Hi - I was diagnosed with grade 3 breast cancer (ductal) on 4th May.
I had a sentinel node biopsy on 9th May from my armpit, 4 nodes removed, all clear. However, I met my oncologist on 17th May who advised that as my lump is on the inner part of my breast and the fact that the ultrasound has picked up ‘something else’ near my breastbone, it may be that the tumour is draining in the opposite direction to the nodes removed. So, really I’m none the wiser as to whether it’s spread or not!
I start chemotherapy on Tues 31st (though yet to be officially confirmed). I have a mammogram on Monday, a hair care appointment and CT scan on Tues, my pre assessment appointment with the chemo nurses on Wed and another appointment with my oncologist on Friday. So much to squeeze into one week.
My lump is very fast growing - it had doubled in size in a month and I can still feel it growing and spreading throughout my breast whilst I wait for treatment to start. I think I have also found another lump on my other breast now. I am freaking out that I am too late now for the treatment to work! I have a 2.5 year old son and all I can think about is him growing up without his mummy. I’m so scared at the rate it’s growing. I know some of it may be swelling etc from the biopsy but my gut feeling says not. I also keep feeling like something is pushing into my ribs (on the opposite site to my ‘poorly’ breast though) and am convinced it’s spread to my liver or my bones. Am dreading the results of the CT scan. I don’t know how I’ll cope if they confirm it has spread and it’s now just a case of managing it rather than treating it. I know I shouldn’t jump to conclusions but when I keep finding new lumps and feeling discomfort elsewhere, I don’t know what else to think.
Are there any others out there that had fast tumour growth but are now ok?
Hi, I can’t offer you reassurance but I am waiting for my results tomorrow and also thinking there are pains in my other breast, and convinced the lymph nodes near my collarbone are involved too.I really think that stress can make you imagine all sorts of symptoms that aren’t really there. I think everyone panics it has spread, and the not knowing is the worst thing.
Just sending you best wishes and hope everything goes well for you.
Bonbai try to remember that they can successfully treat even ladies who had spread to their nodes. I was a grade 3 & HER2+, which meant fast grower with growth accelerator. I too hated the gap between diagnosis & surgery (I did that before chemo) & found it very stressful, with my mind running scenarios of cancer cells pinging off & spreading. In fact the tumour had grown by 25% between diagnosis & surgery, but it had NOT spread to my nodes. These things take time & a few weeks does not affect your outcome. I felt instantly calmer the day treatment started, because I felt we were fighting it & hopefully you will too. How are you sleeping? My husband & I barely slept a wink for 2 weeks & got some mild sleeping tabs from the GP in the end, because we were waking each other up. Why don’t you call the helpline & chat things through with one of the lovely nurses. They are wonderful & will be able to give you some reassurance. Also try to do some deep, slow breathing, focusing just on the air going in & out. Do that any time you feel your thoughts getting on top if you. Your anxiety is a perfectly normal thing, but, of course, worrying won’t change anything. Cancers like stress hormones, so try your best to be calm. I know that is easier said than done. Good luck for your chemo. xx
Hiyer Bonbai,
im not sure if this is helpful to you or not…but I wanted to say that during the week after my biopsy my tumour seemed like it had doubled in size and it stayed that large until removal. I was 4 weeks from biopsy to surgery and I was sure it was growing so incredibly fast. When removed it was actually less than 1 mm larger than they had estimated at the initial ultrasound! The core biopsy is a traumatic process on the body actually, and it produces its own scar tissue, bruising and reaction around the site of the tested area. It could be that you are having a response from the biopsy itself which is making the central tumour seem larger. I actually had pain from my tumour, even before biopsy it was giving a shooting burning pain across my chest, but after biopsy the area to my ribs was painful from the trauma of biopsy. THe timescales of waiting for chemo and removal are horrendous, as every lump and bump and slight tweak of pain feel like they must be something else going on…though I appreciate I was t being given the same information as you are about it draining another way etc.
I am hoping and wishing that you find out that there is no reason to feel too concerned, but I can entirely understand your fear and questions. Is the CT scan this coming week ? If there is anything else there, then that will be addressed by the chemo too. I’m not sure I’ve helped a lot, but just wanted to reply as I could feel your pain in your words.
charys x
Thank you so much for your replies. I’m feeling much more reassured now. Whilst I’m not looking forward to the chemo, I do just want to get started now.
Foxy, I did tell my surgeon about some pains I had been having and he told me not to worry and said you’d be surprised how many women start reporting new pains and symptoms after they’ve been diagnosed. I think he was basically saying that your mind can play tricks on you if stressed and anxious. But sometimes you just need that bit of extra reassurance as my mind is running (or sprinting) away with me right now!
Bibi, thank you. I’m actually (surprisingly) sleeping ok. What you say about thinking cells are pinging off all over the place is exactly what I’m going through right now. I’ve also recently found out about cancer liking stress hormones, like you say, so I am trying to be more mindful of that but it’s hard sometimes.
Charys, your post is extremely helpful, thank you! I have my CT scan on Tues but no idea when I get my results. But I wasn’t sure if the chemo would be enough if it’s spread elsewhere but sounds like it will be addressed by the chemo then if it has spread. Thank you so much for your reassurance.
Xx