB which found "no obvious node involvement" ( their words ) my tumour was 1.5cm but as it was grade 3 ( very common in younger women) and hormone positive I was advised to have the whoLe lot, lumpectomy chemo rads tamoxifen. as we have found throughout, treatment varies from place to place and depends hugely on budgets but at the massive new teaching hospital in Birmingham formerly the Queen Elizabeth, radiotherapy in always given as a targeted treatment to the cancer site, whatever the type of cancer. not sure if this helps the debate. Alsosits worth asking Natalie what she was offered as she is beingretreated privately and therefore herdoctors are not restricted by budget and will not be influenced uneccassarily in treatment.
Pixie I wish I had known you were so close. I was discussing you with my friends that we were visiting as they have also just given up the London exec life to focus on real life not work ! it's interesting that you are thinking of life coaching as they are part of an organisation called "more to life". I don't know much about it but they think it has changed their lives. certainly seems so as they were work mad and now they spend their lives involved in charity projects, painting writing etc. would love you to meet them.
speak soon x
p.s. still stupidly swollen and my muscles kill if I try to do anything strenuous. e.g. sweep up or even type? is this normal. i would swear it was lymphedema if it wasn't in my legs and both arms

[Guest user]

Hi bunnies!
I'm a diamond chick from the june thread and have visited your welcoming burrow before. Hope you don't mind this invasion but occasionally read your thread as it is so much more fun than others! I noticed Big M had a similar problem to mine and have flown in to join this thread as I have a difficult desicion to make. My onc has given me the choice of having rads or not. Left mx, 3cm tumour, grade 3, no node involvement. This apparently puts me in a grey area. In her previous hospital 3cm tumours were not given rads, but in Cams. they are offered. I am undecided so reading your thread has allowed me to see lots of other people having the same problem and is helping.
Thank you for your help. Must go and smooth my feathers and polish my beak!
Hugs lynn xx

[libby12]

Hi Big M , and morning all, I had no node involvement but I am having 20 rads, the onc said because it was a grade three tumour, it was best to have rads as this would zap (his words) anything that could be lurking in the tumour site. I just have the rads in the breast area not under my arm. I never thought that rads could make me so tired, I come back after having them , and have a sleep I feel like an old woman. Have also started thinking about work, and when to go back, really dont like the job as its quite pressurised, the team are lovely but its just the job, I would love to do something else but not sure what, its also not that easy when you are 52 to change jobs plus the fact that I am the only breadwinner in the family of I have to be careful. One daughter is off to uni next year in London, and the other one wants to go off and travel, I get really upset when I think of them both going away, god knows what I will do then. I have never been alone . Anyhow re work, HR are coming for a chat in a couple of weeks to see when I am coming back, they also ask my doctor when he would see me fit for a return to work, all I know is that I am not ready yet, just couldn't cope with it all. I take off my hat to all of you who have worked through treatment.Campo well done for finishing , you have everything to look forward to now, and your OH is right the chances are very slim of anything returning, but I know how you and Southpool feel, I often have dark moments and worry about the bc returning, not sure I could cope with it all again. Anyhow I am not going to let it get to me and try and be positive. Little Chick I was told that I have a cyst in my other breast, but I was not to worry about it, as many women have these, the onc said that they were harmless so please don't worry. Not doing too much today, trying to save my energy to get through another week of rads, also the weather is awful here. Pop back later love to all Elainexxxx

[pepihorse]

Hi big M, I had 1 node affected, had chemo (all finished last Thursday!) got 3 weeks of Radiotherepy, I did have the choice, yes or no, he told me he would put me on the trial, if I wanted to, so I said, I have an hours journey each way, so if I went on the trial I may just get the one where I dont get it ! he said as I live so far away, he would make sure I go on the 50% where I do have it. So I agreed, as I didnt want all that driving and fuel costs for nothing!
I just hope that what he said goes ahead !! as had 5cm agressive tumour, triple negative (tumour hormone negative) so no after treatment with anything else. so I thought may as well have the rads to do any mopping up !
Take care,
Wendy x

[pesteringpixie]

I am having rads as had wle and snb rather than mx. They always give rads if you have had wle. I am node neg, stage 1, grade 2, 8/8 er+ and her2+.

so for a 1cm tumour with clear margins and neg nodes i still got the lot, chemo, rads, herceptin and letrozole..... Onc says my tiny cancer was cleared with surgery but all the rest is to prevent recurrence as being her2+, i am at high risk of a recurrence in first 2 years.

