Starting chemo in August 2012

[June22]

Jackster50, and everyone... I know exactly what you mean about feeling left hanging. After rads I felt quite alone as there were no more appointments to schedule my days, and no one to see to ask for answers. I think this is a normal feeling as there are many such reports about the feeling of 'abandonment' but I think it could be alleviated if there was a kind of 'wind down' session with a breast care specialist of some kind who could explain what happens next, and what you might experience as your body recovers. I guess they concentrate their efforts on the actual treatments and not on our feelings and emotions.

8 weeks after finishing rads I had an appointment with the radiotherapy/oncology unit to follow up my progress, and this was a kind of signing-off from treatments, but of course I stay on the monitoring radar. It was then that I mentioned my concerns about the small lump I had found as my breast had started to ache again. The Dr was very reassuring, said often the aches come and go for a while, but my concerns were acted on very quickly to bring me a phone call the following day from the Breast Nurses I had lost contact with (they had moved the breast clinic to a different hospital) and they arranged for me to get seen by my surgeon and get scanned the following week, rather than wait for the routine appointment for the surgeon sign-off and the 12 month mammogram. This brought my appointments forward by about a month.
I did feel a bit foolish worrying about a lump after so much chemo and rads - I knew it was unlikely to be another cancer, but still... your mind won't settle.
At no time was I made to feel foolish by the professionals; everyone who examined me reassured me that I was right to mention it, that sometimes these things can happen, and thought it was worth checking out further.
It was of course a relief to see the scans myself and understand what I was feeling as a lump, was indeed a lump - but not a tumour.

So for those who are still left hanging... I think it goes that you get a kind of follow up appointment to finalise your oncology/rads. (It may not be with your oncologist - I haven't seen mine since before my last chemo as the rads specialist then took over, but other hospitals may work differently. The rads specialist explained they are all oncologists.)
I think after that, you should get a follow up appointment with your surgeon, probably at the breast clinic. And you get your 12 month mammogram appointment. It may be that the mammogram results are sent to the surgeon before you get that appointment - I am not sure... but there does seem to be some kind of system going on to close our active treatments... it is just that we aren't informed that it is going on so we feel left without support!
If you are still receiving meds or treatments your experience will probably be different, but for me, I get no more tablets or infusions as mine was a TN cancer.
Now I need to get on with my life and keep monitoring myself for any lumps as anyone would normally. It is hard to get back into the swing of it... I still feel full of chemo, have a foul taste in my mouth, pins and needles in my hands, and aches in my limbs, and my mind isn't as sharp as it was.... but I am getting stronger.
I am grateful for having my life back.

I'm sorry I don't join in so often on this forum. It is people I met here that have kept me cheered and supported, but I find this forum structure frustrating to use. I know they are working hard to improve it.

MY chemo started the last day of August 2012, so I joined the September starters on here in a Facebook group (September Sapphires) where we were able to discuss things in private and share pictures and get to know each other aside of our cancers. It was a welcome support, and friends have been made, and a few of us have met in person.
THANK YOU to all who post here in support of each other. Sharing means others going through similar experiences feel less alone, even if they don't have the confidence or means to post messages themselves. I still try to use the BCC boards to share my own experience to support others.

Sorry for the long post! I hope some of it helps those who are left feeling - what happens next!
Enjoy your day everyone,
June22

[jackster50]

Crikey you two have been having a rather stressful time but thank god everything is fine. I thought because no one was writing comments that everyone was ok (of course you are) but you should share your worries as we are all here for you. I think my tablets are kicking in as Im feeling a good deal more positive. While I still think my hair looks like an over grown bird nest I do agree Mandy that it is quite liberating to wash and go :). I did buy micro hair straightners but they dont do anything really to tame the wired curls (maybe psychogically to me they look slightly straighter hehe).
I had my mastecomy in June last year so maybe my mammoram will come through next month. Its strange but my OH and I guess me were expecting to be told after treatment finished that heh, youre cancer free so go live your life but that didnt happen it just finished- just left hanging. Im looking forward but slightly scared also to having the mammogram. When I get told its clear then hopefully that will be the starting point to putting this all behind me.

