Hi all,
I’m posting like bonkers at the moment…just one of those times. Would really like to hear about how you all approached working etc. I gave up my job in March to try a new career (got some money…spent lots of it on debts and sparkly things). Took some bits and got fab p/t short term contract. Started Sept, loved it, Thought I’d found perfect job, they talked of renewing me permanently in March 09, then diagnosed in late Oct. Have been trying to work from home, but heart not in it. Now they asking me if I want to go down as “sick” from jan until end contract in March 09. Know people work through chemo, but I just gave in a bit to it all. Also couldn’t face the (bus and train) commute. Like the brain work , but hate missing deadlines etc. Hubbie thinks I should try to keep going (money and to stop me geting depressed and because I loved it). Start Tax in Jan and then surgery I guess and then a year (argh!!!) of herceptin. Don’t know whether to fight and keep working or just allow myself some time out. Don’t know whether to act as if I could be up and running for work again in Spring (and maybe they will have me back) ,so cling to things or think maybe I could get worse news health wise and to take some time (have 3 year old). Feel like I should have been better and more active at keeping the work going. If I was in safe old job (timing never my strength!!!), I’d just go off sick and take the good sick pay i would have got!! I know you can’t make decisions for me, but I just wondered how some of you approached things.
Apols for long post.
Gailxx
The main thing for me was to asses how I felt about it. I love my work, I practically live for it sometimes and the idea of not being able to do my thing felt too depressing (I build websites but the kind that empower people rather than just sells stuff). In the end I realised that the idea of hoaving all of my life dictated by a bl**dy disease for a year was too much so I struggled onwards through chemo and I’m really glad I did as it would have been hard to go from not working at all back to full speed which I’m just about at now (Last chemo 16th Sept, Finished Rads 7th November) So based on my recovery time I really wouldn’t expect to get back to work at full speed until at least a month after your rads if you’re doing them.
I wasn’t able to work anywhere near as hard as I did and I do work from home, don’t think I could have done it if I had to commute to be honest.
You say your heart’s not in it. I wonder what you mean by that, if it’s that you’re too tired to work can I suggest trying a couple of weeks having a structured day where you and little un go out for a 30 min walk at the start and do an hour or 2’s work later in the day and stick to that, no more and see how you get on.
Or if it’s more that you really don’t feel like it then I think you should go sick as giving yourself time to recover isn’t a waste of time either.
I know that’s not an answer for you but hopefully gives you something to ponder.
Right… back to work for me (still catching up 
Angie
Hi Gail
I can only say how I approached it. My dx was on 30th April 08 and I worked until 6th May and have not worked since. I had surgery on 7th May, then chemo then rads. Reading on here that some people work at least part of the time they are on chemo made me feel guilty for not working, but you have to consider your reaction to the drugs and what kind of work you do. I am a lawyer, and had chemo brain from the first dose onwards so did not feel up to working mentally, apart from all other hideous side effects. I am lucky in that I have great sick pay, which made the decision easier. My bcn said that my family (husband and children aged 4 and 2) would have to cope in the bad times so they deserved to have me during the better times whilst undergouing treatment, and this kind of gave me permission to be off.
Just finished rads and back to work, half days at first, in January.
Good luck whatever you decide
Kinden
x
Actually Kinden makes areally good point there. About a third of my job is learning as the world of programming does not sit still and involves a fair amount of higher level thinking. I found I could still trace my way around complex code just fine but could I take on board new information. Not a hope it was in one ear and out the other so Kinden’s right it really does depend on how you react to the drugs and the kind of work you do.
Hi,
Thanks for your thoughts. Chemo brain just about sums me up!! I’m a lecturer in management…but because slight career change…much new learning involved. That’s probably my problem…I was still new when diagnosed. Have not been doing any delivery, (can’t “perform” at the moment), but have done some course development from home. Just can’t concentrate though and am finding marking really really hard (I always did…but now worse). I’ve let them down a bit. I think I’m partly clinging because I’m so cross that just when I found lovely new career, the BC bombshell dropped. If I’d stayed where I was…boring job but safe benefits…but then…might never have ventured out I guess!!!
Gailxx
Hi Gail
I think it very much depends on what you do. I didn’t need chemo, but took time off sick during radiotherapy mainly because I have to commute on the train and it would be too much stress and also big risk of getting some horrible bug. Trains apparently, are the worst culprit for spreading diseases as one good sneeze can pass on bugs to loads of others. I also have quite a stenuous job physically so needed to be feeling quite strong before working. However, if I worked in an office where if I had a bad day could take things easy, I would have definitely have gone in. Do cling on to your nice new career, though. You won’t feel like this for ever and being in a job you love is so important. I too had just started my new job in the November and was diagnosed in January and needed five months off. When I did go back, I really thought I would have to give it up as couldn’t keep up as not only was I still new to it, but felt so frail for the first few weeks and despaired that I would never learn it properly. Now a year later and I absolutely love it and am so glad I clung onto it for dear life. People need time off for all sorts of reasons - one of my colleagues has broken her foot badly and will need four months off - hang on in there!
Hi all,
Looks like I’ve not coped like you other ladies…
I was diagnosed in July 07 with stage 3, grade 3. Due to the size of the tumour etc I had 5 months of chemo first, then a mx with full anc when they found cancer in 12/22 lymph nodes and some muscle tissue, then rads til March 08. A bone scan at the time of orig diagnosis showed some cancer to one vertebrae & some ribs. As I was a mortgage adviser for a major bank, I was immediately advised to get signed off sick due to the risk of picking up infections, possible chemo brain, fatigue etc,etc.