[Guest user]

Big M - This probably will not help as I am in Spain but only no 1 Lymph node was affected, but all 20 lymph nodes were removed & after Chemo I had 20 sessions of rads.

Hope you get your throat issue sorted soon.

Hugs & Kisses

Hilary xxxxxxxx

[margietee]

Hi everyone

In a rush now, but just wanted to do a quick post as I am not sure when I'll be able to do another one ... we are away for the next two weeks. The first week we are doing various things in the London area - down with one son, wife, grandson tomorrow, then at the paralympics on Monday and Tuesday, staying "down south" on Wednesday transferring from one hotel to another and then looking after our other two grandsons on Thursday, then on Friday we have the interrment of my mother's ashes in Hampshire before heading to the ferry at Portsmouth to go to our house in France for a week. Back home on September 16th ready to start rads on September 17th. Phew, a whirlwind!!!

Vanns, great to hear from you again. We have friends who live in an Ufford near Woodbridge - not sure if it is Upper or Lower (if both even exist!!!) Amazing. Pixie, I may pm their name to you in case you know them, but not tonight.

Big M - there seem to be so many different protocols in different hospital trusts. I have been told from the start that I would have to have rads. I had a small grade 2 tumour and had a lumpectomy. I had to have chemo because one of the four lymph nodes they removed for sampling had cancerous cells, but rads were always on the menu for me. 25 of them, which is what they've said from the start.

Teabelly - are you back from hols as yet????????

I've been knackered today. Went to Nottingham city centre today to pay a visit to John Lewis to buy a birthday present for oldest son. Walked from one end of the town centre to the other and my feet were killing me. When I had reflexology yesterday my therapist commented that my soles are swollen so it is not surprising they are painful what with swelling and peripheral neuropathy numbness. BUT i have to say overall I am better today than I was yesterday and was better yesterday than the day before, so little by little things are improving .....

sorry but I don't have time to answer anything else right now as OH is heading for bed and I want a cuddle before he goes to sleep!!! Cuddle is about it for now!!!!!! But very worthwhile ....

Sleep tight bunnies. I'll be keeping up to date with your postings as I'll be able to read, but may not be able to contribute.

Love to all. Keep gentle.

Margggggie xxxx

[Guest user]

No rads for me, one node looked sus but came back clear from path, possibly due to having had one chemo before surgery, also had some shrinkage on my tumour so that I had good clear margins with the mx. I'm er 8/8 so onc has gone with chemo & hormone therapy. haven't discussed what hormone therapy yet, but periods seem to have finally stopped.

On the subject of scans, has anyone else had any cysts show up? I apparently have cysts in my liver, other breast and my heart! Didn't even know that last one was possible, but onc told me that when I was asking about liver MRI results a couple of weeks ago. Nothing to worry about apparently, but of course you do anyway.

[southpool]

Hi Big M

I have had chemo, I had a lump in my lymph node that was 4cm, but no tumour in my breast. The tumour in my lymph was ER+ 6/8 so is assumed to be breast cancer and my bingo card collection of scans found no other cancer. I had a precautinary mx because i may have had a very small but aggressive tumour in my breast that wasn't showing on scans although the path didn't find anything other than lots of pre cancerous tissue. My case is unusual but does happen and is treated the same as if I had a breast lump hence the chemo & rads. It is also why I am unsuitable for any trials.

It is typical of me to have something strange!!
S x

[GMT]

Quick reply to Big M ,
I didn't have any node involvement but I think that im having rads as my tumour was large at 8cm .Every time my onc talks to me re different treatment he always mentions size of tumour as the reason why I'm having it. I'm not too good at asking questions so this might not be the reason!!