Enjoy the sun xx

[mandyj]

Hi ladies
Had a rough time getting over all this treatment too. I don't think having multiple sclerosis helps!! Had backache since boxing day! They held off doing a bone scan as I thought it was ms symptoms and I was half way through rads at the time. by the time I saw them for the post rads review 6 weeks later I still had it, so, BONE SCAN Aagghh! Had it done and then went travelling around Europe for a month - fantastic! Got back from hols on Sunday (May Day bank hol) to find a letter saying 'Attend for a lumbar xray as there is something on the bone scan that they need more detail on'. Well the panic set in, the tears flooded and as it was bank hol I could not phone the onc. He finally called me back 3 days later!!! I hoped, as he had not rushed to call me, that all was ok. Thankfully he said it was not bone mets but they need to see what the problem is. I have had back trouble since I was 18 and 20 years in a nursing career has not done it any favours. It is getting better now but I managed to pull it on a rollercoaster ride at Disneyland Paris!
As for the hair, it is fifty shades of grey and I actuallty like it! I love not having to do much with it every day. I have kissed goodbye to the need for hair straighteners - hooray! Have my mammogram and onc appt for xray results on 3rd June so wish me luck.
Great news that you are coming through your first year checks fit and well. Lets keep in touch.
Luv mandyj.xx

[jaxmackenzie]

Well done June22............another positive (in a good way) result lets hope we hear some more xx

[June22]

Hi everyone,
Jackster50, I had a mammogram and an US today because I found a new lump next to my scar. GOOD NEWS is that it isn't a new tumour.
I was due my 12 month mammogram next month, but they brought if forward because of this lump, to give me peace of mind sooner. They thought it most unlikely to be a tumour, considering I had clear margins, no lymph spread, and have been soaked in chemo and zapped with radiotherapy... but just in case, as mine was a fast growing TN type.

Todays examinations gave me the all clear, as much as they can. It is such a relief. The lump seems to be a calcification and scar tissue, a result of the lumpectomy. No idea why my breast started to ache and nipple itch, but it could still be healing from the Rads. My Lymph glands became tender too.

But, I'm just going to try and forget about it all for a bit and wallow in the 'no sign of a tumour' moment. They also said I could have an open appointment and contact them at any time if I felt a change that concerned me further, so I feel secure to have such a good team available to me.
For me, a good day today. So nice to share good news.

June 22

[jackster50]

Great news 🙂 Break out the bubbly! Like June says 6 months will soon fly by and you can enjoy life as a lady of leisure ;). June why are you having an ultrasound?

[June22]

Jaxmackenzie, that is wonderful news to share with us. We don't share the good stuff often enough 🙂
The next 6 months will fly by, and then you can enjoy a little more leisure time.

I have an utrasound tomorrow... fingers crossed it is as good a result as yours.

June22

[jaxmackenzie]

Hi Ladies...........had a call this afternoon from oncologist...........mammogram result all clear.............woohoo...........now I can look forward to my final six months at work, then semi-retirement in December at 51...... I hope you all have good results too when it's your turn xx

[June22]

Jackster50, I sypathise. I still ache in my limbs, and some things still taste odd. I've had little energy, but I am getting stronger. I just managed a weekend of slow,plodding gardening which would have been beyond me a month ago.
Depression is there too, kind of expected after all we have been through and then suddenly facing getting back to our previous lives on our own. It isn't easy to adjust, but we will find a new normal, and find our place again.

I haven't been able to return to work either, just been too weak and lacking in stamina and confidence, but I do think some of us need longer than others to recover from the chemo. The Oncologist at my follow up appointment said it can take many, many months for some people to feel clear of the chemo 😞
My hair is growing faster on the top than at the sides, and is still that soft mousey-coloured baby fluff. It is straight though. (I was hoping for a bit of wave as I've always had straight hair! But I decided to accept with gratitude whatever grew back. My eyebrows are still only a sparse sprinkle.)
Good luck with the depression, do give the meds a chance. They really can make a difference to your well being and give you the boost you need to get back on track.
I am also coming up to my mammogram date - June - and not looking forward to that for the memories it will bring, but realise just how important it is.

Good luck everyone... I hope the weeks and months ahead bring you strength and good healing.

