I'm trying to convince myself with the 'I know I can handle.....' 🙂 I'm just wishing the next 36 hours away, so I'll know next steps.
Thanks Jill. I know I can handle whatever Wednesday brings.
Re: early screening trial - the consultant radiologist I spoke to estimated that if I hadn't been invited as part of the trial, it could potentially have been 4 - 5 years before I was screened. Puts it into perspective for me. I'm very grateful.
For me, part of the reason for not telling more people is that there are then less people to make daft comments (despite best of intentions). Near the start of this thread, I mentioned that I'd not told many people. I told my manager at work, out of necessitation because of time off for appointments, etc. Generally my manager has been great but on two occasions has mentioned friends who, in her words, 'had proper cancer'. I'm still not 100% clear on what 'proper cancer' is? I was at first diagnosed with Pleomorphic LCIS, and after a WLE I was then advised that tiny spots of invasive cells were found. An MRI showed up additional areas which have been biopsied and I'm getting the results of a sentinel lymph node biopsy on Wednesday. At which point does this all become 'proper'? I'm keeping everything in perspective, I think. I'm lucky that this was caught early (thanks to an invitation to take part in the mammogram screening trial for the 46-49 age group). And I'm generally a positive person, but waiting for Wednesday's appointment is testing me, and I'm glad that no-one else at work knows so I can concentrate on the day-to-day stuff at work.
My boob has started throbbing, don't know if it is bruised inside,? I am like you Emma desperate to start treatment, and thinking its everywhere, I am sing onvolgist Monday, I have not had scan yet, I can't believe that this time few weeks sgk, I was normal, I am very tiers st min, think its all the stress, I honestly am still hoping to wake from a nightmare,
That's funny Eileen my sister in law complained about a paper cut & steroid injection. I really had to bite my tongue & not say ' have you ever had a breast biopsy or breast cancer' but I thought my sarcasm might be lost on her. I've only told close family & a few friends at the moment but have only known a few weeks & haven't started treatment yet so might have to tell more people then.
I have had a few friends ringing /texting to tell me their mamogram was clear(phew) ,well not sure how that helps me, mine wasnt ...
My cancer treatment finished in March 2015 and I am doing okay but this is what happened when I 'broke the news' to someone immediately after diagnosis.
I said "today I had some really bad news
I have cancer I've got the dreaded big C
They've found a huge lump in my breast
I'll need an op, chemo then radiotherapy"
She said "well fancy that, I'm suffering too
I bruised my boob today, oh poor little me
Can I come to see you, I'm black and blue
Be a dear and make me a nice cup of tea!"
No I didn't give her a black eye to match, but believe me I was sorely tempted!
I told everyone, family, friends, colleagues, even Facebook acquaintances! Reason being I knew my routines and life would change during this as I'm a bit of a joker and party animal (kids just grown up and I'm at the parents behaving badly stage haha). I didn't want people coming to their own conclusions of why I wasn't doing fun things, why I wasn't at work and why I may be quieter than normal on social media platforms, which I'm a big user of. BUT everyone is different and everyone's life was at different stages in life before BC so it is a very individual choice of who and when to tell anyone. Kerry x x
I agree. I'd also add that our bummer of a diagnosis does require our employers to make reasonable adjustments so don't feel guilty about not being able to go into work. I work for the government and throughout my chemo since late October I have worked at home (my choice) with laptop and BB even though my GP signed me off for 5 months. There were days when I couldn't really concentrate with calls mentally and other days when I couldn't concentrate to read more than a page. My recall memory had also gone a bit bizarre. I think it's called chemo brain! When I've seen my NHS oncologist in Central London every three weeks my manager has even met me to have a catch up. She's been brilliant.
When I have my op in a few weeks I'll definitely sign off for a couple of weeks at least. No guilt whatsoever. We all have enough to deal with on this rollercoaster.