Gaynor xx

[Guest user]

Southpool - you have had chemo as well haven't you? You said you had no lump in your breast - what did you have? I should know but sorry I can't remember who has said what in previous posts

[southpool]

Hi Big M

The trial is for people who have had Mx & 3 or less lymph nodes involved. I would have been eligible for the trial 2 lymph nodes & 2 with micro mets, but because I didn't have a lump in my breast the Onc thought It wasn't suitable. We decided on rads because I am relatively young at 48 & the lump in my lymph node was assumed to be grade 3 so I have 2 of the other risk factors for reoccurrence. My Onc was really good & explained it all at length & the decision was ultimately mine. Hope that helps.

Sx

[Guest user]

hi, just a quick post to reply to Big M.

I havent been told about my lymph nodes yet, even before the fine needle test in my armpit. the consultant surgeon (in the very begginning) told me that they always finish up with radiotherapy to reduce the chances of re-occurrence. maybe it's Trust policy. They seem to have a few of those in my area, such as no immediate reconstruction if patient is due for radio therapy.

[Guest user]

i mean no rads for me not no chemo in third paragraph

[Guest user]

Margie - wanted to reassure you that I am not a bit miffed about not starting a new thread. It was genuinely just a suggestion and I have no problem with not doing it. The warren is a democracy!

For my sore throat and earaches - I did go to the doctor and he gave me anti-biotics (even though he and I both knew it was viral and therefore they would not work). I took them in desperation because it was so painful, but they have not worked. It feels like there are blisters or ulcers inside, half way down my neck where they cannot be seen when I open my mouth. It's been weeks now. I may go back to the GP at the end of the week if there is still no improvement.

Was just wondering - lots of you are having radiotherapy after the chemo so I have a question. I was told that if you had 4 or more cancerous lymph nodes you definitely have rads, but if you have 1,2 or 3 they do not give rads. There is a trial going on in which they are testing whether it is beneficial to give rads to people with 1,2 or 3 and if you are in that category (I had 3) they are inviting you to join the trial. They will give rads to a random 50% and no treatment to the other 50% and monitor everyone for a few years to see who is dead (or alive). I have decided not to join the trial and the oncs are ok with that - they said if the trial was not on, the norm would be no chemo for me so it's no problem to turn down the offer. What are your situations re numbers of cancerous lymph nodes? Are you bunnies having rads because you had 4 or more, or for another reason? Have others heard about this rule on who has rads and who does not?

Sorry for heavy questions!!

Looking at all the posts, loads of us still have multiple problems which is such a shame. Maybe it's right what one of you said about just how long it takes to get back to "normal". My onc said it would take a year to have the confidence that every new ache and pain is NOT more cancer. That year sounds like fun.

Weather lovely - am on my way into local hammock in my garden, though someone seems to have stolen my punkawallah (or hunkawallah!).

Bye

Mary xxxxxxx

[Guest user]

Morning Bunnies

Little Chick I am sure the farmer must of seen most things, however I do think you might have given him quite a turn!

Southpool - Do take care and don't overdo the work thing - you need to get better completely. If you are having dark thoughts I would also agree about counselling because if we keep worrying about this we will never get on with our lives. I had a moment also this week whilst walking the dog with OH regarding the fact if the bc comes back into the same breast and there are no lymph nodes to stop it going into the rest of the body. But as OH sensibly pointed out after being zapped by chemo & radiotherapy the chances are very very slim plus we are all going to be monitored very closely. Plus if I think this way I will never ever live life again. So time to party!
Vanns - Pleased to hear that you had a lovely break in Suffolk but sorry you have got more nasty ses. Sending healing waves to you. Take care.

Pixie - Hoping OH will start smiling again soon. Recognising the situation - OH & I went on a very nice long holiday in 2011 and when I returned I was asked to go back to work for a while so I did, but at the same time fell in love with Amber who was in the vet and promptly left 8 week old pup with OH whilst I was work. Don't think I have been fully forgiven yet! Sending reconciliation vibes to you and helping to unwind the ball of anxiety.

