Hi,
I never knew anyone with Breast Cancer before I was diagnosed, and I have not met anyone who had same treatment as me - Neo-Adjuvent. I wonder if there is anyone at the same station as me? I call it a station because I feel as though I have been on a speeding train journey. All the stations were my treatments, appointments etc. Now I’m stuck in a station waiting for the next train! From Jan 2012 until Dec 2012 I went through Chemo, Left side axillary clearance, Bilateral MX with Tissue expanders, then a repair job as one side slipped down, & Radiotherapy. I had the expanders replaced with implants Oct 2013. Then in Jan 2014 Plastc Surgeon said left side was not working out due to Rads & very thin skin. Now I am waiting for Lattisimus Dorsi on left and adjustment to right side (it’s slipped again) Thus the feeling of being stuck in the station, next train not until July/August. I was great up until a few months ago. I got through all stages of treatment in good spirits & health, with only the odd meltdown. Now I am feeling so fatigued, aching all over and emotional, and just not right with myself. I worry I will not have the same fight to get through next op. I know I am a bit down, maybe it is just hitting me what I have gone through. I rarely entertained the ‘what ifs’ Now I am doing it retrospectively and I am having small panic/anxiety spells. I don’t know where I thought I would be at this stage post diagnosis. I guess I thought it would all be behind me and I woud be fit & well. I wonder if I should bother with more surgery, will I feel any better, will the pain & discomfort get better or worse, what if this next op fails too? So many doors opening & closing in my brain! I know women who have return to work and are living full lives months after treatment and I feel like I am some kind of sham. I can barely manage 2 afternoons as a Volunteer, never mind think of returning to work! Does this all pass, am I ‘normal’ My iron levels are showing low saturation & GP keeps giving me Iron pills, but do not seem to help. I do not have much faith in GPs when it comes to Cancer treatment and its effects, they do not seem to know much. I am on Tamoxifen and I do not know if I am experiencing side effects from them or ALL my treatments, or am I just getting older? (57)