June22

[jackster50]

Oh and my hair is awful. Fuzzy curls and looks like a birds nest ;(

[jackster50]

Its really nice to hear from you ladies again. Update on how im doing is that still suffering from pains in arms and legs. Fatique is awful and now on anti-depressants to help with hot flushes and my depression. I didnt think i was depressed but my doctor thinks that after spending a year under stress tablets were needed to bring me back to my 'proper self'. Hmmm, not sure that is going to happen. When i read past blogs from other ladies it would seem that after treatment is finished one does feel low. I need to get a job as my OH and children are getting on at me. I think they are getting fed up with me slumping around the house but I really dont know how I can face an interview let alone a job.

[Luvvie66]

Ps, my cherry blossom tree is in full flower....... I told myself last August that once the blossom appeared, spring was here and it would signify the start of my 'new' life:-)
xxxx hence my choice of Avatar xxxxxx

[Luvvie66]

It brings it all flooding back, doesn't it? Not that it ever really goes away:-(
I was told I'll get my 'call up' a year after my surgery... So mid July for me.
Not really looking forward to that particular envelope landing on the doormat.
Hopefully everyone's results will be fine...... And we can once breathe a big sigh of relief.
Let us know how you get on xxxx

[jackster50]

Hi Ya 🙂 I think Ive been forgotten as my mammogram was April last year and I havent heard a thing about having an anniversary one. I can only imagine how youre feeling but hopefully everything will be fine.
Jackie x

[jaxmackenzie]

Hey August Ladies.........how r you all doing? I expect like me you have or will soon have your "anniversary mammogram"? I had mine last week and now waiting , anxiously for the result Have any of you had your results.

xx

[mandymid]

Thankyou ladies. Massive relief and nice feeling to be finished. Just the small matter of tamoxifen now
hope you're all doing really well xxx

[mandyj]

Well done Mand. Been thinking of you. Onwards and upwards gal!! You will soon feel human again and its a relief after everything we have all been through.
Lots of luv
mandyjxx

[Swoot]

Hurrah! Well done Mandy.

Hope everyone is getting on ok 🙂

[mandymid]

Thankyou 🙂 I'm a bit like the tortoise and the hare! Get there eventually! Whoppppieeee x

[TigersGirlie]

Whoop whoop well done Mandy!!!! Xx

[mandymid]

Hi August ladies,
just thought I'd let you all know that I finished chemo on Monday almost 7 months after starting.....phew.....a long slog, and apart from my silly blood cells have got away quite lightly with s.e's really.
my hair is almost an inch long but still grey/white, so just got to commit to a colour now I'm done.
hope you're all doing well
mandy x

[June22]

Hi everyone. I have been reading all your messages, but being too lazy to log-in and wait ages for the forum to load... I stopped responding! Rather lazy and bad of me. 😞

Just to respond to Jaxmackenzie: I had my last chemo Jan 10th, had a blood transfusion on the 31st to pep me up for radiotherapy, which I started on the thursday just gone. But I am still getting chemo side effects... tender areas, aches in joints, feeling of nausea, tired legs etc.
I also ended up in hospital after the transfusion as a fever which had been brewing for about a week suddenly decided to rise, and as my PICC had been removed after the transfusion, I needed a cannula... or three. The first two resulted in my good arm swelling up, and the veins became irritated and inflamed, so they eventually had to use a vein in my foot! That seemed a fine solution to me as my arm was in too much pain for further prodding, but it bemused the nurses.

I sympathise with you, but I think many SE's are a result of our bodies still trying to recover from the Chemo and i hear it can take many months for it all to settle down. I do know of some other ladies who still have numbness in fingers/toes. Do ask your Dr/BCN about it when you are next seen though, in case something is a sign of infection rather than SE.
Lymphodema is no joke, and I hope you are able to get the condition eased now that you are seeing a LD specialist.
And what rotten luck with your port!

Wishing you well and all sorted out soon.