TODAY yes on a Saturday, was my last rad - Bunnies I'm finished with all treatments!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (apart from Letrozole, Calcium and follow ups) Its done, it's terminated, it's gone. I am a very very happy bunny and I hope all my bouncing around has not disturbed you too much. I cannot describe in words how I feel that there are no more regular visits for treatment. Life really now is getting back on track. So hang in there bunnies, there is definitely light at the end of the tunnel and you will all soon be there I know Pixie you have the longest but we will all be there to get you through this, because there is an end to it. It does exist there is life after bc!!!

Have a wonderful marevellous weekend and for those feeling pants I shall be around with all creams, oils, cold cloths, lemon drizzle cake, biscuits, ginger beer etc. etc. to get rid of those nasty ses. But remember there is a life after bc.

Big Hugs & many kisses

Hilary xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

[pesteringpixie]

Morning bunnies

Vanns, you were so close to where I live, about 10 miles away, we are in one of those chocolate boxes.

Bumpy here today.... Nothing to do with bc..... Told you all that back in april we took on a new rescue dog called Tilly. She has been quite hard work as had had a rotten time before coming to us and because of mt treatment, oh has had to do the bulk of the work with her. Anyway, Tilly has bonded with one of our JRs and the little one gets left out. So we decided to get another dog. Said we would get a small quiet female fr Paddy. Yesterday we drove 70 miles to see a rough coated JR. When we got there, he was a she and mnot a JR, but a JR Schnauzer cross. 12 months old and the sweetest nature. OH didn't care for him, It was love at first sight for me. So i type this with Bertie on my bed.

Just tokk oh a cup of tea and he has a face like thunder. Going on about how we had 2 lovely dogs and then i go intorescue mode and he now has 2 very anxious dogs, (bertie is the calmest dog ever but give him his due, tilly is very highly strung) he wants to send bertie back....... Says our life is consumed by bloody dogs, ( he never had a dog until he married me 3 years ago) and i am on pins and needles. Chemo was easy compared to this!

Much love to all, just needed to share this as am a ball of anxiety.......

Pixie xx

[Guest user]

hi bunnies,
im just back from a wonderful couple of days in Suffolk, staying with some friends. it was wonderful and we thoroughly enjoyed the break. we stayed just outside Woodbridge in a village called lower ufford. it was chocolate box beautiful. we aimed to do a bit of walking with the dog on the beach and across the water meadows but I have managed to get yet another stupid side effect. it have got massive water retention. I had it a bit after the last cycle of chemo but this time it is in ankles, knees hips elbows and fingers !! it makes movement quite painful and my legs are very sore. I'm so cross as my mind is saying get up and go.
anyway last weekend before startingraids and tamoxifen on Monday.
i missed some posts a few days ago so apologies pixie that I haven't sent my email to you. I will in the morning and southpool I will pm you but yes I'm coming to BF.
night all
vannsx

[southpool]

Evening bunnies

Campo I love the idea of Caribbean night can I jump on board, it is just what I need. OH is watching transfer deadline day on sky sports & much as I like football it is the stupidest programme ever!

Sara I am glad the operation went well & you have a friend staying, make sure you take it easy & do your exercises. I suffer from a swollen left leg which is due to bad circulation, but was made much worse when I aquaplaned into a granite step in Mexico & really hurt my shin. It was good that your surgeon was so thorough and checked for blood clots & you may find that the lovely White surgical stockings help with the swelling if it is a circulation problem.

Sarabee enjoy your break in Chicester, it should be lovely having some time away.

Little chick I also have a tendency to wander round with nothing on as we aren't overlooked, fortunately the window cleaner makes a lot of noise or he would have had an unfortunate eyeful on a couple of occasions!

