What not to say!!

[Guest user]

my favourite response is to really quiz them or just tell them that my private affairs are none of their business. i understand that they are trying to make a living, but makes my blood boil.

[Guest user]

Re phone calls. We tend to go along with it, make an appointment to go and see them, or agree to attend their timeshare selling event, etc., and then just don't turn up.

The other one we sometimes do is to say "sorry, you need to speak to my wife/husband/dad/whatever; I'll go and get him/her." and then just leave the phone off the hook until the loud tone starts, which tells us they have given up and disconnected. I even had one ring again saying that we were cut off, to which I said "so you didn't get the hint then".

The annoying this is that we have been on the TPS register for about 5 years now, but we still get a lot of these calls.

[Guest user]

Hi ladies

Had to laugh at some of the comments recived. After i finished my last chemo session my ex husband patted me on the back and said "see the chemo wasn't as bad as you thought it would be" . words failed me.

[Lulu34]

val i have elderly neighbours and they take a while coming to the door... and have put a sign on their door asking not ring the bell to sell things..... thing it says 'unsolicited salesmen not welcome' im sure you can maybe do something similar.... saves their time too buggging the folk without signs!

rhian i hope the port went down well, even if the poor cheese was left on the shelf.... your boss sounds like a right eejit! BTW loving your new pic.

Lulu x

[Guest user]

biggles.... i know the man is a *********** it really got me down when i walked away, i felt i had, had to prove i had been ill.... but hey ho i am over it now and hopefully won't see him for another 5 months ... oh dear, think that is the port talking....decided to have a tot of port and a bit of cheese...seem to have forgotten to eat the cheese..

night night xxx

[Guest user]

scottishlass......maybe you should take a 16th century slant on things and from your upstairs window pour a bucket of something gruesome down on top of the offending caller 😉 xxxx he he

[Guest user]

Rhian - UNBELIEVABLE!!!! X

[scottishlass]

I usually get disturbed when I am in bed. The doorbell rings with someone offering to give me a quote for something or other....cleaning gutters, double glazing etc.....By the time I gingerly get down the stairs,hobbling as my joints are stiff, find the doorkeys etc, I am not in the best of moods by the time I get to the door.....Now I just shout out the landing window and ask who it is.....then if not a proper visitor I tell them they have woken me up and I am on Nightshift,,,,,,and NOT to disturb me again......How can you stop people rining your doorbell? ....

[Guest user]

Re telephone calls....I usually reply to the question"is there anything else I can help you with?" .....with the answer......well a cure for cancer would be nice as that is what I have been suffering with and I don't intend to spend any more of my time on inane phone calls....., they usually put the phone down on me then....lol.

[Guest user]

met my boss today, haven't seen him for quite some time, July I think, He is struggling with why i am not ready to bounce back to work,( even though they no longer pay me) and i was explaining to him why it is i feel worse now than when i was diagnosed...aches, fatigue and generally a bit down ...i went on to say that the aches might also be due to the onset of the early menopause and lack of oestregon.... this was most prob a bit too much info for a rather shallow male of the species....his response was......'Can't they just stick one of those patches on you' !!!! i was truly gobsmacked :)and almost smacked him in the gob

xxx

[Guest user]

There is a telephone preference service which you can contact to stop unsolicited 'phone calls;

http://www.tpsonline.org.uk

.... or you can just be rude to them and tell them to **** off!

AlexG

[Guest user]

I had five calls asking if I wanted to make a will during this year!
I mentioned this to my breast nurse as it is totally inapproprate.
I asked one of the callers where they had got my number from since but they were unforthcoming.Car

[truffle_shuff]

yes so have I, well hubby took the call , so wont post his reply, just wondering what list they are working from????

take care xx

[Guest user]

I've recently had an unsolicited call asking if I would like to make a will!!

[elinda45]

Lulu that has to be one of the worse things I've heard - I can just imagine it - such a sales man thing.....

I was at my brother's the other day when someone he used to work with called in. I said hello to him and he turned round and said 'oh you survived' in a surprised way. I was diagnosed in February 09 and have just finished my treatment so I was a bit stunned and not sure quite how to reply.

Elinda x

[Lulu34]

awww leigh kids can be so sweet and innocent cant they.

i had a call from a tele sales man for hsbc the other day... who i bank with..... nad said it was a courtesey call.... i told i didnt feel like talking and i had already asked them not to hassle me with calls cos i was having cancer treatment....

he said 'sorry to hear that, but do you mind me asking how much longer you have to live?'

i couldnt believe it.... i just said i dont know im not psychic... still cant believe he would actually ask somebody that... what was he gonna do?... try and sell me life insurance???? daft eejit!

Lulu xxx

[Guest user]

One of my step-daughters came round with the grandchildren today - love it when they come!!:) Oldest one of ( years caught drift of conversation about my hair loss and said ' but nannie - didn't you get a non moulting dog coz you didn't want hair all over the carpet?!!' to which hubbie said 'Yep - she never thought about that did she'!!