June22

[jaxmackenzie]

Hi Ladies...........
I finished chemo early Jan but still suffering from sore upper legs/arms, pins & needles in fingertips. Is anyone else still suffering nearly 2 months after last chemo?
Developed lymphodema 3 weeks ago and had to wait all this time to have appointment to see specia;ist tomorrow.
Also 2 weeks ago went for my Herceptin treatment through my port only for nurse to discover port had managed t to turnover. It is very rare but had to happen to me I'm now waiting for a date for the surgeon to cut my chest open to spin it round.
Just when I thought things were going to get better as chemo had finished , things are getting worse

[TigersGirlie]

Hi All

Mandymid you are nearly there!!!yes unfortunately will be sooner rather than later will keep you in the loop. I see my onc in 4 weeks for next apt will know more then.

Sounds like most of our hair is coming back. I'm personally struggling with the weight gain and fluid on legs. I would have the bloomin cancer which makes you gain weight lol!!

HOTFLUSHES is an understatement I think I have forest fires. I have to change nearly 4 times a day!!!considering moving to a nudist colony as could sweat away with no worry. i honestly did not think i could sweat so much from my legs lol. On a serious note check out a chillow it is amazing and what is allowing me some sleep.

Currently sitting in minus 2 outside dripping in sweat. Does anyone who else get dizzy wit them?

Hope you get nausea under control Mandy.

I bit the bullet as well as asked to be referred to cancer psychologist, def am struggling emotionally ATM. Glad to fin rads as got burns. Currently have some open sores not nice.

Hugs to all

Victoria xxx

[mandymid]

I know exactly what you mean about taking more tablets jackster. Id be loathe to take them too. I feel as if my bday would be thinking "what's she doing to me now?" More chemicals....
i so need to dye my hair....it's gross, really white/grey. I detest it more than a shiny head. Not even sure why they say don't dye it?
My eyebrows rand lashes are back to pre chemo so baring in mind I'm still at it I'm glad f that fact.
the sweats you describe sound awful. Are you on tamoxifen? I do get night a sweats but touch wood over the past few weeks they have subsided a bit.
hope you're ok, maybe speak to your onc or bcn about the flushes as I'm sure they'll be able to try something surely xxxx

[jackster50]

Mandy, I agree with your sisters comment i.e. how could you not be depressed but the thing is there is feeling low and then being chemically depressed the latter needing anti-depressants. Sounds a bit of a satire, eh but I was talking to a friend of mine who is a psychologist about it and she explained the difference. The reason for my question is that I really want to get back on the normality track but am a bit loath to go on anti-depressants as Ive heard that 1) sometimes it doesnt work and you have to spend ages getting the dose right and 2) you then spend ages coming off the tabs to reduce side effects -Ive had ENOUGH of side effects with chemo and all that sh** to add that to the regime.
I do laugh that I sometimes approach things far to academically rather than just going with the flow 😉
Update from me is that most side effects are going bar painful legs at night and stiffness during the day. The hot flushes (a term that totally under estimates the effect) are horrendously still plaguing me. I started to note down how often they appeared and yesterday I literally had 28 episodes. They are awful I sweat so much that my clothes are constantly wet and apart from standing under a shower for most of the day I am struggling to keep clean and hygenic. They get worse if I do something i.e. wash the dishes!! Im going to keep a record and then talk to the oncologist the next time I see her. Funny enough I had hot flushes 4 years ago which led me to taking HRT and they went after taking the tabs for a couple of days. My fear is that as my cancer was hormone fuelled so there will be no further HRT for me. So what will help, I dont know.
I dyed my hair again and my eyelashes are slowly emerging - brows are well underway. Dare I say Im begining to look somewhat normal :)))))))

[mandymid]

Hi all,
Glad the rads havent been too bad for moyou of you.
yes Mandyj I'm still suffering the wrath of chemo...I'm still at it so can't expect not to be. Have only got one more course to go (2 doses) end of feb and beginning of march, so I'm almost there. My main side effect is nausea and its disgusting, but only lasts several days.
jackster hope you're doing ok. I asked my sister how you would know if you were depressed going through this...her answer was how could you not be!
im going to see the ca psychologist on Tuesday. I'm not sure yet how it'll be and if it'lha help but I've figured it can't hurt. Have you had anything similar jackster.
tigersgirlie when will you have the oophrectomy? Sure that will be on the cards for me in the future too. You will have to give me the llowdown
positive thoughts to each and everyone of you
mandy xx

[Luvvie66]

Hi Mandyj


Wow, youve had your hair cut!