I saw the onc on Wednesday afternoon and have started taking my Tamoxifen tablets. Rachel I only take Tamoxifen by themselves, but I was perimenopausal before my diagnosis & haven't had a period since chemo started. I don't need to go back for 6months now & will have an annual mammogram as follow up. We had a very long conversation about the follow up approach because my cancer didn't show on the mammogram, but I trust my onc and she explained in detail why it is the best follow up so I have accepted it. It is all very scary though and am having problems keeping the dark thoughts away so am going to talk to my bcn about counselling.

Have had a very busy week in work and have been doing some really interesting stuff which means I've now overdone it & am absolutely knackered. I am properly impatient and the tiredness is driving me nuts, I was hoping to work this morning but woke up so tired I could barely get out of bed let alone pull strategy documents together so just had to leave it & retire to the sofa. I am really looking forward to our holiday & just doing nothing but lie by the sea for 2 weeks, so hopefully I will have more energy before I start radiotheraphy.

Love & virtual hugs to all.
S x

[Guest user]

Ooh Hilary that sounds fun, I'm up for some of that 🙂

My mum rang before we were up this morning. I got up to answer the phone trying not to wake oh. Now I dont wear nightclothes and we don't have any neighbours close enough to see in the windows, so don't bother with closing the blinds this time of year. I was sitting on the sofa chatting away to my mum stark naked when a land rover drove into the yard with a trailer load of bullocks for the field. Lucky I had a blanket on the sofa from yesterday and just hid until he went! One of these days I'm going to give someone an eyeful 🙂

[Guest user]

Sarabee12 - Have a lovely weekend in Chichester with OH and hope he also feels refreshed after your break. So glad to hear that you have told work you are still not available – you are NO. 1 and they will just have to wait until you are ready.

GMT - Don’t you worry about being moany – we have all been there and unfortunately will do now & then. Only thing to say is that it will pass, the clouds will lift and you will see the sun again. This whole bc thing is just pants, pants, & pants! You hunker down in the nearest hammock & the team will be there to chase the clouds away.

Pepihorse – Before my injections each day (done at the medical centre) I was given a low dosage of paracetomol to take about 30 mins before – it worked. I noticed when I had forgotten to take it I could feel the pains in my joints but not horrendous (but everybody is different of course). So when I had forgotten to take the paracetomol before the injection I took some after and that stopped the discomfort. Good luck with the injections – practice on an orange as nurses do (or used to!) Hope you get some sleep.

RachelP – Letrozole is what I have been prescribed – and I would be the same as you voting for monthly injection instead of daily (I am post menstrual). Re stripping off in front of other males – as we are now so used to baring all – better be careful when we are out in a shop trying clothes on – we might confuse changing rooms with hospital rooms and walk out and give the rest of the shop heart attacks! When I have showered I usually tie my towel round my waist, as towel round chest feels uncomfortable. I often wonder through to the lounge when the curtains are open – usually not many people round us but it is holiday time just now and there are more people about – so far I don’t think I have caused anyone a shock – yet!

Libby12 –So glad that the Doc has put your mind at ease – it does make a difference when someone listens to you. I know the feeling of panicky - so glad the Spa helps during rads – it also does me chilling out with you bunnies in the hammocks and down beside the sea. I have also been feeling very tired after rads. Infact when I come out of rads I am very quiet going back in the car – just seem to be in another world of my own - difficult to describe. So you sleep girl.

Littlechick – Big Wave to you.

Sameelee3 – Ditto slow growing hair here – Expect to wake up with no more scalp showing – is it too much to ask?

Pixie – Sleep well bunny. Punkawallah standing over you if you get too hot but otherwise gentle breeze blowing over you from the sea and all you can hear are the waves. Forget everything.

BIG WAVES TO ALL BUNNIES – As it is Friday, we are out on the boat again and it is Calypso time Bunnies!!!!!!!!!!! On the boat we have a steel band entertaining us and we are serving traditional Caribbean cuisine with lots of fruit cocktails and Rum punches as we sail over the bluest of seas with the breeze brushing your ears. Cushions, hammocks, lots of shade are waiting - see you there bunnies. Enjoy!