And then the 6 year old grabbed a plate and said 'never mind nannie, i'll walk behind and catch it' !!

I love my little babes

Hubbie - where's them clippers?

Love to all Leigh xx

[Guest user]

Hi Eva-Marie, your post made me laugh. Hi again Karen, I am sorry you have had even more crap with the blood thing. My Chemo nurses say we are to go to them for bloods if in any doubt. My veins are difficult or non existent. The ones they do find have a tendency to collapse. I had to have two shots at getting the venflon in for my chemo yesterday.

I talked to a friend today who has just moved back to this Island (Isle of Wight) from the Isle of Man and I said I had some devastating News. She asked first about any good news, then asked about my family then I told her about the BC and she said “Is that it I thought it was going to be something worse than that” I am still not sure how to take it!

I am taking clippers away with me over Christmas to be on the safe side but with a bit of luck I may keep it till the new year!!

Love to you all Vicky XX

[Guest user]

I went down to a number one when my hair started to fall out this time last year, but even those little bits fall out too so i use to give my haed a brush with a very soft baby brush over the sink as the little bit can be a bit itchy when they come off in the bed 🙂

still try the competions, your hair will grow back ladies, mine started to grow back in June and i recently had it cut 🙂

r xx

[Guest user]

my hubby just cut mine this morning, to a number 2. Wearing a hat inside now,

just had 2 emails - one to win a hair straighter/and hair dryer. The other to win a years supply of shampoo/conditioner.

[Guest user]

Hi Leigh, I went for a number 1. Think I have mentioned that before. Have been borrowing hubby's thermal hat!

Snoogle
x

[Guest user]

Well here's a conversation I never thought I would have with my husband....

What number clipper do I want for my future hair cut????!!!!

He usually has a number 2 but thinks I might find this quite cold!!!!

I'm not sure the effects of chemo have fully sunk in yet bless him!:)

Decisions Decisions number 2 or 3...

Leigh xx

[Guest user]

Here is something....went to hospital last week for pre-op assesement which involved a blood test! Sat in chair lady who was about to put needle in arm said 'Oh i have not done this for about a years....i hope i know what i am doing'......then got the vein for which there is only one in my arm......and missed.....tried the hand and then..............i passed out!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Karen xx

[Guest user]

Just to go a bit off subject! This has been a cr*p year in which my mum and I were both diagnosed with cancer. I've recently found myself buying lottery tickets (something I never did before) and entering competitions on the basis that my luck has to change soon. I'd laugh if it wasn't so pathetic.

Jan xx

[kittyw]

Just when I thought I had got away with crap remarks for a while my sister rang me to let me know that her granddaughter Lizzy [ my very favourite great neice] who is expecting her first child has been admitted to hospital with a blood clot in her lung. Well says sis thats our bad luck over as IT comes in threes. I had to ask who were the three. First you she says then me then lizzy. I really couldn't comment as I was gobsmacked she was counting her bout of dihorrea.
ps. lizzy is doing well and hopefully my sister will also pull through. take care kittyx

[Guest user]

We had an electrician at our house to do some work yesterday. Whilst he was there, Janet went out with some lady friends and, having noticed that she had no hair, he asked me about her. When I told him that she is being treated for breast cancer, he mentioned that he lost his wife to cancer about 10 years ago. he went on to say "...but it was not a mild form like breast cancer, it was cancer of the womb."

I tried to explain things without appearing too annoyed. After all, he lost his wife, was a really nice guy, and his comment was probably just down to lack of knowledge, but I have to admit I felt a strange mixture of feelings.

[Guest user]

lol that sounds like our house last night, but i was the one spraying!

[truffle_shuff]

just a small one,

New one from OH, .

not to be tooo graphic, but chemo plus tons of veggie's is giving me terrible wind, just cant help it, on the movicol, . I am however very polite and if I feel it is going to be bad I take nyself off to bed. Now if OH walks in I just say .... sorry full of wind . he says that's ok but then starts to spray the room with glade. now thats when my tember goes, just cannot raise a laugh then !!!!!!

[Guest user]

Any time honey - pm if you want. All the "veterans" are very helpful and many are really knowledgeable about bc.

Love
Jane x

[Guest user]

Hi Jane, yes it must be awful. Thanks so much for yesterday, your support really helped.
take care
anna

[Guest user]

Hi Anna

It must be really awful for anyone in that situation and your heart goes out to them.

Hope you are okay today and thinking of you and hoping you are getting all the practical, emotional and informational advice and support you need.

Love

Jane x

[Guest user]

hi, maybe you should get him to google that, i worked on a urology ward when i first qualified and it does happen, men can get cancer there and men do have amputations. Although i only worked there for 18months and it didnt happen that often when i was there.
take care
anna

[Guest user]

Okay - so I have just tried to put frozen peas on a baking tray for the oven!! ... but when I was heard to mutter out loud that maybe I am already suffering 'chemobrain' - hubbie quick as a whippet comes back with 'You know chemo could be good for you aside from getting rid of the cancer the hair loss may just cure your blondeness!!!