Mine is growing back but is still very very short..... And grey:-( looks a bit like Barak Obama! I'm going to dye it very soon, my onc said it was ok to do so as long as i used a natural product ie no peroxide.
I'm tired after rads, i finished last week. I went back to work when i started rads, in the new year. i have been ok, but got tired last week.


I was really emotional after finishing rads, couldnt stop crying...... Ive been quite upbeat for most of this joirney, so i think it was just all the emotion cmng out in one go. I feel better now, but am still dong a phased return to work.


You're right, it is a bit surreal.... Just like it all happened to someone else.


Hope all the other ladies are dong well, drop by and let us know how youre getting on xx

[Luvvie66]

Hi Mandyj

Wow, youve had your hair cut!

[mandyj]

Hello Ladies
How are the rads going? How are you folks coping after surgery? Anyone due surgery? Anyone still suffering the wrath of chemo?
Have just been going through our thread from the start. It's really weird going back and seeing what was written. I feel like it never really happened. It's surreal.
I have had my first hair cut! Well, a number 2 on the razor just to get some of the straggly fluff off. My MS has been the cause of my backaches, hope it is settling but it is very unpredictable. Have felt more tired than ever these last 2 weeks after finishing rads, so beware those of you who are near completion, it will zap you!
Hope to hear from you.
mandyj.xxx

[Luvvie66]

Hi everyone,
Jackster sorry to hear you are feeling a bit low. The rads road seems a long one but, in my experience, its nothing like as hard as chemo.
Grit your teeth, go the the GP and focus on the finish line. I do hope you feel brighter soon.
I started my tamoxifen on New Years Day and am having regular hot flushes at 3am and 5 am every night! Apart from that, I havent noticed any other side effects so i am feeling lucky. Im taking the Wockhardt brand, and will continue to do so as they seem to suit me so far.
Ive just got back from Rads....... Ive done 18, only 2 more to go. Again, i feel very fortunate that my skin seems to holding up well. Im using E45 on the advice of my onc....... Its funny how they all say differrent things!
Im also back at work, doing half days at the moment, increasing to full days during Feb after i finish rads. I never thought id say this, but it's lovely doing something 'normal' ........ I almost feel like me again! albeit a tired Version of my old self!
Still have a few blips and dark thoughts from time to time, but being back at work has lessened these......
Hope evryone else is well

[jackster50]

Hi All
Really nice to hear that things are getting better for everyone and Mandy you sound great. Im a bit torn on how things are at present. I started rads today and if Im honest the trip up to Maidstone just made me think that I want to get to the end of this journey now. Im debating whether I am depressed i.e. clinically, so go get anti-depressants or if Im just felling low due to present circumstances. Hmmmmmm
Negative things: broke; boiler not working properly; freezing cold most days; achy bones; fat and fed up
Positive things: hair growing; eyelashes growing; brows growing;chemo finished

Sorry to put a downer on things!!

Jackie

[Sika]

Yay mandyj!! It's good to hear that the rads didn't affect you too badly either - aside from the MS blip - and it's really lovely just to hear you sounding so happy! Interesting about the cream though - I'm not sure what to do. I brought aloe vera cream but the radiology team told me to just use aqueous cream ... I'm not very good at breaking rules! I start my 15 rads next Tuesday. Started tamoxifen a week or so ago.
Hugs to all! xx

[TigersGirlie]

Hi Mandy,

Thanks for advice my friend works for forever so will ask her to get me some. Have also had this special cream and dressings to put on.
thanks again
Victoria

[mandyj]

Hi Victoria
I had a friend advise me to use Aloe Vera spray and not to touch the aqueous cream with a barge pole. She had BC ten years ago and when researching the cream she found it contains paraffin. Surely putting paraffin on a sunburnt area would encourage more burning? She had no skin problems. I used it from day 1 of treatment and will continue to for 4 weeks after. I shower with Simple shower gel, pat dry with a towel and then spray the aloe vera on and let it air dry. Apart from my nipple feeling a bit itchy you can hardly tell that I have been radiated 20 times. I bought it off Ebay for about £8. Its made by the Forever Living company. Maybe its worth a try. I never told the staff at the hospital that I was using it, they just said 'your skin looks good are you using plenty of cream?' I just nodded and smiled.
Take care

Mandyj.xx

[TigersGirlie]

Hi Mandy'

Well done you must be really pleased. I'm 7 sessions in 13 more to go, ive been unlucky as my boob feels like it is sunburnt. Getting a special dressing on it tomorrow, well let you know how it is then. Have decided to go for oophrectomy as the zolodex implant Is very painful. Will see onc in week to discuss again. I c can't face 5 years of those injections!!!!!