Apart from a very brief month in Aug when I managed 2 mornings a week, I’ve been off work ever since & have just been signed off for another 3 months, making that 20 months in total. I feel a real failure & guilty about not coping when all you others have much more to put up with than me. (I have just edited this post after reading all the other ones here)
Nevertheless what I would say is give it a go if you want - some of it for me was to try and go back to normality - but don’t be afraid to hold your hands up and go off if it doesn’t feel right. And see what docs etc say…
Regards, Liz
Hi All
Just thought I’d add my thoughts as work is something I’ve been thinking about lately.
I was diagnosed in July and have been having chemo for the past five/six months with two more sessions to go. I have worked all the way through, taking a week to 7 days off after each bout of chemo and then working part time for a week and full time (if I could manage it) for a week. I felt I needed to work if only to keep me sane and give me some order and stability in my life.
My company have been really good about this, however I am now getting really tired all the time and am considering slowing down and taking more time off. Also the chemo brain means I’m not working at my normal level and I worry that I make mistakes which doesn’t help.
However, as others have said here, everyone is different and you need to make the best choice for you.
Lynn
Hi all. I’m just over half way through my chemo and have managed to keep working 2 weeks out of three BUT I only work part-time (never went back full time after the kids, even though they’re now teenagers). Going to work has been great - I like my job and my colleagues, and it’s very healthy to feel like the old pre-BC me for a few days. Only a few close friends know I’m in a wig.
Liz
Hi,
I think I am siding with Liz in how I have reacted to having BC and please don’t feel guilty about work - when was that the main reason for being here? I am a teacher, which might make the decision easier as I was told straight off, no way could I spend time with 1200 children while my immune system took a big hit with the chemo. You have to take into account your personal situation, money, type of job, any children and their ages, your age, your general health, and then just what you want to do. I have not been to work since the end of March. I worked after dx up to the date of my op and have not been back since. I take the view that I need to nurture my body, not try to make it function as normal while being regularly poisoned (28 weeks chemo), cut open (3ops), fried with radiation (15) not to mention fighting side effects and STRESS at having cancer. I decided that just getting through the big agenda was already a tall order for me, without work too. I switched off my alarm and just let my body decide what it needed. So I slept until I woke up naturally, ate whatever I felt like and tried to save energy by convalescing on the sofa, just doing things I wanted to between treatments, like meeting friends and fun things. I know this is a luxury and not possible for many people and I am sorry that others have a much heavier load especially when children are tiny, limiting their choices in when they can rest. I have 4 but none are young. I just took some ‘me time’ for a change and found that most people supported me, so no guilt really. It may be a coincidence but my neuts and blood counts have been high, even went up on chemo, which I think is an indicator that resting was right for me. Lots of luck with your choice. It is different for all of us. I am going back to work in Jan if ok after rads and looking forward to it as I love my job too but it is a job. Teaching has to be 100% and no way could I have been what I should on chemo. Probably wouldn’t remember any names!!
Lots of luck to everyone and this is the time to be selfish and do what you want.
Love
Lily x
I can only really repeat what others have said here. It’s such a personal decision but not one I had a problem with as I have a good job with a very supportive employer and an automatic right to 6 months off on full pay.
I’m a Project Manager for a large organisation 40 miles form home, have 2 children at school and a hubby who weekly commutes so my normal routine is competely manic. The job is very technical and full-on - like most working mothers working part-time I was doing a full time job over 20 hours a week, leaving the house at 0730, driving a total of 110 miles, then returning at 1700 with 2 very tired and hungry children in tow! Not something to even contemplate while undergoing chemo!
My 6 months is up at the end of Feb, which is when I’ll be half way through radio. I might go back one day a week until that’s over IF (and it’s a very big if) I’m feeling OK as I know I’ll get bored once the kimo-brain wears off (it will, won’t it!!!) and I do actually miss being at work.
I’m also viewing this 6 months as total me-time and a sabbatical purely for me. I’m very fortunate in that I live close to a Haven so go there twice a week for yoga, massage etc and love it! I’ve met some lovely ladies there (just like you!) and hopefully we’ll stay in touch once I go back into the big bad world of work.
Bella x
Hi all,
It has been so useful to hear from all of you. I had been feeling so crap about “giving in” to the chemo and to the diagnosis itself. My hubbie was so keen for me to keep going too!! Why am I not Trisha like person who can jog to the train station??? Thought I would be able to keep going, but some days I just want to do absolutely nothing and not feel guilty. My employer have almost made the decision for me - to put me on sick leave. I just haven’t been delivering enough and it’s quite hard to hear that after being a worker!! I’m not sure I’ll get any money as I haven’t been there long enough and I’m fixed term. I feel sad, but relieved in a way. Someone earlier talked about wanting to use the well times for the people you love and I think I feel that. The thought of starting January trying to juggle things was getting me down a bit. BUT… I did have such hopes for my new job. I guess for me it’s the memory of all my hopes a few months back and how excited I was…almost smug!! BC has just made me desire and long for so much!!! BUT…am realising that maybe career girl needs to clam down a bit and have some fun in all this crap. Thank you. Now going to pass by the fruit bowl and eat a load of chocolate! Gxx