I’m not sure where I should post this. I didn’t want to post in a “non-secondary” area as don’t want to scare anyone who are going through a first diagnosis.
I had DCIS in 2010 with lumpectomy, rads and Tamox. I then found TNBC in other boob in Feb 2013. No lymph node involvement. Had chemo, lumpectomy and rads. Finished rads in December (had a bout of pneumonia between op and rads so treatment took longer to finish).
About this time last month had chest x-ray because I thought I was getting pneumonia again. Nothing came up, but on the other lung there were three small shadows.
Got sent for CT scan, and the shadows didn’t show up, but they found an enlarged mediastinal lymph node 2 x 2.5cm . Onc says could be infection / other disease (eg Lupus/ TB etc) / cancer / secondary cancer.
Got sent for PET scan last week and will get the results next Thursday.
Basically, all this waiting has sent my mind into overdrive. Its the whole not-knowing thing, and I can barely think of anything else. I feel I need to go through the different scenarios, so if it does turn out to be secondaries I can deal with it.
I also had a CT scan last week because the Onc thought I had something hard near my liver, but its come back clear. A well-meaning friend said I worry too much, and shouldn’t have spent all my time worrying as she knew it would be nothing.(!)
I know worrying isn’t going to help or change the outcome but I don’t know how to stop worrying! I actually think I will feel better when I know the results, whatever they are, as that is how I felt when I had my two BC diagnoses.
I am not even sure why I am writing this, I just feel I have to share with someone who knows what this feels like. Am I getting it all out of proportion?
Hi Spudgirl
Whilst waiting for replies to your post maybe you would like to give our free helpline a call where the staff can offer practical information as well as emotional support. The free phone number is 0808 800 6000 and the lines are open Monday to Friday 9.00 to 5.00 and Saturday 10.00 to 2.00.
Best wishes
June, moderator
Hi, i dont think your blowing things out of proportion, its only natural to be worried
my first dx woz Feb 07 and got dx with bones Feb this year, i worried myself silly waiting for the scan results and even now i have my “wobbly days” some days i seem to eat, sleep and breath the C word!!
Fingers crossed for you take care Janette x
Hi spudgirl,
I know how you feel about waiting for results as I have been stressed the last couple of weeks waiting for mine and have had them today. They aren’t as good as I would have liked but they could have been worse but now that I know I feel much better. Once you know what you are dealing with you can tackle it. Keep yourself busy if you can and treat yourself and the week will pass.
I have just posted a thread about mixed results.
Take care. I hope all is well when you get your results next week. Love Sheila. Xx
Hi,spud girl,it is only natural to be worried and the waiting is torture . We all understand what you are going through.
Try to get out and do nice things with friends & family as that will help take your mind off the waiting.
Huge hugs & good luck,Helen xxx
Spudgirl maybe your ‘well-meaning’ friend should be doing your onc’s job! Joking aside it sounds like you have a good onc he has certainly been very thorough in checking out anything that has shown up. The worryworm would be getting to most of us with all the uncertainty you have been facing. I think most of us would also say we felt better once we got answers and knew what we were facing. Fingers crossed for you that this swollen node has a simple explanation such as infection. We will be here if you need us though so do let us know how you get on next Thursday.
Dawn
xx