My OH is very emotional and I have been so impressed with how he has stepped up. A lot of it is just being there for her, emotional support is the small things, a squeezed hand, a loveing smile at a difficult moment and a random kiss in passing. I have found it hard stepping back on the housework etc, just help out when asked and offer but don't force it if she seems willing and able to do something. I have found that there is nothing like being told that you can't do something to give you an intense desire to do it! Maybe I am just bloody minded!
i know that what I crave most is normality so if you regularly do something like say a pub quiz etc, try to do it if you both feel up to it. Finding activities and places where you can act normally and have a laugh really helps. When my dad had Oesophageal cancer earlier this year what he said he wanted more than anything was not to talk about cancer all the time.
There will be times when the pressure will get to both of you, when it does just take a step back and remember that this time will pass and although you will both be changed people in some ways afterwards your core values will still be there. Good luck with everything.
Hi Paulie, your wife is very lucky having you supporting her. I know you think you're not doing anything, but just being there for her will mean a lot.
Hope everything goes well tomorrow and thinking of you both xx
Hi Poppy, I didn't have the wire, so I can't tell you about that I'm afraid, but I had the injection for SNB. The injection felt like a little sting, but it doesn't last long at all.You don't know anything about the blue dye as that is put in during the op.
I can understand you thinking the cancer is spreading, a lot of us feel like that too, but I think it's only natural. xx
Honestly you will be fine. I am absolutely terrified of needles and I did not feel a thing when they did the wire insertion and it only took minutes. Regarding the blue dye mine was inserted whilst I was asleep as part of the op. The day before I had to go and have a clear fluid injected just above the nipple but again it just felt like a small scratch and was over in seconds xx
I remember getting up to go to the loo on the night of the op, looked in the mirror & saw a lovely smurf look, followed by bright blue wee, green poo followed...so yay! Still got a very slight blue tinge on my nipple though.
No Optimissy, I wasn't warned about the poo either and had a bit of a shock when I saw myself in the mirror on the evening of the op! I've normally got a lot of colour in my cheeks and there was nothing! My daughter said that she was shocked when she saw me! Thankfully I looked more like myself by the next morning! xx
really glad all is well with you. x (Suppose we ought to warn Anita about the blue pee and green poo...........they warned me to expect the blue wee and corpse-like pallor after the dye, but not a word about the poo - unless that was just me.)
I had the isotope done on the morning of my operation very quick just like any injection really, they then put a yellow wristband on me to show that I was radioactive but I didn't need to stay away from people or anything.
the blue dye makes you look very ill after your op but it is a visual grey blue tinge to the skin and you don't feel as bad as you look. The dye then leaves your body within 24-48 hours. My wee was proper blue loo blue and I was warned that if I cried my tears might be blue, but I didn't cry so didn't get to find out!
I was very tired and fragile for about 48 hours after the op which I think was down to the anaesthetic as much as anything. The pain was manageable with paracetamol and ibuprofen and one week on the pain from the SNB is worse than the lumpectomy site. I think that they have to move nerves out of the way to get to them, somit feels like I have chafed under my arm but I think it isn't the nerve pain, perfectly manageable though. I had my op on Friday 11th August and I had last week off work, I took the morning's slowly and spent a fair amount of time on this forum, then by Tuesday I was washing windows and by Wednesday I could hang the washing out. I haven't done anything heavy and fortunately mine is on the left side and I am right handed so it hasn't restricted me too much. I had an afternoon nap on the first two days and since then I have just been going to bed early and getting up slowly.
good luck with your treatment
There should be some specific info on the procedure on the main site, but for personal experience here goes.
I had the wire localisation on the morning of the op rather than the day before, but like you I was a bit concerned that it would move. It doesn't - they put a sticky dressing or something over it so it stays where they put it. I had my wire put in using the mammogram machine, so they can see exactly where to put it. While not painful as such, I am a real wuss about mammos anyway so before each procedure I ever had where I was going to have my boob clamped in (including routine 3 yearly mammos before) I took 2 paracetamol about 1 and a half hours beforehand, and it is surprisingly effective. NOTHING with aspirin in though as that would thin the blood.I also had the isotope radioactive stuff put in on the day of the op - no pain there - just a tiny scratch like having a flu jab. I think the blue dye is what they put in during the op while you are under, so they can see the sentinel node or nodes that it drains to so they know which one(s) to take out. I too was confused when I had my procedures, as i thought the blue dye was the same as the isotope but it isn't.There is such a lot of new information to take in, it is like learning a foreign language isn't it? I'm 8 months on from my WLE and SNB and can hardly remember it all, but recovery was quick and I've had 2 foreign holidays since then after rads ended, so be assured, the unknown will soon be knwn, and not half as scary as we think it will be in advance! I thought I'd be reclining for days in front of the DVDs after my op, looking weak and feeble: I wasn't! Up and about and apart from not overusing the arm on the op side, feeling pretty good. All the very best of luck with it all.xxxxx