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Treatment coming to an end having major meltdown

10 REPLIES 10
Boodles
Member

Re: Treatment coming to an end having major meltdown

Hi Syers38, i hadthe same diagnosis as you and i have my last chemo tomorrow before 15 radiotherapy. I had 3 FEC , 1 Docetaxol and 6 taxol.... i found i was on this site all the time and it hot me down so much that i stopped coming on here about 6 weeks ago....until today. Try calling your BCN or macmillan and you will get someone who will give you lots of positive cases and make you feel loads better... and get iff this site coz you will get so depressed. Good luck and dont forget we have gone through this to get rid of the cancer which we have now done. Take care lovely x
Syers38
Member

Re: Treatment coming to an end having major meltdown

Thank you that has helped a lot .. Feeling calmer today still feeling very emotional but I really need to move forward .. Can't let this vile thing beat me .. Thank you xx
wyn
Member

Re: Treatment coming to an end having major meltdown

Hi Syers38,

 

It's only natural you will be feeling this way don't be too hard on yourself. I totally understand where your coming from as I was diagnosed in Nov 2013 with Triple Neg, lumpectomy,chemo and rads and felt the same as you when treatment came to an end a year past July as there is no meds after active treatment and it feels like the safety net has dissapeared leaving you feeling vulnerable,

I can honestly say for the first twelve months or so I was thinking the worst with any ache or pain as I am aware of the higher risk of recurrence in the first 2-3 yrs, but believe me it does get easier and you will be able to move on, I am now enjoying my life, got a new job and making the most of it and you will too as every day you will get stronger physically and emotionally.

 

If I can be of any further help just message me

 

Take care and sending hugs

Wyn

Syers38
Member

Re: Treatment coming to an end having major meltdown

Thanks ladies I've got some counselling next week .. I think its because I have Tnbc the reacurrance rate is higher than hormonal breast cancers ... I'm so so scared .. I'm usually such a positive person . Can't bear the thought of it becoming secondary ...
But I'm going on along walk today while weather nice to clear my head .. I know I have to move forward and I'm sure with time it will get easier .
Thanks again
Anna_BCC
Member

Re: Treatment coming to an end having major meltdown

Dear Syers38

 

Breast Cancer Care also have a series of services under the umbrella of Moving Forward becasue we recognise how difficult it can be when active treatment comes to end.  Many people have shared how scary a time this can be for them, which is why these services have been developed.

 

Do have a look to see what is in your area and if you have any questions, please do contact them directly.  0345 077 1893

 

Best wishes
Anna
Digital Community Officer

Sameoldme
Member

Re: Treatment coming to an end having major meltdown

 

Hi Syers38......it is a really scary time, I agree...your body has been virtually taken over by the medical profession for probably 6 or 7 months and you can feel dumped, anxious, elated all at the same time.  Similar diagnosis to you.....diagnosed December 2011, WLE, 6 x FEC-T, 23 rads and now on Anastrozole (although ER only weakly positive).  

 

Life is pretty much absolutely great........mostly feel like all this happened to someone else, although have occasional wobbles!  I found this article very useful (quite long, but worth a read for reassurance that how you feel is absolutely OK 🙂 http://www.cancercounselling.org.uk/Peter%20Harvey%20-%20After%20the%20Treatment%20Finishes%20then%2...

 

My Grandpa used to say 'worry is like a rocking chair......goes backwards and forwards but never gets you anywhere' ..... Unless of course you've got really slippery floors!!!!!

 

Do you have a MacMillan or similar attached to your hospital....do they offer free complementary treatments...Reiki was fab for me, and I also practice Mindfulness which really helps to put everything in perspective.....you can get great Mindfulness colouring books too....which really help to sort of get back in touch with the present, as after treatment, it's all too easy to linger on the past and worries for the future.

 

Look after yourself....J x

 

 

mary32
Member

Re: Treatment coming to an end having major meltdown

Hi Syers

 

My mum survived for another 35 years after radical mx and node clearence and died of something completely unrelated. But it is true where I read somewhere that you can only be sure that you are 'cured' of cancer when you die of something else. I know that may sound morbid but it resonates for me.

 

I have just had my 2nd annual check-up and I did feel like you do now when my treatment finished. And every ache and pain I was sure was sinister. This time last year I had big problems with my knee and so was convinced I had bone secondaries. I had an mri and was dx with a torn ligament. And after all, no matter how low the % of recurrence may be statistically, someone falls into the not so lucky group and it could be me or you.

 

But.... it does get better, gradually. Yes, the cancer could come back but in the meantime we can get on with life and actually make sure we really make the best of what we have because we have an inkling of our mortality which I think a lot of people forget - that none of us live forever.

 

Sorry, I have gone on a bit but please believe that it does get better and the worry, while it stays with you, does become something you think about less.

 

Take care.

 

Mary

Jobey68
Member

Re: Treatment coming to an end having major meltdown

What a lovely positive message Val! Your aunt sounds fab, I'd settle for that! Trouble is we focus so much on the negative things we read and forget that breast cancer is so treatable now and yes it may come back but that too can be dealt with and many women are living like your aunt with it and enjoying life Xx 

Val235
Member

Re: Treatment coming to an end having major meltdown

Syers38 I have an aunt who is almost 85 she had a mastectomy 25 years ago no chemo just radiation she has secondaries now diagnosed 2 years ago in her lungs but she works at a hospice in the office she goes every week day and works for about 4 hours. She has inhalers and is still enjoying life. She loves shopping trips at the weekend her work which she says is her life although totally voluntary  is very important to her.

Her attitude to life is what I want to have when my treatment is finished keep busy and enjoy life.. I understand how you feel continually going to the hospital I think gives you some security but there is life out there so try to brave and you will be fine I am sure. congratulations on completing all that treatment. Hugs Val

Jobey68
Member

Re: Treatment coming to an end having major meltdown

Hiya, it's a really scary time coming to the end of treatment but you will settle down, mine finished in June and it took me a few months for it to not dominate my every waking minute,it's so hard not to read things that upset you but amongst it all there are so many positive stories as well, you will gain some confidence as time passes and will also be closely monitored, try not to focus so much on it coming back, it's gone now and there's a good chance it was still that way! Xx Jo 

Syers38
Member

Treatment coming to an end having major meltdown

I'm having my last rads tomorrow and I can't stop crying .. I'm so scared of reacurrance .. I seem to be reading a lot of doom and gloom .. So many reacurances I've read happening only months after treatment ..
Can't get this out of my head .
I need some positive stories .
I am triple negative grade 3 no lymph node . Lumpectomy.. 3 EC 12 taxol 23 rads
Help 😥