Anyway love to all, hope everyone doing OK

Victoria xxx

[Swoot]

Hey Mandyj, happy new year! What great news - you must be so pleased 🙂 My surgery went ahead as planned and I have had good results, though now need to make a few decisions about my next steps - rads or more surgery...

how is everyone else? Hope you're all doing ok and keeping up with your treatment plans 🙂

[mandyj]

Hi All
Just wondered how the new year was going for you all. I am officially a rad grad! Graduated with a first!! Had no skin problems throughout, tiredness was not bad, drove myself to all but three of the sessions. Had 20 in all. Cannot believe that I have finally come to the end of my treatment. For a review in 6 to 8 weeks. Hooray, I have my life back, plus my taste buds and some dark stubbly hair over my head. Never thought this day would come way back when this all started.
Hang on in there girls. Chemo, rads and surgery will soon be done and you will feel human again I promise. had a minor blip with my multiple sclerosis (don't think it liked rads) but all feels well today. Enjoyed building a snowman and sledging today with my 4 year old boy.
Hope to hear from you all.
mandyj.xx

[Sika]

ha, mandymid and.swoot you are right! Ive changed into two humans now 🙂 rambling nonsense in two places! mandyj I am also happy rads are easier than chemo, though more frequent night sweats won't be fun. I will join you in that pool mandymid. I've drunk once during chemo (well 3 weeks post last one and just 1.5 pints) and the sweating was awful. I hope that vitamin c kills that.cold soon swoot.

strangely enough, while I've been neutropenic I havent caught anything despite being in crowded.shops, at a conference and living with my daughter who has had one vomity flu thing and two colds and leaves snotty tissues everywhere. weird.

okay - happy goodbye to 2012¡

[mandymid]

Talking of autocorrect may I just correct my last post "cackest" not casket !!
either way it was rubbish!
swoot I hope you get rid of the germs before the surgery, zinc alongside vitamin c is quite good
xxxxx

[Swoot]

I feel like crap tonight, seem to be catching cold after cold since finishing chemo- nice to hear that rads are easy compared to chemo mandyj - not sure if I could cope with worse. Went to my gp to see if there's anything they can give me for my latest cold before my op on fri, of course there isn't, so I'm drinking vitamin c tonight instead of bubbly. Totally agree with you about iPad autocorrect on here sika, it's doing my head in. I also wondered if you were the black cat too sika 🙂
have a good evening ladies x

[mandyj]

Mandymid - the hot sweats on chemo were bearable, on Tamox they got a little more frequent so night times were hell with all the broken sleep, I was knackered. Starting to settle down again now. I find that tea and alcohol don't help!
Oh the fun we have.
xx

[mandymid]

Hi sika I've had a day of feeling glum too, want to say goodbye good and proper to the caskest year of my life but don't physically feel well enough after treatment on Friday :(. Hoping I have the energy to enjoy my biggest boys 16th bday tomorrow.
Great news that your nodes were clear p.s are you the black cat on the fb younger women's group?
Mandyj my back still aches but I had a bone scan and it was clear so I don't care so long as its not that! Hope the s.es from tamoxifen settle soon. are the night sweats worse than on chemo? i'll be sleeping in a pool.....oh yakkkk.
Happy new year girls, it's surely gotta be better than this one
lovd Mandy x

[Sika]

Hi everyone, merry Christmas and happy new years to you all!

I ended up having a lovely lazy happy Christmas with my beautiful daughter. Tonight's new year will be a bit of an opposite though - home alone feeling very sorry for myself.

