It sounds like you and your wife are having a diffiult time at the moment, I see some of the other users have replied to your other thread. As well as the support you have there you might find it helfpul to talk things through with a member of staff on the BCC helpline. Here you can talk through your thoughts and concerns with some one who will offer you a listening ear as well as emotional support and practical information. The number to call is 0808 800 6000 and lines are open weekdays 9 to 5pm and Saturday 10 to 2pm.
Best wishes Sam, BCC Facilitator