Virtually hugs needed

[ali1961]

Very glad to hear it. And even if they recommend chemo, it's entirely doable. 

Have a a good night's sleep

Ali x

[rach1b70]

Good news so far. The cancer had not hit the lymph nodes and it was removed with clear margins around it.

So far I am having radiotherapy then tamoxifen for 10 years.

One of the tests has come back borderline for chemotherapy so when I meet with the oncologist next week they will decide what way to go.

More waiting, but knowing it has been removed and not gone any further is a relief.

Lots of love xxxxx

[Jo C]

Good luck for today Rach xx

[jjleeds]

Thinking of you today and wishing the best possible outcomes xx

[rach1b70]

OMG I am overwhelmed by the support here tonight. You ladies are absolutely amazing. I am a complete mess but have had the most wonderful pre birthday and results evening with my two closest friends.

Thank you so much you super women. I will be back with my news tomorrow 💕💕💕😘😘

[ali1961]

And a hug from a random person who understands what you're feeling. Hope tomorrow is ok, I'll be thinking of you.

Ali x

when I say 'random person' I do have breast cancer too. I haven't just wandered in off the street! 

[jjleeds]

Hi Rach,  Just a glimmer of hope for tomorrow,

After a morning stressing and thinking of all the worst case scenarios my results were better than I could have hoped for, all margins from WLE were clear, they had taken 6 nodes not the one I thought due to damage caused to them during biopsies earlier but all were clear. Tumour was grade 1 so the best outcome. Even had a chuckle as the pathology but my cancer type as odd (Don't think that is a technical term) as it wasn't one of the usual types. 5 days in Tenerife come Saturday then 15 radiotherapy sessions and 5 years on Tamoxifen.... I have everything crossed you get similar results .. Will be thinking of you tomorrow. I am now going for my first proper bath in 2 weeks and daring myself to look at my boob. Had the dressing taken off at the hospital but daren't look so going to check out the battle scars

[Strudel]

Have another hug from me. The day before my op results was the worst day so far. I remember it all far too clearly. I was convinced they were going to be awful and they were as good as they could have been. I said to my consultant that I was convinced they'd be awful and he just said "we would have dealt with then whatever they were." Xx

[Jo C]

Hi Rach, as others have said, it is perfectly normal to feel like you do. The waiting game is the worst. Things will get better even if it doesn't feel like it now. It's ok to have bad days. Be kind to yourself.

What I really wanted to say is, please don't feel like you are letting your children down. I felt that way a few weeks ago but it really is not the case. You aren't letting anyone down. You didn't choose this and you will fight this and come out the other side. You are strong, even if you don't feel like it and will become stronger. Your children will be proud of you so don't feel bad about those bad days.

Big, big hugs,

Jo xx

[rach1b70]

Thank you everyone who left a comment today. They have really helped me through. It's been a tough one, but I am home from. Lovely Lunch, in my pjs and chilling on the sofa. Tomorrow cannot come soon enough. I can then get things straight in my kind.

Take care lovely ladies.
Much love 💕💕xx

[Jill1998]

Hugs to those struggling today and fingers crossed for your results . Bad days are normal and sometimes come out if the blue ,you would be pretty blooming strange if you didn't have days when you seriously wobble this is scary stuff to deal with no matter how strong you are it's also very isolating and people who've not been through it really can't understand the impact ,

[ladybowler]

rach

Darling this is perfectly understandable and we all know what that feels like, so you are in the very best place to get this off your chest, you a scared for all the reasons that you have said.  I remember when I started radiotherapy I had a complete meltdown on the third day because I felt that I had lost control of my life, it was dictated by this daily hospital appointment which I did not like, I burst into tears, the guys there were wonderful sat me down, said all the right things and basically put me back on my feet again to enable me to carry on, and that is exactly what we are going to do with you.  Virtual hugs and hands are with you as are the tough pants, they havent had to come out for a while, but they are winging their way to me xx

Once you get your results tomorrow you will know exactly what you are dealing with and you should get your treatment plan.  This will then enable you to know what is happening and when, and you will then be able to plan.  I felt strangly calm when I had mine, I suppose because I felt relieved that I knew what was happening.

You are strong you just do not feel it at the moment, but we are all here to support you, hold your hand and give you loads of hugs

Helena xxx

[Pineapples]

jjleeds and rach1b70 my thoughts are with you both. Scary time but soon you will know what you are dealing with and can tackle it. Waiting with no news is very difficult. I hope you have a good doctor to tell you what is happening and that you can feel our hugs and support. Tlc

[rach1b70]

Good luck with your results lovely. The waiting is awful.

I will be thinking of you this afternoon xxx

[jjleeds]

I'm in a very similar position, x The ladies on here are so helpful and supportive x I just burst into tears as I got a bouquet of flowers this morning with a card reminding me how strong I am from an old school friend who has been through this and knew I would need a boost today x Results at 3.15 today good luck tomorrow x 

[rach1b70]

Thank you xx

[RoadRunner]

Hi Rach

couldn't read and ignore (even tho' I'm time wasting at work...)

Being out of control is so hard, isn't it, if you are used to being in control.  And results tomorrow - that's scary!  So it's ok to have a bad day.  You will have plenty of those (sorry, but that's the reality), but you will get good days too.  And you have a lovely family to support you.  

I was diagnosed at 44, with three kids.  They were 17, 14 and just turning 12 at the time.  Now I am 10 years on, youngest will be 22 next month.  So I've seen all three leave school, two graduate, and the youngest is doing medicine so won't graduate till next year.  

You will achieve your milestones too.  Just don't be hard on yourself now 

Right, must work!

PS - sending hugs

[rach1b70]

Well today is not a good day. I am struggling with everything. I am trying to ask myself what is different? Why is today so hard? So I made a list.

My results still come in tomorrow - this has not changed.

Tomorrow is my birthday.

My arm movement is good.

I have been to lunch with friends everyday, so have not been left alone.

My daughters have called from university to check up on me.

I am young and strong.

But

I am yet to cry

I am petrified and afraid of the unknown.

I am 46 years old

I have a wonderful husband and three beautiful children that I am frightened of letting down.

I have lost control of this stage in my life and I don't like it.

Sorry for the downhearted post, but I needed to get it off my chest.

Much love and hugs to all of you inspirational and strong ladies. Thank you for being there 💕💕💕😘😘