Hugs & kisses to all Bunnies

Hilary xxxxxxxxxxx

[pesteringpixie]

Good morning bunnies

Read all your posts.

Sara pleased the op went well, take it easy now, the worse of it is all now over as your chemo is behind you.

Elaine, I am pleased you got to see a doctor, sometimes all we need is that reassurance.

Unable to respond to all posts individually, am just absolutely zapped out. I dom't know if it is a fall out of chemo but more likely it is that my body is just deluged and has had enough so is sending itself to sleep. Ampost chemo 6 weeks now on daily rads, letrozole and this week was my double whammy of herceptin and steroids. I just want to sleep all the time. Worrying as I have a lot of teaChing booked in as thought that once clear of chemo, I would be okay. Blooming se's.

So back to my hammock, to fall asleep to the gentle waves......

Much love

Pixie xx

[Sameelee3]

Morning all,
Good to see so many posts in the last day or so. Lots of love to you Sara after your op. glad you have someone to look after you for a while. Take it easy. Thanks for the lovely long post Hilary; you are a gem, and I will definitely be there for that beach walk. Rachel, think I agree with you that daily injections sound a bit unpleasant. It all depends on which drug is the most effective for your tumour , but if they have given you a choice, there can't be much in it, I am guessing. Take care with thAt gooGling. Sarabee, am also loving Great British Bake Off after my son told me to watCh. I love all cookery programmes too. Never been to Chichester, but I have heard it's a great place to retire to!
GMT, fully empathise with the treadmill feeling. Saw my onc yesterday to get first prescription of Arimidex, or Anastrazole. Also very worried about joint pains and hobbling about like an old woman for the next five years, after which I will be an old wOman. I have always felt and looked younger than my years, but am beginning to feel and look my age now! I spoke to someone yesterday who's been on the hormone tablets for about two weeks. Her fingers are swollen and painful already. I am hoping that any SE 's settle down after a while. And who knows, we might be lucky! Strongly recommend the book I mentioned in my last post. There is a useful chapter on hormone treatments in which the last thought is that cancer is a powerful enemy and that the hormone therapy is very effective, so we need to be as positive as possible.
Warm thoughts go to anyone feeling fed up, anxious, or in pain, at the moment. Hair growth disappointingly slow. Till a bald bunnie with delusions.
Much love
Lee
X

[pepihorse]

Thank you Gaynor and Gadget girl for your advise, hope these work as dont want to go back in hospital again ! I think I might still get my friend to do at least the first one, and see how it goes, they did show me in the Onc unit, by pushing it into a rubber ball, but thats not me! lol! I didnt want to have to wait for a district nurse to come as wanted to have them later on in the evening, as they said its best so you can possibly sleep off the pain !
More pain, have enough pain on TAX, about the only part of my body that never had pain is my back, that was fine, and now apparently I am going to have back pains too !!! great !!
Oh, well Tax truck awaiting, probably Sunday, then filgrastin pains, start inj Monday so then await them to add to it !
Oh I will be so glas when this is all over, well I expect you all do, must stop feeling so sorry for myself, when theres all of you going through same/similar to me. !!!
Last day of steroids today, so hopefully will sleep better in next couple of days, getting up ay 4 am doesnt suit me at all !
Thanks for info guys.....
Best wishes,
Wendy xx

[GMT]

Wendy re injections, I had 8 to take for the last 2 cycles. I went to GP surgery for nurse to show me how to do the first one and after that did them myself. I did mine in my stomach, feel a little uncomfortable as push in but doesn't hurt as such. For me, it took about 4 or 5 days for the pain from injections to kick in. Pains in back, hips and buttocks mainly, I took pain killers with codeine and these helped and it only lasted a couple of days. I know it feels like another thing to have to do but they kept everything on track.
Hope you get on ok with them.
Gaynor x

[sarabee2012]

Libby12 - hello as I missed you off my long post!! Didn't know we had so many bunnies now lol!
Sarabee xxx