I finished chemo mid-nov and had my node clearance 12 days ago. I have a massive seroma under my armpit (like a c cup breast) and some cording - both of which are veI uncomfortable .... But, the nodes were clear! Yay. However, my neutrophils are still very low which is odd. They were 0.58 during surgery (surgeon was a bit freaked out by this and wouldn't have done the surgery if she had known), went up to 2.4 the day after surgery, but last Thursday were back down to 1! Over 6weeks after last chemo! Anyway, I am far. From feeling normal. But I don't know what normal will feel like and am not sure if I will recognise it. I don't know when I am am goingtoget over this pity party and self-enforccedisolation from the world.

Seeing onc in a couple of weeks to talk about next steps ( rads and tamoxifen I assume).
Luvvie - hitting a wall is very apt.

Grr - forgot how hard it is to type on this forum with the iPad .. All the autocorrects and silly things it does.

Anyway, it is lovely to read about how you are all doing, and nice to hear about nice Christmases. Sending lots of hugs and hopes for 2013 being a hell of a lot better than 2012 xxx

[mandyj]

Hi All
Glad to see that everyone managed to enjoy christmas despite some side effects for our chums still on chemo. I had a great and busy christmas. Was nice to finally taste some food!!
I too have the white fuzzy hair do with some brown attempting to emerge, wish it would hurry up! My fingertips are still a bit numb and I think I may lose the nail on my left index finger as it wobbles a bit. As long as its just one!
Started Tamoxifen on Dec 19th, had more hot flushes and a bit of nausea but doing ok. The only thing that is getting me down is the backache, followed by a bit of thigh and calf muscle ache. I can only assume its the tamoxifen as is wasn't there before. It seems to have found my weakest muscles, after too many years nursing my back was always going to suffer!
Well must dash now as off to rads number 7 of 20. This is a walk in the park compared to chemo!!
Happy New Year ladies and let life begin again in 2013 for us all.
mandyj.xxx

[June22]

Swoot - good luck for Friday's operation. My own WLE was back in July and it is looking good now. I wish you the same good results.

Luvvie66, Jackster50 and Mandymid - so nice to see your messages. Yes, the journey still has a way to go, but the end of this particular tunnel is in sight, and it will be good to see daylight. And together we will not leave anyone to cope alone.
Luvvie66, I hope the numbness goes away soon! I have brown patches on my large toenails but I think they might just be saved from coming off since the TAX dose was reduced. And as for the brain thing... I do hope it isn't permanent in my case!! 😕
(As you know, we are assured by other BC ladies that our minds DO return to normal - whatever normal was/is.)

I've spent much of today in bed asleep, so I must be hitting the midway low where I feel breathless and tired. But on the plus side, perhaps more tastebuds will work tomorrow! 🙂


New year will happen quietly for me, so I'll wish you all the very best for the new year ahead, in case I don't get online again for a bit.

June22

[mandymid]

I've seen one in holland nd barrat jackster so assume that would be ok. My colour sounds v similar to yours. Mine is mainly white with a dark grey patch at the front and darker at the back. It's fluffy like baby hair. May try and hang fire just a little longer!
Hoorah for roots. If my pins are anything to go by I'm not goin to be short Of hair....typical.
swoot try and rest up a bit before your surgery if you possibly can with your little fella xxxxx

[Swoot]

Hi ladies, glad to hear you had good Christmases and may I wish you all a happy new year. We had a great Christmas at my mum and dad's, with my sis and her family too. It was really relaxing as I wasn't allowed to do anything and everyone else kept my son busy! I'm feeling a bit wiped out now though, not really sure why... I have my WLE and ANC booked for Friday, so as with everyone else, treatments continue. Here's to a better 2013!

[jackster50]

Mandy I scorred Boots to find a herbal, semi-permanent etc to no avail and ended up choosing Olio (i think thats how its spelt) which doesnt use Amonia but oils. It covered the grey perfectly and left hair feeling soft rather than wirey. I know they say you shouldnt dye it for 6 months but I couldnt cope with that as my hair was grey with dark patch and looked awful So I was willing to take the risk.

May I add that I have small roots showing already (hehehehehehehehe)

[mandymid]

Jackster which hair dye did you choose, I look like a fluffy (white) tennis ball and I'm not putting up with it for much longer!!!
Can't wait to at least get some colour onto my hair
mandy xx