I'm so sorry to hear you're going through this, I can't imagine how difficult it must have been to receive this news.
I'm glad your GP is being supportive and helpful through this, we also have some information on support services which I hope might be useful: http://bit.ly/1XSO4Ax
Take care of yourself,
Becca at Breast Cancer Care.
Arnie, I'm sorry that you are going through this and with a five year old. I can only imagine how much your head must be spinning from this news. That news would depress anyone. It's completely unfair that while you are this sick and shook up that you have to think of your daughter's future. Unfortunately you must! I truly hope the drs are wrong!! Do you have family or friends nearby who can help you through these decisions. I think I would need to make my choices and get any legal work done quickly. Then I could put those papers in a safe place and then concentrate on my daughter and myself. I would suggest counseling for both of you. I'm not trying to be a know it all. Just trying to state the things that need taken care of and the way I would hope to handle it. I know I would be curled up in a ball crying too. I would need someone to shake me!! I also know that I would want to make the choices for my child. I wouldn't want the courts to dictate it. You need to decide how you want to handle it. Only you know what you're capable of. I hope your onc is wrong!! Big Hugs!!FF
Hi all, I have been quiet as was dealing with my second reoccurance triple negative. Got through my second round of chemo which ended in Dec. Gem/Carbo. No further treatment just routine checks. I noticed two lumps appear on my mascetomy. Ultrasound was normal but my surgeon did a biopsy. First biopsy was okay but he was not happy with sample. Second biopsy the news was it has come back and is aggressive. Being sent for CT and bone scan. I am in a total mess. GP good as I am now on anti depressents and have diazepan for anxiety. Have curled up in a ball, can't eat and cry everytime I look at my 5 year old daughter. Scared as it came back just 5 months. Dreading results. Had counselling and during this she was mentioning me facing my death and making plans which has thrown me even deeper into negativity.
Anyone who can support?
Jinxie, sorry you have had to join us but welcome. We are all familiar with the bottom dropping out of our world so know exactly how you are feeling.Even more scary for us TN ladies!! The uncertainty of it all is very difficult and the 'how long have i got left' qestion is never very far away from your mind. I have never asked for a prognosis and just try to take heart from the ladies on here who have had secondaries for several years. Please feel free to rant rave and cry on here as often as you like...we all understand.
Arnie, i was put in touch with my homeopathist via the breast care unit. I also see a therapist for reflexology, reiki, aromatherapy etc.
They are both very good listeners which helps as you can tell them things you probably wouldnt share with your family. I have had several homeopathic 'remedies' to help with everything from tearfulness to energy to organs etc, They include pulsatilla,,carcinosin, caeanothus & berberis, ignatia.....cant remember whats for what or even if they do any good but they are doing no harm (as far as i'm aware) and at least i fel like i am doing something positive by trying them. She tells me what i need and then i order it from a company called Helios.May be worth asking your BCN if there is any such servicewhere you are. xx
I too do not understand why your oncologist would say no to antidepressants. Mine was quite happy for my to start on them. I wouldn't be able to get out of bed if I hadn't after my husband died in August and I was diagnosed with secondary breast cancer a short while afterwards (after never having a primary diagnosis). Next time you meet with him or her, please ask again why you cannot start on antidepressants.
Jinxie, You are not alone in being scared! Unfortunately, we are all individuals with cancer that is as unique and individual as us. There is no crystal ball for predictions. My oncologist told me the average life expectancy was 2 years. I've been here 11 with lung mets and now one bone met. My cancer is ER + and very slow growing. It has responded well to chemo, but the first hormonal did nothing. I will say that we were all terrified in the beginning and we all seem to settle down when we have a plan of action (POA) and get treatment underway. We are a bunch of nervous ninny's at scan time. You will see a thread on here called scanxiety. Most of us hang out and chat on the bone met thread. There is a make believe place called cyber cafe, where there is no cancer or calories just wild imaginations. There is a private forum to join, where you can post pictures, play word games, book talk, gardening advice, etc. I'm sure more ladies will be along to welcome you. Welcome! Hugs, FF
i had Fec-T and paclitaxol in 2014-5 and for the recurrance am on gem/carbo. I had my 6/6 cycle yesterday with a top up of gem next week if bloods are okay.