Where's the sharpest knife!!!:)

May lose the blondeness but bet it wont cure the Essex bit of me!! 🙂 Oops I've owned up - Oops again!!!!

Back to my peas x

[Guest user]

Yesterday a young male relative told me to pull myself together because I have been feeling really down recently and that losing a breast was no big deal. I replied "How would you feel if you lost your penis?". He answered that it was hardly as important a part - wait for it - after all no man would have his penis removed as a preventative measure for any cancer when women have their boobs removed all the time. Mind you, his girlfriend has a full set and he has described what little e knows of my treatment as gross.

And people tll you that sharing your feelings with those close to you is a good idea.....

Love
Jane x

[Guest user]

Awaiting the inevitable 2 weeks post FEC and my OH keeps humming the Benny Hill theme tune to me. Don't think he means he will chase me around in my bikini more the little bald bloke he pats on the head.

[Guest user]

How cool, its great to be able to laugh at it all. My kids called me uncle fester too. And even after being bald for a couple of months i used to get a shock when i walked past a mirror and have to take a second look at the bald stranger looking out at me 🙂

[Guest user]

on the subject of hair loss. After being left with a fairly maingy head of hair (it didn't all fall out!) I went with my kids to the hairdressers. Made a joke of it with my 6 year old boy and we dared each other to have the shortest hair cut. He ended up with a number 2 whilst I had a number 1 grade. Yay, Mummy won!

[Guest user]

lol sounds like you feel as feminine as me? Heyho we will soon all be looking good.

[Guest user]

well i cant talk i have tonight had a shower and turned into Harry Hill - well almost. Big bald patches ha ha. Couldnt help laughing. Just need the specs and all the way!!!

[Guest user]

lol you should have said he does too!

[Guest user]

My OH said same thing to me. Said i looked like a lesbian!!!! Bloomin cheek cos his is same length - almost ha ha

[Guest user]

lol my nephew said i look like a boy! good job hes my nephew, oh and only 8 years old.

[Guest user]

ha ha i had that one from
my mum
my sis
my son
my daughter x 2

oh and i got you don't look as if you have cancer anymore you just look like someone with a bad hairdresser 🙂 xxxxx

[Guest user]

When my hair started growing back my mum said now i just looked like a "rough looking lesbian" rather than someone with cancer!
good job yourre my mum!!

[Guest user]

MX A Doddle !!!!!

[truffle_shuff]

love it,

My Oh has just announced , over dinner table , to all , that he now thinks we should get private medical insurance, not becuse of my recent ld flap and chemo............... but he has just got a colon test kit through the post to send back............... just couldnt help it ,told him he only has to poo in a cup for lords sake, and then put cup in bin please .................... not major is it ?????

pass the puddin please

love to all

xx

[Guest user]

Hi All

Love this thread keep em coming!

When my ex hubby contacted me after hearing I had BC from our daughter, one of the first things he asked was 'well how did that happen'. I rambled on with what I felt was a pretty good layman explanation of what the BS had said. On finishing he was a bit quiet and then said ' I wouldn't have thought small breasted women would get BC -- after all you only have aspirin's on an ironing board size wise'!!!!
Its not wonder we divorced - Thank God for hubby No 2 !!!! 🙂

Leigh xxx

[aliceblue]

On a similiar vein... I was in hospital in June with the first of many stays due to neutropenia.

I had just had my hair cut short and my hair was just falling out after first FEC cycle.

Ok so I wasn't looking my best. Mouth doctor (come to see why I had developed a swollen jaw along with everything else) looked over at my friend (same age - 44) and said in all honesty "is this your daughter"! After we recovered from the shock, we couldn't stop laughing - doctor practically ran out of the ward. Asked husband to bring in best photo from our wedding in 2008 to prop up on the bedside cabinet to remind me how I used to look.

Keep them coming, such a fantastic thread.

[Guest user]

I am increasingly growing to love this thread! As a Brit living in Germany the humour gap is especially clear when your wife has got BC...

We were cheered up no end (and we laughed so much it nearly was the end!) a couple of weeks ago when my wife was in hospital with an infection.

The hospital has got a voluntary service called "The Green Ladies" (green, because they wear green tabards). On came into my wife's room and aksed if she needed anything blablabla. Then she saw me and my wife's sister and asked if we were the parents!

To be fair, my wife is a very youthful looking 32 and I'm an *ahem* not so youthful looking 39 (to put this into some sort of context: I was in the States when I was 26 and the two other blokes, one of whom was in his mid 30s, were asked for ID in a bar. when I asked the been there, done that, designed the T-short bar maid why she didn't need my ID she replied, "You're obviously way old enough!"

But we had a good 10 minutes of hysterical laughter after that!

[truffle_shuff]

love it .bless em , mines took on the form of a space man since diagnosis , just reminded of op, day after recon, I asked him to bring me in a pot of jelly. came next day with a pack of 24 jellies!!!!, then proceeded to force feed me nearly knocking my bridge work out.

have to laugh

take care all xx