I am not sure why the oncologists said no to the happy pills. It may be as I am so close to finishing chemo and am due tests so keeping chemicals low but in meantime I have found doing headspace a help and after chemo am going to go to macmillan relaxation classes again, if I make the brave move back as I use to do it.
I am interested in your experience with homeopath can you tell me more?
I am open to anything.
I always find diet hard as I hear and read so many different things.
Thank you for your reply.
Glad to see your surgery apparently went well. When you say you are at the end of your second round of chemo do you mean your second type of chemo or are you on your first one?
We all know the 'emotional wreck' one ...as you have probably realised this disease is one hell of a roller coaster. I dont understand why your oncologist is telling you to hold off on the anti depressants. i didnt want to have any but in the end my psychologist and homeopathist both suggested i shold have them and my onc had no objections. You should have anything that will help get you through this.
We all deal with the stress in different ways....distraction techniques, meditation, relaxtion...try anything available to you and please let us know how you get on. xx
thank you for your kind words of encouragement earlier this year. I am now at the end if my second round of chemo and am an emotional wreck. Waiting for counselling and oncologist wants to wait before giving me antidepressents. How did you deal with it all coming to the end of your third chemo? How are you at the moment? Do you have any good advice? Your words and story helped before.
Hi Tolliebelle, thank you for yor reply. You must be so drained of it all but understand once it is away we find the strength. My surgery is mid June, a month, so not long to wait really. Then have to wait two weeks for them to decide on the next step. At the moment i am trying to be positive, and I think hearing from people, like yourself who keep on fighting is fantastic. What chemo did you have the second time? Have you had single or double mascetomy? Need to probably find out somewhere about what to expect there and get some good tips. Thank you for your encouragement. Thank you
Hi Arnie I have had BC 3 times since 2011 all triple negative and had to have chemo each time last one was last year finished in October. Good that bone and CT scans were clear! If you do need more chemo you will get through it! Friends used to tell me this can honestly say didn't believe them by third time lol but I did!!! When is your surgery??? Sometimes it seems easier once you get going on the treatment treadmill and the waiting is behind you I know I felt that way xxxx
I am new to this and not sure if I am posting in the correct place. I was diagnosed with TN in 2014, had lumpectomy, chemo and radiation. Was feeling positive and like many of us getting life back in order. I found an abnormaility which led to shadows on ultra sound. Two biopsies coming back with, luckily, pre cancer cells. They had not changed but have just appeared. I was sent for my first CT and bone scan and again luckily clear. I have been booked for a mascetomy and node clearance with which they are going to check for cancer cells. I have been told they suspect they will find some so be prepared fir a second round of chemo, which I am scared as I often ended in hospital last time.
I will of course fight it as I have a 4 year old and she is my life, passion and provided the will to fight.
I am a silent member but this time wanted to post to see if there are any people who are/were in a similar position. Or people who after the second round of treatment are with NED and can provide a little extra support and encouragement.
Hope this is in the right place as I am a techno phobe despite being only 44.
I'm so sorry you've had a secondary diagnosis. I had Carboplatin with Gemcitabine, though I missed half of the Gemcitabines and had a reduced dose after the first cycle because of low neutrophils. Despite that, I got to NED for a few months and I found it a much kinder chemo than FEC-T. I was able to keep a good level of fitness, felt very well and had few side effects. The platinum based treatments (Carboplatin is one) have been shown to be more effective against TN.
Best of luck with everything. Ask any questions and we're all here to try to help.
I'm so sorry to hear of your recurrence. It must be particularly hard to cope with as you were approaching that 5 year milestone. I remember how gut wrenching it was when I find out about my recurrence and then finding out it had spread and was incurable. I'm also TN and have it in my lymph nodes and skin.
As Wolfie says, it does get a bit easier in time. Once you get started on treatment it gives you a different focus. What chemo will you be having?
I am really sorry to hear you are going through this difficult time and I am sure some of our users will be offering their advice and support soon.
I have moved your post to the 'Living with secondary breast cancer' board as this has many active users.
In the meantime please do call our support line at 0808 800 6000 who will be able to talk to you about how you are feeling, treatment and offer you a friendly ear.
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